08

This is the continuation of the story from the first six chapters. Some people are enjoying it and some not. I hope you can continue to put up with this long romance that has some sex in it. It was just something I had to write.

Christmas holidays, 2006.

It was Christmas again, and I was at home. It was great seeing the family all gathered together. I was still single and enjoying attacking the singles life in Chicago, albeit with some care. We all went to the large mall nearby between Christmas and New Year's for some sales and to get out of the house. I was walking along, doing window shopping, when I saw her. Up ahead, standing there, holding some bags was Jennifer. No mistake. I started to turn away when she turned and saw me. She smiled a sad but happy-to-see-you smile, and my breath caught like it always did. Nothing had changed and she still owned my heart. Damn her!

We stared at each other for a second and then she came toward me, smiling. I tried to smile, but I knew it had to look forced. She was still gorgeous and I still had feelings for her. It was going to be tough.

Then from a store on the other side of the mall came a small strawberry blonde girl, seemingly about 4 or 5. "Mommy! Mommy! Look what I got!" She ran straight toward Jennifer holding an ice cream cone. Trailing in her wake was a woman that I knew was Jennifer's sister. I had met her once, but couldn't remember her name.

Jennifer turned, squatted down, and smiled that fantastically wide smile that I remembered. Her entire face lit up when she smiled at the little girl. The one I got was nothing like that. Why did I care? "Ooohh. That looks good. What flavor is it?"

"Vanilla! I only like vanilla, Mommy, you know that."

Jennifer took the little girl's left hand while the right was occupied with the ice cream and led her over to me. I was trying not to stare. I knew that Jennifer was a mother; that she had a daughter. That meant that she had moved on with her life. Meanwhile, I was... still hooked.

Jennifer introduced us. "Angela, this is a friend of mine from college named Dennis. Can you say hello to him?"

"Hello, Mr. Dennis."

I bent over and looked into the prettiest blue eyes I had ever seen. They were luminous. "It's very nice to meet you Angela. You are a very pretty little girl." She smiled and said thank you; trained well by her mother. I looked up at Jennifer, hoping to get through this with minimal effort. "You still look wonderful. And you have a beautiful daughter."

"Thank you. You look good. Work and Chicago must agree with you."

"Yes, well, I've thrown myself into my work and I love Chicago. The winters are a little hard, but the town and the people are great."

"Not married yet? Nobody has tied you down yet?"

She asked that so nonchalantly. I was trying not to hyperventilate. "No, not married or tied down. No steady girlfriend right now." I wanted to ask her about a husband, but she moved right along.

"How is your family?" She continued talking like we were old friends that hadn't broken up under terrible circumstances. It had been six years and she may have moved on, but I was still under some spell from the damn woman. Her eyes still riveted me.

"Everyone is doing well. Parents are still healthy and the siblings are great. How about you?" I managed to remain calm on the outside, but inside my heart was hammering. Her sister walked up at that point.

"You remember my sister Diane, right? She works with me here in the mall."

"Hi, Dennis." I could have gotten frostbite from her piercing glare.

"Good to see you Diane. What do you two do in the mall?"

"We both work at the travel agency at the end of the mall, near the western entrance."

"Oh, right. I seem to remember that that was your mother's travel agency."

"Yes, well, she wanted to retire, so Diane and I took it over."

"That's great. I hope things are going well." I tried to start my retreat. "Listen, I need to catch up to some of my family. We're supposed to meet over at the food court."

"Okay." Jennifer's eyes seemed to mist over a little... or maybe that was mine. "Tell everyone we said hello. It was great seeing you."

"Yeah, it was great seeing you guys again." I turned to leave but turned back to watch them go. Jennifer was still beautiful, had a wonderful figure, and I wanted to grab her and kiss her before she left again. But alas, I had no such attack of fortitude. As they left I noticed that Jennifer and Diane were talking heatedly. I suppose I was getting torched by Diane. The little girl was eating her ice cream.

*******Jennifer *******

I was waiting for Diane and Angela, almost exhausted from the Christmas shopping, when it hit. That feeling that somebody was watching me. It was something I hadn't felt for a while. I turned around slowly, checking out the faces of the other shoppers. When I got around to behind me, I saw him. Dennis! He was just turning like he was going to run away. I guess that let me know how he felt. He must still hate me; wasn't even going to say hello. Well, once our eyes met, I figured I better at least say hello.

