I enjoyed the drive back towards my home more because I was more at peace with my life. I had done what I had needed to do and had reconnected with those I still felt were important to me. The insights I had learned from going back home had changed my view on a few things while removing some of the doubts we all seem to have. I guess I felt the choices I had made for myself had been validated. For now, it was time for me to get back to the daily routine of my life until I was ready to make the beginning steps of the next big move in my walk of life. Tammy and I talked for hours as I drove the interstate back to my home in Bellingham. I think we learned more about each other than we thought we had known. It allowed us to discuss some personal things that brought understanding about the others perspective. The little things we learned helped to tighten the relationship we were starting to put together. The honest conservations that we shared that weekend seemed to draw us closer. By the time we were done we had decided that one way or the other we would find the way to be together every time there was a long weekend.
As I entered Bellingham it made me realize how much my vacation had changed me. For the first time in my young adult life, I had to consider the needs of another when deciding on things because I finally had what I considered a real girlfriend who I knew I could trust. The other positive thing was that I knew that I had a new purpose and a direction towards my life that I was looking forward to. My MBA when I got it would be an unexpected bonus for me because most of it would be an asset with the things, I now would be involved in thanks to a father who had set me up for a blessed life. With what my father had left me I had dreams and opportunities bursting force with excitement within me.
The first thing I did once arriving back in Bellingham was to stop at the local Walmart photo department. I picked out the six favorite images from the collection in my phone's gallery and had them printed out as eight by tens before picking suitable frames to put them in. One if my favorites was Tammy's image from the welcome home party taken just after she had taken a dive into the pond to cool off. The way the wet clothes hugged her body gave everyone looking at it a sweet view of her body's natural curves. Using a photo shop type of program, they had magnified her image which brought out some of the features that the normal shot had hidden.
That Sunday evening, I had a few of the group I hung out with stop by to welcome me home. After a few beers while sharing some pizza, we had ordered in most had left leaving Brylee and I by ourselves. Brylee Soon is a second generation Korean American whose grandparents had immigrated during the Korean war. She was attending university full time while working towards getting her degree in the science field. She was an intellectual with a brilliant mind but had the intellect that allowed her to converse with others who didn't have her level of intelligence.
I had told her that I believed that she would go far in research and development but advised her that she needed to remember that most who would be financing her field of research would need to be talked to in the simplest words otherwise she would quickly lose their support. I went on to explain that too often we talked to others as if they had knowledge when they had none. It had been her that had noticed my approach to females.
"Branden," Bry started, "something happened while you were gone that has affected you. You've changed, more than you realize. Proof of that is the fact that we are sitting all alone in your apartment which we both know is a first. You seem to be more at peace with yourself. Care to share what happened while you were gone? There's a softness to you that I have never seen before. What caused you to let go of the self-protective shell you all seem to project when others were around."
Without saying a word, I got up and walked upstairs to my bedroom. I brought down some of the pictures I had printed earlier. Handing them to her I said, "I knew her before I moved west."
Bry took her time going through the pictures, taking her time as she studied each image. She started with the picture of Tammy and I sitting together at the Dairy Queen restaurant first than browsed through the rest before commenting "She's a nice-looking woman, you seem to be completely comfortable with each other so what's the story?"
"We basically grew up around each other and we reconnected while I was back home," I said. "She was a close friend of my two sisters until they started working with our mother to destroy our lives as we knew it."
"So, what's her name or are you going to be your usual self and be closed lipped about everything," she said with a giggle.
"She's twenty-four, her name is Tammy Press and for years as I was growing up, I had a major teenage crush on her," I explained. "A lot of the time she was the bumper that kept things civil between my sisters and myself. She was the calm in the storm my two sisters and I seemed to be always creating. To be frank she is the complete opposite of my mother and sisters. I really did not understand why she was friends with my sisters since she is everything they are not. My grandmother says she has a gentle soul. What I did not know at that time was that she had felt the same way towards me."
Bry got a look on her face as if she was seeing me for the first time, but it became clear that something was being worked out in her mind. Finally, she said "I got it, you're experiencing the excitement, the thrill of falling in love for the first time because you already trusted her and were not afraid of starting to build a new relationship. Its opened you up and allowed you to let go of some of the seriousness you have always carried."
I sat there looking at Bry because I was surprised that she was able to put what happened together in a way that made perfect sense.
It led to a long discussion with me disclosing the major highlights of my trip back home before Bry said, "your family situation is a quagmire for sure. I'm sure you will find a way to walk through it. Do not let the lawsuit consume you. Doing so could cost you more than you could ever realize. Don't allow your family situation to interfere with the new relationships you are building. I see it partly as an emotional thing that you feel you must settle. If that is true than no matter what the outcome is it may not give you the satisfaction, you seek."
Her honest thoughts brought about another discussion about how I viewed people in general, so it was well after midnight before she had left. Just before she left, she said "In your relationship with Tammy keep in mind that it was your openness with her that got you this far so don't let yourself because of family lose it. Tonight, for the first time you left me with the feeling that you've been open and honest in your thoughts. It just makes our friendship stronger."
Brylee's final thought caused me to end up laying on the bed unable to fall asleep because her words had me rehashing a lot of things. In a lot of ways, she was right because for the most part I tended to keep my thoughts to myself. I came to the conclusion that because of what I had gone through I had lost the ability to blindly trust.
Upon arriving at the store, the next morning, the first thing I did was let the shipping and receiving department know that I was expecting a couple of shipments of documents that would be delivered to them for me. They asked if the parcels would have my name on them. I said yes with care of this address. Then I started to review what had been done while I was away to prepare myself for the start of the work week. I was upset that the signage for the latest promotion had not been set up and had to work on getting it done.
It was my routine to start the work week with an informal meeting with the four mechanics, two apprentices, and the sales floor staff who worked the day shift to highlight the things that were in front of us. It was noted there seemed to be a change of attitude coming from me as there was a more relaxed approach from me that they had not seen before.