The Love Show 12 Productive Time

I'm Sacha, a Producer on The Love Show and I would be on the crew the whole time with them. Being a producer is a double-edged sword: obviously, I am invested in the couple's relationship as the aim of the show is to create couples that will last the distance. The other edge is I want hours of good, viewable footage. But viewable means enthralling and capturing footage and seeing people mooching about their normal business is sadly not that. I know that relationship drama makes good viewing but can be destructive to relationships, so I want enough heat for viewing but not enough to incinerate the relationship. While I aim to remain a dispassionate observer, human nature means there have been several couples I've been glad to be rid of and two more that I still message.

In our screening process, we extensively interview and test prospects. Andy and Sarah are similar in age, build, and outlook: both technical thinkers, physically active, and intellectually curious. Their responses to our questions were honest and considered, rather than quick flashes -- especially if the question was one they hadn't experienced much. We knew that this is simply a function of their personality: deep when deep, quick when quick, always reasoned, and more from head than heart. Neither were particularly laughy, though their sense of humour is evident, and it builds a smile, which forms a laugh, rather than expelling one from your body. He has a rather sly and subtle way of expressing some things which meant we had to ponder his response, before getting it and she exhibited this periodically. We discovered that when he wants to emphasise a point, instead of being expressive or raising his voice, he does the opposite: he looks at you and speaks much quieter, so you have to listen and absorb his message. She made it clear that she wanted intellectual challenge, and we realised that he was a good candidate for her as he too, prioritised intellectual partnership and that would be a strong foundation needed for permanence. My only worry about them was that sometimes, intelligent people who know what they are and where they are going can be problematic if we want them to go somewhere they don't for filming. Then they tend to politely decide to continue their path which we have no choice but to follow, though it's a better problem than having rude and nasty people.

Neither were particularly bothered about their partner's appearance, apart from some very rationally expressed deads on tatts and piercings. I'd say neither of them are physically stunning, nor are they Shreks. They have a distinct and very modestly expressed sense of themselves, their wants, and reasons d'etre, the clearest of all of the couples in elucidating: only one couple Lindsay and Tony came close. I'd describe them both as modest of speech and modestly conservative of attire, people who lead by reason and example, rather than force of personality.

We do thorough background checks on everyone. For Andy, this was problematic as he'd spent a lot of time working abroad, so there were time zone issues and problems with ensuring we could legally satisfy ourselves, though the results weren't. During a Teams call, one referee looked straight at the camera and very directly stated "I trust him absolutely," which was a first for us.

At the wedding, he looked elegant in his suit, which was typical of his style and like he was going to a formal occasion, which he was. Her dress was elegant in its simplicity, though she surprised us with her near absence of make-up, not that we'd seen her wear much, if any, in our chats. I'd describe her as naturally pretty and she didn't need much either, though we were surprised how short work she made from being in jeans and to to walking out of the door fully wedding-ready.

The only problem with the filming was he fell asleep in the car, and she settled into a state of deep thought. We want them to elucidate their emotions and so, the car filming was a dead loss as soon as the door closed, so did their lights! His sleeping was either faking it like a pro or very in control of his emotions!

At the altar, he sometimes chatted to their families, making polite conversation with her mother and sister, and the rest of the time, he stood there like he was asleep. Together, they looked stylish, like our cake figurines made real. I neither got a strong sense of attraction, nor of disappointment, and we knew from them that they were neither expecting nor wanting instant lust as they'd explained that they hoped for connection, then attraction to build slowly like a cold steam loco on a cold day. I was shocked that he didn't compliment her on his dress as this was usually a bad sign, though when he took her hand and helped her to relax, I realised that he had been focused on her state, not appearance and she seemed to very much welcome this. I thought his later apology for this omission was very sweet, and her response was graceful, though she hadn't been offended by the absence.

