The Girl at the Spa

To those intrigued as to how come Richie and Ali had never met, it's a very simple explanation...

Because...

And to Connar1, thank you; yes it is 'suspending disbelief'. More than that no one has ever mentioned me, Tolkein and JK Rowling in context before!

As for Meghan and Richie, it was just Spa sex fellas...

Aaaaanyway...

The next morning when I came downstairs and into the kitchen it was to find Fiona in a long red T-shirt as a nightdress having the tiniest amount of make-up applied and while I hate to say it, Ali did manage to make that thin face look pretty and human.

"Fi and I have to go shopping Richie," she said looking into the same mirrors that she had used to set Fifi's hair the evening before, "she's pretty enough to get away with my stuff but she needs all her own. Will you take us into town Richie, please?" she pouted, indicating that Fiona should do the same. Fiona did.

Ali had managed to create a teenage girl from a monster. It was like some kind of reverse Hitchcock movie.

"OK," I sighed, "Just let me have some breakfast..."

"Have a cup of tea and a shower and I'll treat you to brunch out." Ali had her arms around Fiona's shoulders now.

"OK!" I said.

"You know I'll make it up to you Richie." She grinned touching her cheek to Fiona's. I could see that this was something Fifi had never had before and she was responding.

"Thanks Richie!" said Fiona her face breaking into a smile. To my surprise she didn't look in pain or as if she was going to start rolling on the floor like a Estee Lauder Dr Jekyll as she underwent her transformation. I went upstairs with a promise of tea and other things from Alice.

While I was upstairs, Fiona showed the newly arrived Leah the new look and said that Ali and Richard were taking her make-up shopping.

"Come with us," said Ali, "It'll be fun."

"Yeah Leah, come," said Fiona, trying out that whole smile thing again.

Fortunately I was upstairs and didn't hear what Leah said next.

"When I want to look like a fucking clown, I'll wear baggy trousers and a red nose," she looked at her younger sister with distain, "wipe that fucking shit off of your face Fifi, you look fucking ridiculous."

Alice wasn't having that. She'd been in Fiona's life for less than 24 hours and the change was outstanding even from me, the bloke that couldn't fucking stand her or her sister.

"Don't change a thing Fiona," said Ali her arms folded and a tough look on her face, "and I suppose you're an expert on make-up and turn out Leah."

"I know when someone looks fucking ridiculous!" She chided with a superior look on her fat face with the obligatory head wobble.

"Really? I always enjoy listening to experts, please," said Alice, "Do tell." Ali had done a terrific job and Fiona's look would have been hard to beat by any make-up artist with the limited tools available.

"Well... well... Oh I don't have to..."

"Yes you do," said Ali, confrontationally stepping in front of Leah as Leah had done to me a week before, "you've just told Fi that she looks ridiculous, perhaps you'd like to elaborate."

"I don't have to..."

"Actually I think you do. I've spent just fifteen minutes making your little sister look even more stunning than she is normally and you said she looks like a clown. If you're making these brave and insightful statements I think Fi and I have the right to know the basis for that conclusion. Come on Leah, show your workings..."

Again my gorgeous Alice was the teacher, the bully basher, the hero and Fiona was looking up to her.

"Oh..." Leah flustered, totally out gunned and unused to not being the senior partner in any goings on like this, now knowing that her size and attitude wouldn't win out over any disagreement, "I don't have time for fucking shit like this."

"Won't take long, not for a master of the English language like you. Beauty is oft so well described by our Classic poets." She slipped an arm around Fiona and stroked her gently powdered cheek, "After all didn't Lord Byron say, 'She walks in beauty, like the night, Of cloudless climes and starry skies; And all that's best of dark and bright Meet in her aspect and her eyes...'" She pecked a kiss on the same cheek and Fiona giggled.

"Oh... Oh FUCK YOU!" she snarled, "Fuck the pair of you!"

Ali had a quick thought, and smiled,

"You should be so lucky..."

"What?" The shocked expression on Leah's face let her know that THAT wasn't the issue, that was definitely for sure.

"Ease up Leah," said Alice, her body language letting the fat frump know that she really wasn't intimidated by her in the way that scrawny Fiona had always been, "Life is too short for all this anger honey, after all is it not written 'Love will find a way through paths where wolves fear to prey'."

