(Fictional story about fictional characters)
***
Leonard and Penny were on their way home from dropping his roommate Dr. Sheldon Cooper off at the airport. Sheldon had been forced by CalTech to use some of his accrued vacation time, so he had decided to fly back to Texas to visit his family (especially his beloved MeeMaw) during the holiday season. Penny and Leonard were excited at the prospect of having some "alone" time; and some "without-Sheldon" time because had been especially annoying lately...even more so than usual. Suddenly Penny had an inspiration: "let's pick up a tree and have a decorating party."
"That's a great idea," Leonard agreed, "having Sheldon gone is enough to celebrate, but your idea legitimizes it. We can invite our friends...and ask them to bring an ornament for the tree."
"Ooo, ooo, I know," Penny giggled excitedly, "we can ask everyone to bring a DVD of their favorite holiday movie, and a blanket, and make it an all night party."
"Yeah, and ask them to chip in with something to drink or eat," Leonard suggested. Penny was already sending texts to their friends when Leonard spied a Christmas tree lot and pulled over.
By the time they had dragged the five foot Fraser Fir up the three flights of stairs to Apartment 4A, Leonard was ready to pull out his inhaler, "give me five minutes and we'll put the tree in the stand so it will be all ready for tomorrow night." It took them about an hour to get the tree straight in the tree-stand and Leonard remarked, "you know this would have really annoyed me except for three magic words...Sheldon's not here!"
"I know," Penny agreed, sitting on the floor looking up at the bare tree, "he would have set there in his spot and given directions the whole time without ever lifting a finger...we deserve this break."
Sitting around their table in the lunchroom at CalTech the next day, Leonard and his friends were discussing the tree decorating party. "So Sheldon won't be there," Raj Koothrappali asked.
"Nope, he's in Texas," Leonard assured him.
"That's good...he's been super annoying lately," Raj offered.
"I know...I don't know what his problem is," Leonard said.
"It's funny...I haven't noticed a difference," Howard Wolowitz stated, "he's always super annoying. So who's coming tonight?"
"Well, besides you guys and Bernadette, we invited Stuart and Penny invited Will Wheaton, since they're working on that movie together."
"Oh right...Serial Apeist 2," Howard spoke up, "can't wait to see it."
"There's no shower scene in this one," Leonard informed him with a stern look.
"Damn," Howard pouted.
As they were talking, Barry Kripke walked by and overheard their conversation, "pah-ty...did I hear something about a pah-ty...what time should I be they-ah." The three friends just looked at each other speechless as Barry added, "they-ah might be some avai-wabah time on the new compu-tah for my f-wiends ."
Howard was the first to speak: "Christmas tree trimming party at Leonard's tonight. Bring an ornament, a holiday movie and some food...it might be an all-nighter...oh and Sheldon is away."
Leonard just glared at Howard as Kripke answered, "I'wah be they-ah...no Coo-pah...too bad...what about his femawah f-wend."
"No, Amy took advantage of Sheldon's trip to go visit her mother," Raj informed him.
"Why did you do that," Leonard wanted to know when Kripke had gone.
"Hey, free time on the super-computer," Howard replied, "it doesn't hurt to have that favor in the bank for future use...besides, he's not that bad...he makes me look good."
Leonard and Penny went all out for the tree trimming party, even buying a four foot sub sandwich that they cut up into small lengths. Penny had picked up two gallons of Lactaid eggnog so that even Leonard could partake of the holiday classic; along with three bottles of rum to spike it. "That's the only reason anyone ever drinks eggnog," she explained, "without the rum it's horrible." Bags of chips and bowls of onion dip were placed on the kitchen counter along with the ubiquitous clear plastic tumblers adorned with red and green holly prints. She had not been pleased when Leonard told her that Kripke was coming: "he's just sooo creepy...worse than Howard, especially since he started dating Bernadette."
"Hey, don't blame me," Leonard explained, "save your wrath for Howard...he's the sycophant...always kissing up. There's only one person I kiss up to," and he grinned from ear to ear.
"Yeah that's right, and don't you ever change," Penny laughed as she playfully slapped his butt. "Nice jammies, by the way," she complimented him. Everyone had texted back and forth and finally agreed to wear comfy, festive pajamas to the over-nighter. Leonard's were a Christmas Star Wars flannel that she had given him as an early gift. Penny had chosen an over-sized Grinch t-shirt over black leggings.