Pre-wedding, we film all the participants writing their vows and both had written a lot, so it was a shock when he presented the blank cards to her and essentially winged it. He later admitted to us that he'd written anything but the vows and that he'd composed his plan when running or cycling "Sometimes the best way to think about a hard problem is legs in gear, brain off." Her face showed I'm fucked, and we wondered how she'd react, then ah: plan b, we realised that he'd deeply hit her intellectual spot which we thought was a good sign. Then, not letting his actions go playfully unpunished was both subtle and funny, followed by her powerful and intelligent response and I knew we had equals before us.

After the vows, usually, the participants have a kiss. His run-in, then breakaway was very different and, as we were to discover, a foretaste of things to come as he'd subtly conveyed his feelings, with the intention to make her smile rather than feel muscled. I found his wordless question about the post-rings kiss incredibly touching. We realised that they were building their commonality and rules: one would suggest, the other would briefly consider and then respond. The response would be in line with what the other was expecting: a gentle step, instead of other couples' full strides.

Having someone take off their ring immediately has never happened before, and we were stunned when he took it off before he'd left the building. Placing it above his heart and his explanation was logical, if not romantic in the normal way, though she seemed to think it was. They weren't holding hands much, though frequent brief hand and head touches and plenty of talking and laughing at witticisms indicated they were comfortable and likely taking things very slowly.

In the meadow, we realised that we had a huge problem with the staged kiss as neither wanted nor were ready for this and their joint decision was interesting in how they arrived at their conclusion. Their seemingly nasty and aggressive gestures worried us, even when they told us to take the photos, though it did seem to relax them as they seemed to be enjoying themselves, albeit we were very worried and frustrated by the process. We finally got the brief kiss for the photo, though we wondered whether they were simply throwing us a bone to close it down. I wondered whether this was a foretaste: two intelligents deciding their way was better than ours and very politely and firmly moving down that path, which we had no choice but to follow and film.

Whatever had happened between them at the kiss filming, they seemed even more relaxed, and we wondered who they playing up for, probably themselves, I thought. At the dinner, neither were very animated, albeit very polite: more like two strangers that had just met, than a couple at their wedding dinner. My impression of their mood was respectful politeness, and her family seemed to have taken a shine to him, and also to his parents which was nice, albeit rather too polite and formal for much interesting filming.

When people get to the hotel, normally they are very animated and excited, though these two were very quiet and reflective which was surprising. If I'd considered their personality profiles, I shouldn't have been. For some reason, she had a thing about his suit and jacket, and it was interesting how she playfully examined it without groping him which he, at worst tolerated though more likely, seemed to like. It seemed to be a technical interest in the objects, rather than their contents and he did get a chaste kiss which showed interest, which he returned, though we weren't sure whether the kisses were friend+ kisses or something more. At least we observed some brief touches, though these seemed to be mostly assists, rather than intimates.

Couples normally wind down in the room, though they threw us by deciding to wind down by going for a stroll, so we had to nab the Steadicam, and I legged it for a quick scope as we'd not thought about this. We smiled when they'd got changed as, despite randomly pulling clothes out, they looked like a pair, and him changing in the cramped bathroom was very respectful of her, which seemed his baseline attitude with her and one she appreciated.

The night was warm and dark, and the deck and garden were backlit which was very romantic. We had trouble getting the exposure right on the camera as we didn't want to dazzle them with the spots which also would have ruined the atmosphere. It seemed to relax them as they briefly wandered, then found a spot against the wall. She seemed very comfortable around him as he politely held her from behind and they looked at the stars and I was hoping for a decent kiss to film. Their kiss was very sweet, albeit too brief for our liking. At least it seems to show they are attracted; I thought as they slowly collapsed to the ground asleep. We had a brief team conference about this, and The Runner ran off to find an XL blanket which the Sound Engineer and I gently placed over them. I left The Runner to observe them, realising that they were out for the count. Very sweet, but not much good for an edit, I realised, wondering whether this was a foretaste as I've filmed seven series and know what's good for edits and what's not. Usually, the bad stuff was awful and nasty albeit good for edits. These two were the polar opposite: very easy-going and gentle which isn't very good for edits. Too much sugar is as bad as too much vinegar, and a good sauce needs a balance of both.

