Playing the Part

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CHAPTER 5

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With Serena gone, I suddenly had time by myself. Before Serena, I didn't mind that so much. I used to have lots of that. I tried to busy myself with housework. I cleaned things. I did laundry. But I couldn't stop thinking about her.

I went grocery shopping. I found Jen at the checkout and got in her line. She frowned as I came up. "You look terrible."

"Well thank you," I said sarcastically. Then I immediately apologized, "I'm sorry. I've got things going on."

She rang up my items. "It's okay. Hey, I'm going to talk to Heather tonight."

I perked up, knowing she meant she was going to come out of the closet to her best friend. "Yeah?"

"Yeah. I talked to Eric a little yesterday. He said the same thing you did, to just be honest. It sucks having to hide myself. I want people to accept me for who I am."

I nodded. "Yes. Exactly." Then I thought about Serena. Am I accepting her the way she is? Or am I trying to force her to be who I want her to be?

I said to Jen, "One more thing," and ran off to the nearby flower case. I picked up some daisies and came back. "Those too," I told Jen.

----

I dropped off the daisies and a note of my own on Serena's front porch. Then I drove off, sending her a quick text message: 'Check your porch.'

My note said:

'Serena - If you need time, it's yours. Whatever you want, whatever you decide, let me know and I'll be there. - Patrick'

----

I expected to have a lonely night. Serena's note had said that she'd talk to me tomorrow. So I was shocked when the doorbell rang around 5:30 that evening.

I hoped it was Serena. I was shocked when I opened the door and saw Eric standing there. "What are you doing here?" I asked with a smile.

He held up a six-pack of beer. "I'm here because of Jen," he started. We sat on the front porch, drinking beer, as he explained that Jen told him I was looking upset at the store, and could use a friend.

"You came all this way just for me?"

"Well, yes, but also to see Jen and talk to her in person. I just left her house a minute ago," he told me. "I gave her a pep talk for tonight."

I nodded. "I hope it goes well," I said.

"So what about you?" asked Eric. "I don't see a certain young blonde around here anywhere."

"Yeah." I didn't tell Eric all the details from the previous night. But I did tell him the bare bones of it: Serena and I were in love, and it scared her to think about it because she knew she'd be leaving.

Eric nodded along, listening to me talk. When I finally finished, he was silent for just a moment. "I did tell you," he finally said.

"I know."

"I'm glad you didn't listen."

"I - What?" That wasn't what I expected him to say. "What do you mean by that?"

"You're in love with a good woman, and she loves you back. That's not a bad thing."

"But she's leaving after the show wraps up."

Eric shrugged. "But you had a good time, right?"

"Yes." I didn't have to think about that one. "We have good times together. She's a good friend, and we have fun."

"So the problem here isn't the love part," Eric pointed out. "Loving each other shouldn't be a problem. The real issue is that she's leaving, and you want her to stay."

I thought about that one. "I know she won't. But I do wish that."

"And, even if you can't solve that particular problem, does that make you love her less?"

"No. I still love her."

"So you still want to be with her, at least for now?"

"Yes," I answered. This is why I loved Eric. He always had a way to talk me through my problems. He was my best man at my wedding to Kelly, and I swore I'd give him the job again if I ever got married again. "But, what if she doesn't want to be with me anymore?" I asked.

He waited for a few seconds, staring off in the distance, past me. "Why don't you ask her that?" he said, pointing that direction.

I turned around and saw Serena on the sidewalk, walking our way. I stood up and met her halfway. "Hi," was all I said.

"Hi."

"I didn't expect you until tomorrow, but I'm glad you're here." I looked down the street. "You didn't drive?"

"No. I felt like walking. And I just, found my way here."

I offered my hand, and thankfully, she took it. I led her to the porch. "Serena, you remember Eric," I said.

Eric stood up and shook her hand. "Nice to meet you in person," he said grinning at both of us.

"Likewise," she responded with a kind smile.

"Well," said Eric, "I should get out of here, let you two talk." He headed for his car.

"Whoa, you've been drinking," I told him, "You're not driving back to the city tonight."

"I'm not going back to the city tonight," he assured us. "I'm staying with my parents, just around the corner. Goodnight!" Then he was gone.

The silence between Serena and I was palpable. I wasn't sure what to say. Neither did she. "Do you want a cup of tea?" I asked, hoping it didn't sound too awkward.

"Tea would be nice, thanks," she answered. We went inside to the kitchen and I put the kettle on.

