To Love Him

There are only a few moments in life when we find our true selves; when the layers of the personas we carry into the outside world are shed and the soft underbelly of emotion is revealed; when we are naked and exposed to the love and the care of our beloved. Such is the time I spend with him.

He entered my life in the usual way. We were friends online, he living in two cities, mine and his. Chat became a photo exchange, a plan to meet. Fate and illness intervened and delayed our meeting by several weeks, a nuisance to some but painful to us. Once we finally were together, the nervousness of it all obscured my vision of him. I was lost in his vision of me and how I might not measure up to his expectations. I needn't have worried...but I didn't see the light shining in his eyes, didn't notice his delight with me.

The first meeting ended with a kiss; nothing much to speak of, it was innocent and chaste. There was a spark between us felt more by him, obscured by my nervousness. Thank goodness he recognized it and pursued me to the next level.

How does one know when their soul mate has arrived? Is there a flash of recognition, an insight, a lightning strike? Or does a soul mate sneak into our lives, stealthily as if on shoeless feet, the better to surprise us with their discovery?

Two weeks later we meet again. This time I am loathe to get out of the car, I am in the parking lot at the restaurant and I know that today we will become lovers, that we will explore compatibility and attraction. I am mute, overcome and not knowing what to expect as I propel myself forward and onward towards my fate. He is there, waiting for me, anticipation written upon his smiling face and suddenly I am at ease when he kisses me on the cheek and smilingly takes me to a corner table. We chat and eat and all I can think about is the moment to come when we will be alone, when he will kiss me and touch me and I will become vulnerable to him. My sense of attraction is still out with the jury, I am intrigued by him but unsure of anything more. My heart pounds as we leave and while I follow his car to his apartment I wonder, should I just stop following, should I drive off into another part of the city, lose him and stop this folly now? But out of curiosity and intrigue, and the common kindness of my promise, I follow mutely into the complex and park my car. I get out shakily and mutely take his hand as he leads me upstairs to his place.

Once inside we are shy, nervous and he shows me around ending up in the bedroom. His bed is unmade, disheveled as if in anticipation of our union. All the artwork and mirrors sit propped up against the walls, as if this place were only a temporary home, not really decorated and not truly enjoyed. I smile at the bachelor-pad feel of it all. He turns to me and for the first time takes me fully into his arms and I smell all of him, his vigor and his manliness apparent and ripe with promise of things to come. Taking my face in his hand he raises my lips to his and I am lost forever in the most passionate of kisses, I am reeling with the delight of it, his tongue takes total possesion of my mouth and his hands move to feel the fullness of my breasts, heaving and hardening under his touch. I realize at this moment that we are not going to be normal lovers, this is going to be something exceptional...something long-sought and dreamt of, desired.

We shed our clothes where we stand, he is hard already and has become so while we kiss, I am wet with anticipation for the feel of him inside me. His mouth is like a ripe wet fruit that I can't get enough of, I want to drown in the feel and the taste of him. He takes full and complete possession of my lips, my tongue, my teeth and as he moves away to kiss and caress my neck and earlobes he whispers his desire and his passion to me in the ancient words of love...and I swoon with longing for him and move closer to the bed.

We fall upon it, welcoming the respite from supporting our standing weight, we need to release ourselves to this passion now and there are not enough arms, not enough skin to bring us together one with another. Passion demands union and the kisses and caresses grow feverish with need, the skin hunger intensifies, the orgasm we both long for in view, hiding just 'round the bend of our desire...

He reaches for my soft labial folds and begins to caress me...all the while matching my moans and sweet murmurs with his own...encouraging and helping me towards complete release and as he finds my swollen clitoris he rubs me as if my body were his, as if he knows just how to touch me, to love me. I fight the release, knowing full well that he will possess me now, there is no way to stop him from his only objective and he will learn all my secrets and my vulnerability will be total. His fingers tease and encircle her and as he caresses up and down and over and around I explode in fulfillment and cry my anguished release to him over and over again...and hear him murmur softly in my ear how delighted he is with me and how perfectly I am made.

His fingers are inside me now, rubbing me and increasing my need to feel all of him, deep and satisfying and hard. Another orgasm, he will not let me down and tells me so, he is determined for my pleasure to be complete even at the expense of his own...which of course I would never allow...several reeling orgasms later I turn tables on him and take his lovely hard and so beautiful cock in my mouth, leaving him to moan and buck against me, his delight total in my oral talents. I suck him closer and closer to completion, teasing him and tormenting him slyly along the way, it is a ruse to intensify his pleasure...he moans and lovingly speaks to me and encourages me further. When he cums his delight is apparent, he raises his buttocks up off the bed and screams in his pleasure/pain and the overwhelmingly sweet agony of his need...

I suck him softly afterward and lovingly feel him relax somewhat...and I move to be held in his arms as his lips caress my cheek, my ear, my mouth, my neck...he holds me against him and tells me how happy he is and how sweet it is for him and speaks his delight.

This is only the beginning for us...his gorgeous hard and undiminished cock eager to enter me and take possession of that which his hand has felt. He moves to enter me and as he does I cum, flooding back to him my own essence and begging him to continue on. He is suddenly all male primal force, he is all man and I am all woman, he is owner and I am owned and it is too late for me to resist his passion, he takes me repeatedly and the orgasms flow over me steady and sure with his loving. At one point he turns me away from him on all fours and enters me from behind and I swoon with the feel of him deep against my cervix, hard and demanding and in control. Take me, I beg him...take me and make me your own...I need this, I need you, I need that cock deep inside me, I want nothing more from life than to belong like this, to belong to you, to be owned and enjoyed and pleasured for you.

And as we cum again and mix the essences of our souls we have bonded inexplicably...there is something we cannot describe, a power more profound than we have known...and it leaves us in shock and awe.

First fucks are not usually the best fucks. In our nervousness and our haste we sometimes forget to please our lover, to take their needs and desires into consideration and to make them paramount in the act of loving. But this time we are golden. We are gods, masters of the physical and strangely understanding and understood one to another. Loving him is like coming home.

It has only improved with time...the demon in my loins dwells in paradise, owned by a Master who controls her completely with his loving touch, his endless tenderness and his careful caresses. I am home, right where I belong. I belong to Arthur.