"I can see your room in the background," Leonard told him as he rounded the corner hall.
Back in the living room, Penny looked at her two couch-mates and asked: "OK which of you weirdos wants to buy my panties...only fourteen hundred bucks."
Their eyes opened as wide as saucers and Raj began whispering in Howard's ear. Howard spoke: "do we get to watch you take them off...you know, to authenticate that they're yours."
Penny was completely shocked that they had called her bluff. She had been certain that it was just a joke, but if they were actually willing to pay her that much money...why not. "Sure," she told them, "I'll do it right now."
Howard agreed by saying: "you know I'll have to go to the bank and give you the money tomorrow; but we're good for it."
"You better be; I know people who can hurt you," she answered. Looking around to make sure Leonard was not coming back, she stood up, reached up under her dress and slowly slid her panties down her long shapely legs. She had worn a skimpy transparent pink lace pair and it was now twirling around her finger, right in their faces.
"Holy shit," Howard raised his voice as he grabbed them and clutched them in his hand. He fought the urge to bury his nose in them and turned to Raj. She couldn't hear what they were saying, but knew they were arguing about who got custody of them the first night. Raj rushed over to the kitchen, rummaged around and returned with a Ziploc bag. They quickly stuffed the worn panties into the plastic bag to conserve her earthy scent.
"I would offer to sell you my bra, but I rarely wear one," she admitted, and they just nodded their heads in pleasant agreement. The rest of the evening continued normally; if any evening that involved Sheldon can be considered normal.
When she had returned to her apartment across the hall, Penny changed into more comfy clothes and sat on her sofa just ruminating about her life, career and love life. Tomorrow she would pay off her debt to Leonard, but knew it was just a matter of time before he would financially bail her out again, since her acting career was going nowhere. She had made the lowest budget "Serial-Apeist" when she first arrived in California, but the only offers she had gotten since then were for soft and hardcore porn. Her agent had been brutally honest with her when assessing her acting skills: "Penny, you're a sweet person, but I hope your waitressing talents are better than your acting." He had basically told her to call him if she changed her mind about the porn.
Trying not to be discouraged she had continues her acting classes, and firmly believed she had improved. She realized that her whole lifestyle depended on receiving huge tips at the Cheesecake Factory, which was why she always undid a couple extra buttons on her blouse for the male customers and made a point of bending over a lot. A slow tip month, or any unexpected expenses meant borrowing from Leonard. "Ahh, Leonard," she thought, "what a sweetheart. Always there for me and never expecting anything in return. Chivalrous, that was what he was." They had dated for awhile, but once when they were basking in the afterglow of incredible sex, he had told her he loved her.
Having been dumped herself a few times, she was now very leery of commitment of any kind and had quickly told him they should just be friends. She knew deep down that Leonard would never break her heart, but just couldn't bring herself to commit to a nerd. It was a shame though, because the sex was unbelievable. He was definitely king of foreplay and she regarded his penis to be the perfect size for her: nine inches of super fat meat. While thinking of him, her hand had drifted down inside her shorts and was rubbing herself through her new panties. When she realized what she was doing, she swiftly yanked her hand out and smiled to herself, thinking: "if he only knew what he did to me."
Since breaking up, she was now on her third boyfriend and knew that none of them had been as much fun as the nerd across the hall. She and Leonard had gone out, as friends, a few times since the breakup; mostly when their other friends were busy. Once they had run into each other on the stairs and Leonard had invited her to accompany him to the park and fly his drone. It turned out to be the most fun she had ever had on a date; even though it really wasn't a date. He had invited her to their paintball contests; which she loved.
Once she had invited him to the movies with the stipulation that she got to pick the movie. She had chosen a Jennifer Aniston comedy which he grudgingly admitted he enjoyed. He endeared himself to her by telling her that she was just as good an actress as Aniston. Reluctantly, she had to admit they were extremely compatible.
The next morning she answered her door before her eyes were completely open; the sun barely streaming in her bedroom window; and Howard handed her a puffy envelope. He lingered too long on her threshold, staring at her nipples poking through her thin white tank-top and she slammed the door without even speaking. Truthfully she enjoyed the effect she had on men and a smile crossed her face as her thumb flipped through the cash in the envelope. Sitting on the sofa, she pondered how easy it had been to extract money from the nerds just with her sexuality...no work involved. Her rent would be due in another two weeks and there was no way she wouldn't be late with it.