I started walking towards him when Angela came barreling out of the ice cream store with her cone, courtesy of Diane.

"Mommy! Mommy! Look what I got!" She ran straight toward me holding her cone, Diane trailing behind.

"Ooohh. That looks good. What flavor is it?"

"Vanilla! I only like vanilla, Mommy, you know that."

I took Angela's hand and led her over to Dennis. This was going to be difficult, but when I got there I was able to introduce Angela without my voice cracking. "Angela, this is a friend of mine from college named Dennis. Can you say hello to him?"

"Hello, Mr. Dennis."

He leaned over and said hello. "It's very nice to meet you Angela. You are a very pretty little girl." Then he stood back up and looked at me. "You still look wonderful. And you have a beautiful daughter."

I wanted to jump into his arms and tell him that he was a father. I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I opted for the coward's route. "Thank you. You look good. Work and Chicago must agree with you."

"Yes, well, I've thrown myself into my work and I love Chicago. The winters are a little hard, but the town and the people are great."

"Not married yet? Nobody has tied you down yet?" He deserved to be happy, but I still wanted him. Why couldn't I tell him? I still felt guilty. Even after all this time, I knew I had lied to him about the night of sex, but now an even bigger lie was consuming my life... and I felt guilty about that, too.

"No, not married or tied down. No steady girlfriend right now."

I continued with the standard drivel. "How is your family?"

"Everyone is doing well. Parents are still healthy and the siblings are great. How about you?"

I wanted to yell out that it was fucking hard being a single mother and not being able to tell the father that he had a daughter. I decided to change the subject and introduced my sister. "You remember Diane, right? She works with me here in the mall."

"Hi, Dennis." Diane stayed back and her hello sounded more like an accusation.

"Good to see you Diane. What do you two do in the mall?"

"We both work at the travel agency at the end of the mall, near the western entrance."

"Oh, right. I seem to remember that that was your mother's travel agency."

I guess his mother didn't tell him everything. "Yes, well, she wanted to retire, so Diane and I took it over."

"That's great. I hope things are going well. Listen, I need to catch up to some of my family. We're supposed to meet over at the food court." 3 minutes and he was ready to be on his way. I guess this part of my past was closed.

"Okay." My voice was going to crack if I had to talk any longer. "Tell everyone we said hello. It was great seeing you."

"Yeah, it was great seeing you guys again." And then he turned and left. We turned around and started walking away.

As soon as he was out of hearing, Diane started in on me. "I thought you said that you would tell him about 'her'?" She nodded toward Angela, who, fortunately, was eating her ice cream and not listening.

"And this is where I should do that? The middle of the mall?"

"Where else? You won't call him. You won't email him."

I started tearing up. Diane saw it and I could see her face soften. "I'm still in love with him, Diane. I know that as sure as I know I have a daughter. As soon as I saw him my heart hurt and I just couldn't tell him. I still feel guilty about how we broke up and now about keeping this other secret for 6 years." I motioned toward Angela.

Diane put her arm around me. "Okay. I'm sorry. I should have seen more clearly how you were reacting to him. What about Dennis? Did you see any indication that he might still feel that way?"

"No. When I first saw him it looked like he was going to run full speed in the opposite direction."

Diane continued to hold me as we made our way back to work. It was going to be a long day.

*******Dennis *******

I found my family where we had agreed to meet and told them that I had seen Jennifer. There was a moment of silence. I looked around. "What?"

My mother finally spoke. "We have run into her several times while in the mall. She is always very nice. She has a beautiful daughter and now owns that travel agency at the end. I also know that she is not married. I don't know what happened, but her mother retired and is taking care of the little girl while Jennifer and Diane run the travel agency. I really like her Dennis. Every time we meet her she has nothing but good things to say about you and asks about you every time."

"Well... I can't talk about it. It's too personal and painful."

My family just looked at me and didn't push it. We had been thru this once before.

I knew that I had caught Jennifer fever again and it was going to take a long time to get over it.

Chapter 8.

