Mary and Alvin

The Newlywed Waltz

There were sixteen different types of tea in the cupboard. Alvin counted them. Who needed sixteen types of tea? White truffle? Blueberry chamomile? All he ever saw her drink was Sleepy Time.

"Honey, come here, sit down," Mary said from the kitchen table, "I want to talk to you about something."

"Why do you have so many kinds of tea?" he asked.

"Why do you have six kinds of mustard?"

"That's different."

"Uh huh. So, I want you to look at this." He sat down and she handed him a yellow flyer. "You know I have been thinking of ways that I could meet more people, get more involved in things around town. I thought this would be fun."

"Dance lessons?" Alvin asked, glancing at the paper.

"Ballroom dancing. It's at the American Legion Hall every Wednesday. I thought it would be fun for us to go."

"Both of us?"

"You think I'm going to go ballroom dancing by myself?"

"No, I guess not."

Mary shrugged. "We don't have to if you don't want to."

"No, sweetheart, I'm willing to give it a go."

"You're sure? I don't want to do it if you won't enjoy it."

He handed her back the flyer. "Sign us up."

"Alright, baby," Mary said, "Are you ready to go?" She drank the last of her tea and stood up. Alvin rose while she retrieved her purse from the living room.

They walked out to the garage and kissed each other goodbye. Alvin opened the door of Mary's car and she slipped into the driver's seat. He leaned in and kissed her again.

"Glutton," she said, kissing him back. "I'll see you after work."

She backed out of the garage, sending a pair of Jennifer's new chickens scurrying out of the dooryard. Alvin stepped out and watched until she had turned and disappeared down the road before he climbed into his pick up truck. He started to back up, when he saw Jennifer running across the field, waving her arms at him.

He stopped and waited for her to reach him.

"I'm glad I caught you," she said, leaning on the car door and catching her breath.

"What's up?"

"I wanted to borrow your truck. I want to go up to Winterport to get my beehives today."

Alvin turned off the engine and got out of the car. "Sure, I can take the Subaru."

"Thanks, Dad," she said, standing on her toes to kiss his cheek.

"You figured out where you want to put them?"

"Yeah, down the other side of the pond, along the stone wall."

"Need any help with them?"

"Nope, I got it."

"Well, alright then."

He went into the garage and got in his car. As he pulled out and headed to the wharf, he marveled at how much his daughter had accomplished in just a few weeks in bringing the old farm back to life.

On the Saturday before their wedding, Alvin and Mary and Charlotte had driven to Orono and found seats in the bleachers of the cavernous gymnasium on the University of Maine campus. Before them, a sea of blue stretched across the floor, more than a thousand happy graduates in their caps and gowns, awaiting the moment when they would be handed their diplomas.

"I remember my commencement," Mary said, "Since Wyatt's last name starts with an A and mine with a W, it was about two hours from when he got his diploma till I got mine. By the time I found him, he and his friends were totally stoned."

Charlotte laughed. "I remember..." she began, then looked at her father. "I'll tell you about it later, Mary."

Alvin felt a moment of regret that he had not gone to college. He'd had no interest in it when he was young, but he had always held his daughters to high academic expectations, and they had not disappointed him. When the assembled graduates began receiving their diplomas, he was almost bouncing in his seat with expectation.

Mary wrapped her arm around his. He looked at her with a smile that warmed her heart.

"Such a proud papa," she said, leaning her head on his shoulder.

When roll call reached the F's, Alvin slid to the edge of his seat. The announcer read off the name, "Jennifer Faulkner" and he bounded out of his seat like he had seen the winning goal in a championship game. Mary and Charlotte stood up on either side of him and clapped and cheered as Jennifer mounted the stage, her copious blonde hair flowing from under her cap. She took her diploma and strutted off the stage, pumping her fist.

Alvin turned and hugged Charlotte, and then Mary. She reached up and wiped a single tear from his cheek. They sat down and he leaned his head toward her.

"Mary," he whispered, "Is it okay that I really miss Bonnie right now?"

"Of course it is, sweetheart," she said, and kissed him.

They waited anxiously for the next name they were there to hear. Finally, the announcer worked his way through the O's.

"Danielle Ortega."

Once more, they all stood and cheered. Danni raised her diploma high over her head and walked across the stage, straight backed and dignified.

Alvin was wiping his eyes when Mary nudged him.

