Same Old Lang Syne

We got back into our routines, but I couldn't help reminiscing about the weekend. It was probably the most peaceful, relaxing, and fulfilling time that I had ever spent. And to spend it with the girl who had captured my heart was something that I could have never imagined six months ago.

It was really the first time that we had spent a whole weekend together, just the two of us, out and away from all distractions. It gave us time to talk. I mean

really

talk. I had never been really good at expressing my feelings. Go figure... I'm a guy. I was glad that I broached the subject of, at some point, moving in together. I was equally delighted, but not surprised, that Sam had been thinking of it also.

.......................................

My mom was having a picnic for the family, for no particular reason. Just a chance for everybody to get together: cousins, nieces, nephews, grandparents... the whole clan.

We got there early, as Sam figured that my mom might appreciate some help.

We all sat at the outside picnic table as we had our light lunch before getting into the whole picnic prep mode. When I wasn't staring at my food, I would look over to see Sam's beaming face looking back at me. I couldn't help but smile. Our hands found each other's under the table. None of this went unnoticed by my parents.

We shared a few details about our weekend at the cabin. A lake-side cabin was something that my dad had dreamed about. One that was a comfortable drive where it could be reached in a few hours. The more that I described the setting and the layout of the cabin, I could see him, at some point finding one. Everybody laughed when Sam proudly announced that she had caught more and larger fish than I did. We each looked at each other and knew those were the only details of that adventure that we were going to share.

Sam and my mom disappeared into the kitchen. Unbeknownst to me, it would give them time to get to know each other, which is why Sam wanted to get here early. So, I helped my dad clean and set up the grill and his outside mini-bar.

My dad and I had never really talked about any of my girlfriends or my relationships throughout my high school years. For some reason, it was my mom that I talked to the day that Michelle broke my heart, which I knew that she shared with him. Still, I think that he wished that he and I had a closer relationship, more like "friends" than "father and son".

Then, out of nowhere.

"She's quite a girl," as he nonchalantly continued to clean the grill.

"Yes, she is. I've never met anyone like Samantha. Never felt anything like I feel when we are together. And, that it all happened so randomly. We talk about it a lot."

It was quiet for a few moments. My dad quietly doing his grill. My mind drifted to that special girl who had captured my heart.

Then.

"She's the one, isn't she?" he said, turning and looking me in the eyes with a warm 'fatherly' smile. "After what you went through with Michelle, I prayed as the years went by, that whoever she would be, that she'd intersect with your life someday... somehow, and that you would know it when she did. It took a while, but you found each other and she's here. Samantha is that part of you that you never even knew was missing until you met her."

"She is. I've never felt a connection like the connection that we share. We enjoy all of our time together. We feel comfortable around each other. I've never been happier, and I know that Sam feels the same. We find that sometimes, we don't really have to talk to each other. It's like we can

feel

what each other is feeling or thinking. Sometimes, it's just comforting to sit next to each other in silence. Just enjoying the closeness. We're taking things slow. Not sure where things are going to take us."

"Nothing wrong with taking it easy. Moving too fast is a really good way for one, or both of you, to get hurt, and I would hate to see that for either of you. You two are good for each other."

Then in a reflective pause, he continued.

"I firmly believe that when it's time for two souls to meet, that there's nothing on earth that can prevent them from meeting. No matter where each may be located. And you and Samantha are just that... soulmates."

I looked up with a questioning look.

"But how could you know that? This is only the second time that you've met her. Only the second time that you've seen us together. And the soulmate thing is something that

we

only recently realized and discovered."

Just then, the left corner of his mouth drew upward, almost imperceptibly, followed by a half-smile. A smile that I had seen in rare moments like these, when he was about to explain something profound, which may have seemed complicated; but to him, unknowably: simple, clear, and in a few words.

"Your mom and I saw it when you first introduced her to us. But, now... Now it's stronger. You'd have to be blind, not to see what is building between the two of you. When you two look at each other, it's like there's an invisible thread that binds the two of you. I've never seen anything like it. Cherish it. Don't let anything, or

anyone

, break that thread. It's more precious than life itself. Because it

is

life. "

He paused, and then looked at me with those eyes that were so full of wisdom.