4 months later, April 2007

*******Dennis *******

I had just completed another delivery of one of my software projects and was returning from a couple of drinks celebrating when I ran into the girl I had been dating, Sarah. She was knocking on my front door. "Oh, there you are. I wanted to come over, but you weren't answering your cell or home phones."

"I think my cell is dead. C'mon in." I opened the door and we went inside. Sarah was a very nice person and I liked her. We had good sex, too. But she wanted to move into a deeper relationship and after seeing Jennifer at Christmas I knew that I couldn't have a permanent relationship with this woman until I was for sure over Jennifer.

She moved into my arms and kissed me. She seemed a little drunk. I was horny and sex with her was always fantastic. I was a little drunk too, so I picked her up and carried her to my bed. She giggled.

"Oh, mister, whatever are you going to do to this poor little girl?"

I smiled. "Well, honey, I have to give you a check up. You need to take off all your clothes and then I have a probe that I will have to use to check some of your orifices."

She laughed. "Hmmm. I like having my orifices probed."

I put her down and stripped her. I took off my own clothes quickly, too. Damn, I wanted to fuck her.

I looked down at her voluptuous little body. She was a curvy girl, with nice hips, large tits, a small waist, and dark hair. Her eyes were startlingly blue, standing out against her blue-black hair. Her nipples and "other" lips were a little darker than some women with light skin, but that set her off again, too. I leaned over and kissed her on the mouth, sucking on her tongue, groping her tits. I slowly kissed my way down her cheekbone and across her neck, all the while tugging on her nipples. She was already breathing hard, almost panting. I moved to suck and nibble on a nipple and ran my hands down to her dark outer-lipped pussy. She was starting to get wet, but I still spent plenty of time on her nipples. They were so sensitive that I could almost get her to orgasm just sucking on them. Finally I moved to her pussy and went straight in. I peeled back her outer lips and ran my tongue thru the inner ones. Now she started moaning and squirming. I placed a finger at her entrance and pushed. It went right in. I moved up and started dragging the rough part of my tongue over her clit, again and again. I knew that that drove her nuts. She was moaning loudly now. I put a second finger in and was lapping and nibbling at her clit. I knew she was close and she started tensing. I suddenly stopped and she looked up like I was stealing candy from a baby. I moved up, placed my dick at her entrance as she watched closely, and buried it. She groaned and when I hit her pubic bone and rubbed against her clit she reached her orgasm. I went slow for a minute and then started pounding her.

She started whimpering. "Oh, yes... fuck me Dennis... fuck me... shit... oh, fuck... fuck... fuck... FUCK!!" Her orgasm was amazing this time and she was shaking and her pussy was quivering all over my dick and I buried myself one last time and came. I spurted and spurted until it felt like I was bone dry. Even my mouth was dry. I slowly withdrew and collapsed on the bed next to her. She was panting and I was still working on catching my breath.

She turned and looked at me closely. Without saying a word she got up and went to the bathroom. I rolled off the bed and padded into the kitchen to get some water.

When I came back with some water bottles she was getting into bed, apparently spending the night. That was not unusual and it was late, so I crawled in next to her and we were asleep in no time.

*******Jennifer *******

After several months of testing the news from the doctors about Angela was not good. They had run many tests and finally diagnosed it as aplastic anemia. It was a terrible disease. It is a condition where the bone marrow does not produce sufficient new cells to replenish blood cells. They told me she had a mild case, but that they recommended drastic treatment to try to cure her. It was a difficult procedure and decision and my marrow, after testing, turned out to not be a good match. Now I was on my way to Dennis' apartment to ask for his help. I had no idea how to tell him. I just knew that I had to get there and see if he was a close enough match to save my... no, make that our daughter's life. I pulled up to his apartment and sat for a minute, trying to compose myself before approaching his door.

*******Dennis *******

I woke up about 9am, unable to sleep any later even after staying up late. I rolled out of bed and left Sarah there sleeping. I started making some scrambled eggs and bacon when she came out of the bathroom already dressed.

"Do you want some breakfast?"

She turned to me and stared. "What's her name?"

I looked up, trying to follow that leap of logic. "Who?"

"The woman who is still in your head that won't let you move on and commit to me. Don't lie; I can feel her like she's in the room with us. It's gotten worse after Christmas."

