I had just started dating Erin when her dad was getting re-married. I was her guest at the wedding, and I could tell straightaway that this was going to be an experience. Maybe not good maybe not bad, but it was going to be an experience. You see, I would have the distinct misfortune of having to get to know everyone in both of these families at the same time I was supposed to be Mr. Romantic at this wedding. So I would simultaneously have to entertain Erin, while getting to know her entire family, her entire New family, and not knowing either the bride or the groom. Joy of joys, this was to be my first real test as the new boyfriend.
Now, I can't paint myself a picture of ineptitude, I did at least know enough to stick close to Erin at all times, and I had the obvious advantage of having met her father the night before. My conversation with her father was long, boring, and more than a little threatening. He made it very clear that Erin was not someone he would tolerate trifling with, and that he still very much valued her presence at family functions, so I was a little bit intimidated to begin things.
Bless her, she knew just how to settle me down.
The night before the wedding, the two of us were staying at her dad's house, and I couldn't sleep a wink. It was decreed at the outset that she would be staying upstairs, and I would be staying in the basement, but that hardly stopped two creative lovers such as ourselves.
When I heard footfalls at 2 AM, squeaking the floorboards on the stairs, I knew just what to expect. It would be Erin, coming for a late night tryst to calm our nerves. I heard those feet thump-thumping down the stairs for what seemed like an eternity, until I heard the door knob turn and the door open.
"Psssst...Are you awake?"
Now this was strange, this was a voice I didn't recognize. I was certain it would be Erin, but even in hushed tones I could tell that this was someone else entirely.
"Hello?"
"I thought I heard something in the garage. I was wondering if it was you," a feminine voice, albeit a whisper, came from the doorway.
"Where's Erin? I know it's late, but I thought you were her."
"Well, I'm not, I think she fell asleep two or three hours ago."
I could smell something strange coming from that doorway too, and every time she spoke, the smell wafted past my nose. It was a sweet smell, but pungent too, something I recognized, but couldn't put my finger on.
"Wanna get some fresh air?" she asked me, finally, and I wasn't sure what to say.
"I guess so, but what the fuck is that smell? I can't figure it out, and it's driving me nuts."
"Come on out through the garage, we'll figure it out."
I followed her, as I was told, as she walked through the garage door and flicked on the light. I could see she was wearing clothes from a night out at the club, and she walked like she was three sheets to the wind. As she stumbled to the front of the garage, she reached up and opened the overhead door, which was a clear strain for her, as she was only five feet tall, and drunk as fuck.
"Help me, would you for Christ's sake?"
"Oh sorry about that, hold on."
I came around the front of her and grabbed the older looking handle she was using to open the large faux wood door. As I lifted upwards, I felt something awful happen in my back and I doubled over to make the pain stop.
"Fuck fuck fuck that hurts."
"What's wrong with you? I thought we were getting this door open."
"Gimme a minute, I think I hurt something in my back"
I managed to extend my back enough to get the door up, and then I walked out into the cold, dewy night to breathe a little easier. I took a deep breath and then decided to get to the bottom of things.
"So who are you anyway?" I finally got around to asking.
"I'm Becca, the one Erin apparently didn't tell you about."
"Oh oh, right, the sister. I'm sorry, it's nice to meet you, I'm Bastian, Erin's boyfriend."
Had I known what was about to take place, I don't think I would have stopped it, even knowing how far Erin and I have come as a couple. I trust her implicitly, as she does I, and I wish to death I had another solution to the conundrum that this young woman became, but I'm a man after all, and there was no stopping the feeling I got.
"Bastian? That is the weirdest name I've ever heard. Is it foreign or something?" she said in typical American fashion. If it's different, it must be 'foreign." Americans have a strange sense of humor.
"Oh, yeah, it's German, but my parents aren't actually from Germany, I'm originally English."
"Wow, we'll see how you get along in this all French-Canadian family, they don't take kindly to strangers."
I could see she was joking, but I was hardly in a laughing mood, my back hurt like hell, and I still couldn't figure out that fucking smell. I was ready to write this young woman off when she surprised me a little.
"Do you want some?" she offered me a puff of what I assumed was a fag, but the smell finally made sense to me as I sized her up.
"Oh, I don't know, I haven't touched the stuff in months, it'll probably make me sick."
"That'd be the first time I ever saw someone get sick from smoking weed," she was right, I would have to come up with better than that. And besides, I loved the stuff; I could hardly ignore the opportunity to soothe my nerves at this point.
I grabbed what I now saw was a fairly spent roach, and cursed my luck that she hadn't gotten me earlier. Upon lighting it, I realized there was no chance of a cherry there, and handed it back to her.
"It's spent. Fuck, that really would've hit the spot right about now."
"Here, try this then," she offered me something more substantial, and I was all too happy to light up the blunt in my hands.
I was puffing away happily for the next two or three minutes, as we sat and looked at stars. It was tough to see anything for the artificial light all around us, but we made do with the brightest of constellations, until she finally brought up Erin.
"So, how long have you known my sister?"
"Seems like forever, but in reality, it's more like eight or nine months. We only started dating maybe two weeks ago, we were just friends before that."
"And she hasn't told you one thing about me?" she sounded a little hurt with this.
"Oh no, she did, I just didn't have a face to match the stories."
"Gotcha, well as you probably figured out, Sherlock, or whatever your name is, I'm a little gone right now, so carry me inside, because I think I'm gonna be sick."
"You're kidding right, I mean, it's 2 AM, and I'm high as hell."
"No sir, I am not kidding, and hurry the fuck up, because puke doesn't wait for snotty Englishmen."
Sure enough, it didn't wait, but thankfully, neither did I. By the time we made it into the bathroom, she probably still had a ten or twelve count before the waterworks began. I found it to be a touching moment, as this was the exact same kind of event that first drew Erin and I together, but that's another story for another time.
After holding her hair back for three or four volleys and constantly flushing the toilet so as not to arouse suspicion with her father and step-mother, Becca decided that I was released from my duty, and could go about my business.
It was clear to me that she was new at this drinking thing, and that this was just a rookie mistake on her part. What with her not even being legally old enough to drink, I figured this was probably as safe a bet as any.
"What did you drink anyway?"
"Oh we had some Aftershock at the party and my friends and I decided to snack on the crystals a little bit. I know my friends didn't realize how strong they were, they're probably worse than me."
I had to admit, she was pretty together mentally for someone who just spent the last ten minutes spilling their guts.
"Don't you guys have another sister?"
"Yeah, but she won't be around 'till tomorrow at the earliest, but don't worry, she's not nearly as fun as me."
"This is not my idea of fun, although I do have to thank you for the weed, I was starting to bug out a little."
"Don't mention it, but I wasn't talking about drinking and puking when I said fun. I was just talking about being up at 2. How many other people in this family are around to help you to sleep at 2 AM?" she said it in a tone I had only heard Erin use with me, and it made me very curious.
I finally took a moment to notice what she had been wearing during this whole travail, and as I said before, the whole outfit just screamed 'club.'
She was wearing a black top with all kinds of crazy straps on the back, and it hugged her midsection very nicely, I had to admit. That, and a pair of pants that I couldn't imagine her squeezing herself into, they were also black with a zipper right up the crack of her ass. I can't lie, I just love that look when Erin and I go out, and I oftentimes get myself hit for staring too long, but I had a feeling there would be no such punishment this time.
"So...how did you get home?"
"Oh, my friend James took me home, luckily for me he wasn't drinking yet."
"Your friend?" I asked in what I thought was my least 'sleazy guy' sounding tone.