All of the events in this story are totally fictional, which means, for those who never paid attention in class, that they never, ever happened.
So many words were going through my head. I had just spent the night with the beautiful Morena Baccarin, after having one Hell of a series of bad days, only to walk out of said woman's apartment to see a face I never wanted to even think of again, the face of my former best friend, Mila Kunis. Somehow, three words managed to come to mind. "WHAT THE FUCK?"
"Jake, please," Mila said, putting her hands gently on my shoulders. "Calm down."
"Don't worry," I said, calmly removing her hands from my body. "I won't give you the satisfaction of causing a scene. Now, for my first, VERY calm question, why the blue Hell are you here, looking me in the face?"
"Well, if you're asking if I came looking for you, the answer's no. I was just walking by to get a cup of coffee. If you're asking why I'm in New York, you know that I have a place here, and during the summer I spend time here."
"So you weren't looking for me?"
"I was going to eventually, but not right now. I thought you'd be at Kyle's."
"Naw naw. I mean I live there, but I wouldn't have...wait, why the Hell am I even talking to you? Do us both a favor Ms. Kunis, and leave me the fuck alone." I began to walk away, when Mila grabbed me by the arm.
"Jake, just wait a second. Let me at least tell you something. Please, after over 13 years, you owe me. Please."
"...Fine," I said. Even after everything, if she really needed something, I couldn't say no.
"Let's go to that coffee shop I was heading to, sit in a booth, and just let me talk, okay?"
**************
"Well, you got your coffee, and we're sitting, so talk," I said sternly to Mila, looking at her coldly from my seat.
"Don't waste any time do you?" she asked, trying to get some kind of response from me. I just continued to stare at her. "Wow, tough crowd. Well, let me just get down to it then, but I NEED you to stay till I'm finished, okay?"
"Fine," I replied. "So talk Kunis."
"All right, here it goes. Jake, I'm sorry. I know that doesn't fix what happened. I know it doesn't put you and Elisha back together, I know it doesn't fix things between you and I. But when you and Elisha began dating essentially because of me, and when you two began to fall hard for each other, it tore me apart inside. I never even knew I had these feelings for you, and frankly, I don't really know if they were real, or just something fueled by jealousy, or something else. All I know is that I was your best friend. You were happier then you'd ever been in your life, and I decided that I couldn't have that. I know that no matter how much I apologize, things can't be fixed, not between you and her, between you and Dyl, and especially between you and me....." As she finished, she began to trail into a cry, a tear rolling down her right cheek as she began to softly sob.
As much as I wanted to just let her sit there alone, stew in what she'd done, I couldn't. Like the movie says, ‘I may be an asshole, but I'm not a fucking asshole.', so I went to her side of the booth, and hugged her, let her cry into my shoulder. "Hey, come on now Kunis," I said to her, stroking her hair. "No need for tears. Come on, quit it. You're gonna make me feel guilty and other bad stuff for being mad at you."
"But Jake..." she sniffled. "You have every right to be mad."
"Oh yeah, I know. And I still am. I still want to punch Dyl square in the damn throat. I'm still fuming at you. None of that means I want to see you cry. Doesn't mean you're my exactly my favorite person again either though."
"Jake, you think there's any way, any way at all we can be friends again? I know the damage to what we had is big, bigger then I probably even realize, but is there a shot?"
"I don't know Mila, I really don't. Despite how FUCKED you and Dyl helped make my life, I can't just throw away 13 years. Then again, I also can't overlook what I lost."
"Jake, I'm so sorry about Eli..."
"Just..don't even bring her into this. I'm done with her, and she's made things clear about how she feels about me. But as for you and I, if we can get close to how we were, we'll have to take it slow. We both fucked things up. I am very willing to admit it."
"I think I can deal with that Jake. But why are you so willing to forgive?"
"Two reasons. A. You're my best friend. I try to shrug it off, but we both know that's true. You're too big a part of my life to just write you off. And B. Anything to get you to stop blubbering. I mean come on kid. No one's cuttin' onions."
"Well, if we're gonna start off slow, you wanna start off today?"
"No Mila. I do want to try and rebuild things, but like I said, slow. Today was a good first step. But right now, I need to go to my place, and sort things out in my head a bit. I'll call you on your cell later, okay?"
"Okay. And thank you Jake."
"Don't thank me. Thank years of comic book reading, corrupting me into an honest guy."
************
Upon walking away from the coffee shop, numerous thoughts began to enter my mind. Was I letting Mila off the hook too easily? Did I even really mean a word of what I said back there, or was I just trying to be a nice guy? Could I even trust her at all? These questions did nothing but bounce around my head like a rubber ball, and no good answers came to mind. As I hopped in a cab and rode back to the apartment, I still had no answers. I'd talk to Josie, but around this time she was always very busy, so that'd be no luck. And Morena, well, even though we had a lot of fun the previous night, I couldn't unload all this onto her. And Kyle still didn't know what had gone on in California. So I was screwed, no one to talk this over with. But just as I arrived at the apartment, my cell began to ring again.
"Hello," I said into the phone.
"Well hellooooooo Mr. Parker," Laura said via phone. "I've just landed pally, and it sounds like you and I have some serious talking to do."
"Damn, news travels fast Red," I said into the phone. "You sound pissed though."
"You just have some explaining to do Jake, that's all. Meet me at JFK, all right?"
"You got it." I heard a click and then folded my phone. What had her so pissed?
***********
I called Laura back up to get what gate she'd be at, but she told me to just meet her at baggage claim. She still sounded pissed off. And for the life of me, I couldn't figure out why.
I arrived at the airport and headed to baggage claim. I waited a few minutes, and saw her walk up to me. "Hey Red," I said to her with a smile and a hug, which was barely returned.
"You and me, we have to talk," she said sternly. "NOW." I picked up her bags and followed her to a waiting limo. "Get in." After I put her stuff in the trunk, I got in, and she followed. "Got the strangest phone call when I got in Jake. You'll never believe who it was."
"I think I have a good idea," I said. She had to be talking about Mila. But why would she be pissed? Wouldn't she want Mila and I to make up?
"It was Elisha Jake. Sobbing, crying over the phone. Saying she tried to talk to you, but you just yelled and snapped, and told her to never ever call you again. She was crying big time Jake. Now, here's what gets me. I tell you she wants to get back together, I tell you how bad she feels, and when she calls, THAT'S when you decide to let her have it? Did you know I told her it'd be a good idea for her to call you, that you wanted to talk? Now this happens, shit, what the fuck is wrong with you?"
"Whoa whoa whoa Red, Elisha definitely didn't tell you the whole story then."
"Well, I have to hear this then." So I went on and told her. I told her about how JUST after she called to tell me all this, that Behind The Scenes Special came on. I told her about the film crew member, and what was done and said on screen. "I see. So, because she acts childish, you act like it too?"
"No Red. But frankly, I'm fucking tired of playing games. If she really felt like you said she did, what was with Mr. Grip Dipshit?"
"Like I said, childish shit, like you running away from your problems instead of facing them down."
"Low blow Red. Real fuckin' low."