I looked down and away from her. I couldn't look at her pleading eyes. "Jennifer."

"When did you meet and break up?"

"We were together a year in college and broke up right when I moved here six years ago last Christmas."

There was silence. I looked up and she was staring at me. "Six... fucking... years?" She was shocked. "You're still carrying around a flame for her? Jesus, I guess I'd better move on. If you can't by now, there's no hope for us".

"I'm sorry. I ran into her in a mall this past Christmas and can't get her out of my head. I've always loved her. We broke it off because of something that came between us, but I can't get past it." By now I could barely keep from breaking down.

She walked up to me. "Then what are you doing without her? Why aren't you pursuing her if she still drives you that nuts? What the fuck, Dennis? Do something so that you can get back with her or move on."

She teared up and held me for a couple of minutes. Finally, she pulled away. "I gotta go. You need to either get over her or go get her. You can't live like this. I would love to be with you, but I can't live with you as long as you have her in your head."

I looked up at her and gave her a weak smile. "Since when did you become such an adult and dispenser of advice?"

She tried to laugh, but it rang false. "I don't know, but I have to get out of here." She turned and headed out the door. She opened it and standing there, ready to knock was Jennifer. My breath caught and I almost couldn't breathe. They were both stunned into silence and I was staring. Sarah looked back at me, saw my face, then back at Jennifer. She held out her hand. "Sarah."

Jennifer looked from me back to Sarah. "Jennifer, glad to meet you."

I could see Sarah look Jennifer up and down, taking her measure. "Figures." And she pushed her way past Jennifer and left.

Jennifer stood there, waiting and staring. I was still gaping. She gave me one of her patented smiles. I tried to be nice; realizing my thinking on this had changed. "Oh, I'm sorry. Please come in."

Jennifer entered and looked around. She looked over at me cooking breakfast. "Oh, god, that smells good. I left home at 4 this morning to come here. Is there still some left?"

"Yeah, sure, Sarah and I never started."

"Ummm. Sorry about that. I didn't mean to interrupt anything with your girlfriend."

"Well, it appears that she's no longer my girlfriend." I almost said 'not after seeing you', but held it back.

I changed the subject. "The scrambled eggs are ready. Grab the plates there."

She picked up the plates on the table and we ate in an awkward silence. I tried not to watch her, and every time I looked up, she was staring at me. Finally, we finished and I picked up the plates and put them away.

*******Jennifer *******

I had just raised my hand to knock when the door opened and a woman was standing there with a mad glare on her face. Uh-oh!

She put her hand out. "Sarah."

I shook it. "Jennifer, glad to meet you."

She looked me up and down closely, like she was evaluating me. It felt weird. Then she turned back to Dennis.

"Figures!"

She pushed her way past me and was gone. I guess she and Dennis must have had a fight or a falling out. She was not happy. I was left standing there staring at Dennis. Finally, he invited me in and I smelled the eggs. I hadn't eaten since I woke up to drive all the way up here and my stomach growled. "Oh, god, that smells good. I left home at 4 this morning to come here. Is there still some left?"

"Yeah, sure, Sarah and I never started."

"Ummm. Sorry about that. I didn't mean to interrupt anything with your girlfriend."

"Well, it appears that she's no longer my girlfriend. The scrambled eggs are ready. Grab the plates there."

I picked them up and we ate a silent breakfast. I could see he wanted to know what I was doing there. He didn't appear to be mad about me showing up. I just knew that I still loved him and wanted to feel close to him again. I wanted him to hold me. I wanted comfort for me and my daughter. I wanted everything to be alright. I think I wanted to have sex with him and see what it was like again. I couldn't exactly explain why. That wasn't necessarily the closeness I really needed, but my hormones were on overdrive being in his presence again.

Once he finished putting the dishes in the sink, I decided to get to the task at hand.

*******Dennis *******

When I turned around from the sink she was standing right in front of me. She leaned in and kissed me and I took her into my arms. I couldn't stop myself. I kissed her hard and her body felt so right in mine. Her lips tasted just like I remembered, she smelled the same, and I knew I was in trouble. I felt like an alcoholic who had just fallen off the wagon and would have to start the 12 steps all over again.