"Thanks for the flowers," she said.

"Thanks for the muffins," I responded. "They're delicious." I pointed to the remaining muffins, sitting on the counter in a plastic bag to keep them fresh.

"So your note said, whatever I decide," she started, as I grabbed sugar for the tea.

"Yes."

"Even if I decide something you don't like?"

"Even then," I told her. "I can't force you to be someone you're not. A good friend told me that."

"Eric?"

"Jen, actually." Serena gave me a weird look, and I realized I still hadn't told her about what Jen had told me at the lake. "I'm not seeing her," I assured her, and told her Jen, and Heather, and Eric. Serena finally nodded in understanding. "But Jen told me that you are who you are, and I can't change it."

Serena hesitated, but finally said what she wanted to say. "I think... it would be best if we pretended last night didn't happen." I saw tears form on the rim of her eye. "I mean, the sex was great. But the words after."

I didn't want that. I was still in love with her. And I knew, deep down, she felt the same for me. But I couldn't force the issue without scaring Serena away forever. "If that's what you want. Okay."

"Okay." She hugged me closely, and I hugged her back.

As we sipped our tea, she asked me softly, "After this, can I stay here with you? I don't want sex, I just want you to hold me."

I smiled. "As you wish," I told her, and she smiled back. We finished our tea, and I found her an old T-shirt to wear as pajamas. We spooned in my bed, and I felt like I was protecting her from the night.

----

The next morning, I made us some eggs and bacon and coffee, and we finished off the last of the muffins. The nice big breakfast made both of us feel better, or at least less awkward than last night. Things were closer to being back to normal, but I had the nagging feeling in my mind that one wrong move, one wrong word, could spell disaster.

I drove her back to her place, and, as an example of things being back to normal, we had afternoon sex. Followed by shower sex. Frankly, it was hard to keep our hands off each other, but we did our best to abstain following the shower. After all, we were going to dinner with my parents.

I drove us to their house, filling her in on the little details. Phil and Denise Gunderson had lived in Pendleton most of their lives. Phil was an only child, but Denise has a sister, Peggy, who lives on the other side of town. Phil was a salesman at the hardware store. Denise was a teacher. Their idea of a nice weekend was a golf outing on Saturday morning, followed by a nice lunch. Typical parents.

"Am I your girlfriend for them too?" Serena asked, referring to previous conversations.

I shook my head, but then re-thought it. "Well, I told them you're a friend... but my mom's pretty plugged in to the town's rumor mill. She's probably heard we're dating."

"So that's a yes?"

"Yes and no. We'll have to play it by ear."

Of course, my mom loved Serena the moment we got out of the car. And yes, she had heard we were dating. It doesn't take much for that rumor to get around town. Mom was a little irritated that she heard it from friends rather than from me. I told her we were just seeing each other on weekends, when we didn't have rehearsals for the show.

We found my dad inside, nursing a beer, reading the paper. "Hey son!" he called as we came in the living room, and he gave me a big manly hug. "And you must be Serena," he said, taking her hand and kissing it.

"Dad, she's from the city, not France," I said, but Serena was giggling.

"She's a pretty lady, and I'm glad to meet her," my dad argued.

We had pleasant conversation over porkchops and green beans and mashed potatoes. Serena asked if she could see my old room, but I told her they had already converted it into a guest room after I moved out. But my mom did show her some old pictures of me growing up, which satisfied Serena's curiosity.

Meanwhile, I talked to my dad in the other room. "So, labels aside," he told me, "I'm glad to see you dating again."

"It feels good," I agreed with him.

"Are you having sex?"

I frowned. "I don't feel like I have to answer that."

"That's a yes," he said with a grin. I rolled my eyes at him. "Don't worry, I won't give you crap about it. Just be safe, that's all."

"Okay, Dad."

"Seriously, though, it's nice to see you like this. I haven't seen you happy like this since, uh..." he trailed off.

"You can say her name, Dad. Since I was with Kelly."

"Yeah, well, you know what I mean. Before she stepped out on you."

"Right," I nodded. I had been happy with Kelly at first. Things came crashing down when she left. It took me a while to get back to a normal life.

"And," Dad added, "I can't wait to see you and Serena on stage on Friday night."

"Me too, Dad. Front row, remember. I got you seats with Eric."

"Eric's a good boy," my dad reminisced. "Shame he couldn't find a nice girl." I glared at him, but he was grinning. "That's a joke, son, lighten up."

