Love & Death

Rachel made her way through the throngs of people gathering on campus for yet another protest. It was spring again. Protest season was in full swing. What was it this time? She wondered grumpily. World Peace? End the Drug War? Or was it homosexuality rights? The last one was the only one she thought logical. She rolled her eyes at the crowd. The same thousand or so people every weekend. The same three bitches, sometime they even tried to do all three at once. That was always interesting to say the least.

"World Peace," Rachel murmured to herself. Like that would ever happen. Humans by their very nature were violent animals. As long as there was organized, fanatical religion, there were going to be wars. Eliminate religion and humans would find something else to duke it out over.

Rachel was a very attractive woman. She had shoulder length red hair. Her eyes were vivid green. Freckles spread across her nose and cheekbones. She was about 5ft6 and 125 pounds. She had a medium sized bust, which she often hid under loose t-shirts or bulky sweaters. Her blue jeans hugged her large shapely hips and got a lot of attention from the men on campus.

Rachel ran her long slender fingers through her red hair. It was a nervous habit. Rachel was an incredibly shy person. This many people so close together always made her jittery. Why did they have to gather in such large numbers?

She had always been really reclusive. She never even went on dates in high school. Her mom always told her she needed to get out more, but that was impossible for Rachel. She didn't want to be so shy, but she couldn't help it. The fear she had of so many other people at once was almost crippling.

Finally, Rachel thought, I've reached the edge of this mob. She made her way to her dorm. Hopefully Sheryl wouldn't be home. Sheryl was a very wild woman. She was always partying, having friends crowding the dorm room, and her many lovers. Sheryl was bi and very sexual. She slept with just about anyone. She had even put the moves on Rachel once, that was an experience.

Rachel walked down the hall towards her shared room. The voices coming from the open door made Rachel frown. Damn! Sheryl's home. Is there no where on the damned campus to find peace and quiet? Rachel shrugged and sighed as she finished the journey to her dorm room.

Sheryl was really pretty. She had long blonde curls. Pale blue eye. A babyish round face and a wonderful Barbie doll figure. She was tall, and had very long shapely legs. She was incredibly sensual in every way. The night that she'd made advances on Rachel, Rachel found it hard to resist her. If she did it again, Rachel would probably give in.

"Hi Rachel," Sheryl greeted cheerfully.

Sheryl's blue eyes sparkled. She was always friendly. Rachel couldn't fault her for her openness. Rachel just smiled to return the greeting. She climbed in to her loft bunk and tried to ignore Sheryl and the unknown man below her.

Sheryl always had company on Saturdays. Rachel should've known the dorm wouldn't be empty. She just wanted to get a nap before going to the lab. Studying all night was catching up to her.

"Hey Rachel," Sheryl yelled from the lower bunk. "Do you have to work tonight?"

"Yes," Rachel mumbled.

"Bummer."

Rachel looked over the edge of her bed at Sheryl. "Why?"

"There was this really cool party tonight. I was hoping you would want to go."

"That's okay. I'm not too big on parties anyway."

"I know. Too many people. But this one's different. Casey here said there would only be ten or fifteen people there. He said it would be ok if you went too."

Rachel smiled warmly at both of them. "I really appreciate the offer, but I have a lot of work to do this evening."

"You always have a lot to do at the lab," Sheryl chided.

"It's a busy lab." Rachel was majoring in genetics. She wanted to study genetic diseases and help find cures. It was kind of ironic; Rachel practically agoraphobic. Her biggest fear was other people. She didn't like strangers. Huge crowds like the one she had just waded through were terrifying.

The human genome was mapped out. This was a big thing in biology. Rachel felt her place was in genetic research. This was her belief since her father died twelve years earlier. She wanted to find a cure for Huntington's disease. It was her life goal. The thought that it might happen to her, scared Rachel to death. Her time may be limited. This was the reason she spent so much time in the lab.

"Call in just this one time," Sheryl suggested. "You need to have some fun. If you spend your whole college career in the lab, how do expect to accomplish the other goal of high education?"

"Other goal?" Rachel knew what her roommate meant. She heard the same speech from Mom every weekend. Now she was getting it from Sheryl. "You've been talking to my mom again," Rachel accused.

"Sorry," Sheryl said softly. "She just wants you to have some fun for once in your life. I agree. You should live life to its fullest in college.

