Scared Sara Ch 03

When I woke up again, Lucien was gone. I looked at the bedside clock, it was already ten, he must have gone to class. My door opened and there was Lucien, smiling at me with a breakfast tray in his hands. He had his jeans on but was shirtless. I wouldn’t mind having him for breakfast!

“Morning darling. I made you breakfast.”

I sat up and he put the tray on my lap. There was fluffy scrambled eggs, toast, tea and juice. “You’re certainly full of surprises,” I told him. “I thought you’d gone to class.”

“No, today I’m all yours. I’ve asked Brian to stop by with notes later. Now eat, you’ve got to take your medication,” he said gruffly.

“I think you need to work on your bedside manner” I grinned at him.

He leaned forward and kissed me, nibbling on my lips. I opened my mouth and his tongue swept in, sensuously stroking mine. It was a hungry, wanton kiss and I was gasping when his lips released mine.

“Better?” he asked huskily.

“Ooh much. Though I’m sure your patients wouldn’t want to get well with that kind of treatment.”

He wiggled his eyebrows mischievously, “That ‘treatment’ is exclusively for you darling,” he said grinning.

I giggled and blushed. When I finished breakfast, Lucien made sure I ate all my medicines then scooped me in his arms and carried me to the bathroom. “Put me down! I’m quite capable of walking,” I protested.

“Nope, doctor’s orders remember? Complete bed rest, no stress or physical activities for at least two days. This is only day one. You need to go anywhere, I’ll carry you. I’ll even help you bathe and dress,” he said with a cheeky look on his face.

“The doctor did not order that!” I retorted.

“Just part of my excellent bedside manner,” Lucien replied grinning.

Lucien kicked the bathroom door opened and carried me in. Letting me down he asked, “You want me to draw you a bath or start the shower?”

“Get. Out” I said through gritted teeth.

“Darling, I only want to make sure you’re okay. What if you get dizzy and fall or something?”

“Lucien, you’re stressing me out. Get out! Now!” I yelled.

“Bill will blame me if anything happened to you,” he said sadly shaking his head.

“Something will happen to you if you don’t get out now,” I threatened my eyes narrowing to slits.

Grinning widely, he left the bathroom.

While I was in the shower I heard the bathroom door open and Lucien said, “I brought your towel. Are you done?”

“No I’m not!” I shrieked from the shower. “Leave the towel and get out, and lock the door!”

“Okay, I’m going. You don’t have to burst my eardrums.”

When I came out of the bathroom, Lucien was leaning against the wall outside. “Done?” he asked, scooping me in his arms and carried me to my room.

“You’re really going to carry me about?” I asked wonderingly. “I thought you were joking.”

“I’d never joke about taking care of you Sara. I’m going to do everything I can to keep you safe from harm.”

I looked at his serious, beautiful face and felt like crying again. I’ve been doing a lot of that lately.

When I walked out Lucien was in the kitchen cleaning up. He saw me and quickly came and scooped me up in his arms. “You should have called me,” he said walking to the sofa and dropping me gently on it then sat beside me.

“How do you feel? Still have a headache?”

“A bit. I’m sure it’ll be fine soon, especially with the excellent nurse I have,” I said with a smile.

“Your wish is my command, my darling, my love,” he said seriously, looking deep into my eyes. Putting his arm around me, he pulled me close and ran his fingers through my hair.

I looked away quickly before I drowned in those eyes and I couldn’t afford to do that. We had a few issues to settle and I had to keep a clear head. Pulling his arm away from around my shoulders, I turned to look at him.

“Lucien, where do you see us going from here?”

“I see us… together Sara. Forever.”

I looked intently at his face, trying to detect any signs of falsehood. He looked back at me, clear eyed, earnest and serious.

“I’m not going to try and convince you to trust me with words but I am going to show you that I mean everything I say. I promise you Sara Danilov, that I will never, ever do anything to hurt you, not intentionally. If unknowingly, an action or word of mine hurts you, I want you to tell me immediately and I’ll do everything I can to put it right. As long as I live, I’ll never break this promise.

“This relationship will be on your terms, whatever you say I’ll follow. Just don’t ask me to leave you because I can’t do that.”

