Author's Note-Thanks again for your patience, Hollywood Jim has had several adventures lately that will be on here soon. Fans of this series will notice this one cross references some other stories in the series as well as characters a spinoff series found elsewhere. Enjoy!
Artists Unlimited prided itself on being up on any newest technology that was out there. It went back to Chuck's software development days and it tied in to work we were doing with an electronics superstore called Odyssey Central.
All the top members of the company got a memo informing us of an upgrade to Apple IPhone's. Chuck wanted to "keep us on the cutting edge of technology" but we all knew he was just taking advantage of a perk from a client eager to keep us and our connections throughout the industry.
"Who's Marvin Garbonski?" I asked Jeff as I read the memo
Jeff didn't look up from his laptop screen, but I see a smile come over his face
"Oh, he's our tech support chief" he replied as he looked up "interesting guy"
"According to the memo I need to have him upgrade my phone. How come I can't go the Apple store and do that?"
"Because Chuck said so, that's why." He said without looking up
I went down to the subbasement of the building and found a door at the end of a long hallway with an imposing security panel on the side. My ID badge didn't open the door and I hit a buzzer which played a nautical whistle similar to what I used to hear on Star Trek.
"Report?" the voice inside said
"Uh, I'm here for the phone upgrade?"
"Proceed inside" and the door buzzed open
I entered a dimly lit room that was a maze of monitors, cables, humming hard drives and multi-colored lights. At a desk was hunched figure I could only see from the back who wore large headphones.
That must be Marvin, I thought
I walked up to the figure and tapped his shoulder. The figure slowly turned around and revealed itself to be a well-constructed mannequin, startling me.
"Yes?" said a figure that suddenly appeared out of the darkness
"Uh, the phone, phone upgrade" I stuttered
"Yes, excuse me Mr. Data" he said to the mannequin as he pushed it aside and sat down at a large computer terminal.
"What's with the mannequin?" I asked
"It's a security measure I use" he said idly as he began punching keys "keeps the software pirates at bay"
I now realized who he bore a strong, no, make that striking resemblance to.
"You know, I have to say you look so much like that guy on Big Bang Theory." I said with a smile, getting a stone faced look from Marvin in return "you know, Sheldon Cooper"
"On the contrary" he replied in the same tone as his TV alter ego "He looks and acts like me, he just won't admit it. His entire career is based on a lie, and he knows it."
"Humph" he grunted as he read the memo from Chuck "Apple IPhone, cannot believe they chose this for a phone instead of my choice. It would be the perfect answer to Steve Jobs' arrogance towards creative minds such as mine. Your phone, if you please."
I quickly handed him my AT&T issue phone
"Ancient technology...long outdated." he said as he examined it
"I just got it last year."
"You fell for it too?" he chuckled as his chair rolled over to his computer keyboard
"This company continually chooses to purchase technology that clearly shows no thought or imagination..." He said quickly as his fingers flew over the keyboard like he had 20 fingers instead of 10 "It's since become my job to know everything here, my burden as it were, to know all about how things work here, down to every animal, vegetable, mineral..."
"...you are the very model of a modern major general." I said in a singsong voice eliciting a stare of annoyance from him
"It's a joke." I said with a nervous chuckle
"Yes...you'll improve." he replied as his fingers went back to clicking a mile a minute
"Man, you should work for Microsoft."
Marvin stopped and started at me
"Oh, please...Bill Gates is beneath me, and he knows it."
This time, I said nothing
"You'll need to delete some materials on your phone, then come back and see me" he said in that same tone "Don't take too long, my time is limited here and I choose to use it wisely."
"Aye-aye sir." I said with a salute added
"I prefer the term 'acknowledged' or 'make it so" I feel that better clarifies my status within this organization. Good day."
With that he pushed backwards on his chair and disappeared into the dim light of the room, leaving me alone.
Needless to say, I got outta there, fast! I kept thinking some kind of super-computer beast he'd created was somewhere waiting to strike.
I made it to the elevators just as Jeff Murphy was getting on. He gave me the once over and chuckled.
"Spent some time with Marvin the Martian, huh?" he said without looking at me
"How could you tell?"
"Lucky guess."
I took a cleansing breath
"I feel like I just left the Twilight Zone." I said
Jeff continued to snicker
"You should've seen his last assistant."
"Oh?"
He looked at me and nodded
"He's living upstate now, really nice facility." he said as he looked down at some papers he held before turning to me "Last Christmas he sent me a potholder."
I went back to my office and started going through whatever could be deleted off the phone. I thought maybe I can get an edge on "the Martian" and just transfer everything to my laptop. I hooked up everything and watched as the photos began their slow transfer. It was a mix of candid shots on different photo jobs, me on planes with co-workers, looking jet-lagged. Surprisingly there were few shots of me with any of the ladies I'd been, shall we say, "friendly" with. The last photo was different.
It was a close up of me wearing my favorite NY Giants t-shirt.
And holding me close was Blake Lively.