Rachel's green eyes wandered to Casey's face. He was just sitting quietly on the desk chair smiling. He was handsome. He had sandy blonde hair to his shoulders. His blue eyes were surprisingly vivid. He had a slender face with high cheekbones. His nose was long and graceful. It fit the face well. He kind of resembled a very young version of David Bowie. Rachel had always had a crush on David Bowie. She blushed.

Casey met Rachel's observing stare. She averted her eyes and lowered her head. Casey thought Rachel had a sweet innocence about her. He'd had a few classes with her in the past. He was a pre-med student. Thought she was kind of stuck up. She never talked to anyone, except the professors after class. He even thought once that she was doing favors for grades. He shook his head

This was why she never talked to her peers. She wasn't stuck up or turning trick for grades. She was just shy. The realization made Casey feel very attracted to her. He watched and listened as Rachel and Sheryl had their dispute.

Rachel could stop looking at Casey. He was somehow familiar. She couldn't put her finger on it. She shrugged and lay back in her pillow.

"I can't go tonight!" Rachel said annoyed at her roommate's persistence.

Sheryl started to answer, but Casey stopped her. "Maybe some other time then?" he offered politely.

Rachel looked at him once more. She smiled. "Sure, some other time."

"Wow!" Sheryl said triumphantly. "She gave you rain check. That's more than I've ever got, you stud."

"Thanks," Casey responded cheerfully.

"Let's get out of here and let here sleep. She was at the library all night again." Sheryl took on the nagging concerned voice of Rachel's mother.

"Good bye Sheryl," Rachel whined. She only wanted some sleep. "I was nice meeting you Casey," Rachel said politely and extended her hand from the loft bed.

Casey took her hand and kissed the back. "I enjoyed meeting you too."

The kiss made Rachel blush. The heat of his breath tickled her skin. His lips were soft and velvety. He even had a slight British accent. She reconsidered the offer. "When is this party?" He really did look like Rachel's biggest crush.

Sheryl smiled. Her face lit up like a Christmas tree. "Are you actually thinking about going?"

"Yes, maybe I could use a night off. I've been working in that lab everyday for a year."

"I know. Looks like you won her over Casey. Good job."

"So when and where do I go?"

Casey gave Rachel a map and invitation. She read over it and smiled. "I can find this easy. I'll be there."

"Promise?" Sheryl teased.

"I promise. But I need a nap first."

"Okay. We're leaving, for real." Casey and Sheryl left the dorm room. Rachel sighed and laid her head on her pillow.

Rachel lay awake on her bed. She kept thinking of Casey. He invited her to a party, with a formal invitation. He was really cute. And Rachel had been working pretty hard lately. Doctor Gordon wouldn't mind if she took just one night off. He was understanding like that.

Rachel found the cordless right by her pillow. Had Sheryl left it there? Was she so sure Rachel would cave? They had become pretty good friends this year. They were even talking about getting a house together off campus for next year.

The beeps of the number on the receiver rang in Rachel's head as she dialed the professor's number. The phone on the other end rang several times. It seemed like forever. Why wasn't his voice mail on?

Rachel was about to hang up when the other line got answered.

"Hello?"

"Hello, Dr. Gordon. This is Rachel."

"Good afternoon Rachel. How are you?"

"I'm okay, thank you. I was calling because I'm not going to be in tonight."

"You're not?" Dr. Gordon sounded shocked. "Are you sure you're okay? You're not sick or hurt?"

"No I just think I need a night off. All the excitement of the genome project is getting to me. I want to relax."

"I think that's a good idea Rachel. You do work too much. Even I take time off."

Rachel giggled, Dr. Gordon was a workaholic. He was almost always in a lab or teaching a class or doing something work related. But he always took Sunday off. She knew he would understand.

"Do you have anything planned?" Gordon asked.

"It was kind of spur of the moment, but yes. I'm going to a party."

"Wow! You must be stressed," Gordon teased. He was a nice guy. Always looking to make a joke. "Take tomorrow off too. You know I won't be there."

"Okay. Thank you Dr. Gordon."

"Don't be so formal," Gordon teased for the millionth time. "How many times have I told you to call me Michael?"

"Sorry. Michael. See you on Monday."

"Have a good time and don't worry."

"Thank you Michael. Bye."

"Good bye dear." Rachel turned off the phone.

She laid back and closed her eyes. What was it about Casey? His eyes were still boring through her. The kiss on her hand still warmed her entire body.

