Outside the hospital, Lilith continued running down the street. Her mind played and replayed the events of that fateful dinner at the cabin with Levi Sethos. Why hadn't she seen it coming? Why? She could hear their conversations, his offer to her, even her refusal. She continued to run, blind to everything around her, even the cars that slammed on their brakes to avoid hitting her. All she could see was that night as it replayed itself in vivid detail.
After getting up from her seat at the table Lilith barely made it two steps before he grabbed her and forced her screaming through the French doors and into the master bedroom. Now she knew what he had whispered to the private chef. It was a command to leave and not come back for a while. Levi forced her onto the bed, his body pressing against her and the smell of that damned cologne. She remembered feeling his hot lips against her neck and face, his bulge, hard and demanding against her pelvis. Even now she shuddered at the memory of his hands holding her thighs and trying to force them apart. She kept screaming for him to stop but he didn't. Desperate, she tried to reach for something and managed to get a hold of the pretty metal chopsticks she was wearing in her hair. Forged from ore mined in the deepest pits of Hell, these sticks were sharp as daggers. Using all of her strength, she managed to plunge them deep into his shoulder, causing him to cry out and fall back. Seizing the opportunity, she ran to her car as fast as she could without looking back.
That memory combined with Millie's murder had planted seeds of emotions she had never felt before such as fear and grief. Seeing what the Preacher-man was doing to Eli and particularly the way his hired thug had pushed him against the car and threatened him in front of the bar had made those feelings grow and now protecting him had become more important than saving herself. She couldn't let Eli get hurt because of her. The Preacher-man had already affected his job, vandalized his motorcycle and there was no telling how far he would take it.
She finally stopped to catch her breath and looking around, she found herself before a church. It wasn't one of those large over the top structures with massive amounts of ornate glass and huge front columns or enough parking to accommodate a stadium. No, this place was a simple two-story square building of brick. There wasn't even a steeple. The only thing that broke up the plain facade was a single curved corner that was the main entrance to the church.
Normally such a sight would have been enough to repel her, but something about the two-story edifice with its terra-cotta color seemed so peaceful. It was hard to say what drew her to the building. It might have been her desperation, or her need for sanctuary from the cruelty of the Preacher-man. It might have even been the memory of an innocent time before she had separated herself from Heaven. Back then she had freely spoken to God, but it was so long ago and she was not even close to the same woman anymore.
Opening the heavy glass door she stepped into the foyer, all the while wondering if God would hear her now if she came to Him. Would He even care about an outcast like herself? Lilith began to walk towards the doors that led to the sanctuary, but her every step felt heavy and weighed down. It was a short distance, a matter of maybe twenty steps, yet more than once she had to stop and summon her strength to keep going. She was certain that if she could reach the sanctuary, then there would be a chance that God would hear her cries and make her whole again.
The handle of the door was cold as she gripped it, then opened it and slipped just inside the threshold. Alone and leaning against the sanctuary doors, Lilith looked about her surroundings, unable to step any further inside. Since no service was being held at the moment the place was dark except for the light coming in from the windows shining down and allowing her to see the sanctuary and its holy appointments.
It wasn't a huge church but it was big enough and it looked every bit like a typical house of worship. There were the long hard pews all facing an altar that was adorned with flowers and an intricately carved white wooden cross that boasted fine filigree details. Engraved across the front of the altar were the words 'Do This In Remembrance of Me.' and at the sight she instinctively recoiled. A series of large stained glass windows depicting stories of Christ bathed the darkened space in a myriad of colors as the sun shone through the intricate pieces of glass. The only thing that was remotely unusual was a stack of hymnals sitting next to a cardboard box. She could only assume that they were headed for storage or something.
Lilith was grateful that she was at least alone. She had no desire to explain herself or what she really was to anyone. It was hard enough as it was. She had heard people say that all God's creatures were welcome in his house, but she was not God's creature anymore. Every pew and the very altar itself seemed to whisper 'the damned have no place within these walls'. Looking up at one of the windows at the face of Christ surrounded by children, Lilith should have felt God's love, but instead she felt as though it were saying 'get thee from this place and return to hell where you belong.' Broken and ashamed Lilith fell to her knees and softly prayed.
"C-can you hear me Father . . ." she began. She really didn't know how to approach God and ask him for help after shunning him for so long. Could he even hear the voice of a demon crying out from darkest Hell? "I don't know how to pray, but I need your help. Please, please help me, Father. Make me whole again. You made me what I am and with a single breath from your nostrils I know you could do it again. Just the whisper of my name from your lips can fix everything and restore me." Her voice echoed throughout the space, but she never noticed. She was more interested in making her voice heard by Holy ears. "Please! I don't know what else to do!" Lili looked out across the empty pews toward the pulpit and glared. "How can you be silent when Levi Sethos lies and pretends to be your messenger? He breaks your commandments and dirties your name and yet nothing happens. You cast me out for my wickedness . . . what about his? Give him to me, Lord. Let me sift him as wheat. Grant me my power and deliver him to me and I swear to you that he will pay for all he's done."
She waited, almost expecting an answer, but there was none. She was at a loss. She dropped her arms into her lap and sat there in silence. She closed her eyes and for a moment she saw a flash of her dream and the image of Eli's head hanging by his hair from the chains wrapped around the demon giant Jack-in-Irons. Instantly her mind and heart were on fire desperate to keep Eli from dying at all costs, either at the hands of the Preacher-man or falling into darkness. So focused was she that she never saw a door to the right of the chancel open slightly, or see that someone was watching her.
"Father . . . there is a man, a good man and I don't want to see him hurt or murdered because of me. I know I have continuously rebelled against you and I will gladly pay the price for all of my wickedness, but please, Father . . . I beg you . . . don't make Elijah suffer for my sins! He has done nothing except help others and do what is right. I offer up to you, my life, my existence . . . all I have in exchange for Eli, please . . . please . . ." Her words were honest and heartfelt. She waited, peering in the dark space hoping for an answer . . . anything, but nothing happened. There was only silence, even the stained glass dove above the baptismal seemed to turn away. "I am truly forsaken even unto the end of time."
Out of strength and hope, Lilith bowed her head until it was resting on the carpet and began sobbing. There was no such thing as mercy, at least not for her. She had slapped the hand of God away a long time ago and there was no going back. She wiped her eyes and looked at the tears that dampened her hand. This was the second time in two days she had cried. Everything was so out of hand and she felt helpless to fix it.
"No one is truly forsaken who believes in God and accepts Christ as their savior," said a voice. "All are sinners. All fall short of the glory of God." Startled, Lilith instantly sat up and began to try and wipe her face, something that was rather difficult with a splint on her right hand. She looked down the aisle and saw a man walking towards her. His face was kindly with bright, friendly eyes and a smile so radiant that it beamed from his eyes and even the crows feet around them. Everything about him was warm and welcoming and even without knowing who he was, she could sense the Grace surrounding him and intuitively tried to step away from it only to run into the door .
At first glance he didn't look like a typical pastor or deacon because his clothes were plain and he wore a pair of work boots that looked as though they had seen plenty of farm work before. Lili knew well though that looks could be deceiving and the aura about him was no lie, nor could she deny the power of the Bible in his hand. The closer he got, the more she trembled.
"I'm sorry to startle you, I left some papers here earlier by mistake and I had to come back for them. I'm Pastor Michael Eilish." He started to extend his hand to her, but Lili could only press herself against the doors as much as she could in order to keep herself from so much as brushing against him. Looking into her eyes and seeing her fear and hesitation reminded him of a wild and savage animal.
