Reflections on Ice

When Cassia woke up, she heard the familiar sounds of Kyle's video game. She rolled her head to one side, looking for Dylan and frowned when she didn't see him in bed. She sat up, her eyes going to the floor, where she remembered him tossing his clothes the night before. His socks were there, but nothing else.

Well, he wouldn't leave without his socks.

There was a shout from the front room, a familiar voice. Cassia smiled and sat up. She pulled on her sweatpants and shirt, scraped her hair into a ponytail and walked out of her bedroom.

"I can't believe you just blew up that truck."

Kyle let out a giddy laugh. "That was awesome."

Cassia stood by the end of the couch, arms crossed over her chest, and watched them play for a minute. "I'm glad to see you guys are having fun."

"Hey, Cass." Kyle didn't even look up from the television.

Dylan jumped up and wrapped his arms around Cassia. "Good morning."

Cassia's cheeks warmed but she hugged him back. "Good morning. How long have you been up?"

"Not long. Maybe an hour. Kyle was struggling so I thought I'd help him out."

"Struggling." Kyle scoffed. "I was fine."

"Your avatar was bleeding from his eyeballs."

Cassia let Dylan get back to his game, he and Kyle arguing about the accuracy of Dylan's claim. She made some coffee and toast and sat on the other chair, watching her brother and Dylan argue and play that damn game. She should be annoyed that Dylan was ignoring her in favor of blowing up imaginary trucks and aliens, but she loved seeing her brother and boyfriend getting along so well.

Hiding her smile behind her coffee mug, Cassia marveled over how much had changed in such a short time. She would never had thought that wretched night at Tapley's would have led to this.

"What's so funny?"

She met Dylan's eyes and shook her head. It hadn't been too soon for him to do what he'd done to her last night but it was definitely too soon for her to confess everything she was feeling.

A short while later, Cassia walked Dylan out to the hall, and he faced her with that sexy crooked smile.

"I had a lot of fun last night."

Cassia grinned. "So did I."

Dylan tugged his jacket on and pulled her close for a kiss. "What are you doing tonight?"

"No plans. What did you have in mind?"

He kissed her again and she slid her arms around his neck. "I like that. We can do that."

Dylan chuckled. "I think it's time I told Tristen to get his own place."

"Or I should tell Kyle he needs to move out." Cassia smiled and gave Dylan a quick kiss before stepping back. "But even if all we do tonight is go to a movie and get some pie after, I'd be happy."

"I'll keep that in mind." Dylan glanced at his watch. "I'll call you when practice is done."

"OK. Have a good practice."

Dylan nodded, stole another quick kiss and hurried down the hall. He was already running late. Cassia watched him go before turning back into the apartment.

"Thanks for being so nice to Dylan."

Kyle barely looked up from his game. "He's cool."

Cassia smiled and shook her head. "High praise."

Kyle did look up, his game pausing as he clicked a button. "Is he going to be staying over a lot from now on?"

"What?"

"Well, I mean, your apartment isn't huge, Cass." Kyle shrugged. "Maybe it would be better if I moved out."

"I'm not going to tell you to move because I have a boyfriend now." Even though she had just joked with about telling Kyle that very thing, she wouldn't force her brother out. She'd let him stay as long as he needed, until he was set up in a different place.

"I know that." Kyle sighed and put his controller down as he rubbed his face with one hand. "But I can't stay here forever. I'd never intended too, anyway."

"I know that." Cassia sat on the end of the couch. "If you want to move out, I'm fine with that, but don't go if you're not ready. I don't want you struggling and eating nothing but crackers and jam."

"No. I won't." He cleared his throat. "Actually, Tyler and I were talking about getting a place."

Cassia's eyes widened. "Are you that serious already?"

Kyle shrugged. "We've been seeing each other since my sophomore year."

"Oh wow. I had no idea."

"No one did. Obviously." He looked up, his expression tense. "But I need your help."

"With what?"

"I need to tell Mom and Dad."

Cassia nodded. "And the twins."

Kyle made a face but nodded as well. "Yeah. Everyone."

"What do you need me for?"

"Will you be there when I do?"

"Of course." Cassia reached out and put her hand on his arm. "You know I'll be there for you."

Kyle let out a breath. "Thanks, Cass."

"Why don't you suggest a family dinner, this weekend."

"This weekend?" When Cassia nodded, Kyle looked down. "I guess. There's not much point in putting it off."

