New Yor Nights-Northern Lights #03

Oh, oh...and then there was Laurel and the dreaded triangle.

Revised, rewritten, and continued from chapter 02:

Her name was Laurel. She definitely had a much better name than Barbara, my name. When I thought of her name, I thought of a field of heather. When I thought of her name, I thought of a crown, a white headpiece, and her standing at the altar next to Daniel ready to marry my man instead of me. When I thought of her name, I thought about them talking over breakfast, lunch, and dinner. With the excuse that they were working, I imagined them together night and day.

As much as I envied her name, I envied her. Unless he didn't tell her we were engaged to be married, obviously she was a bitch for being with another woman's man. How dare she? What kind of woman would do that, steal another woman's man? She was now my enemy, the dirty bitch. If ever she made a pass at my man, I'll go there and clean the floor with her. As I found out later by questioning, okay, interrogating Daniel over the phone in the way that only a jealous fiancé can, she was someone he knew from college.

'Okay. So?'

They both attended and graduated from MIT in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

'Not okay. So?'

Obviously, for her to attend and graduate from MIT, she was as much of an egghead as he was. Normally, I'm able to compete with any woman by my beautiful face, shapely body, and my slutty ways, but she had something that I didn't have. She had a big brain. Obviously, for her to have a fancy job and earning a lot of money with Exxon, she was a scientist and/or a geologist too and I was just a lowly, unpublished, amateur writer. Then, something that I was surprised he told me but, he confessed that they dated for a time.

'What? I beg your pardon? Seriously? Are you kidding me? They dated for a time? What the fuck? Fuck me! Oh, no. Are you fucking kidding me? And now she's there in Alaska working with him. Did he recruit her? Is that why he needed to stay the winter? This is just getting worse.'

Acting more like Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory, a fictional character who had two PhD's by the time he was 14-years-old, what Daniel had in intelligence, he lacked in commonsense. He was better with rocks than he was with people. Obviously, he didn't know that he should never tell his woman that he had dated the woman he was working with now. What was wrong with him to tell me that? Obviously, he didn't understand that him working with his ex-girlfriend in fucking Alaska would upset me while I was living in fucking New York.

'Duh? For someone with such a big brain, sometimes he was so stupid.'

I couldn't help but imagine all sorts of nefarious things. Was he playing me while fucking her? Maybe he was playing her while being engaged to me. I never thought of Daniel as a player. Too much of a nerd, he was too open and honest.

Maybe with him having two women in his life, something he obviously had never experienced, his head was completely turned around. My only question was; why would he propose to me when he knew he was leaving me to be with her? Maybe he hoped that proposing to me before he left would prevent him from having an affair with her. Maybe proposing to me before he left would be his excuse to resist her.

'Good luck,' I thought. 'How's that working for you...Daniel? In my mind's eye, the eye of a creative writer who imagines everything, I can see you. I can feel you just as I can imagine her.'

I imagined them having breakfast, lunch, and dinner together every day. I imagined them talking and laughing as if they were lovers instead of co-workers. I imagined them having sex in the office. I imagined them having sex out in the field and on the rocks while examining stupid rocks. I imagined them having sex in a cave or in an underwater submarine.

'Sex, sex, and more sex, I couldn't stop myself from imagining him fucking her and she sucking him,' I thought while growing angrier.

I must have had rocks in my head to let him go to Alaska alone. Yet, I can't babysit my man. I need to trust my man. He's a grown man old enough to make his own decisions and his own mistakes. I can't be there to watch him every minute of every day.

Just as some men are chick magnets with their good looks and their hot body, Daniel was a chick magnet because of his high paying job. He'd provide a good living to whichever woman he'd marry. With his and Laura's income, they'd be solid members of the top 1% of the upper echelon of rich, white Americans. While I'd still be languishing writing my never ending book, should they marry, they'd be living the good life, high on the hog.

'God help me. I hated being so jealous,' I thought while unable to help myself from being so possessive. 'Why am I doing this to myself by imagining things?'

As if they were the bachelor and bachelorette, I imagined them making out in the backseat of a helicopter. I imagined them living together in a seedy Alaskan hotel or Exxon renting them a house while they were there working, fucking, and sucking. I imagined them having sex. I couldn't help myself from not imagining them having sex.