"Look, honey."

Alvin looked down at the floor and saw a blur of blue and blonde streaking down the aisle. Jennifer flung herself into Danni's arms and the two of them hugged, spinning in the aisle as a ripple of applause echoed through the gym. They kissed, then walked, hand in hand, down the aisle and back to their seats.

Charlotte stroked Alvin's back. "You did a good job, Daddy."

When the ceremony ended, they filed out of the gym and wound their way through the crowd outside until they found Jennifer and Danni. After a round of hugs and kisses, and not a few tears, they all piled into Alvin's car and drove into Bangor for dinner.

Alvin thought back to the graduation ceremony as he drove to work, and he kept picturing the faces around the dinner table that night; the soon to be wife he adored so deeply, and his two, no three, wonderful daughters. The talk that night was all of the future, of the upcoming wedding and honeymoon, of Charlotte's acceptance to law school, of Jennifer's plans for the farm and Danni's job hunting. Now, barely a month later, the signs of change were all around him.

It felt to Alvin like his whole life was being turned topsy-turvy. He was happy with everything that was going on, but taken all at once, it was unsettling.

The landscape he had known since childhood was radically altered. The pastures around the house, long covered with tall grass and wildflowers, had been mown to the ground. Along the tree line, the tangle of puckerbrush had been cleared. And there seemed to be chickens everywhere.

But the changes outside were as nothing compared to the change within the house. He had not considered the emotional impact of seeing the bedroom closet, so long near empty, filled again with a woman's clothes, or the bathroom counter cluttered with cosmetics and toiletries. He felt a certain melancholy. He was very happy to have Mary establish herself as a permanent part of his environment, and he did not really feel regret to see the last traces of Bonnie's presence subsumed by Mary's. In fact, he felt a twinge of guilt that he did not feel worse about that.

He arrived at the wharf to find there were already customers waiting. It was a beautiful early summer morning, and folks were anxious to get out on the water. Laura had arrived before Alvin and had her hands full with a couple who had brought their yacht up from Mass and were bombarding her with requests for services. Alvin jumped into action, helping a young couple cast off in their new sailboat, renting kayaks to a couple of teenagers and showing a fisherman how to operate the gas pump.

By lunchtime, things had quieted down. Alvin walked up to the carry out and brought back two cheeseburger baskets and two cans of soda.

"So, how's married life?" Laura asked him as they ate.

Alvin shrugged. "It's all going good. You know, there's always adjustments."

Laura narrowed her eyes. "See, I thought I was going to hear, oh wow, it's finest kind. Couldn't be happier. So what's up?"

"It's great," Alvin insisted, "But you know, I've been used to living one way, and now, well, there's a lot going on, what with Jen and her projects in addition to Mary moving in."

"Seems like it ought to be an exciting time."

Alvin sat for a minute, chewing his burger and thinking. "I'm not unhappy, not at all, but I feel sort of discombobulated. It feels like everything else is changing." He paused for a second, then added, "But I stay the same."

Laura chuckled. "You know, cuz, most of the time a man has a midlife crisis and goes out and finds himself a younger woman. Looks like you done it backwards."

Alvin shook his head. "I don't think I'm having a midlife crisis."

"Well, like it or not, you're in your midlife, and like you said, your life is changing all around you. What I don't get is you saying you haven't changed."

"I don't think I have."

Laura finished her burger. "All I know is that a few years ago, you'd have run and hid when things got serious with Mary."

Alvin started to speak, but she waved him off and continued. "You can say, oh, but Mary is special, and that's fine. She is. She's fantastic. But it wouldn't have mattered if you weren't ready for her."

"I guess that's so," Alvin said. "She asked me this morning if I'd go to dancing classes with her. Kind of surprised myself by saying yes."

A car pulled up outside the office and Laura rose from her seat. "Alvin, if she had asked you to stick your dick in a light socket, you'd have said yes."

She stepped outside to greet the customer. Alvin leaned back in his chair. Yeah, I probably would have, he thought.

***

Londonderry's first Thai restaurant had opened on Memorial Day weekend, and had become the preferred lunch spot for the employees at the bank. Mary and Kelly had been there a half dozen times, and were still not tired of it.

"So did you ask Alvin about the ballroom dancing?" Kelly asked, twirling her drunken noodle on her chopsticks.

"You've got that down pretty good," Mary replied with a smile. "I asked him. He didn't seem too excited, but he said yes."

