Big Bang Theory - Penny Pays the Bill

A fictional story about fictional characters.

*****

Penny couldn't wait, and even knowing full well she was tempting the wrath of Dr. Sheldon Cooper, she ran across the hall from her apartment and burst through the doorway of 4A without so much as a tap on the door. Sure enough, Sheldon jerked his long neck in her direction, scowled, and began his anticipated tirade, "in what alternate universe is it permissible to enter an abode without knocking."

The object of her unannounced visit, her boyfriend Dr. Leonard Hofstadter, was sitting at the desk closest to the door and immediately came to her defense, "how many times do I have to tell you: Penny has a standing invitation from me...she doesn't have to knock...ever. You are one crazy fruitcake."

"I'm not crazy...my mother had me tested," Sheldon softly answered.

"Yeah, so you say, but I've never seen the documented results," Leonard responded with a chuckle.

Smiling, Penny added, "you are one whackadoodle praying mantis, Moonpie."

He did indeed resemble the mentioned insect as his Ichabod Crane-like body hunched over his laptop, and he told her, "you know only my Meemaw calls me Moonpie."

"Why don't you like me Sheldon," Penny inquired with a puzzled look on her face.

"My personal feelings have no impact on this situation," he responded, "I am merely attempting to maintain some semblance of decorum and propriety. An orderly society must have rules and procedures."

He returned his attention to his laptop and she leaned forward and gave Leonard a quick peck on his cheek. "I couldn't wait to tell you the exciting news," she began, "do you remember the film I was in with Jason Statham?"

"Of course," Leonard grinned, "the one where you stole the film with your scene."

It was far from the truth, but she knew in his heart he meant it, and she loved him for it. "Well, not quite," Penny continued, "but I just got off the phone with the casting director of his new movie...they didn't even go through my agent...and he has personally requested that I be in it."

"See," Leonard assured her, "I told you...he recognizes talent when he is confronted with it." Leonard swung his desk chair around and Penny plopped down in his lap, wrapping her arm around his neck.

"Well, whatever the reason, I have an appointment with her on Thursday in Compton to discuss the part...no audition required. Soooo, I have a favor to ask," she smiled seductively at him.

"You know where the bowl is," Leonard said, reading her thoughts, "switch keys anytime you like. You know you don't have to ask." Leonard and Sheldon had a bowl on a table by the door where they always tossed their house and car keys. Leonard had informed her on several occasions that they could switch cars any time she needed to.

She kissed his cheek again, saying, "you are the sweetest man I have ever met."

Eavesdropping on their conversation, Sheldon exclaimed, "now wait a minute...does this mean I'll have to ride to work in her deathtrap vehicle."

"Of course not," Leonard winked at Penny, "you are more than welcome to take the bus."

"Ha ha," Sheldon replied, staring at Leonard with an exasperated look.

"Moonpie," Penny added, "you don't have to worry...the check-engine light isn't on any more."

"Oh right," Sheldon asked, "I suppose you put another smiley-face sticker over it...and only my Meemaw calls me Moonpie."

Hugging Leonard, she answered, "no, my knight in shining armor had it fixed...it just isn't very trustworthy for long trips."

"Knight...yeah right...June 21st maybe," Sheldon scoffed.

Penny looked befuddled, and Leonard explained, "that's just Sheldon's supposed sense of humor; making fun of my height. June 21st is the first day of Summer...the shortest night of the year."

Sheldon snorted; his version of a laugh; and Penny just hugged Leonard's neck even tighter, "don't you dare make fun of my little Ewok."

"Ewoks are short in stature, you know," Sheldon asserted, wanting to make sure she knew she was proving his point.

"No, they're cute and cuddly," Penny cooed as she nuzzled Leonard's neck.

Wednesday evening after an extra day shift at the Cheesecake Factory, Penny unlocked the door to 4B and flopped down on the sofa, kicked her shoes off and let out a big, sigh. She was beat. The past two days had been double shifts and she just needed to crash, but with her audition the next day, she also needed a shower. Involuntarily grunting as she stood up, she peeled off her waitress uniform as she trudged toward the bathroom; leaving a trail of dirty clothes as she went. Deciding on a relaxing bath instead of a shower, mainly because she wanted to lie down and get off her tired feet instead of stand, she turned on the faucets and finished undressing.