"Well, think about it." Cassia squeezed his arm and stood up. "I won't push."

As she walked away, Kyle raised his voice. "In the meantime, you and Dylan need to stay off the couch."

Cassia laughed.

****

The Stars left on a four-game road trip the next day. Dylan called Cassia every night. He didn't even care if anyone overheard him. There was no reason that he shouldn't be talking to his girlfriend. His

real

girlfriend. The thought still made him shake his head in wonder.

After a particularly grueling match-up against the Edmonton Oilers, Dylan was sore and exhausted and wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed. Still, he called Cassia when he'd locked himself in his hotel room following the game.

"Hey, you." Cassia's voice was sympathetic. "I'm so sorry about the game."

Dylan groaned and covered his eyes with one hand. "Thank you. It was awful."

"I saw that hit you took in the third. Are you all right?"

"Yeah." Dylan relived the moment when he'd dropped his shoulder and lost sight of the Oiler right before he slammed him into the boards. He had a colorful bruise on his left side now, and a few other aches and pains that he'd be feeling for another few days. "It was my fault."

"How is getting hit your fault?"

Dylan smiled at her indignation. At least he knew she was on his side. "I didn't keep track of him so I couldn't avoid him when he came at me."

"Hmm." Cassia sniffed. "Well, he also didn't need to hit you."

He laughed. "You've told me how many times that you're a life-long hockey fan. How can you say he didn't need to hit me. It's hockey!"

She laughed with him. "I guess I don't like seeing my boyfriend getting tossed around."

"Hey. He did not toss me around." Though Dylan couldn't deny he felt like he'd been tossed around. "But enough about me. How was your day?"

She let out a breath. "Oh, I've had better."

"What happened?"

"Well, you remember I told you about the dinner at my parents' place on Sunday? And Kyle came out to them?"

"Yeah. You said it went well. Everyone was supportive."

"They were. Or they said they were. Then today, at work, Kyle came by to get my key because he'd locked himself out of the apartment." She paused and took a deep breath. "And he was chatting with my dad for a minute, and then Tyler showed up. I guess he'd been waiting in the car or something."

"OK." Dylan frowned, unsure of where this was going, and already feeling concerned for Cassia and her brother.

"Kyle introduced them and Dad was fine. Then Kurt came over and made some crack about being all right with Kyle being gay but not that he'd left college for a guy."

"He left college because of Tyler?"

Cassia sighed. "I still don't know why he left college. I never pressed for information but after seeing him with Tyler, I did wonder if that had something to do with it. Anyway, Kurt opened his big mouth, Tyler got kind of upset with Kyle but didn't want to cause a scene in front of the family, and they left."

"That sucks. Tell Kyle I'm sorry he's dealing with so much right now."

"I will. But that wasn't why my day sucked so bad."

"Oh jeez."

"After Kyle and Tyler left, Kurt said I should never have allowed Kyle to move in with me."

"What? Did he expect you to let Kyle live in a box in an alley somewhere?"

"No, he said I should have made him go back to college. That it was stupid to not go to college and I was a terrible influence on Kyle."

"Oh man." Dylan blew out a breath and shook his head. He didn't know her brothers that well, but from what she told him now, he wasn't sure he wanted to get to know them.

"Yeah. He said more but I don't remember it all." Cassia's tone had grown more and more subdued, the longer she went on. Dylan wished he was there to hug her. "And then, to top it all off, we had a last-minute thing for the wedding earlier."

"The wedding is in four days. What else is there to do?"

"Oh, it wasn't anything too major. We got together for one last dinner, just us girls, and got manicures and pedicures."

Dylan smiled. "In my limited experience, those are supposed to be pretty relaxing activities."

"Yeah, well, it was, for the most part. But they were all grilling me about you. Whether you'd be back in time for the wedding, and what you might wear, and if we'd match."

Dylan chuckled. "Wow. I didn't realize I was such a hot topic of conversation."

"You shouldn't be."

"OK." He didn't know what to make of that comment.

"Sorry, I don't mean that they shouldn't care, but it does feel like they're taking a little too much interest in our relationship."

"Well, they're your friends, and you were the last single one."

"Yeah." Cassia groaned and he heard her moving around, the sheets of her bed rustling. "I guess it bothers me that I can't tell them that we're really together. I'd have to explain why it's different now."

