By now, Chris and I had seen our share of good photo projects (Paris) and bad (Rhianna, although in the end it worked out OK, but better for me) and now we got one that would fall in between the two. Chris got an assignment to do tour photos for an up and coming female duo called Tigress. They seemed to me like a 2 girl version of the Pussycat Dolls. But compared to these two, the Dolls truly were rocket scientists. When we were introduced to "Candy" and "Mandy" it was like they had just landed on earth and were now learning the language. They seemed to be all giggles and jiggles. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but even "Hollywood Jim" has his limits. The big bonus for us was that their debut shows would be in Las Vegas. And it was on a weekend when the Dolls were headlining in the same place. "What a coincidence." we both thought.
But Vegas is still Vegas, and we were all prepared for a wild weekend. The hotel was the brand new Painted Desert casino, right on the strip.
When our flight landed, we had a long wait for our luggage. Chris was starting to get nervous, as was I. The record company didn't spring for a private jet, so we were at the mercy of the airlines to have our stuff there. My eyes were strangely attracted to an overweight, seemingly plain-looking girl wearing a garish, mismatched pantsuit. Her hair was tightly wound into her floppy hat and she seemed to speak with a thick accent. Her luggage looked well-worn. She turned to see me and then turned away. Looked again, and did the same thing. I breathed a sigh of relief when our gear finally appeared. We gathered up our stuff but my eyes kept focusing on the mystery woman. Whose eyes followed us as we exited the terminal.
Our eyes glazed when we drove down the strip, with the top down on our convertible, tunes blasting, we were ready for action. It was tough for us to resist the urge to do everything in one night. We still had an assignment, paying big bucks too.
Chris spent the better part of the afternoon shooting the girls on the hotel's rooftop. It was one of those great Vegas days, the sun was like an inferno but Chris was getting great shots of the girls, using every photo trick he could think of. Probably so he could avoid doing another session. I was there with my laptop, organizing the photos and doing whatever touchups were needed. When we were finally done, we all nearly ran over each other trying to get inside first.
Their show that night was hysterically bad, at least to me. The audience seemed to be 99% guys who couldn't get tickets to the Dolls show and were stuck with the next best thing. Chris and I took lots of photos and tried not to crack each other up. With the show over, we decided to stow our gear in our rooms, get some dinner and try our luck at the tables.
I headed up to my room and when I popped the door open with my keycard, I noticed an envelope with the hotel's letterhead had been slipped under it. Inside the envelope was another keycard. But this one was jet black (mine was a plain white), with the hotel's logo and room number embossed in gold. The room number was 711 (how appropriate). That's odd, I thought. I called Chris
"Hey, what color is your keycard?"
"White, why?"
"I just found one that's black and gold under the door."
"Man, that's weird. I've never heard of that. Try calling the front desk."
I called down and they said it was a VIP card
"What does that mean? I mean, I know what it means, but well, what does it mean?"
(Man I can sound like an idiot sometimes!)
"Well sir, the way you describe it, this is the keycard for the VIP rooms. They're made differently than the others. And the rooms are on the top floor in the west tower section."
"Well, can you tell whose room this belongs to?"
"I'm sorry sir, that information is strictly confidential, hotel policy."
"I see, OK, thanks."
I was still confused but thought I'd see what this was all about anyway. Hell, it gave me an excuse to explore the hotel further.
I called Chris and told him what I'd learned about the mysterious keycard.
"I'm gonna see what this leads to, so I'll call you."
"OK, we'll meet up later on." he said
I snapped my phone shut and headed for the "west towers" section that was described. The elevators quickly filled up with other tourists and I quickly felt like a sardine in a can. All the while I thought "if Chris is pulling a gag on me I'll bury him in the desert with all those other mob guys." But as the elevator made its slow ascent to the top and others disembarked, I was soon all alone. When the doors opened at the top, I was facing a rather large security guard who sat at a desk outside the elevators.
"Can I help you sir?" he asked with a deep, menacing tone
"I received one of these, I guess the rooms are here, right?"
He examined the card, fed it into a card reader, all the while looking at me suspiciously. The reader beeped, and he handed it back to me.
"Your room is down the hall, enjoy your stay." and he hit a buzzer that opened the thick doors behind him
I walked with trepidation down the silent hallway. Its walls were electric red with electric green carpeting. It was like being the dice on a giant craps table, watching the room numbers until at the end I saw room 711. I was about to knock when I saw a doorbell. This gets nuttier by the second, I thought. So, ring the bell.
A minute later the double doors swung open
"Hey, Hollywood, I knew you'd come!"
It was Paris Hilton.
She quickly hugged me saying
"It's so good to see you baby!"
"Wow, I can't believe it's you!" I said, astonished
She was, as usual, dressed for the occasion. But this was very different. She had on a waist length white fishnet-style shirt that showed a sexy white string bikini underneath. And her hair was a casually styled golden blonde. She led me in to the luxurious suite with her arm wrapped in mine. There were floor to ceiling windows that looked out on all sides of the strip and she raved about everything there. I could see an equally luxurious bedroom with a satin robe draped over it
"You've got to see this honey!" she said and led me out towards one window. I thought for a minute it was wide open and I would get to see the street very quickly. Instead I saw a flight of stairs leading to a small swimming pool and Jacuzzi.
"Can you believe it!" she squealed "This is the best hotel I've ever been in!"
"Better than your own?"
"Much better!" she laughed. She turned and held me in her arms hugging me saying "Oh my God, Jim, it's so good to see you. I'm sorry I never called you back."
"Oh, that's OK. I understand completely."
"Look, we're here let's get things rolling!"
She scampered off to the kitchen and I slowly followed, looking at our surroundings.
"So what are you doing out here?" I asked, my voice echoing throughout the suite.
"I was about to ask you the same thing. I thought you worked only in L.A." she said from the kitchen
"Chris got the gig shooting Tigress' show here."
"Oh, the Pussycat wannabe's huh? How's he doing? He really did a great job on those pictures. I should have my guys call him for some more."
"He'd love the gig."
I was looking around at everything in this palace of a room.
"Man, a guy like me could stay in here forever. I'd be the new Howard Hughes."