It didn't matter where I imagined them having sex, it was bad enough that I imagined them having sex. Even though I had his engagement ring on my finger and even though I was now officially his fiancé, to say that I was jealous would be a huge understatement. I was murderously livid. For me to be hung up thinking about this, I must have been picking up on something coming through the Skype screen.

And now here they are, ex-boyfriend and ex-girlfriend, alumni from the same college, working together out in the field, and with me a sixth of the width of the planet away. I just knew it was only a matter of time before they came together as lovers instead of co-workers. I just knew it was only a matter of time before they rekindled their lover affair. I truly believe that it was only a matter of time before I'd be left out in the cold.

They had something that I didn't have. They had a history and memories of being together when they were younger. Even though we had a history and memories too, obviously, he was ready to throw all of that away. Obviously for him to cheat on me with her, if that's what he was doing, they had something special.

'What the fuck?'

And now here they are ex-lovers together again and God knows doing what besides working while examining rocks and looking for oil. If you ask me, Daniel already struck gold when he met me. Now here he is fishing down the bottom of the barrel with this ugly, flat chested, egg head of a bitch. How dare he?

'Give me a break. If I was there instead of here, he'd never look twice at her,' I thought. 'If I was on my knees with his cock in my mouth, he'd be telling me how much he loved me and wanted to marry me. Only, instead of being there in Alaska, I was here in New York. What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck?'

With me no longer his fuckbuddy or his girlfriend, we were engaged and I was now elevated to his fiancé. Yet, I was as jealous as I was possessive that Laurel was with my man all day, every day, and possibly all night, every night. I imagined them sleeping together, cuddling together, and spooning one another. I imagined her hold his cock while spooning him and him holding her little breast while spooning her.

I wasn't going to put up with this shit without a fight for the man that I love. It was then that I decided to do something about their working relationship before it blossomed into a love relationship, unless it had already. On the pretense of surprising him because I missed him, it was then that I decided to make the trip to Alaska. It was then I decided to have my Alaskan adventure so that I could finally finish my book.

Chapter 03:

I booked a flight from New York to Anchorage, where Daniel's Exxon office was. The flight had a stop in Denver. I rented a car at the Ted Stevens, Anchorage International Airport, Car Rental and drove to his office downtown. It wasn't far, about six miles. As if meant to see their indiscretions, before even getting out the car, I saw her. As if she owned his ass, Laurel walked from her desk to sit beside him. The two of them looked all cozy.

On the way there, my anger subsided. I was crazy with jealousy and possessiveness before but no longer feeling that way now until I saw her sitting next to him and so very close to him. Yet, just because he was working with a woman, a woman who attended the same college he did and a woman who was his ex-girlfriend, doesn't mean that they're lovers now. Professional scientists or geologists, whatever they fuck they are, they're just co-workers.

I needed to get a hold of myself before I made a fool of myself. I needed to stop imagining the worst about people. I needed to be more positive instead of being so negative. I wasn't going there to get in a fight with my fiancé and/or his lover. I was going there because I missed him and wanted to be with him. I was going there to have a belated Christmas and to give him the Christmas gifts I had bought for him but was unable to give him because he was working in frigging Alaska.

'Alaska, Alaska, suddenly after always longing to see Alaska, I hated Alaska,' I thought while getting angry all over again.

I grabbed my camera from my purse, the one with a zoom lens. I wanted to get a closer look at this four-eyed bitch. Something she wasn't wearing in the Skype video, she was now wearing makeup and (gulp) lipstick. What the fuck?

Moreover, instead of wearing a frigging lab coat with her cutesy name tag on it, Laurel, she was wearing a short skirt and a low cut blouse. Give me a break. Dressing her in a low cut blouse and a short skirt was like dressing a dog in clothes. Putting lipstick on a pig doesn't make her any less of a pig. Trust me, with me a whore, I know a whore when I see a whore.

'Fuck me,' I thought. I was enraged all over again.

If I caught them sitting together now, they must sit together all the time. Even when we were alone in the apartment, something he never did with me, he never sat beside me. Even though I wanted him to, we never sat on the couch together and cuddled. He sat in his chair on one side of the room and I sat on the couch on the other side of the room. Even though I always wanted to cuddle with him while watching TV, he was always too busy doing something on his computer.

