I hate when I get myself into situations like this. On this day, untangling some power cords forced me to crawl under my desk just as I heard footsteps enter my office.
"Jim?" I heard Jeff Murphy's voice.
I sat up quick and promptly banged my head on the desk.
After grumbling some choice words I got up and fell back into my office chair, rubbing my head.
"Does it hurt?" he meekly asked.
I gave him a look that spoke volumes.
"Only when I laugh, what's up?"
"Small favor I need to ask of you," he said as he closed the door behind him "and if you refuse, I'll understand."
That got my attention, I could actually say "no" to something? I mean, meetings with Jeff Murphy in his office were an everyday occurrence. A meeting with him in my office was another story, especially when it was unplanned.
"...But I'll also remember your answer when Holiday bonus time comes around."
Well, so much for saying no.
"Remember Gary Mackas? The man behind that little part of the business we didn't talk about?"
I thought for a minute, and then remembered the brief meeting I had with him awhile back. I remembered Gary was a little obnoxious but understood how he'd been important to the early success of Artists Unlimited, and I also remembered someone with him that day named Laura.
"Uh-huh" I nodded.
"He's calling in a favor and wants someone to photograph a show of his."
"What kind of show?"
Jeff started to stride around my office, idly looking at the photos on the wall
"Well, I wouldn't call it a show; it's more of an appearance by his Calendar Girls."
Jeff turned back to see me staring at my watch.
"Having problems with your watch?"
"No, I was just looking at the date on my fake Rolex and it's nowhere near December."
"Very funny, he calls them the Calendar Girls but it'll be posters and photos they're signing, that sorta stuff. He sent a stack to the troops overseas and it's his way of thanking them."
"How could he do that? Don't they have, like, Islamic laws against that?"
"Well, with this guy, where there's a will, he finds a way."
I looked at him skeptically.
"Uh-huh."
"Oh, come on! Think of it as a Tigress show without Tigress."
"That doesn't make sense."
"You'll get paid double your usual rate."
"That makes sense, where am I going?"
"Ah! That's the really interesting part. You get to go down to Camp Pendleton. Semper Fi, Hollywood!" he said, adding a jaunty salute.
Well, I guess it beats some strip club or car dealer in the Valley.
"Transportation will be provided, you ship out at 0900, Soldier."
"Aye-aye, sir" I replied with a lopsided salute of my own.
So that would be my adventure for the weekend. Saturday morning, I had my photo gear ready to go and was grabbing some last minute things when I heard a car pulling up. I looked out the window and saw a white Cadillac Escalade in the driveway. As I came downstairs, at the door were three ladies, when they saw me, their eyes lit up.
"Hi, Hollywood!" they all said in a giggly chorus.
The trio consisted of a gorgeous blonde who looked like she'd just dropped off her surfboard before coming here, an exotic Latina lady, and a brunette whom I knew all too well, Laura Austin.
Laura immediately came inside and hugged me.
"Hey babe!" turning to the blonde she said "This is Chrissie, and that's Stacy." She said as she pointed to the Latina beauty.
Each one gave me a hug and were all dressed in some kind of t-shirt and shorts combo.
"OK, ladies...uh, that's Smokie over there." I said pointing to my cat, who gave them a look of bored amusement as they all immediately began to fawn over him.
"So you're running this little trip?" I said to Laura.
"Right!" she said before looking at me "You're not wearing that are you?"
"What's wrong with it?" I said as I looked over my polo shirt and jeans combo.
"Everything, come on girls this man needs a makeover." She led the girls and me upstairs and began to rifle through my closet.
"Man, he needs a style overhaul." Chrissie said.
"I know. I should've taken him shopping when I had the chance." Laura said idly as they looked in the closet.
"Ah! This is a start!" Chrissie said as she found a colorful Hawaiian shirt.
"What are you gonna be wearing?" I asked, what else could I do?
"We're not the ones clothing challenged, Jim." Laura said as she looked for a good pair of sneakers "Yes! These will do fine."
She tossed me a pair of checkerboard Vans slip-on sneakers that nearly hit me in the head. They'd been a promo gift from a client and I forgot even had them.
"What about these?" Stacy said in a little girl-like voice as she held up a pair of green cargo shorts.
"Perfect!" Chrissie said "Perfect for the Marines."
"Aren't you supposed to be respectful at a place like this?" I said.
"Oh, come on! These guys like to party and that's what we're gonna do." Laura said
"They deserve it!" Chrissie echoed.
"Right, now double-time it Hollywood! We gotta hit the road!" Laura said as she led the others out.
"We've got some of America's finest waiting for us." Stacy said with a laugh as they went back downstairs.
I think they're serious.
I got dressed, again, and outside was their Escalade. Bright white with ultra-tinted windows, it looked nice.
"OK, ladies, let's invade the halls of Montezuma and the shores of Tripoli." I said as I climbed inside. Stacy was driving with Laura alongside; Chrissie was in the back with me.
"This is a pretty sweet ride you've got." I said to Stacy.
"Actually it belongs to my boyfriend." She replied "He thinks I'm helping a friend move today."
"If he only knew!" Chrissie laughed.
"Oh! My god! He'd be so jealous!" Laura laughed.
"So what's the story on this party, anyway?" I asked as we got on the highway.
"Colonel Parker's battalion just arrived home from Afghanistan and he's giving a big party for them."
"Colonel Parker?"
"Save your energies, Jim" Laura said idly from the front seat "He's heard every joke you can think of."
