Only On Paper

As I picked up the diary with blue pages I thought twice about reading it... it wasn’t locked

Dear Diary I saw him again last night... I wonder if he has noticed the way I look at him yet... how my eyes move over him like hands, I wonder if he feels them. Being married I knew the thoughts I had where wrong... at least that's what I thought... but how could they be. Feelings I thought where long gone... had died long ago, you know the one's... little butterflies in your stomach... the warmth of the blush as it moves up your neck to your face. Goosebumps all over your arms... feeling the ache between my thighs is it wrong to feel it.... want it... need it?

I was always the faithful wife... never thinking I would be the one wanting another man... it had become more than a want.. it had become a need. I longed for that... the touch of his hand on my cheek... moving back and then down along my arm. Taking me in his arms and holding me tight against him, his lips kissing and licking my neck... smelling him. The look in his eyes as he takes me in... like he could never stop looking at me. His hands moving down holding my waist... pulling me to him. The way his fingers move over my skin like he's memorizing every inch.

The way he touches me making me want him... the ache between my thighs becoming the only thing I can think of... wondering if he can smell it. The way I press myself against him... how I want him so bad. Every inch on fire with lust... from the first time I saw him... I knew he was the one... the one I would finally give into. Oh yes he was the one... I had to get him to notice me but how... the guy is the one that's suppose to make the first move right?

I do have that pretty dress I just bought the blue flowered one, low neck line... sleeveless... and shorter than I normally wear... that was one thing I knew I had going for me... my long legs. I could imagine standing in front of the mirror making sure everything was just perfect for him.

Why.... what was I thinking...would he even be interested... would he think I was being to forward if I talked to him... what would I say? I went over it in my head again and again... everything sounded wrong. All I could think about was how much I wanted him... I needed it. It had been a while since I had been with a man... oh I know what your thinking your married... well it does say that on paper, yes on paper.

But what I wanted... needed... that wasn’t on any paper I knew of.

As I looked in the mirror... turning... I took one last deep breath and then made that decision that would change my life...

I decided to make a quick stop at the store I work at to let my best friend know where I was going... she smiled and said go for it, I said if he's interested I will. I felt like everyone was looking.. as if they knew what I had planned. I wondered if they knew how wet it made me just thinking about being with another guy... at the last minute I had decided to wear a light blue silk scarf around my neck. As I walked through the store, I kept feeling like I was being watched.. I chalked it up to being nervous.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and a voice say excuse me... I turned and there he was... I think my brain forgot how to make my mouth work. Doing some shopping he asked... as he held the scarf out.. I think this is yours. I smiled and nodded... as I watched him lift it to his face.. taking in a deep breath.. vanilla was my favorite sent. I reached to take it from him as my fingers touched his hand.. he pulled the scarf to his chest and smiled... you know Lynn I've noticed you looking at me. Of course I was wondering if he had been looking too.

I couldn't deny it.. I had been looking... wondering... fantasizing and even at that moment I was getting wet thinking about it. Then he asked if I would like to get a cup of coffee.. this was it... did I say yes and see where things went or did I say thanks for the offer and go back home. I knew what was there... at home... a marriage I wanted out of and a man I no longer loved.

As he stood there... my scarf tight in his hand, he smiled at me and said I know a nice little coffee shop just down the street... shall we... as I looked in his eyes I swallowed hard and said yes. I couldn't believe I was being so bold.. to be going with someone I didn't even know.. and the other things I was thinking... well ... I should have been ashamed. Once outside the store he said it's such a lovely night why don't we walk.. it's not far. A walk on the starry night with him... I had to be dreaming, hurry pinch yourself... " Ouch " It's real ...I'm here with him.

He took my arm as we walked... I had a hundred things I wanted to ask him.. but at that moment I just wanted to be there.. with him. Once we got to the coffee shop he opened the door for me... I was thinking a gentleman too. He picked a nice corner booth and asked if that was alright with me... I felt like a school girl... I didn't care it could have been anywhere as long as it was with him.

The waitress came over and asked what she could get for us... he said whatever the lady would like... I ordered a raspberry ice tea, I don't recall what he ordered but it sounded French. We sat there for a while staring at each other and then both started talking... I started to ask what he was doing at the store... and him saying I can't believe we ran into each other.