My throat choked up listening to him. As I looked into his serious eyes and his earnest face, the defenses I’d put up to protect my heart, crumbled more.

“Oh Lucien,” I said and I caressed his cheek. He turned his head to place a burning kiss on my palm.

“Somebody up there must love me very much to send you to me,” I whispered with tears in my eyes.

“Somebody down here loves you very much too.”

My cell phone rang then, it was my mom. Billy had called my family, telling them about last night and mom wanted to make sure I was alright. I assured her I was fine.

<“Are you really okay Sara? Do you want us to come down?”> Mom still sounded worried.

“Mom, you don’t need to do that, I’m fine. Billy’s coming to see me after work so I’m being taken care of. Don’t worry.”

<“Are you alone at your apartment?”>

“No, I’ve got a friend with me”

<“Lucien?”>

“How do you know about Lucien?! Billy’s been blabbing again, hasn’t he?” I asked hotly. Trust Billy! Why can’t my family just butt out of my life? That’s the reason I came here, so they wouldn’t be too close. Apparently it isn’t far enough.

<“Sara, stop being so childish. We’re all just concerned about you,”> mom replied calmly.

I hate when she does this to me. Whenever I lose my temper, mom’s calmness will always make me feel like an impossible spoiled child.

<”Can I talk to him?”>

“What for?” I asked suspiciously.

<”Because I’m your mother and I care about you. I like to know who your friends are”>

Damn! Now she’s making me feel guilty.

“Mom wants to talk to you,” I said passing the phone to Lucien.

Lucien’s eyebrows rose in surprise. They talked for a few minutes and he passed the phone back to me.

<“Lucien’s sounds like a very nice young man. Why don’t you bring him next time we have a family do?”>

Yeah right! No way am I going to bring Lucien to the circus the family do always turns into when someone brings a boyfriend or girlfriend.

“We’ll see mom,” I answered diplomatically instead and after a few more pleasantries, we said our good byes.

“Mom likes you.”

“I like your mother too.”

“That still doesn’t make you my boyfriend!”

Lucien sighed. “Okay Sara, I said we’ll do this your way and if you say I’m not your boyfriend, then I’m not. I’m just a friend who loves you with all his heart. Is that okay with you?”

“Since you’re not my boyfriend, I’m free to go out with other guys, right?” I asked. I wanted to see how far I could push him and if he really meant it when he said he’d let me set the terms for this relationship.

He looked at me with such a hurt look that I wanted to take my words back but hardened my heart. “Yes Sara, I’m not your boyfriend and you’re free to go out with other guys,” he agreed quietly.

Damn, damn, and double damn! My heart was breaking seeing the hurt look on his face.

“Fine then, that’s the way it’ll be,” I said flippantly.

“But I’m staying here with you and I’m not letting you out of my sight because I promised your mom and Bill that I’m going to take care of you,” he said looking steadily at me.

“How am I going to go out with other guys if you’re going to be my shadow and-- and staying with me?” I asked annoyed.

“I said you’re free to go out with other guys, not bring them back to the apartment.”

“Is this how you’re going to ‘follow what I say’?” I quoted his promise back to him in a hard voice.

“Fine, tell me when you want to bring a guy back and I’ll sleep on the sofa,” he replied grimly.

“What about this ‘not letting me out of your sight’ business?”

“Don’t worry, I won’t interrupt or even eavesdrop on what you’re doing. I’ll stay some distance away but I’m not letting you out of my sight!” he replied in a hard angry voice.

We were both glaring at each other by then.

Finally Lucien looked away and his shoulders slumped down dejectedly. He gave himself a little shake and stood up. “I’m going to my room to get my stuff,” he said without looking at me. “I won’t be gone long, will you be alright?” he turned to look at me but his face was expressionless and I couldn’t read his eyes.

“Yes,” I replied quietly.

He left, closing the door softly. I was so wrung out from this morning’s emotional roller coaster that I didn’t know what to feel anymore. I let my mind drift and my tired body took over and I fell asleep.

When Lucien got back, he found Sara curled up on the sofa asleep. He sat, looking at her sleeping and thought about this morning. He was hurting and the thought of her with another guy was like acid eating his insides. But he’d made her a promise and he’d keep his promise even if he died trying. He loved this woman so much and he wanted her to be happy. He hoped that one day, she’d love him the way he loved her because the thought of not being with her made his soul cry out in anguish.