"Once he goes, he will have fun."

"What did Mike say when you asked him?"

Kelly scowled. "Oh honey, I didn't ask him, I told him."

Mary laughed. "I take a more subtle approach with Alvin."

"So how are things going?" Kelly asked, "Making yourself at home?"

"Oh yeah, it's fine."

"No ghosts?"

"No," Mary said, "No ghosts."

"You know, I remember when Mike and I got married, it wasn't easy adjusting to living together. That's normal. And honey, they are men. They are going to leave their underwear on the floor. They're going to leave toothpaste in the sink. When they wrap leftovers in plastic wrap, it will come off in the refrigerator. That's just frickin' life."

Mary laughed. "No, Alvin's pretty good with the plastic wrap."

"But you wipe toothpaste out of the sink every morning don't you?"

"Yes, pretty much," Mary nodded with a grin, "He is good about putting the toilet seat down, though."

"Well, that's a plus. Still, you had that nice little apartment that was just yours. Maybe you could turn one of the spare bedrooms into your own space, just to have a getaway."

Mary thought about that as she finished her pad thai. As happy as she was, there was a part of her that missed her apartment. When they returned from their honeymoon in Boston, she and Alvin had moved the last of her belongings from it. Alvin's brother in law Bob Michaud, and his teenage daughter Rachel came and helped load Mary's bed into the back of Alvin's pickup. Rachel needed a new bed and Mary was happy to see the one she no longer needed go to a good use. As Alvin and Bob wrestled the mattress down the stairs, she found herself sniffling back a tear.

"What's wrong, Aunt Mary?" Rachel asked.

"Oh nothing," Mary replied. She was not going to tell the young girl that she was thinking that the first time she and Alvin had made love, it was in that bed. "Come here, I've got something for you."

Rachel had avidly taken advantage of Mary's offer of access to her library. Over the winter, she had stopped at the apartment and chosen a new book to read almost every week.

Rachel followed Mary into the kitchen. The room was bare except for one cardboard box on the counter next to the stove.

Mary opened the flaps and Rachel looked inside. She picked up a copy of The Golden Compass and flipped it open.

"I want you to take these, they are yours now."

Rachel's eyes widened. "Thank you, Aunt Mary."

Mary stroked the girl's hair. "Of course, you are welcome to come to the farm anytime you want. But I know that's a little further for you to go, and I can't let you run out of books to read."

Rachel hugged Mary around the waist. Alvin and Bob trudged up the stairs.

"Hey, honey, she's only moving two miles away," Bob chuckled.

"I think that's everything," Mary said. "Bob, can you take this box? It's for Rachel."

"Sure," Bob said, picking up the box of books. Mary squeezed Rachel, then let her go. She followed her father downstairs.

Mary leaned on the counter and looked at Alvin.

"You alright?" she asked, "How's your back?"

"A little stiff. Be nice if I could find someone to give me a back rub tonight before bed."

"I'll rub anything you want rubbed, my love," Mary said. "There is one more thing we have to do, though. I've been putting it off."

"What's that?"

"Come with me." Mary went into the bathroom, and Alvin followed. She stood in front of the mirror with her arms crossed.

"I have to clean the mirror," she said.

Alvin looked at Mary's reflection. It was framed by the big red lipstick heart he had drawn on Valentine's Day. In the center, it read "Alvin + Mary".

"Jeezum crow," he said, "You never washed it off?"

She shook her head. "It seemed like throwing away a love letter."

Alvin put his hands on Mary's hips and kissed the side of her neck. She leaned back again him, raising her arms over her shoulders and holding his head. His right hand left her hip and slid across the front of her jeans and between her legs. She gasped when he squeezed her there and pressed her ass back against him. She could feel his hard cock against her. He raised his hand, unsnapped the waist of her jeans, and slipped it inside. She watched in the mirror and it moved between her legs.

"Oh god," she moaned as his fingers reached her wet slit. She made eye contact with his reflection in the mirror and held it as she wriggled in response to his touch. She squeezed his hand tightly between her thighs and watched as his other hand slipped under her shirt and caressed her breast.

"Oh, Alvin."

"Tell me what you want, baby," he whispered in her ear.

"I want you to fuck me."

