The Ring of Fire

Everyone reaches that moment in their life where they learn because of circumstances of life that they have seen the world as they knew it through inexperienced eyes. Most don't really understand at that time how much their life is about to change. Most will go through their life for years never knowing it had taken place. Thanks to a father who had taught me to be observant to things happening around me I had developed the knack to pick up on things that others would never see or think twice about. Now looking back, I realize how much that time changed the direction of my life.

Like all immature teenagers I didn't realize until much later how protective my parents had been as I was growing up because they had kept me from seeing how cruel life could be. Little did I know that for me that in a matter of a few days that all my childhood innocence would be lost.

Mine came to me early in life thanks to a decision made by a Mexican American female Criminal Court Judge. Looking through her eyes later I saw how indifferent one could be when one refused to see what was right in front of them because of their personal believes. Until that time I believed that everything in society was fair, and that the truth when heard would always be believed. It was a hard lesson to learn that one could be prejudice because of their point of view.

I learned the hard way during the three-day court trial that the facts did not matter because it was how the facts were twisted and promoted to advance an agenda when presented that did. If the right person had the right listening ear anything was possible. After all, all it took was someone who was willing to believe your information as you presented it that mattered regardless if it was the truth or not. I saw the cost in a real way. It forced me to grow up.

Suddenly the titbits of wisdom that my father had tried to impart to me as I was growing up made perfect sense. Over those three days I took his words to heart. He had always said when the chips were down the only one you could count on was yourself. Now I fully agreed with him especially when dealing with the family we had. What I was witnessing through wide open eyes verified how true his statement was. During those three days I grew emotionally in ways it would take overs years to achieve. It was if I went from the age of being sixteen to twenty-one overnight.

The Judge's ruling was the result of me being forced to watch the end of a long-term game being played out over the last two years by my mother on my father with the help of my two older sisters. Deeds, thoughts, and concepts planted deliberately by them to cause conflict and turmoil had led to the events unfolding the way they did.

By the time I caught on to what was going on it was too late because my father felt that what I believed was happening was impossible. After all he explained in everyday life crap happens and little things only add up to a pattern unless you believe they do. Many conspiracy theories have their start because of views like yours. He then proceeded to explain how certain things could be explained away with a different point of view. Then he said when you have discounted all the other possibilities then and only then can you be sure what you have observed is true.

When he finally learned about my mother's infidelity and her pregnancy from the father's child whom she worked with all hell broke loose because after a couple a drinks my mother's lover could not keep his big mouth shut. He finally was beginning to believe what I had been warning him about, but it was too late.

At that time, I could not understand how it affected my father personally. It took a few years on living on my own to understand how he must have been feeling. Until that moment in the Elks Lodge he had believed the child his wife was carrying had been his. In the middle of the scuffle his heart had to be ripping apart. Every fist he pounded into my mother's lover had to be empowered by the emotions he was dealing with.

It had to have been a drastic shock to my father who was looking forward to going through the stages of life again with a newborn as they grew up. I believe to this day that at that time he did not believe the man he was confronting and was defending his wife's honor. It destroyed him when my mother was forced to reveal the truth in the criminal court proceedings. The look on his face as my mother testified in court that day, I will remember to my dying day.

Throughout the trial the prosecution attorney did everything to convince the court that my father had previous knowledge of his wife and her lover's relationship. Although my dad's defense lawyer I thought had successfully countered that believe the ruling judge did not believe him. My father's lawyer had even called me to testify about my conversation with him concerning my believes. Since it was a trail by judge only in her ruling that found him guilty. She said that he had to have known because of what I had disclosed to him even though he did not believe me he had have been looking for a way to get his revenge. I felt for a long time that my speaking the truth was the reason he was convicted.

Those attending the gathering at the Elk's Hall that night had to call in the police to break up the fight that broke out. They were afraid my father was going to kill the idiot who like so many in our society had an attitude that clearly broadcasted the thought that he was better than anyone else. My mother's lover left the building in an ambulance because he pulled out a knife challenging my father to a fight with no knowledge of the kind of life my father had lived.

I guess in the police's eyes my father's past military training had given him an unfair advantage, so the police officers arrested him. The prosecuting attorney had mentioned his military training many times to pump up his case. By the time the dust settled my father was doing five to ten in the pen for third degree aggravated assault. His only weapon had been his bare fists.

After watching the female Judge during the trial, the prosecuting lawyer, and hearing her issue the sentence, I was left with a very bitter taste in my mouth. I learned thanks to that experience that even in the court system impartiality did not exist. Even in the fairest court system in the world there was always the danger that the truth could be ignored because of one's personal point of view. It was a hard lesson to learn that the one deciding the case could be blind because of their personal believes.

The sentence despite the aggravating circumstances seemed extremely heavy and a miscarriage of justice. Seven to ten years for third degree aggravated assault even by a first-time offender was over the top.