"Oooh," Rachel whined, "I can't sleep. I'm so damned tired; why can't I sleep?" It was a rhetorical question to her self. Her hand moved to her crotch. She felt that all too familiar lonely pleasure.

Rachel had had sex once. On her prom night. She went out with Steven Brown. He was cute, kind of nerdy, but cute. It was a nice date. Steven sure knew how to treat a lady. He was the sweetest boy in the whole school. He was also quite popular with the other girls.

Rachel and Steven worked together on many homework assignments. He was her only friend growing up. She really did like him. When he asked her to prom Rachel almost fainted. And he was a great lover. But he was gone now.

Rachel felt a tear in her eye. Steven was killed in a car accident the day after prom. Rachel missed him terribly. She missed his jokes. His laughter. His warm arms around her. She missed his kisses and probing hands. And the orgasms he gave her.

Rachel often thought about Steven when she masturbated. It was his hand stroking her wet crotch. Rachel took her jeans off. Her panties followed quickly. She searched for her vibrator. It was always Steven's hard cock pushing into her. It wasn't just a toy. The vibrator was safely tucked under her pillow, just where she last left it.

Rachel lay down again. She resumed fingering herself. She imagined Steven lying next to her kissing her and exploring her body. His sweet words melted her nervousness away. She wanted him desperately. The hard tip of his penis touched her lips as he prepared to enter her.

He stopped. "Are you sure about this?" his voice echoed in Rachel's mind.

"Yes," Rachel answered urgent to feel him inside her.

Penetration. It hurt initially. Rachel almost cried. Steven started to pull out, but she stopped him. The back stroke of his penis sent shivers through her. It was wonderful. If he'd stopped then, Rachel would've cried.

In and out, slowly. Waves of ecstasy coursed through Rachel. She moaned softly. She knew it wasn't really Steven, but the images were so real. It felt like him. He moved faster…faster. Rachel's moans grew louder. She was close to orgasm. Her finger turned on the vibrator.

It was such a wonderful release. She came over and over. The side of the vibrator rubbed against her clitoris. The sensation sent Rachel into ecstasy. She came again and again. Her hips gyrated. Sweat wetted her skin. The final orgasm was intense. She cried out and relaxed.

Finally, sleep could come. It had been a while since Rachel last masturbated. Too long. She felt pretty good. But sleep did not come. Rachel sighed and climbed off the bed. She grabbed her towel and shampoo and walked quickly to the shower. She didn't mind walking around half nude. She was getting used to the eyes pawing over her.

The warm water pelted Rachel's back. It was nice. She hummed Aerosmith's song "Angel" as she got clean. It was one of her favorites. She remembered Steven lying in front of her face. He ran his fingers through her hair gently after they'd made love. He told her how much he loved the long red locks.

At the time Rachel's hair fell to her butt. Steven said he'd be heartbroken if she ever cut it off. She promised to keep her hair long. Then he said he had been in love with her all through high school.

"I love you, Rachel." He voice was sincere. His caress told the same story. Rachel cried when he said those words. "What's wrong, darling?"

"Nothing," Rachel had assured him. "I never thought anyone could be in love with me. Especially you."

"You're the nicest girl in school. I've loved you since the day we met. I do now. I always will."

Those word fed Rachel's passion. She'd reached out and caressed his face. Now, for some reason, Rachel couldn't remember his beautiful face. It broke her heart.

Rachel turned the water off. Her hair was growing back quickly. It was just past her shoulders now. The day Rachel heard the news that Steven was dead, she shave every strand from her head. She remembered hearing about Native Americans doing that, centuries ago as a sign of mourning.

She wore a fancy hat to hide her baldness at his memorial service. When no one was looking, Rachel had lifted the coffin lid. He was mangled badly. His beautiful face was bloodied and smashed. Rachel almost threw up. She swallowed the bile out of respect to her lover. She kissed him passionately on his mangled lips.

"I love you. I always have. I always will." She placed her tightly braided hair in his cold broken hands. "I want you to have this, my love. It is a symbol of my vow to you. I will never cut my hair again, for you."

"Rachel?" Sheryl's voice brought Rachel back to the present. "Are you okay? What's wrong?"

She realized she was crying, sobbing loudly. "I'm alright," she lied.

Sheryl pulled back the shower curtain. Her blue eyes were filled with worry. "You don't sound alright."

Rachel wiped her face on her towel. "I'm sorry. I was just thinking about an old friend."

"Steven?"