The sunrise filming was impressive with the sunlit vistas of the garden, and our couple still in a heap on the deck, then the sunrise slowly hitting them, waking them, and their bodies warming up. We got really good, albeit slightly too panoramic shots as they slowly and silently mooched around the garden, awaiting sustenance and we did get a brief, albeit rather friendly lip kiss.

Most couples are excited at their first breakfast, though sadly not them! They were admiring each other and the views, with occasional comments, and his one about never talking about sex annoyed us. We knew he was very capable of either politely shutting down a line of questioning or reframing the subject, and we wondered how serious it was. She appreciated his comment which he had stated solely as his point and not a threat. Her response indicated that we would have problems with her too on that topic, though at least we got to film their kisses in response to comments, with her holding him and a few other gestures of unknown to us meanings! It seemed that the gestures were the most important to them and had a common meaning, though we had to guess, meaning they weren't very directly open [to us] on camera!

Honeymoons are always interesting as we see how relationships evolve, what excites them, and what annoys them as they build time together. While it was very scenic filming them swimming and walking together and they always looked really good, a lot of the time they were thinking and reflecting and rarely touching for long albeit barely a book-width apart. Space for thoughts, though not necessarily physical was important to them. They allowed each other plenty of space for thinking: too much for our liking and we did prompt them into speaking, which was ineffective as when they had something to say, they did and when they didn't, they didn't. We consoled ourselves that this seemed to be working well for them as they seemed genuinely happy, though not particularly attracted to each other. The post-dinner crossword and newspaper was very good for them, though definitely not for us and we soon realised that while we could prod them to do filmables, if weren't keen they would politely do what they knew was best for them, not us. I knew that they definitely knew what they wanted and where they were going, albeit what I needed for the can was not always that or there. Their staged argument about cameras was fun, albeit very politely at our expense and it deepened their bond which we want in the couples.

I knew from experience that we had a slow-burn couple here: no obvious initial passion, albeit definite attraction, and still no sign of sex, not that I thought I'd ever find out about that after their earlier discussion, which I'd get heat from the Master Producer about. They were very comfortable around each other, sitting next to and rarely opposite, sometimes feeding, and touching with gentle, sweet actions. His "No" comment on the Sex Card Challenge initially shocked us, though the incredibly deep conclusion was a relief. I knew he sometimes phrased responses very formally and elegantly out of nature, though sometimes to evade or obfuscate, and this one, from nature, hit the core of everyone's hearts. For me, it was one of the nicest honeymoons, I've filmed -- albeit the hardest with their unspoken gestures and ease around each other. I was hopeful that we had a couple that could go the distance, though I know that destructive surprises happen.

The real problem we had was that we seemed to have the crappiest mics and receivers ever as they'd randomly cut out, then cut back in. We tried the spare set we'd brought, and these were just as bad. Whatever we did, didn't fix these pigs and I'd fruitlessly called our tech support several times.

After the honeymoon, I was shocked when she called me advising that he was on his way to help out with the earthquake. We've had people suddenly quit due to intolerable bust-ups, though this was completely different. She sounded resigned to the situation, though we were happy that they'd only be apart for a week at a time. Her heading home wasn't what we wanted as it would be hard for us to film her, and she wouldn't be able to connect with the other couples. Her explanation was very rational, and I'd probably have done the same thing in her shoes: comfort and familiarity first with plenty to distract from his absence.

We soon found that his phone wouldn't connect when I called him, and I was worried. I asked her about this, and she skirted it, saying that he'd told her before leaving that he was unsure whether he'd have a phone signal while away, which I understood and hoped would not be permanent. She said they were app messaging though sadly, she didn't invite me onto whatever app they were using.