As the sheriff officers applied the handcuffs before escorting him from the courthouse back to his cell my father looked at me and said, "Remember never to doubt your gut because of what you hear. I should have believed you. I love you son. Watch for the appeal that's to come. Remember the Chinese proverb that says a wise man is able to make is own decisions. An ignorant man follows the publics opinion. Proof of that was the judge's ruling.

I knew he believed he had been railroaded. So, did I. My father's lawyer had told me that my father case had been assigned the worst judge possible. He believed that the judge overhearing the case was a man hater and had even tried to get her to excuse herself. He even said that there was a possibility that she was prejudiced because of the color of my father's skin because most of the cases she presided over were of the minority population. He told me he would start the appeal, but it would take time to see if it would be allowed.

I went home that night to hear my mother telling my sisters as they prepared supper that she was going to go ahead and start the divorce. It was now easy to get because of the time my father had left to serve had left her in the driver's seat. Within six months she figured her, and her lover would be able to begin their life together leaving my father with as little assets as possible. At that time, I did not know that the state of Missouri was a fifty/ fifty state.

That night after supper before going to bed my two older sisters tried to get me to accept what had been done by playing down the severity of the situation and their role in it. Being the youngest of us three they thought I was not mature enough to understand or see the situation like an adult would. They talked to me as if I was an immature child without the basic knowledge to comprehend anything.

In was in that two-hour conversation that I had begun to understand that people will only see what they want to see no matter what the facts showed or proved. Most in general will try to make themselves look as good as possible regardless of the truth. Point out things that expose their roles be prepared to be attacked. The words coming out of their mouth were the opposite of what I had observed.

None of the three of us would realize how much our conversation was going to affect us as siblings during our walk of life. The conversation was primary one sided and had a view that I did not agree with, but it did fuel the decision I made later that night.

My two older sisters had failed to see that I had watched them twist and turn everything my father said into a weapon to be used against him. So, when they asked me what my thoughts were about it all, I said no comment. With making a comment like that one would expect to be challenged about it, but those words appeared to just bounce over their heads. I knew that at that time I was outnumbered and was at a disadvantage. I had learned because of what I had witnessed them doing to keep my thoughts to myself.

What I saw as I listened to their spiel was that everything was explained as if it was just a bunch of accidental circumstances that came together that no one had control of. At times they claimed that their actions and thoughts were taken the wrong way. I saw through the brilliance of their bullshit and mentally called what they explained as out and out lies to minimize their participation in what had been done. I felt they were searching out a way to ease the guilt they felt because of what had happened.

They did not know that I had heard them discussing things in detail with our mother on a regular basis when our father was out of house. As they schemed together, I had written down in their own words each night in the privacy of my bedroom while their conversations were still fresh on my mind. From the time my sister's had confronted our mother about her affair my daily log got filled with quotes, time, day, month, and my personal views of what they had said. The first conversation between my mother and sisters I would remember all my life because they had confronted her about her affair with her employer. As I listened to the long conversation, I was able to see how my mother was able to weave her daughters into being supportive. Until then I did not comprehend that one's gender could be used as an asset in converting one through persuasion.

That night I decided it was best for all that I get on with my life because I concluded that I could no longer live with the illusions they wanted me to accept. Dad had always said when you cannot accept the conduct of another person it might be best to just walk away. Little did I realize what a big step I was taking. I unpacked all the sport equipment from the sports bag my dad had bought for me. The sports equipment I hid under the queen size bed I slept in. I then repacked it with all the clothing I could squeeze into it. Leaving behind some of the material things I had always treasured because I had no space for them. I did not realize how big of a decision that was at that time, yet that simple act changed my beliefs in what I would consider as being important to me the rest of my life.

After reviewing what I had written in my logbooks over the last eighteen months I wrote a long three-page summary of what had I had borne witness to my mother to explain why I was leaving which I tossed on top of my unmade bed the next morning. With what I wrote there would be no denying about what had brought me to this point. In the letter I had left I made it clear that I saw my mothers and my sisters as liars, backstabbers, and users of men.

Inside of my sports bag I added the six logbooks I had written. After breakfast, with all gone from our house for the day I went to the bank once it was opened and withdrew most of the funds out of my savings account. At that moment I was grateful that my father had forced me to work part time in his store the last few years. I then went to the nearest bank branch that was different and bought a pre-loaded debit card with it. Before leaving I slipped into the county jail for one more visit with my father.

After telling him of my intentions he knew that I had made up my mind and nothing he said was going to change it. He gave me his blessing by telling me to be careful and stated that if I was desperate for cash or was in a legal difficulty to call his father collect. I told him I figured I had enough cash on me to last more than a couple of months. He asked if I was going to take the car, he had bought me, and I said no because the plates could be traced. With a tear in his eye, he nodded his head saying, "Promise me you will find a way to continue your education and stay on the straight and narrow."