We were from two different worlds and it was hard for me to bridge such a huge gap that was created by his abnormally high intelligence. Obviously, Laurel had no trouble connecting with him in the way that I never could. Obviously, she was more like him than I could ever be. Opposites attract while watching a Billy Joel concert in Central Park but in real life, the money is on the couple that have more things in common.

Who is to know? Maybe he was busy writing her. Yet, if he was interested in her before, why would he propose to me now? Maybe with him gone for two months and now the whole winter, he thought if he didn't do something, he'd lose me. Maybe seeing her again after he proposed to me, she turned his head around.

Instead of me being his fiancée, as if they were boyfriend and girlfriend or husband and wife, I envied their intimacy. They were talking or working but it looked like more than that to me. They looked as if they were enjoying one another's company in the way he never did with me. Her hand was on his hand and she was gazing in his eyes as if they were lovers instead of co-workers. Then, as if I imagined it and was seeing things, they kissed. I couldn't believe my eyes.

'Fuck me,' I thought while wishing I had a gun.

As if they were kissing expressly for my benefit, what are the odds that I'd show up at the exact place and the exact time just as they were kissing? Much like seeing a rat or a roach out in the open, it means that the place is infested. Infested with kisses instead of pests, I figured the same about them kissing. For me to unfortunately catch them kissing, they must kiss all the frigging time.

'Kissing and kissing, k-i-s-s-i-n-g, Daniel and Laurel kissing in Alaska,' I thought with rage.

Hoping that it would be just a friendly peck, it wasn't. It was a long, wet kiss with tongues. Waiting for their kiss to finish before getting out of the car to confront them, the kiss lasted for more than a minute. With tears running down my cheeks, the minute seemed like an hour. In all the times he kissed me, even when his prick was inside of me, he never kissed me like that and in the way he was kissing her now.

I saw my future with him crumble. There goes my big wedding. I'd never marry him now. I'd never have the children I imagined having with him. I couldn't even bare to look at him. I felt so deceived.

I wanted to throw my engagement ring out the window but I didn't. It was too beautiful and too expensive to discard. Not wanting to embarrass myself, needing to save my pride, instead of getting out of the car, I drove away. I was too upset to confront them. I was so angry that I may have hurt one of them or both of them. Now, better this way, he'd never know I was there witnessing them kissing.

### TallBlondeBustyBlueEyedBimbo ###

With Anchorage seemingly so busy, busier than I had imagined it would be, I needed to go someplace quiet. I needed to be alone. I needed to think. I needed to think of what to do next. I just needed to drive away from there and from them.

Here I was in Alaska with no place to go and no place to stay, I wished I was dead. Driving and driving, I didn't even know where in the Hell I was or where in the Hell I was going. Having just gotten there, I was sorry that I traveled all of that way. With ignorance bliss, I wished I had stayed in New York. I wished I had never seen them kissing.

It started to get dark and the roads were already slippery. Obviously, this car wasn't equipped with snow tires. What kind of car rental agency doesn't equip all of their cars in frigging Alaska with snow tires? All season tires are useless in the snow. When I had my Mustang GT that was equipped with traction control and wearing four snow tires, I never got stuck.

Not paying attention to my speed, I was driving too fast for the slick road conditions but I was angry. As if putting distance between them, calming myself down, I couldn't get away from there fast enough. Then, I started crying again. I cried so much that I was unable to see through my tears.

A big, logging truck flew by me and splashed snow and ice all over my windshield. Even with my windshield wipers going at full speed, I still couldn't see. I didn't know I had driven off the road until I heard a big thud and felt a hard jolt. With the car nearly leaning sideways, I was stuck. I was fucked. No longer wishing I was dead, I was just glad that I was still alive.

'What am I going to do now?'

### TallBlondeBustyBlueEyedBimbo ###

It was cold, it was snowing, and I was still crying, even more so now that I was off the road and stuck in a ditch. I pulled my cellphone out of my purse and my phone had no bars. Even if my phone did have bars, who would I call? Even if my phone did have bars, the battery was too low to even make a call.