Go ahead he said.. I told him I figured he was going to think I was being silly if I told him... he chuckled and said it can't be any sillier than me just looking around hoping you where working. I guess the grin on my face gave me away... he laughed and asked you too... I nodded. Well he said great minds think alike... I was wondering at that point if he had the same thoughts I did. I reached for my glass and he reached for my hand.... taking it in his.... what do you say to a drink at my place Lynn?

Up to that point I felt secure in the fact I wasn’t totally alone with him. He slid out of the booth and pulled me up... shall we... lost in a whirl wind I found myself in his car and off to who knew where. I had to keep telling myself my girl friend knew where I was. I was so nervous my knees felt week and my hands where cold... I couldn't help but notice I was also moist. I wanted his hands on me touching... taking. Gawd yes I wanted it.. I felt like a whore...

Stop it.... he must like you or he wouldn't have been there.. and asked you out. What if that's all he wants just a one time piece of ass. What if he doesn’t like what he sees..... what if "" stop ""

The car pulled off the road down a small lane.. I watched as he got out that same cute butt I had stared at a few times in the past few weeks. He came around to my side of the car, opening the door for me and helping me out... I normally liked doing things for myself... but it sure was nice letting him do it. I had also noticed the scarf neatly tucked into his back pocket like a prize .. I couldn't help but smile. We stood on the porch and he leaned toward me kissing me in the moonlight.

That kiss.... my whole body felt like it was on fire with want... as he opened the door.. I took a deep breath... and followed close behind as we went in together. He turned to me and said I have something to tell you. I said of course anything...

" Trust me " With those words he swept me off my feet and off to his bedroom.. like a feather in the wind. He laid me gently on the silk sheets... and then he stood. I watched his hands move up and start unbuttoning his shirt.. each one allowing more flesh to show... I reached for him and he gently slapped my hand away... telling me not yet. I wanted to touch him so bad... but waited patiently. The shirt was soon off and laying across a chair beside the bed. There I was on his bed... the only place I could think about... watching him... the way his hands moved over his skin... I wanted them on me... I wanted him in me.

He toyed with me..... touching his zipper... moving his hand over the bulge in his slacks... I could tell he was nice.. and I was licking my lips mentally. He smiled and said No not yet... I think he was enjoying the sweet torture He moved close to the bed and reached down touching my cheek... rubbing softly...then ran his hand back into my hair.... his fingers tangled in it as he pulled back, leaning down he took my lips and mouth in a passionate kiss. His other hand was now pulling at my dress... when his fingers slid up and touched my wetness an evil smile crossed his lips.... No panties.... then brushing lightly across my lips with his..... leaving me wanting more.

Before I could even think he had my dress off and was kissing my breasts... licking my hard nipples.... then biting them gently. I wanted him more then anything....but he was to tease me even more... by taking his slacks off.... and leaving his silk boxers on. He sat on the edge of the bed as his hands traced over every curve... light touches... teasing making me hot and wanting. He then crawled up and put one leg in between mine and the other on the outside of it.. he moved up pressing his knee against me rubbing. I closed my eyes for a moment... as my hands moved touching his arms. Moving one hand to his chest I raised my hand so only the fingertips where touching.... as I ran my fingers through the hair on his chest. Every kiss was filled with passion and lust... taking more and more from me. His knee was rubbing hard on me... and I could feel the wetness on his leg.... he reached and took my hand from his chest and rested it on his hard cock... and it was very nice.

I wanted to feel it in me.... I rubbed my hand over him... feeling him, pulling at his boxers... and him moving back just far enough I couldn't get them off. As he moved up our eyes met again... I moaned....I want you... now.. take me. He smiled and moved closer... as my hand moved pushing his boxers off... I could feel the wet spot on them. He pushed closer.... teasing me with his manhood.. he rubbed it on my leg

I leaned my head back.... and moaned loud... as I felt him teasing and then slide slowly in, it was all I could do not to come right away he felt so good. I pushed against him and my hands moved around squeezing his ass and pulling him into my depths. Our bodies moved together as one. There I was in his bed and at that moment that's the only place I wanted to be, within minutes I was screaming with pleasure... him joining as we climaxed together. He pulled me with him as he rolled to my side... holding me close we laid in each others arms... he smiled and said how about your place next time. Next time... I couldn't wait I knew what I wanted to do... and I was hoping he would love every minute of it.

Do you think if you wish for something bad enough it will happen?