"If there's one thing I know, it's that true love is hard to find. If you find it, hold onto it. Never let go. It's harder to find than you think."

Wow. My dad was one insightful person. Something that I never knew, as he never openly displayed it. Now, I felt guilty for not sharing my innermost feelings with him, as I grew up.

"Thank you, dad. That means a lot to me. More than you could ever know. I'm sorry that I didn't share much with you as I grew up. I should have. You always had time and room in your schedule to do so much for me. I don't know how to ever repay you for all of that."

"Just keep us in your life. You never know where the path of life will take you. All you can do is to make sure that, wherever it leads, that you have the person that you hold near and dear to your heart, at your side. Once you do that, everything else will either fall into place, or it never really mattered at all."

I stood and hugged him as my eyes welled up. I couldn't remember the last time that I had hugged him. It wouldn't be the last. My dad was one wise man. I could only hope, and pray, that as I aged, that I could develop a fraction of that wisdom.

The picnic was fun. Sam was the hit with my relatives that I knew she would be. I don't know how many times I relayed how we met. They were intrigued that Sam was an Obstetrics nurse in a major hospital. It warmed my heart, to watch Sam play with my cousin's young children, ranging in age from two to six. Sam had a way with kids. And in the future... our children.

We needed a break. I took Sam's hand and guided her down a path to the lower field, out of sight from the rest of the group. I held her in the quiet of the day. The wind gently swirled her honey-blonde hair. In the sunlight, the hazel element of her eyes, being overshadowed by the green, made them look like two emeralds.

"This is so nice. Out here. Everything so open... so quiet... so peaceful."

"You want to know a little secret of mine?" I grinned.

"Secret? Somehow, I have a feeling that you did something naughty out here when you were growing up," she grinned back at me.

"Not naughty... maybe a bit extreme... See that grove of trees over there?"

Sam followed my gaze as I point off to the north toward a grove of trees that sat on a little knoll about a quarter mile away across the field. The nice thing was, that the way that the farm was situated, the closest neighbor out here was about a mile away.

"When I would be home for my summer breaks from school, I would walk over there... naked. The first time I did that, I discovered a large flat rock, next to the creek. It looked like it that had been uncovered when they took out all of the willow trees. The fascinating thing about that was that it left a large crater that had filled with water. It wasn't really deep enough to swim in, but it came, to maybe hip-high. It felt nice on a hot summer day. Then lay out on the rock to dry off. The feeling of the warm sun and gentle breeze on all of my stuff was beyond wonderful. I think that there were a couple of summers that I went back to school without any tan lines."

Sam gave me playful smile, "Knowing you, I can totally believe that. And you know what? I would love to do that too, with you. Except for what we did at the cabin, I've never done something like that. To be way out here in the open. So free. Bare to the world."

.................................................

On our return to Sam's apartment, I relayed my dad's and my conversation. When I got to the 'Invisible Thread' part, I saw Sam wipe her eyes and went quiet for a few moments.

"Your mom said something similar, when we were inside, about seeing the connection that they first noticed when I was here before, and how it's gotten stronger. I can't believe that people can see what we have and share together. Now, I

really

can't wait to get together with my parents, to see if they see the same thing and say something."

A week later. We did, and they did. It brought more tears to Sam's eyes, along with the conversation that she had with her mom, when they had a bit of mother-and-daughter alone time. Sam said that they had always been pretty close. But after moving away, and not taking the time to visit, she missed that close time with her.

While mother and daughter spent some quality time together, Sam's dad and I got to know each other. He said that he couldn't remember the last time that he had seen Sam so happy and content. He knew of some of the details about Sam's emotional issues at the hospital, which had been relayed to him from Sam's telephone conversations with her mom. He also knew that I was always there for her. I got a warm smile.