Adding some strawberry scented bath oil to the steaming water and placing a folded towel at the end of the tub for a pillow, she eased her magnificent naked body into the toasty water. "Ohhhhh," she groaned as her body seemed to melt in the soothing bath, and all her muscles relaxed. Grasping her loofah and a bottle of body wash, she gently, but thoroughly, scrubbed every inch of her body. Using the body wash for lubrication, she meticulously shaved her underarms and pubic mound until they were as smooth as her perfectly round butt cheeks. When she was satisfied that she was perfectly presentable for her interview, she lay her head against the towel. Looking down, Penny had to laugh when she saw that the only parts of her body that broke the surface of the soothing water were her gumdrop sized nipples. "I wonder how Leonard would like this view," she smiled as she shut her eyes.

Some time later, her body shivered her awake and she was suddenly panicked, not knowing how long she was asleep. Judging by the fact that the water was still tepid, she reasoned that it hadn't been that long, so she pulled the plug, stood and turned on the shower head to rinse off and wash her luxurious blond hair. Stepping out of the tub, Penny used a fluffy towel to pat herself dry, then smoothed moisturizer over every inch of her magnificent body; all the while wishing that Leonard was doing the honors. Wrapping a towel-turban around her hair and throwing on her favorite pink shorts and Hello Kitty tank top, she intended to grab a bottle of water and throw herself onto the couch.

Suddenly she realized she hadn't exchanged keys with Leonard and headed across the hall. Deliberately knocking twice and opening the door, Penny saw Sheldon sitting in "his spot" on the couch and before he could open his mouth, she greeted him, "hi Sheldon, don't mind me...just exchanging keys with Leonard." She hadn't given a second thought to the time of day, immediately seeing that it was dinner time in 4A and that all four nerds were present.

She instantly regretted not wrapping a robe around her when she heard the smarmy Howard Wolowitz greet her, "hubba, hubba...I'll be happy to give you a ride...if you know what I mean." Her nipples were noticeably poking against her skimpy, damp shirt and had the attention of every male in the room...with the exception of Sheldon.

Raj was smiling widely when she replied, "not in a million years Howard...hi Raj."

"Howard, knock it off," Leonard defended her as he sprang to his feet and bounded to the door to meet her. He fished his keys out of the bowl and handed them to her as she dropped hers into it. "Good luck tomorrow," he grinned as he boldly kissed her cheek, and added, "jeez you smell good."

"Thanks sweetie," Penny answered, and put her arms around his neck while planting her lips on his. She could almost feel his chest swell at this intimate display of affection in front of his friends.

"I suppose you'll be joining us for dinner," Sheldon commented dryly.

Separating from Leonard, Penny sarcastically replied, "sorry to disappoint you, but I'm exhausted and I have a big day tomorrow. Thanks for the invitation though...maybe tomorrow."

As she left the apartment, smiling she could hear Sheldon protesting, "wait...what invitation...why would I be disappointed."

Thursday morning Penny selected one of her favorite pale blue print dresses to wear to the interview, along with her "lucky" purple thong. Wanting to make an impression, she decided against wearing a bra so that the "twins" could swing freely and exude sex appeal. Her five inch light blue heels made her incredible legs seem taut and endlessly long. Always keeping her makeup to a minimum, she confidently left her apartment with plenty of time to spare. Getting into Leonard's car she saw a small baggie with a short note attached. It read, "To Hollywood's newest star; just a little something to keep your energy high," and it was signed "Leonard."

The Ziploc was filled with green grapes...washed and stripped from the stems...small, but loving details she noticed this time. "I love you, you sweet man," she whispered aloud as she slid the key into the ignition, and smiled during the entire forty minute ride to Compton.

Leonard's GPS directed her right to the front door of an impressive, shiny multistory office building and she quickly located the casting director's office on the list in the lobby. Penny was happy that it was not the same casting director as Jason Statham's last film...he had been a complete pig. His name was Franz and he and the sleazy Producer had demanded blow-jobs in return for the part. This time the casting director was a woman, and Penny practically floated to her office.

There was no one else in the waiting room and she was ushered into the inner office almost immediately. The name on the door had been Alisha Braun and the woman greeting her reminded Penny of a stern librarian. She wore a trim gray skirt-suit and sensible heels, with her brunette hair drawn back into a tight bun. Penny was already intimidated when the woman reached her arm out, shook her hand and suggested she sit in the nice leather chair in front of the desk. "I'm sure you noticed my name on the door," she began, "please call me Alisha. I am the casting director for the production company backing Mr. Statham's latest film."