When we left, my mom hugged Serena. "So good to meet you!" she exclaimed. "Now we'll see you on Friday. Opening night! So exciting!"

"I can't wait for you two to see it," Serena answered. "Patrick's doing an amazing job."

"Only because I have a great partner," I responded. I hugged my mom, and my dad managed to shake Serena's hand without kissing it this time, and we were on our way.

"That wasn't so bad," I said.

"I like your parents," said Serena. "They're so proud of you."

"I'm sure your dad's proud of you too," I told her.

"Frank? He's proud of himself. Let's not talk about Frank."

"Okay. Are you ready for tech week?" Tech week was the week before the show opened. We had serious dress rehearsals for the next four nights, prior to Friday's show.

"Yes. I'm so ready."

"Are you ready for the Gala?"

Serena paused. "Gala?"

"Chuck didn't tell you about the Gala?" I asked, and she shook her head. I explained, "We do it every year. Every summer show, there's a big party on the Saturday afternoon of the first weekend. Some people, big donor types, skip opening night and come on Saturday instead, so they can dress up and be important and then see the Saturday night show."

She thought about it for a while. "I don't think I have a dress for that." She rubbed her temple. "I'll have to go shopping this week. How dressy do people get for this?"

"It's pretty formal. Guys wear suits. Women wear formal dresses."

Serena smiled. "Good. I like having a reason to dress up sometimes." I started having thoughts of Serena in a formal ballgown.

I pulled into Serena's driveway. She started getting out of the car, and noticed I wasn't. "What's wrong?"

"I can't stay over tonight. Work tomorrow morning," I told her.

"So don't stay over. But come inside," Serena said. Then her face changed into a sexy look. "I'd really like it if you came inside," she said to me, making sure I got her double-entendre, then headed for the door. I quickly got out of the car, and followed her.

We locked lips as soon as we were both in the living room. I picked her up into my arms and carried her to the bedroom. My hands roved under her skirt and grabbed her behind, slightly surprised to touch bare flesh, as she'd been wearing a thong. Her arms were wrapped around my neck, holding my mouth to hers. I finally reached the bed, and sat down on it, with her in my lap. Our kissing continued, and she started grinding her pelvis into me. She broke the kiss only to grunt under her breath, "Fuck me now."

I had to reach under her and undo my pants, and shift them down to my knees. Then I was able to pull her thong aside, and my fingers slipped into her warm wetness, making her gasp into my lips. My fingers rubbed her there while our tongues continued to explore each other's mouths. She'd already given me the green light, but I wanted her to say it again. She finally broke the kiss and stared into my face. "Please fuck me."

"I need a condom."

She groaned. "Dammit. Why are you so noble?" She dismounted me and found a condom in the drawer of her bedside table. She pushed me backwards so I was laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, and I felt her roll the latex over my erection. I looked over to see her peel off her thong, and then she climbed on top of me and kissed me again.

I slipped my hand down and, finding her still very much wet, I aimed my dick at her entrance and pushed inside. This elicited a moan from Serena, whose lips were still pressed against mine. I gave her a few slow startup thrusts before I started to put more effort into it. But, given the position, I wasn't able to get good leverage, and she was getting frustrated. She stopped kissing me again to tell me so. "Fuck me, fuck me harder."

The best way to do that, I decided, was to switch things up. Without letting myself slip out of her, I rolled us on the bed, so she was now beneath me. Now I could take control. I gave her a much stronger, harder thrust, and she groaned in delight. "Yes, more, more!" That's what she wanted, so that's what I did. I fucked her harder, giving her full strokes, filling her completely. I heard her get louder, and her breathing more shallow. Her short words of "oh" and "yes" goaded me onward. Finally she looked into my eyes and told me, "Come with me." It was that mid-sex voice of hers, and feeling her pussy convulse on my dick, that pushed me over the edge, and I filled my condom.

I rolled off of her, and she rolled back onto me, kissing me again. "Thank you," she said. "You're so good to me."

"You're good to me too," I said with a smile.

"No, I mean, earlier," she explained. "I was caught in the moment. If you hadn't thought about protection," she flicked my still-wrapped member, "well, let's not think about that right now."

"Okay," I nodded. "Neither of us is ready for that particular conversation."

"Right." She peeled the condom from me and threw it out. "Now, don't get sleepy yet," she told me. "You need to get home. You've got a big week ahead of you."