On our way back, we both knew that we needed to find a way to get both sets of parents together to meet and get to know each other. We each knew that they would hit it off. But, where and how? Mine being 45 minutes away and Sam's an hour and a half, in the opposite direction.

...............................................

The Park District's karate class was geared as an introductory class, to let people try it to see if it was something that they would like to pursue. At the end of the second set of classes, Sensei gathered those of us, who had been in his previous classes, together as he wanted to talk with us, away from the group. He explained that if we wanted to go forward, that he recommended joining his evening class in his own dojo. That way, he could offer more one-on-one and in-depth instruction to refine and develop our skills. Plus, he would be able to develop the required mental disciple, which was something that he couldn't adequately work on through the current introductory classes. He went on and said that we were all basically a bit above the Orange Belt level and that with the one-on-one instruction, in probably six months, or so, we could earn our Green Belt, if we decided to join his class. Looking at Sam, he added that he was impressed with our devotion, seriousness, and the respect that we gave during his classes. He hoped that we would decide to go forward.

I knew that even without the rest of the group, Sam and I would continue. I had a feeling that Sam would progress at a faster rate than me, and I was fine with that. I knew her real reason for continuing.

Sitting at the bar, after the class, the group was unanimous to continue.

.........................................

Over the next few months, our work-life consumed our days, and over the weekends, we consumed each other.

Even though Sam had been at the hospital for a little less than a year, she had earned the respect and admiration of her fellow nurses. Her interaction and empathy with those sporadic emotionally-draining cases drew the attention of her supervisors and many of the doctors. At times, she helped out in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, but Sam admitted that she couldn't do that every day.

There were those occasional 12:30 in the morning phone calls, resulting in me holding my sobbing girlfriend as she went through the happenings of her day. It always included me holding Sam under the warm shower and massaging her temples, tight neck, and shoulder muscles followed by intimate spooning and falling asleep. Still, Sam wouldn't trade her career for anything. She truly loved it.

...............................

I took to the design software, which the company had purchased some months ago, like a duck to water. The initial training allowed me to explore new ways to utilize the software, in ways that went beyond its original intended usage by the company. My supervisors were pleased, to say the least. While the sister companies had purchased the same software, they had not discovered how to utilize it, beyond its intended purpose. That led to me visiting each company, spending an initial week there to get a feel for their design process, along with follow-up trips. Which led to me having my security clearance changed to the next level. While we were sister companies, each had its own niche with our common clients. The intent was to make us all look like "One Company".

I think those trips, now becoming more frequent, started to bother Sam. Maybe,

bother

isn't quite correct, maybe

concerned

may be a better term. Concerned that an opportunity for a transfer may be on the horizon... A distant horizon, but a horizon, nonetheless. We hadn't really talked about that, except for that one time when I told her that I would never go anywhere without her, because I loved her and was hopelessly in love with her.

It was just a feeling that I had. Again, the little voices in my brain

talking

to me.

I needed to have a special romantic dinner-night for Sam... for Samantha. I needed to revisit what we had talked about a number of months ago, and offer her reassurance that she would always be a part of my life, no matter what.

During our mid-week get-together, after our class, I asked Sam if she'd like to come over Saturday night, for a nice intimate dinner. She grinned.

"So, I get to see how domesticated you are?"

"I'll do my best. No promises."

"What do you want me to bring?"

"Just you."

Then, grinning and biting her lower lip, "Am

I

going to be the dessert?"

"Do you want to be the dessert?"

"Maybe," the grin had turned... playful. Sam's eyes sparkled with that thought.

All I could do was grin back, as erotic thoughts of how I was going to prepare and savor my dessert flowed into my vivid and active imagination. We were going to have fun.

...........................................

I didn't have the culinary skills that Sam did. I needed something simple, but nice. Unfortunately, I had only the basic single-guy cooking stuff: stove, frying pan, and crock pot. I needed help. I could call my mom for ideas, or, I could hit the meat manager at the local grocery store. I went for the latter.