Once I had reached the edge of town, I started hitchhiking and never looked back. Since it was near the start of the summer holidays I headed northwest. Once reaching St Louis I bought a train ticket to Seattle. I did it that way deliberately because I wanted to make it difficult for anyone to find out where I was headed.

I chose that location because of what was being reported about it in the mass media. Being a progressive city, it was clear with the view of the local authorities in that area the last thing they would be looking for was a runaway. Time would prove beyond a doubt that I had been right.

********

I was working as a department manager in the automotive section in a Costco store in Bellingham Washington while continuing my education online. Having finally gotten a General Equivalency Diploma I had my whole future in front of me. It had been five years since I had left home and believe me it was the last thing on my mind because I had decided to reward myself when I celebrated my twenty-second birthday.

The store manager had offered me a job two years back after his wife informed him of the temporary repair, I had done for her because I saw her car broke down on the side of the road. When my supervisor finished his education, he had left to pursue his chosen career, I was offered the position if I agreed to get my Ged. Until I got it, I would not get the title or rate that went with the position. I did it in six months.

I was driving the lube shops truck that Saturday because I was using it to move my meager belongings into my new living quarters. I had just been promoted by the owners and transferred to a new city to help open their newest location of their expanding business.

I had pulled in front of her when I saw her lights flashing with the steam rising out of the car's hood. Walking back towards her allowed her the time to decide for herself whether I was a threat or not. Since I looked like a clean-cut young man, she gave me the benefit of doubt.

She wound down her window just enough so that we could communicate clearly with each other while keeping her doors locked. After getting her to pop her hood I took a closer look.

It took me about twenty minutes after the vehicle had cooled down for me to find what the problem was. By that time, I was covered in dust and dirt. I explained to her that I was going to do a temporary repair on the metal water line that had spilt. It had caused her car to overheat because of fluid leakage. Before starting I had explained in detail what I was going to do.

Using duct tape, plastic tubing, two metal screws, and a couple of clamps I temporarily fixed the car's split metal hose that ran through the undercarriage of the vehicle by using stuff the shop normally carried in the toolbox sitting in the truck. I figured I had wasted about two hours of my time.

Using an empty two-liter soda bottle I collected some water from a small nearby creek numerus time until I had refilled her radiator. She stepped out just as I finished, and I explained what I had done. I told her it was a temporary fix, but it would get to where she was going if she did not abuse the system. I suggested she not use the freeway or drive at a speed that was over fifty miles an hour.

I told her to be sure to have them replace the line and have a radiator flush done before they put in the new antifreeze because the water from the creek may have put some impurities in it.

The nice-looking lady and her daughter asked me who I was and where I worked. I told them. When they offered me some money, I refused politely and suggested that they could pass the good deed on. They then drove to the Costco store where her husband worked in the city of Bellingham.

I guess when he had his automotive staff replace the metal water line that had been broken, they had told him that what I had done was genius because even with years of automotive experience they had it was something they would never have considered because most would think it couldn't be done.

In the temporary fix I had an attached a plastic tube by inserting the line into it to minimize the leak after cutting through where the line had split. After securing it in place with the metal screws I had taped over the rejoined split part with duct tape and tightened it down with two small clamps to keep the insert from moving if the pressure became too great. The mechanic told him that I had to have agile hands in order to get into the space to fix it. He wondered if I had gotten a major burn while doing the repair. Out of concern the lady's husband had come looking for me at the speedy lube I was working in as a grease monkey. It was his interest in me that helped me get my Ged.

The store manager's secretary called me to ask me to come to his office right away. It sounded important so I said I was on my way. I walked in to discover a couple of plain clothed police officers waiting for me. It appeared that my mother had filed a missing person's report on me shorty after I disappeared marking me as a runaway. A computer program had discovered the connection to me via the online university I was doing the courses through which led to the discovery of where I was.

Over the last few weeks, the two detectives had checked me out and informed the Jackson Missouri police department that I had finally been found. Through their contact they had learned why my mother was still looking for me. The two officers informed me that my mother already been informed that I was alive, and where I was living. That was when they explained because I was now a legal adult there was not much more they could do. After a brief but pointed discussion on what I had done with my life over the last five years where they learned about why I had run they informed me that my mother wanted me to call home as there was a serious family situation concerning my father that needed resolved. It brought back what I had left behind.

I ended up spending an hour at least in the store managers office explaining it all in detail. After hearing the whole story, he acknowledged that he now understood why I appeared to walk alone and why I was a man who kept his thoughts to himself. He asked me when I wanted to head back to deal with the remnants of my past. I told him as soon as I found out what it involved, I would provide him with an answer.