Lucien picked her up from the sofa and cradled her sleeping body close to his, loving the feel of her in his arms and carried her to the bedroom.

Billy came over that evening and brought dinner. Mike and Barry were there with Helen, Lucien and me and we sat around joking and talking. It was a fun evening, the few times I’d let down my guard and relaxed and it felt good!

Towards the end of the evening, Billy told us how my case was going. He said I might not even have to appear in court since the evidence clearly point that Blake attacked me first and it was self defense. The only trouble was Blake’s extensive injuries. I shouldn’t have hurt him that badly.

“You really need to control that nasty temper of yours, you know,” Billy said, shaking his head at me. I gave him a raspberry and grinned.

“And you really need to start acting like an adult,” he continued sighing.

I gave him another raspberry! The others were laughing by then.

“I give up!” Billy said exasperated.

I went to Billy, climbed into his lap and hugged him with my head on his shoulders. “You can’t give up on me Billy. Who else can I depend on to bail me out if I get into trouble?” I asked in a little girl voice.

Billy rudely shoved me off his lap and I landed butt first on the floor. “That hurt! I’m supposed to get tender loving care at the moment!” I yelled at Billy.

“You get more than enough of that from Lucien,” he snorted. “What you need is good spanking.”

I gave him another long, noisy raspberry, stuck my fingers in my ears and waggled them.

Everybody was laughing uproariously by then, tears streaming down their faces. After a while Billy and I started laughing too.

Last night I had been asleep when Lucien got into bed with me but tonight I wasn’t sure how I was suppose to act. I’d always been told that the best defense is a good offense… Lucien walked in then.

“You’re not sleeping here, you’re sleeping on the sofa,” I told him.

He closed the door and looked at me steadily. “I promised I’ll follow everything you say but I also said the one thing I will not do is leave you.”

“This is not leaving me! You’ll still be here except you’re sleeping on the sofa and not in here,” I retorted.

“I’m not letting you out of my sight either,” he replied calmly.

“What could possibly happen to me here?! You think I’m going to leave the apartment through my bedroom window?” I said, shaking my head in exasperation.

“I’m sleeping in here,” he said walking to the bed and started removing his clothes.

I glared at him while he calmly took off his shirt and tossed it on the chair. He sat down on the bed removed his shoes and socks then loosened his belt unzipped his jeans and slowly pushed them down. He tossed his jeans on the chair as well. Only his boxers remained by now. Looking steadily at me as he hooked his fingers in the waistband and removed his shorts. His cock sprang free standing straight up from its nest of dark blonde curls.

I was blushing profusely by then but looked straight into his eyes and refused to look away.

He calmly got into bed and holding the covers up said huskily, “Join me?”

Damn him! Fine, if he could play it cool, so can I!

I slowly removed my clothes and put them away neatly. For all my bravado I kept my back to Lucien as I did this. I put on my usual nightwear of silk shorts and sleeveless top. I might as well not be wearing anything as the shorts and top barely covered the essentials!

I switched off the light and got into bed. Lucien pulled the covers over us and immediately put his arms around me. He started raining soft kisses all over my face and I stiffened and pushed him away.

“You may be sleeping in my bed but I never agreed to have sex with you,” I told him in a hard voice.

“We’re not having sex,” he replied softly pulling me back and continued kissing me.

“Lucien don’t!” and pushed him firmly away.

He sighed. “You don’t want to have sex, then we won’t Sara. I just want to love you,” he said pleadingly.

“I’m not ready to love you.”

He sighed sadly when he heard that. “Very well. Good night then Sara,” and he kissed me softly on my forehead and pulled me close. I could feel his erection, hard and hot on my stomach but Lucien remained still, his skin hot against mine. It felt so good and somehow right to be held in Lucien’s arms. His hard length pressed tightly against me, my cheek resting on chest.

I could feel Lucien’s hurt like a tangible thing hovering between us. Time and time again I had pushed him away and hurt him with my words but still Lucien stayed, offering me his love, taking care of me, remaining calm even when I was being impossible. And never pushing for more than I was willing to give. Why can’t I stop being defensive and love him the way he deserved to be loved?