"Let me explain why you are here instead of taking part in the normal auditions. Mr. Statham's last film was a rather low budget affair that ended up making triple the profits that were expected. He seems to think that the unscripted fight scene that you were inadvertently a part of was a big reason for the popularity, and as such he feels like you are some sort of muse." Penny had no idea what that was but figured she could Google it later...it had to be a good thing or she wouldn't be there. "Consequently, he has requested that you be included in his new venture. He has specified that it be a speaking part so that you will be making the top wage scale. You will have several simple lines that I'm sure even an inexperienced actress can handle."

Penny was forming a strong dislike for Alisha because of her condescending attitude, but held her tongue as Alisha handed her a few pages of the script with her lines highlighted. Her part was that of a hotel front-desk clerk, who greeted Statham's character with the lines, " welcome back Mr. Steele," and while handing him the key-card, "your usual suite...we hope you enjoy your stay," and then suggestively, "if there is anything you desire to make your stay more enjoyable, I will see to it personally." Later in the film she hands him a set of car keys while saying, " your car is parked out front Mr. Steele." Immediately after handing him the keys, a gun battle breaks out in the hotel lobby.

"You will be dressed similarly to my attire," Alisha continued, "very business-like and austere. The wardrobe department will need your measurements. When you leave, the receptionist will have all your paperwork prepared: your contract, W-4 form, shooting schedule and anything else you may need. The sound-stage is about a half mile from here. I can't imagine that you will be needed on set for more than a couple days, at most. Do you have any questions?"

Wanting to jump up and pump her fist in the air with excitement, Penny tried to maintain her composure and answered, "no I believe you have covered everything." She couldn't believe it was really happening: she was getting a part on a major movie with one of the fastest rising stars in the business...and all without an audition...and no nudity...and no casting-couch hanky-panky!"

Feeling she was being dismissed, Penny rose to leave when she felt Alisha's hand on her arm. "There is just one more thing," Alisha stated as she directed Penny to be seated again. The casting director leaned back against the front of the desk and quite deliberately began to pull the hem of her skirt up her lengthy legs. She was wearing thigh-high stockings instead of pantyhose and soon revealed that she was panty-less as well. Penny's mouth opened involuntarily and she was temporarily speechless as she stared at the untamed brunette jungle between Alisha's thighs, only inches from her face.

Stammering in shock, Penny inquired, "wait...what...I... I thought Jason asked for me."

Smugly replying, Alisha told her, "that is true; but I could always tell Mr. Statham that you were unavailable. He would never question it. Now, let's see how badly you want this part...see if you can put a smile on my face."

Her spirits suddenly dampened, Penny knew she had little choice as she slid out of the chair and onto her knees between Alisha's spread legs. Her skirt was now bunched around her waist as she stared sternly down at the beautiful blonde face in her crotch. Penny looked up at the not-unattractive German casting director and was reminded of the cover photos in the adult section of the video store that depicted a typical dominatrix...the only thing missing was a riding crop. Knowing her fate was determined, Penny sat back on her calves, began to run her hands up Alisha's legs to her thighs, and closed her eyes. "Oh no," Alisha commanded, " I want to see those gorgeous green eyes while you're pleasing me."

Penny's thumbs brushed against the generous bush as she struggled to find the hidden slit and Alisha's scent of arousal was immediately evident. "At least she smells clean," Penny thought, leaning forward until her face was only a couple inches from her target. Finding her mound, Penny kept brushing curly hair aside to clear a path as Alisha's legs began to twitch in anticipation. Separating the meaty mound, Penny discovered that hidden beneath the dense brown forest were a pair of very lengthy lips, already glistening with natural juices. Prying her apart even farther with her thumbs, Penny leaned in thinking, "well here goes nothing...I hope this part is worth it." Not really wanting to lick the pubic jungle, Penny went straight to the slit and drew her tongue upward from the bottom to the top. She pressed her tongue against the opening until it was flat and wide against Alisha's gap.