"Ah." Dylan nodded as he put an arm behind his head, reclining on his own pillows. "I understand."

"I even tried to change the subject, and told them about Kyle, Tyler, and what happened at the garage earlier. They decided they agreed with my brother, Kurt, that not going to college is something of a failure."

"What? They actually said that to you?"

"Well, no, not those exact words. But they all went to college and I didn't. They see it as some sort of shortcoming."

"I don't get that. College isn't for everyone."

"You went."

"Yeah, but if I hadn't been hounded into it by my mother, I wouldn't have."

"But you loved it."

"Sure, once I got there, but to this day, I don't know if it was good for me or not."

"Well, at least you'll have some options when you retire."

"Yeah, because so many schools will be clamoring for a washed up hockey player with a twenty-year old degree in English Lit."

"And history."

"Right. Both very useful subjects." Dylan closed his eyes. Sure, he'd enjoyed his college experience for the most part, but he'd also become a more withdrawn and introverted man in the same time period. His real struggles with meeting and getting to know women had all started in college, after all. "You didn't miss out on anything by not going to college, believe me."

"I don't know." Cassia sighed. "All my friends did meet their significant others in college."

Dylan's eyes snapped open. "So you're saying you'd have liked to have met your husband there?"

She let out a short laugh. "No. I probably would have ended up with another winner like Alex."

"Instead, you're stuck with me."

"Not stuck." Cassia's tone was playful now. "I could trade you for another hockey player any moment."

He laughed. "You wish."

"Hey, I could score another player if I wanted to."

"You could." Dylan couldn't deny that. She was incredible. "But no one else can stammer like I do. No one else would be willing to stalk you at the diner night after night."

Cassia laughed as he went on.

"And no one else can do the things to you that we did the other night."

"Mmm. You might be right."

"Or over the phone."

"What?" Her laugh sounded again, stirring parts of his anatomy that he'd managed to keep under control so far. "We've never done anything over the phone."

"Not yet."

There was a beat of silence, taut with tension as he waited for her response. When the silence stretched on, Dylan's heart began to pound and he swallowed before speaking up himself.

"What are you wearing, Cassia?"

She let out a breath. "Are you serious?"

Dylan didn't know. He'd only wanted to steer the conversation away from her jokes about trading him in. He'd never done this with anyone before, and honestly, he'd shocked himself by even suggesting it. Over and over, he surprised himself by saying or doing these things with Cassia. But then, she was perfect, so maybe that made everything easier for him.

"What. Are. You. Wearing."

He heard her sharp inhale and wondered if he was pushing too hard. She came across so confident and it put him at ease most of the time, but sometimes, he couldn't tell if he was pushing her comfort levels, or just surprising her with his words and actions.

"I've got on a tank top and underwear."

Her response was soft, but he could tell that she was breathing harder.

"What kind of underwear?" His mind flipped through a dozen images as he waited for her answer.

"Just plain white cotton."

"Hmm. I kind of like that."

"Do you?"

"Oh yeah." He liked everything about her.

"Would you like it better if I took them off?"

Dylan's breath left him in a rush. He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed back against his pillows, forever thankful to have scored a private room for the night. "God, yes. Take everything off."

"You too, Samuels."

He obliged but refrained from touching himself. "Done."

"You're very good at following orders."

"You have no idea."

Cassia laughed. "I think I'm starting to."

They both fell silent then and Dylan listened to the sound of her breathing, the way it deepened and caught in the next second.

"What are you doing?"

Her laugh was breathless. "What do you think?"

"Jesus." Dylan reached for himself, his fingers closing around his hard-on without a lick of shame. "How does it feel?"

"You should know."

And he did. He really did. It still amazed him that he'd managed to overcome his usual shyness with Cassia that first night.

"I'd be doing more than touching you if I was there right now."

"Would you?" Her breathing hitched again. "Would you be licking me?"

Dylan nodded, his hold tightening. He wasn't going to last long at this rate. Who knew phone sex could be so hot? "I'd be doing everything to you, Cass."

"I'm going to need more detail, Samuels."

Dylan exhaled, feeling his ears growing hot. This was definitely outside his own comfort zone. But he'd started it and because she'd asked, he'd do it. He'd do anything for her.

"I'd hold you down and kiss my way up your thighs. Maybe I'd tease you for a while, licking all around until tasting you for real."

"I like it."