Leah's bottom lip bounced as my gorgeous Alice used Leah's one true love, Lord Byron, against her. She turned, walked around the kitchen table to avoid Ali, who shouted after her,

"Cheer up Sweetie, Be thou the rainbow in the storms of life. The evening beam that smiles the clouds away, and tints tomorrow with prophetic ray!" Leah stopped, turned, and gave Ali a look all hatred, "Honey, it's just poetry, live a little."

With tears in her eyes, Leah stormed off up the stairs, her tea unmade, her breakfast cereal getting soggy.

"Wow!" said Fiona, "you know everything!".

"Yeah," said Ali, her arm around her new protégé, "little bit of Byron never hurt anyone. I'll have a chat with Leah and calm her down later."

We took Fiona shopping that morning, and using an eye trained to body shape and colour, Ali instructed the make-up girl in the department store on what she wanted for her new friend Fi and the girl agreed, and by the time we left some two hours later, Ali had the look she'd planned.

I retreated to the coffee shop and did for an Americano while next it was up to ladies fashion and shopping for our trip to France and the second part of Mum and Dave's honeymoon. Ali picked up a dozen items and dragged Fiona to the changing rooms. In reality it was a chance for my qualified girlfriend to check out my initial diagnosis and cast an eye over my other step-sister and confirm if she really might have had an eating problem. With the numerous hugs and cuddles and what her eyes told her Ali was convinced she did.

"Fi Darling," she said holding a size 8 beach dress up to her, "You need to eat more sweetie."

"Wh... what?"

"Oh nothing to worry about sugar," she told her, "but," she reached around and pinched Fiona about the hips, "Not enough flesh on the bone honey! Trust your Auntie Ali," she said, "you need to eat more and take a different sort of exercise," she looked over Fiona's shoulder in the mirror and the virtually naked debutante before her, "what exercise do you take?"

"I run and I swim."

"Swimming is excellent and running's OK, but you have a perfect body and you just need to shape it up a bit, I reckon..." Ali looked into the mirror, "some extra protein, a few weights, some squats, lunges, leg lifts and bridges will shape that almost perfect arse of yours, but..." Alice gave her a smile, "you have to eat more!" she gave her a tiny smack on her flat bottom.

Fiona gave an embarrassed squeak and a giggle,

"How do you know all this stuff," chuckled Fiona, turning to look at her bottom in the lacy panties Ali had picked out for her.

"I work at The Spa that Richie's Dad owns," she said not giving too much away, "it's what I do for a living," she mentioned a boy band and one of the members, "Do you like him?"

"Oh yeah," said Fiona, "he's hot." Ali dug out her mobile phone and flicked through her gallery until she found the photo of the most talked about band member on an exercise bike with Ali stood next to him with a clipboard. "Oh Wow!" screeched Fi, "Can you get me his autograph?"

"Leave it with me sugar," said Alice, handing her the next thing she wanted her to wear. Fiona looked at her small boobs and Ali noticed. She put her arms around Fiona's shoulders, and hugged her. "The right exercise and MORE FOOD!"

Fiona rested her face against her new friend's one,

"Thank you Ali."

"Don't mention it sugar," she kissed her cheek, "when we get to France I'll help you, I promise."

"Are you coming to France!?"

"Yeah, it's OK isn't it?"

"Oh yeah, that would be wonderful!" She hugged Ali again.

"Let's sort your gear then."

Clothes purchased, they wandered along to the Coffee shop, where I was almost finished with a selection of newspapers.

"At last," I said with a hint of peevishness, but with a smile.

Ali had her arm through Fiona's and I had to admit, the skinny blonde looked much better. Whether it was the fact that she was no longer dressed in straight lines and not looking like an asexual praying mantis, or the fact that her face hadn't stopped smiling since we had left the house that morning and, for the first time ever looked relaxed. She was wearing a pair of stretchy blue jeans that actually gave her shape, and an indication of where her top half and bottom half met.

"I definitely have to come to France with you now Richie," she said, "have to help Fi with her new exercise regime."

"Yeah," said Fiona, who adopted Fi as her name pretty much from that point on.

"OK," I sighed, "guess I won't get you all to myself then."

Ali came across and slipped her arms around my neck and kissed me.

"But you'll get most of me in France Richie!" she pouted once we broke, and turned and winked at Fiona who put a hand to her mouth and giggled. "Come on Baby, I need to feed both you and Fi up a bit!"

We went for lunch and while I had a Full English, Alice selected a whole mess of stuff for Fiona, returning to our table and explaining what each would do for her, insisting that she ate all of it.