He put both of his hands in her jeans and pushed them down to her knees. Without breaking eye contact, he pressed on her back, bending her down across the sink. Mary leaned on her elbows and watched his face as he entered her. She closed her eyes as he began a slow back and forth motion.

"Look at yourself," Alvin said, "look at how beautiful you are."

She opened her eyes and looked at her reflection. Her face was flushed, her mouth was half opened. She tried to put herself in Alvin's place, to see herself as he saw her. All her life, she had been told how pretty she was, and she understood that it was true, but emotionally, in the depths of her soul, there had always been a small voice raising doubts. But she looked at herself now, and then raised her eyes to meet Alvin's in the mirrors, and she was overcome with a feeling of sexual confidence. It was exhilarating. She pushed back hard, meeting Alvin's thrusts. He gripped her shoulder and pumped harder. She sagged on to the counter as she climaxed, pressing her hands against the mirror, and smearing lipstick on her palms. Alvin came a few seconds later, releasing into her with a slow grinding motion.

Mary straightened her arms and rose up from the sink. Alvin gently kneaded her shoulders. She picked up the glass cleaner and sprayed it on the mirror.

"I don't need to be reminded that you love me," she said, still a little short of breath, "I have never doubted it."

She wiped the glass with the cleaning rag until the lipstick was gone. Alvin wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her behind her ear. "Let's go home," he whispered.

Mary wasted no time in making the old farmhouse her home, but she tried to be mindful that this had been the Faulkner family home for generations, and she needed to respect that. She has less than a year's worth of memories in the house, but for Alvin, every room, every piece of furniture, must hold recollections of his parents and his grandparents, of his daughters as they grew up, and of the life he shared with Bonnie.

Alvin cleared enough space in the living room bookcases for some of Mary's books. They would have to find more room somewhere, but at least she could get some her favorites shelved. As she was going though them, she found that, in addition to books, one of the books contained a few framed photographs. There was one of her parent's wedding pictures, a glossy group shot of the whole family, taken not long before her father's death, and one of herself, not more than eleven or twelve, wearing a blue leotard and standing in plie position. She carried the pictures over to the mantel of the fireplace. It was already crowded with Alvin's family pictures, but she was sure she could make room to add hers. She began shifting the pictures around, when her hand alighted on the portrait of Bonnie. She picked it up and looked at it closely. She thought of Charlotte's words at the cemetery. "Why can't Daddy have two angels?" There was a thin coat of dust on the glass. She wiped it off with her sleeve, and stood the picture back on the mantel. She carefully added her own pictures, interspersing them with those of Alvin's family. She left a space open. There was still one more wedding picture to add.

***

Even on a warm summer evening, it was cool inside the cavernous meeting room of the American Legion Hall. The tables and folding chairs were stacked against the walls, and the bingo equipment had been pushed to the back of the small stage. Alvin and Mary entered and crossed the wide hard wood floor to where a small group had gathered around a table waiting for the class to begin. Kelly Martin greeted Mary with a hug, then introduced Alvin to her husband, Mike. There were cookies and jugs of cider on the table. Alvin poured a cup of cider for Mary and one for himself. There were three other couples waiting for the class to start, and everyone exchanged names. Alvin was surprised that he didn't know any of them. It seemed like it was not that long ago when he knew everyone in town.

A small, dark haired woman in a long flowing peasant dress entered the room and clapped her hands.

"Good evening, everyone," she called in an accent that made Mary think of Katherine Hepburn. "I am Miss Suzanne, I will be your instructor." She looked them over, quietly doing a head count. "I believe we are short one couple..."

As she was saying it, the door swung open and the last couple entered the hall. "Ah, here they are," Miss Suzanne said with a smile.

"Jeezum crow," Alvin muttered. Mary watched a buxom brunette strut towards them, followed by a tall gangly man who looked like he was being led to a firing squad.

"Oh my Christ, Alvin Faulkner!" the woman exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. Alvin patted her gingerly on the back while shrugging toward Mary, who was looking on with puzzled amusement.

"Hey, Terri," he said, moving her to arms length, "I'd like for you to meet my wife."

"Well, damn," Terri said, looking Mary up and down, "You hit the jackpot there, Alvin."

"I guess so," Alvin said, "This is Mary. Mary, Terri," he said, feeling silly at the rhyme.

Mary held out her hand, but Terri ignored it, wrapping her in a bearhug instead. "Good to meet you," she said, "I hope you are making him happy."