"Then I wouldn't stop until you screamed my name. A couple of times, at least." Dylan stroked himself as he imagined it, imagined his mouth on her as he'd done the week before. The memory was seared in his mind. "Then when you begged me to stop, I'd do it again."

"Mmm."

Now, he pictured her laying in the middle of her bed, naked, legs spread, and a hand between her thighs. He imagined he could almost hear the sound of her fingers sliding back and forth as she pleasured herself.

"I'd only stop when I was ready."

"Ready for what?" Her voice was ragged, her breathing coming so fast already. It spurred Dylan on.

"Ready to be inside you."

"God, yes."

"I wouldn't go slow, either."

"I don't want you to be. I want you to just take me, Dylan."

Dylan groaned at the sound of her breathy demands. His hand moved faster, sensation building in his body.

"I will, Cass. I'd hold your hands down and bite your neck as I take you. I'd go fast and deep, and I wouldn't stop, not ever."

Dylan started to lose track of his words then. He thought he said some more about taking her hard and fast, and the imagery that sprang to mind was sending him closer and closer to his own climax. He held on though, saying whatever he could to get Cassia to react, until she cried out his name and dropped the phone. Then he let go, the rush of his orgasm almost catching him by surprise.

A short while later, he came back to himself, and heard Cassia calling his name, the sound tinny and distant. Turning his head, he saw that he'd dropped his phone as well.

"Hi."

"My God, Samuels." Her voice was hoarse and she sounded as worn out as he felt. "When we met, I never would have thought you'd be so good at this."

"Neither did I." At her laugh, he couldn't help but smile.

"Please tell me you're alone."

Dylan laughed. "Oh yeah. I may be comfortable with you, but there's no way that would have happened if I was sharing a room tonight."

She yawned and Dylan echoed her. "I'm so sleepy now."

"So sleep."

"But I want to stay on the phone with you."

Dylan grinned. "All right. We can stay on the line."

"Mmm, good." She yawned again and said something Dylan didn't quite catch. Then he heard her breathing grow deep and even, and he knew she was asleep.

He was tired himself, and knew he could end the call now, but he discovered he liked listening to her breathing. He recalled how he'd lain awake the week before, watching her sleep, and wished he was there now. Soon enough, he reminded himself. He'd have her back in his arms, and he'd do the things to her that he'd talked about earlier and then he'd hold her while she slept.

He fell asleep, and at some point, the phones cut out, or died, but he slept on, dreaming of the Texas night sky, and Cassia kissing him.

****

Cassia hadn't told Dylan the whole truth about her day. She'd been more bothered than she cared to admit following her conversations with her brothers and her friends. She could deal with Kurt and Kent poking fun at her and even at her relationship with Dylan. Every time someone brought up the subject of college and her lack of experience in that area, she felt more and more inadequate.

It was silly. She'd never really thought she'd missed out on all that much. She hadn't enjoyed schoolwork in high school, and had been content with her circle of friends, never considering that she was missing out on a wider variety of acquaintances. She'd dated plenty, and while she hadn't exactly settled down, she didn't know for sure if she'd have met the One in college or not, no matter what she'd said to Dylan. All the same, she couldn't shake the feeling that she was missing something.

When she and Dylan spoke again the next day, he started telling her some stories from his days at the University of Michigan. She listened, and laughed when he said something funny, and wondered if he thought she was missing out. He'd never made her feel stupid, not by any means, but it was clear, listening to him talk about how he dealt with his workload -- he'd had a double major, after all -- that he was on a whole different level.

How long before he got bored with her basic, mundane life? She worked with cars and lived in an apartment over a donut shop. There was nothing special about her.

"Are you all right?"

She must have gone quiet on him. She cleared her throat, unwilling to share her self-conscious doubts with him. If he didn't think that way about her, she wasn't going to bring it up and plant the seed. "I'm fine. Just tired, I guess."

"You'll feel better once the wedding is over, I bet."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"I'll be home in two days, and I can make sure you get a good sleep."

Cassia couldn't help but smile. While she might be unsure of her merit, Dylan was certainly coming out of his shell. The memory of their previous conversation warmed her, and she shifted on the couch, glad that Kyle wasn't home.

"I think I'd like that." She knew she'd like that. She knew she'd love it, because she'd fallen hard for Dylan and he had no idea. But would sex be all they ever had? She didn't know what else she could offer him.