With me so unprepared, what was I thinking? I was in the middle of nowhere. With it getting dark, snowing, and really getting cold, and with me not having any food or water, what do I do now? Buried by a mountain of snow and trapped in my rental car, I imagined dying there by the side of the road outside of Anchorage, Alaska. I imagined, come the spring, someone finding my dead, frozen, and decomposed body.

Not having anything else to do, I kept looking at my watch. The car wouldn't start so I didn't even have heat. I was so cold. I was so tired. I was angry. God, I was so upset. I was there three hours before I saw the headlights of a truck in the distance.

With no food, no water, no blanket, and no phone, how stupid could I have been to be so unprepared for the cold weather when in Alaska? At the very least, I wish I had my hat, my gloves, my boots, and my scarf, but they were all in my suitcase in the trunk of the car. If I tried to get them, with everything so slippery, I'd probably fall down the incline and wouldn't be able to climb back up to the car.

'Duh? God I'm so frigging stupid.'

I struggled to climb out of the rental car. With the car pitched at a 45-degree angle, the door was now so heavy and more difficult to open. Finally climbing out and nearly crushed by the slamming car door, I waved to him. Waving and waving at him while jumping up and down screaming, I desperately tried to flag him down.

"Yoo-hoo! Hey! Over here! Help! Help me! Please, God, stop! Stop!"

Not wanting him to hit me, I stayed off the road. The visibility was so terrible that I was surprised he even saw me but, as he drove past, his headlines lit me up as if I was a ghost. If my car hadn't been off the road, he may have hit my car. I was so relieved when I saw his brake lights. He stopped his truck and got out.

Even in the dark, he looked like my idea of an Alaskan trucker. He stood about 6'4" tall, had long hair and had a scraggly beard. Only, he looked so old. He looked to be about 60-years-old. Was he my Alaskan, mystery man that I had imagined as the hero character in my book? I wished he was twenty-years younger.

Overcome with emotion, no longer thinking that I was going to die, I just wanted to hug him for saving me, at least I hoped he'd save me and not leave me there to fend for myself. For all that I knew with there no one else around, he could rob me, rape me, and murder me. I quickly turned my engagement ring around. Only, instead of being happy to see him, I was suddenly afraid of him. What if he was a serial killer who stopped to help desperate, stupid women stuck on the side of the road before raping them and murdering them?

"Are you hurt?"

He left his truck idling and walked towards me in the cold and in the snow as if he was used to the nasty weather. I was shivering from the cold and he looked as if he was out for a stroll. In the way he looked wearing his jacket, he reminded me of a grizzly bear. Where Daniel took a size 40 jacket, I imagined this man took an XXL jacket.

He had a nice voice, a manly and soft voice at the same time. He sounded like and reminded me of what Tom Sellick would look like if he lived in Alaska and was 60-years-old instead of 71-years-old. He relieved my sense of fear as soon as he spoke and as soon as he showed his concern for my wellbeing. Even though it was dark, I could see he had kind eyes, eyes that I seldom see in cold and busy downtown Manhattan. I suddenly felt at ease. More than that, I felt comfortable in his company. I relaxed.

Totally different from my fiancé or ex-fiancé, it had been a long time since I had been in the company of a real man, a manly man, and a macho man. Oh, he was more than a macho man, he was a real man. He was a kind man with a big heart. As if he was an open book, I could read him with just a look.

"No," I said. "I drove my car off the road. I don't know where I am," I said.

I thought I was going to start crying again. Suddenly, I wished he was the father that I never had. I never had a man to protect me. My fiancée wasn't much of a man's man and was no protection at all. He was more the egg headed scientist than he was a sportsman.

Always with his head up his ass, he was more a victim than a savior. He'd rather strategize and map out a fight with algebraic equations on a big blackboard than to actually get in a fight. Forget about him in a barroom brawl, he didn't even like beer. He didn't even drink. Now, there he was cheating on me with his ex-girlfriend. How typical was that?

'God, Daniel was such an asshole,' I thought. 'And Laurel is such a despicable cunt. Yet, deserving of one another, maybe they did me a favor. I'd much rather know now that I had no future with him than to find out when I was married with kids and on my way to being a divorce, single mom.'