Howard was running through the woods as fast as he could. It was dark, but he knew he couldn't stop. He had to get out of there. Howard had spent the last 5 years in Laconia, Indiana where he couldn't stop himself from getting in trouble. Howard never really wanted to get in trouble like this, but he felt he had no choice, he was a self diagnosed sex addict and he took it whenever and wherever he could. Now Howard wasn't a criminal, he would never force someone to have sex with him or anything, what he was was a swift-talking, silver tongued gentleman who had a great ability to convince people to do what he wanted. The reason he was running was that his spot had been blown up, he had finally slept with the wrong guys wife and eventually at least a dozen other men in town were after him for doing the same. You see, Howard never wanted this, their wives had all been with him willingly, it wasn't his fault their husbands couldn't satisfy them!
Either way, that was why Howard found himself working his way through the forest in the middle of the night. About an hour before, he had managed to cross a fairly large river, which he was 90% confident was the Ohio river that separated Indiana and Kentucky. He knew the men would be unlikely to follow him to the next state, so all he needed was somewhere to hide out and lay low for a few days until his trail went could.
After another 45 minutes or so of walking, he came into a clearing and he saw his salivation, a lone church stood in the middle of a field as if beckoning him towards it. He had no idea where he was, but a church like this one at least gave him some hope that he was close to civilization. He couldn't see any cars in the parking lot, so he was relatively confident that the church was empty. Before he could think about it too much and convince himself this was a bad idea, Howard forced his exhausted body to lurch towards the building. When Howards reached the church front doors the first thought started to percolate in his brain, he was on the run, was a priest really going to let him hide in the church? Mentally, Howard shrugged, he had come too far. With a shove he tried the doors and, to his surprise, they opened. Howard crept into the entranceway, the church was totally dark.
"Hello!" he yelled.
Was it possible the church was empty? What a stroke of luck! Clearly there was no one in the main part of the church, and surely the priest would have been woken up by all the noise Howard had made so far. Howard was starting to believe this place was actually empty! He couldn't believe his luck. In that moment Howard decided this was the place he was going to hide out, maybe just for a day or two, until all the heat was off him. He looked around the main chapel area of the church and his gaze fell on the confession booth. That was perfect. He walked up and moved the heavy purple curtain out of the way. There was a cushioned seat built into the back wall of the booth. The interior was a little cramped, there was maybe room for a person and a half inside. Separating the first booth from the second was a fairly flimsy wooden wall. There was a grate in the wall at what would be approximately face height if a person were to be seated and it had a little door that could be closed to inhibit visibility between the two booths. There was a second grate at about the height of the seat. This would work perfectly for Howard. He could sleep here in relative comfort and hopefully remain hidden from the priest when he eventually returned. With a sigh of relief, Howard collapsed on the cushioned seat, drew the curtain closed behind him, and fell asleep.
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Howard was woken up in a start by a loud banging. At first he couldn't remember where he was but as he regained his faculties he took in the cramped booth and the purple curtain and he began to remember the night before. He could see daylight coming into the booth under the curtain so he could tell it was the next morning already. But what was that banging? Shaking his head to clear it, he could hear muted footsteps traveling through the chapel. With a start of surprise, Howard heard the curtain of the companion booth to his thrown open and someone sat down. This person had to have been less than three feet away from Howard and yet they had no idea he was there. Howard didn't even dare to breathe. Then the person, who Howard could now identify as a woman, did something that surprised him very much, she burst into tears.
Howard risked a peak through the eye level grate to see if he could see the woman.What he saw definitely surprised him. This woman looked like a typical southern mom. She had fairly short hair styled in a bob around her face. He couldn't see her facial features clearly since her face was in her hands. What he could see was that this woman was fairly clearly overweight but she was wearing a modest blue sweater that still held her figure and, Howard could not help but notice, had extremely large breasts. Howards felt a stirring within himself that he hadn't felt since Indiana, this was exactly the type of woman he went after. Clearly she was in distress, so he resolved to say something.
"Ummm, hello?" he croaked. His normally confident voice was off-kilter. What was happening?
A yelp escaped the woman beside him.
"Jesus, Mary and Joseph, you scared the bejeezus out of me!" the woman exclaimed. "Who are you?" she asked.
"Uhhhh" Howard was hesitating, he never hesitated.
"Are you the new priest?" the woman asked.
Yes! That's what I am." Howard seized onto the lifeline. "My name is Howard."
She sniffed audibly, "Linda" she replied.
"I didn't realize we would be getting a new priest anytime soon" she told him.
"What happened to the old one?" Howard asked.
"Oh goodness, he was terrible" Linda told him. "He basically terrorized this town. Everyone was terrified of him"
"Holy..." Howard breathed. "Well I'm certainly going to try and not let that happen with me."
"Oh, I'm sure you'll do great honey" She was being very nice to him, but was still obviously holding back tears.
"I'm so sorry" Howard told her. "I've forgotten my job already. Do you feel comfortable telling me what's going on?"
She hesitated.
"I know it's hard, trusting someone new" Howard told her. "But I'm here to help you. I want to get to know the people of this town and I want to help you all."
"I know," Linda told him "You're a priest and that's enough for me to trust you."
"So what's bothering you?" Howard asked.
Linda sighed long and hard. "I've transgressed." She told him.
'How so?" He asked.
"You know, my husband and I have been growing more and more distant the past year or so" Linda said.
A cold stab of fear clutched Howard's heart. His first conversation as a fake priest and he had to deal with a cheating wife. But that wasn't what Linda told him.
"Last night he told me he didn't want to sleep with me and instead he went out to the bar with his buddies." Linda told him. "So instead, once the kids went to sleep I went and got one of my magazines. Last months had a wonderful full page picture of Idris Elba that I've been thinking about for weeks. I got comfortable in my bed wearing my robe and I..." she faltered. "I touched myself." she said eventually. I made myself orgasm. I hope you don't think less of me..."
It was all Howard to do not to burst out laughing. That was it? That was the terrible sin that had Linda sobbing in a church? Obviously this was very serious to Linda though. He had to remember he was in the south, religion and living a moral life were very important here. Perhaps he had found himself in a very pure, moralistic Kentucky town?
He made a decision. "Well Linda, that is very serious." He told her.
"Please help me Father." Linda begged. "I'll do anything!"