Back at the house, Fiona ran upstairs and played around with her new gear, trying one thing with another to create new pairings as Alice had explained to her during their shopping trip. Next it was onto a website and downloading a series of exercises onto an app on Fi's smartphone. As she explained what each would do, she did them with her protégé even suggesting things around her bedroom that Fi could use as weights to add to the value.

"I'll get Daddy to buy me real ones Alice, just tell me what I need."

"OK sweetie," she said. She whispered but loud enough for me to hear, "Richie's Dad is paying for that App on your phone!" They both giggled. Even more bonding.

Sat in the kitchen Ali did explain later that Dad knew the man that had created the app and bought something like five thousand licences per year from him and it equated to about 12 pennies.

Leah appeared and looked angrily at Alice and I sat in the kitchen drinking tea.

"Hi Leah," said Ali, "Richie, give me a minute won't you?"

"Sure," I said, and took my mug to the living room.

Alice approached Leah,

"Look Leah, we got off on the wrong foot this morning, and that wasn't what I wanted to do at all."

"Whatever," said Leah with a Kardashian head wobble and hand wave.

"Look, I just want to be friends..."

"And by being friends that means you can turn my sister into a fucking whore."

"What?!" the nice Ali disappeared for a moment and matched Leah's angry body language and added some. "Fucking WHAT?" Leah's mouth flapped and Alice had her trapped in a corner of the kitchen by sheer force of will. "You have a really sweet younger sister who isn't eating enough and because you never do more than shout at her whenever you take your face out of a book for ten seconds, you haven't even noticed have you?" She snapped, "HAVE YOU!" Leah shook her head, and Ali had found out how to get through to my other, other step-sister. "She's lonely and trying desperately to find someone to look up to. That person could be you!"

There was a pause,

"Why?!"

"Because you are a nice person Leah, I can see that, but... and this is only a guess, I'm guessing that since your Mum moved out and moved on you haven't wanted that job."

"Don't... don't talk about my Mum..." spluttered Leah, "She fucking..."

"Leah, none of this is your fault honey; your angry because you remember more and feel more angry and let down, and I reckon that all you've given to Fiona so far is anger. You've got to let go of that or it'll end up destroying you and her."

There were tears pouring down Leah's face.

"Is that it is it?" said Angry Leah, "you a relationship counsellor as well as a fitness instructor?"

"I'm actually a Chiropractor but yes, I do all of that as well." She put a hand on to Leah's shoulder who moved and shrugged it off, "Let it go Leah, that anger isn't you. That isn't who YOU are, you're Leah, the English scholar, the person that finds beauty in Poetry, not the angry girl that finds solace and respite in it!"

"I'm not angry!" snarled Leah, and then took a deep breath and realised how stupid that comment had been.

"Right," said Ali, "of course you aren't." She patted Leah's fat shoulder, "Just think about it sugar, and remember, none of this is your fault." Ali stepped back allowing her to walk away. She didn't so Ali smiled, stepped forward and gave her a hug, turning and walking into the living room where I was sat drinking my tea.

In bed later, Ali confessed that she had learned half a dozen Byron quotes from Google on the train, not quite having worked out what her plan of action was going to be with angry Leah.

"It's her raison d'être, her 'thing'. As soon as some bloody slapper from Cornwall proved to her that pretty girls with big tits can bash out a little bit of George Gordon's finest work it kind of pissed on her bonfire."

"So have you finished with her?"

"Not by a long fucking way," she sighed, "chances are she'll stay in her room for a day or so at least," she stretched her neck back and closed her eyes, "I think Princess Leah is going to take rather more sorting out than tiny little, malnourished, elfin Fifi, and I'm not sure that Byron is going to be much more help," She reached across to the bedside table for her phone, "might have to look up some more quotes though Richie!" she grinned, "here," she said, "one just for you, me and Port George." She sat up, "There is a pleasure in the pathless woods, There is a rapture on the lonely shore, There is society, where none intrudes, By the deep sea, and music in its roar: I love not man the less, but Nature more..." She grinned, and I saw that her eyes misted a bit.

"Come here," I said, "and love me more..."

She did.

The following day I booked four tickets to Toulouse Airport and after a day on our own in London sightseeing we were up early and sharing a taxi to the railway station and I gave the front seat to Leah so she wouldn't have to work so hard not making eye contact with anyone. The train took us straight to Gatwick.

On the plane, we had a corridor between Ali and me and Fi and Leah. Leah had her head in a book and was making notes. Ali noticed.

At Toulouse, I asked Leah and Fi how we should get to their Dad's place.

