I was greedily gulping down air as hands explored over warm flesh. His larger over my smaller, softer form, whilst mine traced hard muscle-curvature over a broad, biological expanse. Years of martial arts and gymnastics training had left me like iron, or so I'd thought. I had simply not understood how soft I was until this very moment, until I'd felt a man's generic inclination for such athletics.
I was nearly choking on my sharp gasps of nervous delight. I felt my chest pinch almost uncomfortably, though in a far more gentle way than I would've ever thought possible. My heart was thundering a mad beat of utter insanity as my eyelids drew unnaturally heavy.
'Is this...is this really happening?!' I silently wondered, my drowsy yet alert mind a dancing raspberry of sour-sweet flavor.
I glanced up to meet his gaze. He was as red-faced as I felt. His eyes reflected the same hunger that I knew my own must've held.
I wasn't ready.
'I'm not?' I silently inquired of my own inner consciousness.
It didn't matter anymore. I didn't care anymore. I was unready simply because I might've still had a dream to chase before now, a promise to the man whose hands explored warm, tinder, trembling flesh.
'What am I hoping will come of this?' I wondered, as blindingly baffled as I was earnestly eager.
My sundress came up as my heart seemed to jump into an even quicker beat. Over my thighs, above my waist, up to my chest.
I could hear Hi-chan groan, sounding as though he was choking on something painful.
"You're...too much, Sh-ichan," he croaked out above me as my yellow sundress obscured my vision and continued on and off.
A part of me wanted to stay hidden. A part of me wanted this to be a dream, a feverish fantasy I'd spent countless a night envisioning without reciprocation or fulfillment.
'Am I willing to give up my dream for this romp in a hotel with Hi-chan?' I wondered to myself, truly unsure of the answer hidden deep within.
A choking gasp escaped my trembling lips as I felt two large hands cover my previously-exposed, minus my bra, breasts.
"You are so beautiful, Shi-chan," Hi-chan muttered, still sounding as though he were in pain.
I could feel his stiff member between my legs, through his pant-covered crotch. Our groins were touching and it was driving my thoughts into wild imaginings to come as I squirmed. His hands came off my chest as he finished pulling my sundress away from trembling fingers.
I nibbled nervously at my lip as my body shuddered in anticipation. Our eyes met, nerves frayed to their limits, and I could see the pained hunger there. He wanted so much to ravage my body that it hurt to hold back. I could also see all his love and adoration he held for me there as well. It helped to hold his control with a vice-like grip, and I adored him, in turn, to no end because of it.
'Do I want this to happen? Do I love Hi-chan?'
I think I truly did. I think I would truly give it all up for one day with the man atop me, rolling in sheets of heavenly bliss. I smiled, and I could see the surprise etch itself upon his face.
"I...I...lo...love you," it came out as a trembling choke, but I knew it was heard, all the same.
I could almost see tears form in his eyes before our lips met in furious need.
'Oh God!'
Was I a good kisser? I didn't think so, as I had no experience to speak of, minus a one-time moment with my best girl friend at Belmont Park a few years prior. Truth be told, I didn't know if Hi-chan was a good kisser, either, but it was the most passionate kiss, the most passionate, euphoric experience, I could've ever hoped to dream up. He bit and nibbled at my lower lip like a starving babe trying to suckle milk. It took me only a moment to realize that he was begging entrance. I wished, right then and there, that I had the foresight to brush my teeth before I was carried to this bed, truly I did.
His tongue probed every bit of my mouth. Teeth and tongue alike were searched eagerly as I sucked his roaming organ into my upper orifice.
'Is this what a French kiss is actually supposed to be like?'
No crevice of my mouth was left unexplored as I tried to in earnest to sooth the hungry tongue with my own. Drool was starting to make its way down the sides of my mouth as wet slurping noises invaded the quiet of the room.
He was completely dominant, and I was completely willing to allow him to have his way with my mouth, brushed teeth after lunch or not. The braised pork taste reminded me of another life, one which I'd taken part in before I'd quit animal products altogether, as his tongue massaged my own into an almost numb yet fiery state.
His left hand had me behind my head as his right found its way into my own left hand. Our fingers intertwined as my right made small circles upon his chiseled pectorals in dizzying appreciation.
My eyes were closed from start to finish, even as my lungs instinctually forced my breathing to become calm from years of athletic training.
I was on the verge of weeping. I knew he loved me, in turn, with all his heart. He had loved me since that day in grade school where I'd gone up in front of the class and nearly embarrassed myself simply by introducing my shy self, and I think, deep down, I had loved him when he'd obnoxiously became friends with me that day. Maybe.
We broke apart, and even through our conjoined hands, I could feel his body trembling. He planted a kiss on my forehead as my eyes slowly came open, though they were clouded in blissful euphoria.
"Shi-chan, I can't...I...I need you. I..." he groaned, still sounding as if he was in utter agony.
I gulped down all my nervousness as fear began to take over. I did want this, deep down, but was I ready?
'Can I even...handle it?'
I glanced down at the bulge between his legs, which caused me to gulp in fear once more. If our clothes came off, fully and truly, there really would be no turning back. I snaked my tongue out, licking my suddenly dry lips. Before it could slip back into my thoroughly used mouth, however, our faces joined once more in a fiery kiss of thoughtless passion.
I finally let out a small moan into his mouth that I couldn't find any concern in withholding. I wanted him to know I felt good. That seemed to be all the signal he needed to remove his left hand from behind my head, only to begin roaming my susceptible body once again. This, of course, caused tremors of pleasure to shoot up through fiery flesh, which, of course, caused even more small moans of bliss to escape into his mouth. The cycle repeated as he became more and more determined to explore every centimeter of my body whilst I was content to lay there and take it in delightful shudders.