Leonard had noticed that her ample breasts were wobbling freely every time she moved, her gumrop nipples threatening to poke through the material, and asked, "I know you wanted to be comfortable, but I have to know...are you completely commando?"
"Play your cards right, my little Ewok, and you'll find out," she winked.
Unfortunately, Barry Kripke was the first to show up and when he took off his coat he revealed his black satin pajamas. The disconcerting thing was that the bottoms were shorts, and there was just something uncomfortable about his pasty white legs. Penny couldn't help notice that there was no definition to them; they were just straight up and down. "Hey Wen-ard...wookin' good Penny," he announced, "I bwought a bottle of wum."
"Woo hoo, we're drowning in rum," Penny exclaimed, "what movie did you bring."
"Bad Santa," he smiled, "nothing says Cwistmas like stwippahs and midgets.
"I believe they prefer Little People," Penny offered.
"Hey when they gwow up they can make the wules," Kripke chuckled at his attempt at a joke. He immediately plopped down in Sheldon's spot on the sofa and began to stare at Penny's chest as her breasts flopped around inside her t-shirt. Luckily, almost instantly, Bernadette, Howard, Raj and Stuart came through the door. It was obvious that satin or silk was the choice of material for the overnight party. Howard and Bernadette had shared two pair of pj's; one red and the other green. Howard was wearing the green top and red bottoms, and Bernadette was of course the reverse...they really looked cute.
Removing any doubt, Howard stated, "they're real silk...they feel so sexy against the skin." Penny thought that was obvious because, even though she was wearing a bra of some kind, Bernadette's nipples were clearly visible.
"We brought a veggie platter to munch on and some OJ and vodka," Bernedette squeaked, "covered all bases."
"Thanks," Penny took the tray, "what movies did you pick?"
"I have my all-time favorite:" It's A Wonderful Life," Bernie said, "and Howie...well, you tell 'em."
"Die Hard," Howard grinned, "and before you say anything...it IS a Christmas movie...remember the Christmas party at the Nakatomi Plaza."
"He's got you there," Leonard high-fived Howard, "great movie."
Penny almost giggled when she saw Raj...he reminded her of old pictures she had seen of Hugh Hefner at the Playboy Mansion. He, of course, had dark red silk (she was going to assume they were silk and not satin) pajamas under what could only be described as an old fashioned "smoking jacket" tied with a belt, just like "Hef" used to wear. Seeing the stifled look on her face, Raj spoke up, "these are genuine Indian silk...my Mommy sent them to me. They are soooo smooth." Placing a Costco bag on the counter, Raj told them , "I brought a couple boxes of microwave popcorn...both buttered, and kettle...and a bottle of rum."
Stuart sheepishly put a paper bag on the counter and when Leonard looked inside it contained about a half-dozen red and white swirled peppermint sticks...the really thick, heavy kind. They were about a foot long and at least an inch thick. He was sure they had been in a Star Wars cup on Stuart's counter at the comic book shop for sale last Christmas for a dollar apiece, but everyone knew business hadn't been very good at the shop so no one cared if Stuart brought anything or not. Leonard emptied them out on the counter and declared, "thanks Stuart...very festive. Did you bring a movie?"
Producing a DVD from the pocket of his coat, it read A Very Smurfy Christmas, and everyone laughed (in a nice way...not derisively). "It's a classic," Stuart announced smiling, "99 cents in the Walmart bargain bin."
"Very nice Stuart," Bernadette told him, "Penny, what movies did you and Leonard pick?"
Penny held up a copy of the true classic Holiday Inn and said, "hey, it's got a farm in it...reminds me of home." Leonard tossed a DVD of Elf onto the coffee table.
"Ooo, I see where you can relate," Howard teased.
"May I remind you that when I stand next to you and Bernadette, I feel like a giant," Leonard teased right back.
"Really...a half inch taller," Howard joked.
"Still taller," Leonard added.
"He makes up for it in other areas," Penny mumbled, having already sampled from the pitcher of spiked eggnog. Leonard stuck his tongue out at Howard and kissed Penny on the cheek, "thank you."
There was a knock on the door and Wil Wheaton entered carrying a Costco bag, "sorry I'm late. I was at the store getting a bottle of rum when I saw a couple buying a copy of Stand By Me, from the bargain bin if you can believe it, and of course they fawned all over me and wanted my autograph."
"Seriously, they recognized you," Raj inquired.