Rachel was shocked. She never said anything to Sheryl about him. "Did my mom tell you?"

"No," Sheryl answered honestly. "I've heard you cry out for him in your sleep. You do it a lot when you're stressed out."

"What else do you know?"

"Just his name. That's all I understand."

"Oh," Rachel sighed.

"Was he an old boyfriend?"

"Kind of. We were friends in high school. We only went on one date."

Sheryl scowled, "So he was that kind of friend?"

Rachel shook her head sadly. "No. It wasn't like that at all. It was beautiful. He was beautiful. He loved me. I loved him."

"What happened?" Sheryl was really confused.

"He died the day after prom. Our only date."

"Oh, sweetie, that's horrible."

"He was run off the road by a sleeping truck driver. His body was shredded. My heart was too. I gave him all of my hair."

Sheryl stood there silently offering her shoulder to Rachel. She stoked Rachel's hair softly. Is this what ate at Rachel everyday since they met? Sheryl felt tears stinging her eyes.

Sheryl stepped back, "You need to have some fun tonight. Come on let's get you dressed."

Rachel nodded silently and wrapped her towel around herself. Sheryl grabbed Rachel's belongings and led the way to their room. Rachel was surprised to find Casey sitting on Sheryl's bed again. He smiled warmly at her. Rachel's stomach fluttered.

"Hi," Rachel greeted in a raspy voice.

Casey wrinkled his forehead. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine now. Thank you for asking."

"That's good to hear. I hope to see you at my party tonight."

Rachel smiled. Casey was so sweet. "I'll be there."

Rachel turned to rummage through the closet. She frowned; nothing good to wear. All of her clothes were so boring. Jeans, t-shirts and sweaters, nothing pretty. She chose a pair of newer jeans and her nicest sweater. It wasn't much, but it was the best she could do.

Her towel fell to the floor. This was embarrassing. Casey was still sitting there on the bed. She could see his eyes sweeping over her naked body in the mirror on the closet door. Rachel blushed hard. She was used to walking around the dorm in just a t-shirt, but it was different being completely naked in front of strange eyes. Casey averted his eyes.

Rachel put on a matching pair of royal blue satin thong panties and a lacey royal blue bra. She always liked wearing sexy underwear for some reason. She never expected anyone else to see them, but they made her feel kind of sexy.

Rachel felt a lot more comfortable with underwear on. She went and sat next to Casey on the bed. She noticed a slight bulge in his jeans and blushed again. Why did she look? This was so awkward.

She looked at Sheryl. Sheryl was just sitting at the desk and watching the situation. She looked highly amused.

"I don't have anything good to wear. Maybe I should go shopping before the party."

"Good idea," Sheryl agreed.

"Do you want to come with me?"

"That's cool, get dressed and I'll drive."

Casey was feeling his erection intensely. It was becoming painful. Rachel had such a marvelous body. Her hips were wide and curvy. Her back was graceful. Her vertebrae show just barely through her skin. Her breasts looked so soft. Her belly, thighs and calves were firm and sinewy. She must exercise often. He couldn't wait to see what she would wear at the party. But he needed to take of himself before that.

"I think, I'll go home and wait for you two there," Casey said softly.

Rachel's eyes wandered to his pants again. Why? Rachel looked into his vivid blue eyes and smiled. He was so attractive. She wanted to talk to him more. She remembered where she'd seen him. He was in many of her classes. That meant he was smart too.

"Do you have a lot of work to do?" Rachel asked.

"Not much." He studied her face. She had thousands of freckles all over her nose and cheeks. They accented her beauty. Her red lips were full and fixed in a smile, which lit up her very sexy green eyes. He never noticed just how pretty she was. "All I need to do is get the keg and some snack food," Casey continued.

"When we get done shopping, I could help you with the finishing touches if you want," Rachel offered. She was surprised at her own boldness. She was never this out going. Her heart raced in her chest. "If it's okay with you, that is."

"I'd like the help," Casey returned warmly.

Rachel and Sheryl arrived at the mall. Rachel rarely went shopping. And this was the first time since high school that she'd come to the mall on a Saturday. There were hundreds of people everywhere. Kids were screaming, laughing, and running around their parents. People piled high with bags from various stores.

This was almost too much. Rachel wanted to just turn around and leave. But Sheryl was standing right beside her, blocking the path to the door. Rachel slowly walked through the sea of people. Sheryl stayed close by her side. It was a great comfort having Sheryl so close.