"Ask her," snapped Leah nodding her head at Ali, "I thought she had all the fucking answers."

Ali looked at Fi with something akin to a hurt look in her eye and Fi picked up on it.

"LEAH!" she snapped at her sister. It was another revelation to me; gone was the adenoidal bitchy whine of the weeks before replaced by the kind of noise you would expect from a cross eighteen year old adult. "Oh for heaven's sake!" Fi put a hand on my apparently hurt girlfriend's shoulder and stepped up. "We go across to the bus station there," she said in the first remotely adult conversation I'd ever heard from her, "We take the 32, or the Trente deux as the French have it, to Le Quary and the bus stop's just across the road from it. I'll show you."

"Thank you Fi," said Ali. We walked across the concourse to the large bus terminal, and Ali gave me a smile as Fi walked on ahead with a new purpose to purchase the tickets in her excellent French. Ali's look was all satisfied 'did you see what I did there?' and I returned the smile and nodded in appreciation.

About an hour and a half and four Café au lait's later we arrived at Dave's place in the French countryside and I introduced him and Mum to my girlfriend Alice. I had already sent Mum a text asking if I could bring my girlfriend with me. She replied yes, the guest room was a double and she looked forward to meeting 'her'.

"Mum, this is Alice - Ali, this is my Mum and this is her husband Dave."

Dave the Leech stood stunned by the gorgeous young girl half his age, and tried to be charming without suggesting to Mum that he meant anything by it. Ali grinned at his attempts at being suave and sophisticated, while Mum pursed her lips and shook her head. After greeting us he resumed his place at Mum's side.

"This is a lovely place you have here Mr and Mrs Tomelty," said Alice, turning it on.

"Please," said Mum with a warm but cautious smile, "Call me Laura, this is Dave."

"Thank you Laura, Hi Dave!" she giggled.

Ali had gone with blue low rider jeans and a fitted T-shirt to meet the rest of my family, and I could see that her audience were impressed.

Mum suggested that she would get lunch and of course Ali offered to help. Mum would not hear of it and said that she should relax by the pool like Leah and Fiona.

Leah wasn't relaxing by the pool of course, she was in her room with her head in a book. Just because she was no longer in her 'study', that was no reason to cut short her literary devotions. I found out from a few days later that half of her suitcase was filled with her books. But this was Leah; I think she would sooner have cut off her hand and joined a convent than read from the internet or, God forbid, a fucking kindle.

Ali asked if she was sure, seeing as the other two girls had disappeared, but Mum was adamant, insisting instead that we relax from our journey and get changed. We explored the house and found 'our room' and once inside Ali reached into her bag and withdrew that brown bikini she had worn on the first day we met and it looked just as devastating.

"I'll take a T-shirt Richie, just in case I look like giving Dave a heart attack." She said. "Oh and I brought the special factor 15 so we can work on your tan."

We both stripped naked and massaged the sunscreen into each other, dressed in our swimmies and then got out to the pool in time for Mum to arrive with lunch.

Mum looked across the pool and saw Fi and Ali in bikini's and most amazingly appeared with the second tray of food wearing a swimming costume. She looked good, but having seen so much of Meghan's body, Mum needed some work, and I guessed that during our fortnight in France Ali would give her that help. After we cleared the plates and the trays, we started to relax on the sun loungers. Mum already had a bit of a tan, but still Ali insisted on putting the factor 15 on.

Mum said that it was fine and that she could do it herself. I looked at Mum,

"Mother, trust me, let Ali do it."

Mum looked at me shrugged and then smiled at Ali. My gorgeous girlfriend stepped across and stood over Mum pouring some of the cool cream into her hands and warming it. Next she spread it across Mum's shoulders and dug in. For the next fifteen minutes Mum groaned or purred on and off and Ali found various muscles that needed sorting out and she duly did so. What was supposed to be a quick application of sun screen ended with Ali chatting to Mum about her musculature and doing the first of three treatments that finally solved Mum's hip pain fifteen year after her boss said she should visit her ex-husband seeing as he was so good.

Once finished she sat down next to me to drink wine and beer and eat the nibbles left from lunch with the rest of us. Mum looked across at me and to Ali who was chatting to Fiona about skin care and starting to apply sunscreen across her back. Feeling refreshed in a way that only a Spa massage can do, Mum stretched out and looked at my gorgeous girlfriend. she smiled and raised her eyebrows and with a slight inclination of her head towards me nodded her appreciation.