Every few minutes she would glance up at her subject, making sure Alisha could see her eyes while she licked. Penny was quite inexperienced at cunnilingus, but a friend had once told her to "just do what you would want done to you," so she continued to lick while using her tongue to probe Alisha's hole. Alisha's bare ass writhed against the desktop as Penny inserted first one index finger into her pussy, and then added the other. She began to finger-fuck the statuesque brunette while still lapping at her opening. Looking up she saw Alisha close her eyes, and her knuckles turn white from gripping the edge of the desk to tightly. Penny took this as her cue to pinch the nub of her clit between her thumbs.

She was rewarded when Alisha's thighs clamped together, trapping Penny's hands, and her entire body twitched as she groaned, "ohhh...yessss...right there you bitch." Penny smiled to herself; congratulating herself on a job well done, assuming her ordeal was over. As Alisha relaxed against the front of the desk, Penny withdrew her fingers and surreptitiously wiped them on the plush carpet. The satisfied casting director tugged her skirt down into place and watched as Penny sat back in her chair, dug a tissue from her purse, and thoroughly wiped her face. Without any sort of acknowledgment of what had just transpired, she dismissed Penny: "don't forget to fill out all your paperwork on your way out...Jeanne will have it all ready for you. Good luck with the part."

Before stopping at the receptionist's desk, Penny made a quick trip to the restroom where she washed her face and hands. Walking back to Leonard's car, her knees felt wobbly but she also felt a sense of pride...she had done what was necessary and now had a part in a big budget movie. Tossing her script into the passenger seat, she grabbed the bag of grapes, thinking, "you dear sweet man...you will never know how much I needed these. I need to get a certain taste out of my mouth." She smiled all the way to Pasadena.

Arriving at her building, Penny smiled again when she noticed that it just happened to be dinner time, and she was actually looking forward to Sheldon's sarcasm when she went to tell Leonard the good news. Opening the door to 4A and dropping Leonard's keys into the bowl, she beat Sheldon to the punch by announcing to the room, "guess who just got a part in Jason Statham's latest film?"

Sheldon quickly remarked, "not that it's any substitute for proper entrance etiquette, but I'll play along...who?"

Leonard immediately jumped up and down while advancing to greet her, "I knew it...didn't I tell you she would nail it, Raj. I am so proud of you." He hugged her tightly and when he released her, she wished he hadn't stopped.

"And guess what," she added, "my shirt stays on."

"Damn," Howard interjected, looking very disappointed.

Leonard walked into the kitchen area and began to put food on a plate for her, saying, "I won't take no for an answer...you're staying for dinner."

"I would love to have dinner with my favorite peeps," she answered, "especially my absolute favorite." She winked at Leonard and he actually blushed. "Let me guess, it's Thursday so it must be pizza from Giacomo's. Sausage, mushrooms and light olives."

"Wow, you're good," Leonard congratulated her.

"Yes," Sheldon sarcastically but-in, "maybe she should be my roommate. Leonard forgot the mushrooms."

"How many times do I have to tell you, I ordered them but they forgot to put them on. When I noticed it they gave me the mushrooms on the side," Leonard frustratingly blurted out. He handed Penny her plate and a bottle of water and she squeezed his knee as he sat beside her.

"I never would have figured you for a pizza fan, Sheldon," Penny commented, "you know, all that food mixed together."

"On the contrary," Sheldon answered, "it is my favorite form of food: a round object, cut in triangular pieces, and comes in a square box."

"Hmmm," she responded, "what about Sicilian...you know; square, square, and square."

"Oh no," Sheldon disagreed, "not imaginative enough, and besides I've never been a fan of foods named for geographic regions. That's one of the reasons I'm not a big chowder fan."

The next day Penny passed Leonard in the stairway of their building and he shyly asked her, "ummm...if you're not doing anything tonight, would you like to come over?"

"There is absolutely nothing I would rather do," she honestly told him, "what do you have planned?"

"It's a surprise," he answered, and she was sure he blushed; peaking her interest for the rest of the day. He did indeed have plans that she never would have guessed. Leonard loved Penny with all his heart, and he believed her when she said she felt the same way, but thanks to his mother's parenting skills, he was the king of insecurity. He wasn't used to anyone caring about him, and still felt undeserved. His insecurity was further fueled knowing that Penny was becoming more well known as an actress, and she was being exposed to many rich and handsome actors. He knew she was way out of his league, and felt he needed to step up his game...spice things up.