Where to Find Love

"Oh, I love this," Ellen says while holding a teddy bear. "Look how cute it is." She turns to me and holds the head of the bear before her mouth and nose. I smile.

"Well, it's yours now," I say. "A gift. For being there for me yesterday."

"Oh, Sara. You really don't owe me anything," Ellen replies, but with a smile.

"Don't worry. We're friends right. Friends don't owe, they do because they want to do."

After buying the bear, Ellen and I continue strolling through the shopping streets. When we pass Zara, I decide to take a halt. Ellen doesn't like clothing stores all that much. She only visits them when she knows she needs new clothes.

"Are you going to force me in there again?" Ellen says. I answer her remark with a giggle and gently pull at her arm. I love this boutique. It always has amazing clothes that manage to balance class and sexiness. Ellen and I start looking at some nice dresses and tops.

"Oh, Ellen...," I say when I take a beautiful black top and hold it out. "What do you think about this?" Ellen looks at it.

"Doesn't seem like something I can wear to work. But it's definitely not ugly. I like the long sleeves."

"Great," I say. "We also need something for under it though." Ellen sighs hearable, but says 'fine' immediately after. "Oh, I know," I say. "Where are the jeggings..." I look around until I see them laying on a table. "This one seems nice," I say while taking one in my hands. "The mix of brown and orange is so good. Yes, and then some black heels. Oh, and we'll tuck your top inside your jegging. Classy, sexy and bad ass at the same time."

"Oh sure," Ellen says. "And let's get me a new haircut too." I laugh at her sarcastic remark.

"Don't give me ideas Ellen," I say while I turn my head towards her. "Let's get you to a dressing room." A moment later I'm sitting down on a seat, waiting for Ellen to change. I know she is just indulging me now. Trying to get my mind of things, but why not take advantage of it. Ellen opens the curtain.

"You know," she says. "It's not bad. I think the cut is too low though. Even for nights out. It almost reaches my navel."

I look at her and let my eyes go from top to bottom. "You look amazing. And don't worry about the cut. Your breasts are just the right size for it."

Ellen turns a little and looks at her sides in the mirror. "Hmm. Perhaps."

"This is perfect, and on my first try," I say. "Ah, I'm so good at this."

Ellen laughs when I give myself a compliment. "Well, I admit, it's not a lie. And some simple black heels would indeed look good under this. Oh, and then I'll do my hair in a ponytail. What do you think."

"Black glasses with a ponytail?" I say. "Let's see, sexy, classy, bad ass and nerdy? You'll bring the universe out of balance girl." We both laugh. I can see Ellen really likes those clothes but doesn't feel completely comfortable in them. It's a pity she doesn't value her appearance some more. But I guess she would say I value it too much. "Alright, it's decided. The next time we go out, you'll be wearing that. Perhaps we'll finally get you a second boyfriend."

"Hm..., all these clothes weren't really in my budget this month Sara," Ellen says.

"Really? You earn twice what I earn, you don't pay rent, but you have a budget? Besides, that doesn't matter. They're a gift." Ellen looks at me but doesn't smile. I can see she wants to say something, but before she can, I put my hand on her shoulder. "Like I said, I don't feel like I owe you. You did not let me sleep in your house because you expected something in return. I don't expect something in return now either. I buy this for me, because I want to. Because seeing you happy makes me happy."

Ellen laughs. "So you are saying this is a purely selfish act from your side? Look at that, it seems my personality is rubbing off on you." Ellen closes in on me and gives me a hug. "Thanks," she whispers.

When we walk out of the store, bags in hand, we decide to get a drink. It's a sunny day, although it's not that warm. We step inside a place neither of us know, but it looks inviting. We sit ourselves down at the table and a minute later a waiter comes up to asks for our orders. "A coffee please," I say.

"Not going to order a pastry?" Ellen asks after she orders a piece of chocolate cake.

"Nah. I need to watch my figure. You are blessed you know that. Your waist just stays small. When is see you eating, it just disappears. But when I eat, I could just tape the food on my waist. The effect is the same."

"Alright, it's your choice," Ellen says. "But you know, I read a study that men prefer women with a bit more weight as opposed to thin bodies. Sure, they still prefer the curvy hourglass figure, but better a bit chubbier than skinny."

We talk a little bit about random things until our drinks and food arrive. "Good coffee," I say after taking a sip. "Ellen, about what I said when we were in that clothing store, about finding you a boyfriend. Are you so busy with work? Or just not really interested in finding a guy?" I can see Ellen thinking about her answer.

"A bit of both I guess," she answers. She takes a sip from her tea before continuing. "I work hard and much, because I love my work. I love spending time alone, reading and writing or just watching movies. And half of the time I go out at night it's because of you."

"But don't you miss someone. It's been almost 3 years since you broke up with your first boyfriend, and you had been together for 6 years. I remember the reason you two broke up. The fact that you don't want children, but I'm sure there are men out there who don't have a child wish either and focus on their careers."

"Well, it's not like I have been completely alone in these three years. There was that one guy I met on that dating site I told you about. Although you are right, you couldn't call that a relationship," Ellen says after which she takes a bite of her chocolate cake.

"Aren't there some things you miss?" I ask. I can see Ellen thinking.

"Sure, there are times when I wished I could watch a movie with someone and wake up with someone next to me, But I'm not unhappy, I love my life."

"I can accept that," I say. "And it's not like I'm an example for you." A silence falls and we both continue eating and drinking. "Should I call him again?" I ask Ellen when I finish my coffee and I see Ellen finishing her cake. "You know, to let him talk a bit. To hear his side of the story."

Ellen sighs. "I'm sorry Sara, but that's something you must decide for your own, without any outside influence."

I take out my phone and stare at it. "Who's to say he'll even be honest. Perhaps I should call that slut." Ellen giggles. "Oh please," I say, but I start laughing too.

"I know you would never have sex with a guy knowing he had a girlfriend, but we both know you've had your fair share of men," Ellen says. "Anyway," she continues, "Who's to say she'll be honest? She might want Alex for herself now. Besides, I don't expect you have her number?"

"No, I don't," I say. "I could go through Alex's friends on Facebook. But that'll take so long. Or I could just call Alex and ask for it."

"It's your choice," Ellen says. "But don't ruin your day."

"You're right," I say. "Perhaps I should just forget about it and go on a dating site like you." Ellen laughs.

"You should," Ellen says. "It'll be fun to see your reaction. Oh Sara, someone with your looks, you don't know what you're in for." We both laugh.

We spend the rest of the day shopping and having fun. It is just past ten when we arrive home after having eaten some pizza in a pizzeria. I decide to watch some tv while Ellen spends a couple more hours behind her laptop before going to sleep.