Coming out of the store I was pleased with what I came up with for our dinner: baked potatoes, green garden salads, and then butterflied lobster tails. The meat manager said they were easy, just be careful not to leave them under the broiler for too long.

I also had the ingredients for dessert... for

our

dessert.

Like before, I suggested that we dress a bit less casual. Sam readily agreed with another twinkle in her eyes. I was pretty sure that she knew that our dinner-date was going to be fun, no matter how she dressed.

Opening the door, I stood there, stunned at what was standing before me. It wasn't Sam... It wasn't even Samantha....It was Samantha Grace. Her blonde hair had a soft golden shine that hung to her shoulders. The small amount of makeup that was applied, was done to perfection. Her hazel-green eyes were outlined with black eyeliner. Each delicate eyelash separated. Her eyebrows were thin and the color of honey. And then there were those lips... soft, light pink with just a hint of lip gloss.

Tonight, Sam wore a simple light blue cashmere sweater with a gentle "V" neckline. The soft material hugged her firm braless breasts. Dark blue slacks with a wide white belt accentuated her tiny waist. When she turned, my eyes were drawn to the way the slacks hung off each of her firm little butt cheeks. She caught me looking and grinned.

I don't think that I had taken a breath since opening the door.

"Sam... Samantha... You're so beautiful. I think you get more beautiful each time I see you."

Sam looked down as she blushed. I loved it.

"Thank you. It was fun doing all of the makeup stuff. I don't think that I've ever gone to this extent. But, I just wanted to do something special for you, knowing that you were going to do something

special

for me. I know that you love the "Sam look" and the "Samantha look". Tonight, I wanted to give you the "Samantha

Grace

look".

The meal was hit. The lobster tails turned out great. Sam loved the baked potatoes and garden salad. Then I had warm bread... from a package. I wasn't

that

domesticated. Accompanied by a nice Chardonnay, Sam was duly impressed.

Sitting across from her at my little kitchen table. The soft candlelight bathed her face in a soft glow. Her hazed-green eyes shined like two gemstones. I held up my glass to toast my girlfriend.

"Samantha. Our future will be bright and glittering with diamonds because you will be in it. To my girlfriend. To my lover. To my Soulmate."

Sam's eyes welled up as she reached across the table and clasped my hand in hers.

"Thank you, Bill. I don't know what to say, except... I love you. Nobody has ever done something like this for me. You surprise me every time I turn around. I like it when we are alone like this and away from everything. These times are different from our usual times together. The time I made you dinner. The weekend at the cabin. Tonight. Closeness Times... Bonding Times."

"I felt that we needed to have a quiet and romantic time together. I've been feeling like you've been a bit anxious these last few weeks, with all of my out-of-town trips."

Sam was quiet as she looked down for a few seconds, before looking back up at me with those soft hazel-green eyes.

"You know me so well. Most guys wouldn't have picked up on that. I was trying to hide it, but yes, I have been. I don't know why... well, maybe I do."

"You want me to tell you what

I

think is concerning you?"

I held her hands in mine and was gently rubbing my thumbs over the back of her hands.

Sam just gave a small nod.

"You're concerned that I may get offered a position at one of the sister companies."

Sam looked down again for a few seconds, then back at me with a little grin.

"Like I said a couple of minutes ago... You know me so well. Yes. That's been on my mind these last few weeks. I'm happy and extremely proud of you that you're doing so well. It's kind of scary. I mean at the cabin you asked if I'd be open to us living together, at some point down the road, and I said that I was."

"I think that your exact words were, as your warm, bare, and sexy body was snuggling up next to mine, 'I could get used to waking up next to you'."

Sam grinned, "Yes. Those were my exact words. And I meant it. As much then, as now."

"I know. And I could used to waking up and looking over at you... watching you sleep. Watching you dream. Listening to you breathe. To lean over and kiss your forehead as you sleep. And then when you wake, your scattered blonde hair, the early-morning radiant glow. Your sweet face, all-natural, with the 'Sam' look that I love so much," Sam blushed. It was cute.