Sighing deeply, she came to a conclusion that probably the time had arrived when she was going to have to use her natural attributes and talents to earn some money. It wasn't like it was the first time she had thought about acting in "adult" films; her agent had mentioned several times that Casting Directors had looked at her pictures and suggested it. Rationalizing, she reminded herself of how much she enjoyed sex and that getting paid for it was just a bonus. Without even realizing it, she thought to herself that she wished Leonard was a porn star. Plopping down on the couch, she grabbed her phone and punched in her agent's number.
"Hi, Jerry...it's Penny. I'm ready," was all she had to say.
Penny could almost hear him smiling as he knew immediately what she was referring to and replied, "well that's great...let's make some money. You called at the most opportune time; my buddy Garret Lewis is casting for a new film and I've shown him your topless scene from Serial Ape-ist several times. He loves your look and I'm betting he'll cast you without an audition. Let me call him and get back to you. You're making the smart decision." Within two hours Jerry had called her back with the good news that she had a job. He gave her an address in Burbank; which meant she would have to ask Leonard to borrow his car. She would meet with this Garret the next day to take care of paperwork and get a script.
She immediately called Leonard at work and, as expected, he agreed without even asking the reason: "sure...anytime, you know that. We'll swap keys tonight at the Cheesecake Factory. You're in luck: tonight's Anything-Goes-Thursday and Sheldon wants his favorite cheeseburger." She knew he was being sarcastic, because no waitress in the world would feel lucky to see Sheldon Cooper walking into their restaurant. Once again she was reminded of how sweet Leonard could be, and he always seemed to be there when she needed him. Knowing she was going to be naked on camera, she decided to take a nice long bath and shave everything from the neck down.
Friday morning she dressed in her favorite skinny-jeans and a tank top for her trip to Burbank, knowing she didn't have to impress the Director: she already had the job. How great that phrase sounded in her head as she slid behind the wheel of Leonard's car and turned the key. No "Check Engine" light; what a nice and comforting sight. "He's such a sweetie," she thought as she drove to her meeting feeling both apprehensive and excited. Using the GPS on her phone, the destination looked like a big warehouse. Walking inside, on shaky knees, she discovered that part of the warehouse was partitioned off into offices, and other parts sectioned off into various rooms used as film sets.
A pleasant receptionist looked her up and down and then escorted her to Garret Lewis' office. He reminded her of the actor who played the character Deacon, on King of Queens and seemed genuinely pleased to meet her. "Jerry has told me so much about you that I feel like we're old friends," he stated as she settled into a nice leather chair. "I loved you in Serial Ape-ist; the movie was horrible but you made it worth watching." Penny felt like she was actually blushing as he continued: "you have a great ass. You're a little small on top, but perfectly shaped...if you want a career in this business, you really should consider some augmentation."
That took a little wind out of her sails because she had always been so proud of "the twins;" and she wanted to respond that she had no intention of making porn her career, but didn't want to put her chance on this film in jeopardy.
Handing her a folder, he continued: "here is your script; of course the dialog really isn't all that important in these films, and some improvisation is expected as long as the storyline isn't compromised. The premise is that you are a first-year teacher, fresh from your student-teaching assignment and you've been assigned a job in a troubled inner-city school because you have the least seniority. You come in with high standards and are failing several students. In the first scene you are in charge of the detention room after school and get into a confrontation with a few of your students. It's a pretty straight-forward multiple-partner sex scene."
Penny signed all the contracts and release forms before leaving, her knees still shaking. Thankful that she hadn't been scheduled at the Cheesecake Factory for Sunday, she would have plenty of time to memorize her lines. On the drive back to Pasadena she enjoyed the excellent climate-control in Leonard's car. The AC in her car had never worked and it felt like a real luxury to be bathed in the cool air on a stifling day. She pulled up to her building just as Leonard and Sheldon were getting out of her car, and Sheldon took the opportunity to confront her: "this car is a death trap...the smiley sticker over the check-engine light isn't fooling anyone."
"Nice to see you too Sheldon," she answered smiling, "hi Leonard, thank you so much for switching with me...could we do this again on Monday?"
"Of course...I told you anytime; and by the way, your AC works now. It was just a fuse...I actually fixed it myself. Just watch out that it doesn't overheat with the added strain on the engine," he informed her.