I knew anything we wanted them to do would have to go through her to then jointly decide, and I was regularly calling her, though I felt too often for her liking. I really needed something in the can for them and was getting big heat about it. She said she was only grabbing quick chats with him, and he was too busy for any staged filming. I wasn't happy with this, though I sensed she was stating facts, rather than fending as I knew she wanted to prioritise their relationship. I thought she was generous in offering to film if she went over for his break week "Down" as she called it. Her request for the wedding footage was unheard of, albeit reasonable in the circumstances and she actually offered to sign an NDA which we didn't take up. I sent Camera Man John over to show her how to use the Steadicam. He reported back that she'd picked it up quickly and had given him a run-through on her Z which she seemed to find more versatile, making me laugh.

I sensed that she respected me from my role, though sometimes barely tolerated some of my questions. The Master Producer was still giving me serious heat about the absence of filming, and I suggested to her that we do a link during Dinner Party at what was his breakfast time. She repeated the "too busy" comment, so I called Andy again with the same, dead result. In desperation, I pinched John's phone and tried again, being very surprised to get him as I thought he was completely out of range. He too, was very surprised at the call, and we briefly and very politely chatted about my predicament. I sensed that he didn't know about my run-ins with her, and I believed that her protecting him was sincere, as are very emotionally, if unlikely sexually, intimate. He agreed to discuss it with her and said I should treat this as a tentative OK. He later texted back finalising it and I thought she'd grudgingly followed his lead, then he briefly called to discuss tech. He briefly turned the phone's camera out onto the stunning airfield, and he referred to "300/30, plus GigE so we should be OK," which was meaningless to me, and I parroted that to the techs. My next call to her was dire: she picked it up and immediately killed the call and, for the rest of the day, my calls went straight to message. I realised that, in going over her head to him, I may have pushed things too far and I wondered what the effects would be, though my instinct was that for them it would not be bad, for me it would be.

We always film the couples getting ready for Dinner Party and it's fun to see what they wear. She seemed to have calmed down in the day following our call and had a few nice dresses she was choosing when we filmed. When she hoofed out of the bedroom in smartish casuals, the crew and I were shocked, though her sister was killing herself and I realised that she was making a very nasty and intelligently made statement to us about our behaviour which I admired her for, though couldn't voice that. I've seen a number of participants in a really shitty mood at this time, invariably after a bust-up, and this invariably means they remain in a foul, sullen mood all evening. I didn't get this sense now as I knew that, ultimately, she is very professional, and the anger had just been released. I was the cause of her anger which had compounded her missing him and I felt personally, though not professionally bad, about this.

Her entrance to the studios as I anticipated, was professional and open and she fronted the questions about Andy and his absence, though she seemed worried which I thought was weird as she should be anticipating the filming and seeing him on screen again. We were using LiveLink for the first time, though our company used it often, and it kept dropping in the run-up. The techs thought it was something at our end that was up. I was with the Master Producer and could see Andy was in a small aircraft, rather than the hangar, and was cold and extremely distracted.

When he appeared on the screen, her face and mood weirdly sank like the Kursk. I heard her watch buzz, causing her mood to slightly lift and I knew he'd messaged her. She had told me that she had to have the phone and watch, which I knew was a statement. I didn't know why she was still so off as he seemed OK, albeit still very distracted in tone and eye movement.

I had offered to pose the questions as I was a known and I asked a few softies about the honeymoon and them and he answered honestly, albeit very tersely and distractedly and it was obvious that his mind was fully occupied with the aircraft. The Master Producer opened the questions to the floor, which I wasn't mad about, and I was hoping Lindsay, the oldest bride, would bite. Sadly, it was Sally, and she asked The Sex Question which I knew from the honeymoon was effectively off-limits, though I was very interested in how he'd respond given his previous answers to hot questions. His shoot-down nearly made me laugh, but I could see Sarah's mood darkening and I wondered whether she knew something that we didn't. There was a background noise, and they exchanged brief words, then she swore and bailed hard calling out to kill the link as her face read MURDER. I reached over and, to the Master Producer's annoyance, followed her instruction and killed the feed, though not knowing why, but knowing that it was the right thing to do.