She woke up from a mid-afternoon nap with swirling thoughts and fragmented dreams still floating through her head. As she climbed out of bed, struggling to her feet, she began thinking about the might-have-beens from years past... and him... Dane. She thought back to being a teenager with the nostalgia of the two of them going to garage sales and concerts together. She recalled buying an old piccolo at one yard sale while he picked through old ham radio components. That day was hot, and they were tired at the end, but neither would have traded it for anything. They were inseparable in high school. She was the outgoing one and he was introspective.
It had been a long, exhausting week, and her girlfriends were coming over later to take her for a night out. Work always took a lot out of her, along with the routine of adult life. There was always plenty of frustration, loneliness, and depression to go around from all the responsibilities and millions of details that needed to be kept straight. Part of her wanted to go out for the night and part didn't. But Paula, the instigator of the girls' group, told the hermit side of her thoughts in no uncertain terms to shut up, as she needed to get out.
She shook her head at herself. Adult life never seemed to be as happy as it was portrayed when we were all kids. "Adulting" was not all it was cracked up to be. Work, bills, insurance, people that matter, people that don't matter, and the ever present "figuring out what I want to be when I grow up" all took their share. This ignored the fact that they had already grown up and had successful careers. But there was nothing like being stuck with the gen x and latchkey kid guilt.
In terms of romantic interests, there wasn't much going on in this small town, so the likelihood of anything interesting happening tonight was... faint... at best. "Next to nonexistent" would be closer to the mark. It was a small town outside a larger metropolis, and you could see modern influences in an older community that wanted to hold onto some ideas that were no longer fashionable.
She was feeling desperate to get out of the house and to see a different set of walls. Spending so much time in front of a camera for meetings and so much time in front of a screen trying to write made her feel like a shut in. But if she went out for the night, the time spent with others would be a good investment and offer a chance to relax to a degree.
It was time to get ready for the girls' night out, and her thoughts drifted back to a game that she and he used to play. For decades they had been friends... best friends... and a bit more than friends, but not quite lovers. This was the greatest what-if in her mind. What might have happened was something she would have liked to see, but only if it was a happy result. Losing his friendship would have been too much to bear. The chance of not having him as a friend and not texting him every day was too painful to consider, and there was nothing she'd do to risk it.
The game between "a bit more than friends" was on the risky side of things. It was absolutely scandalous in a small town. They both wanted more from life, but didn't want to risk ruining the ultimate friendship they'd built. Neither of them had a particularly pleasant time during or after college with their respective lives, but they had always helped each other. She knew that she could rely upon him, and he knew he could rely upon her. It didn't matter what the problem was, they were always there for each other. When in the same city, they were completely inseparable. But fate routinely conspired against them, and physical distance separated them more often than not. Both had started writing messages to each other multiple times, unbeknownst to the other, and every time decided that they shouldn't send those types of things in the end.
They were a pair that could take over the world if they chose to do so. They strongly complimented each other and could read each other like a book. She was gregarious, while he was reserved. She was difficult to embarrass, and he seemed to blush continuously. They brought out the best in each other, which is one of the reasons they were such good friends. If one was having a hard time, the other was on the phone to console them. She often referred to talking with him as her "glass of wine and Prozac". He always knew how to lift her spirits when she was frazzled.
They had come up with this game one night while chatting on the phone. Each of them had been drinking and smoking a good bit of weed before the conversation and during. They came up with a very naughty pact together. When they got together for a day-long adventure, she would wear a remote controlled vibrator, and he would wear a remote controlled cock ring. Each was controlled by the other's phone, with no loopholes permitted. The goal of the game was to get the other person to cum in public in the most surprising manner possible. The only safety rule was that it couldn't put anyone in danger. That meant you couldn't turn it on while driving. But walking through a museum, standing in line at the bar, or bowling... Yes, duck-pin bowling and the game was a competitive, shocking, and amusing combination. One time she'd toggled the ring at just the right time and what could have been a game winning spare turned into a slow rolling gutter-ball after just four feet of travel. During his bowl, he'd twitched and spasmed, then completely forgot about the ball. She had to put her arm around his side and guide him back to the seats for their lane. She had handily won that set of frames and bought the next round of beers.
It wasn't good enough to just turn the remote up on high and let the other person twitch, break out in a sweat, and go cross-eyed while waiting for dinner to arrive at the table. The game was to have the other person forget that the remote control was there, and then make something startlingly special occur. Bonus points were awarded for getting someone to emit squeaks, yelps, clenching the whole body, lose their train of thought in mid-sentence when talking with others, or otherwise destroying their composure.
She desperately missed his reassuring comments and presence. Even though they hadn't seen each other in a while, wearing the vibrator out at night without him brought about the same anticipation as the last time they met. Just knowing it was there made her feel special, even if no one held the other end of the controls. The game was special and shared only between them.
