Chapter 1
The private company owning the hugely successful Softly monthly magazine, produced in New York and unabashedly aimed primarily at female college graduates, announced the magazine had been sold to a mining billionaire from Western Australia for an undisclosed sum.
Indications were that Billy McGuire reputedly had purchased the magazine as his 25th Wedding Anniversary gift to his wife Matilda.
The news media ran themselves ragged trying to get 'new angles' on Billy McGuire, a semi-recluse rarely seen out of a checked blue and white shirt, faded blue jeans and working boots.
Despite some newspapers spending big to send reporters to Perth, Western Australia, and a willingness to pay big money for 'the dirt' on the McGuire family, very little that was new surfaced and nothing of it was sensational.
Soon after finalization of the purchase, the McGuire's were in New York and twice visited their new acquisition. At the end of that second day visit, Billy and Matilda McGuire and their youngest son Lucas appeared on CBS evening news.
The couple were charming and Lucas smiled and just said, "Ask mum" when he was asked questions.
"If you have been married 25 years, how is it that Billy is 30?" asked the interviewer.
The glamorous-looking Matilda said, quite unabashed, "Because Billy and I didn't get married until Lucas was five. His older brother of course was older."
"You don't get asked questions like that in Western Australia," said Billy. "I suppose it's because we give away heaps of money and because of that are respected by our community."
"How much have you given away?"
"How much do you weigh?"
"I beg your pardon?" said the female interviewer indignantly.
"I feel the same way about your question," drawled Billy, smiling.
The interviewer recovered and said, "What changes do you proposed to make to your magazine, Mrs McGuire?"
"Only two. From tomorrow Lucas becomes executive editor and he'll also be elected company chairman."
"Editor? But Lucas's male?"
"I'm his mother young woman, don't you think I'm aware of that? It's my magazine, my favorite magazine in fact, and now that I own it, I can do anything I like with it."
"At this stage, I do not propose making any other changes. That will be up to Lucas. He has a degree in journalism but had been unable to find a job except on the only other publication Billy owns, a monthly bulletin reporting mining news throughout Western Australia."
"I thought Lucas deserved better than that and asked Billy to buy me a magazine so I could give Lucas a decent job to get his teeth into. Billy asked what magazine and I said Softly."
"I find that incredible."
"Please yourself how you view it young woman. I find it a damn practical solution."
"Lucas, your comment please on your reaction to your mother's generosity in buying you such a great job?"
The interviewer rolled her eyes and thanked the McGuire's for their time immediately Lucas had replied, "Ask mum."
When that interview screened, the print media scrambled to track down this hugely offbeat family but despite exhaustive hotel checks failed to find them. No one thought of checking the Ramada Bronx.
Next morning most of the people working on Softly were discussing looking for new employment because they couldn't see readers of a soft-focused women's magazine accepting a male controlling editor no more than they would. Dire predictions about the demise of the magazine were bandied about.
The private company-owned magazine had hit readers with a great formula and, as a result, after the first four foundation years had reputedly turned out excellent profits in each of the subsequent five years. Media commentators had produced sale price guesstimates ranging from $19 million to $410 million, suggesting the writers really had no idea or hit the wrong buttons on calculators.
On the other hand, one of them could have been close, but which one?
Sue Blewitt, HR manager, entered the company's crowded café where all personnel had been called to a compulsory meeting at 9:30 to meet the company's new chairman/executive editor Mr Lucas McGuire and his mother, the new owner of the company.
"Quite everyone please," said the company's deputy chairman, taking to the rostrum. "Please stand and welcome the new owner of our company, Mrs Matilda McGuire and her son Lucas who is the new executive editor and company chairman."
Lucas entered first, dressed in a snappy light-blue Italian-cut suit, and he waved to the clapping gathering and smiled warmly. He turned and said, "Come in mother and say your piece."
Mrs McGuire wore a knee-high black skirt, black polo and multi-color elaborately embroidered Oriental jacket and black cap. Her hair and skin looked great and she had the figure of a younger woman.
Mother and son appeared bent on effectively snuffing out mutterings about a takeover by brainless Aussie moneyed interlopers.
"G'day everyone," she said. "Thanks for turning out. I already know you are a fine mob because I've read the magazine you produce since its first issue. It's up to my son to what happens now but rest assured, no way do I wish to see my magazine take a backslide. I've told my son if he fouls up, I'll have him castrated. Thanks for doing a great job everyone and believe in my son and you won't go wrong."
She stepped back and everyone, half-stunned by the castration bit, clapped raggedly.
"G'day everyone and everyone should call me Lucas. The title of mister is for real gentlemen. We Aussies are more informal than Americans but that doesn't mean we're more immoral or dopier than Americans."
"You might think it's a bit rich of my dad paying all that cash buying this magazine as a present for my mother who, like most mothers do, wanted her last-born to have a good job. Well I believe both of my parents are visionary and with that said, I say no more on that subject."
"Guys and gals, it's up to me to avoid having a very unpleasant operation ordered by my mother (snigging). I'm thirty with a master's in Media Studies, majoring in journalism. I've never worked on a women's magazine before but let me remind you Columbus had never been to American before and yet he discovered it, so what does that tell you? Yeah right."
He paused and the resentment bubble burst. Lucas had them laughing and applauding. There was something about him that suggested he was well short of being an idiot.
"In the past three financial years, Softly's paid circulation has ranged from 802,892 to 923,666, the trend-line in those three years being somewhat erratic and that just goes to show what front cover impact appeal can do, because almost all of the issue-by-issue fluctuations have reflected in newsstand sales. In comparison, the trend in non-renewal of subs shows no similar dramatic change."
"I intend listening to consultants about how to smooth out fluctuations in sales rather than listening to consultants suggesting how to smooth out you people, because most of you guys are specialists in compiling and producing our successful magazine. Likewise, those of you involved in actually promoting sales have had nine years to work everything out and yet there are still blimps on our screen."
"In the interest of protecting my testicles from the possible wrath of my mother's pet surgeon, my number one priority is to crack the 1 million sales barrier and believe me, I know I won't do that by making all bad decisions and I won't reach that very short-term goal without total team support."
He paused and was applauded.
"Thank you. That's all. I'll chat to you all before too long and if I miss any of you then two weeks from today then you come and tell me about it. Thanks guys. Off you go and wave goodbye to mom. She goes to visit her parents in a retirement facility in Arizona today and from there she and dad then tour the south before heading home. Her mom, my gran, is American, born and raised in Des Moines, Iowa."
