Life Is Too Short

Welcome to the third chapter. There's very little sexual content, and there are definitely no characters under 18 engaging in sexual acts.

There will be four chapters posted. All are completed and will appear in sequence with a day or two between. Please provide a rating and I welcome comments. Your thoughts are what I need to improve.

To recap, Ted's divorce is underway and he is now living with his best friend, Dave, and Dave's wife, Allie. Dave has since died, but before he passed he urged Ted to consider a relationship with Allie once he was gone. This created a strange dynamic for Ted and Allie. Initially they seemed to become very close to a relationship, but as chapter 2 ended, Allie was pulling back, and even suggested that Dave should see other women.

And now, to chapter 3.

*****

Life is Too Short -- Chapter 3

It took a number of weeks for my realtor to find me houses to look at that would suit my needs. One in particular caught my eye, and Allie really liked it, too. It was a 2800-square-foot, four-bedroom ranch house. The master suite was on the opposite side of the house from the other three bedrooms. It had an attached, two-car garage that was perfect. A fully finished walkout basement was set up for parties, had a pool table, and an enclosed patio complete with a fairly new hot tub. The kitchen and master suite needed work, especially the master bath. But the price was right to make it all possible.

Several days later, Allie and I were looking at that house a second time while preparing an offer with the realtor. Just as I signed the offer sheet, my phone rang and I noticed it was Pam.

"Hi, Pam. What's up?"

"Ted, Kelsi's in the hospital in labor."

"Geez, it's a little early, isn't it?"

"Only by two weeks, but everything is okay. Kelsi's doing fine."

"I'll be right there. Tell her to keep her legs crossed until I get there."

She chuckled at my joke. She hadn't appreciated my humor for quite some time. "Yeah, right. I'm sure that's an option."

Allie and I both went to the hospital, and only waited a few hours when we learned that Breton Theodore Lawson had made his grand entrance. A few hours later I held my grandson for the first time, and I fell in love again.

"Kelsi, you and Bret do really nice work. He's beautiful."

"He looks good in your arms, old man."

"Old man?" Where's the respect?"

"There's no one on this planet I respect more than you dad. And you'll be a fantastic grandfather. What do you want to be called, grandpop?"

"I prefer pop pop, if that's okay."

"Pop pop it is. Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you, old man!"

I chuckled at my princess. She was now a mommy and she'll be a great one. "I love you too, sweetie. More and more every day!"

During the drive home, my realtor called and informed me that my offer was accepted. She wasn't sure when we could settle, but I had no specific timetable.

Allie was giving me that fake smile again before she turned to look out her window. I wondered if the reality of my moving was causing her to have second thoughts. If that was the case, I hoped she would tell me. But she said nothing.

*****

Every prior Sunday, Allie would sit with me in church along with Pam, Kelsi, and Bret. I guess folks thought we were an odd group since they all knew that my divorce from Pam was now final. My three family members were still busy with a newborn, so I knew Allie and I would be going alone that particular Sunday. The service was getting ready to start, and I couldn't find her. During the first hymn I finally noticed her. She was sitting with Lenny Hawkins and his grown kids.

She warned me that she wanted to sit with some friends and avoid Pam, but I thought she meant friends who were women. Lenny was a widower who was a little younger than me, but he had the unmistakable look of someone who had let his physical health and appearance go. He had to be sixty or seventy pounds overweight, and his face was marred with scars that may have come from a really bad case of acne when he was young. He was a pleasant guy and, to be honest, I liked him. But he was way below the level of someone deserving of Allie. I chastised myself for thinking so judgmentally, but seeing them together I couldn't stop drawing comparisons to the beauty and the beast.

I had no idea what the sermon was about. I was fighting the green monster in my mind the whole service. I had to calm myself for the drive home. I held the door for her, got in my side, and started the car.

I couldn't wait any longer.

"I looked for you before the service. What happened?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. Lenny asked if I'd join him. I couldn't find you to let you know."

"Oh, okay."

"Are you upset with me?"

"No, Allie. Why would I be upset? You told me you may not be sitting with me anymore. I just didn't know what happened and, without Kelsi and the crew there, I was just... alone."

"Geez, Ted. I'm sorry. Why didn't I think of that?"

"No, it's okay. I knew you didn't want to sit with Pam, but she wasn't there today. I just, well, assumed... you know?"

"Why? You're not jealous, are you?"

I laughed to avoid how serious this was to me. "If you must know, yes. But I have no right to be."

"Well, don't be. Okay? He's not only my insurance agent, but Dave and I used to socialize with Lenny and his wife before she passed. I felt bad ignoring him since Sylvia died, and now I'm in a position to understand how he feels."

That day was not like any other Sunday. I was having trouble hiding my hurt feelings from her not sitting with me. I don't think she noticed, but she seemed quieter too. Like it or not, our relationship was changing. Unfortunately, it didn't feel like the change was in the direction I wanted.

*****

Later that week I learned that settlement on my new house would take several months. A few days later I had a builder friend with me at Allie's place so we could start on renovation plans. I really wanted Allie there to give a female perspective on the plan so I made sure she was with me. I gave him the list of what I wanted in a kitchen remodel, master suite update, and a few other details. Allie really helped, especially when we talked about the kitchen redesign. I also opted to have all the flooring replaced and the rooms painted. I wanted everything to be a cream color. Allie smacked me and told me I was "such a man" and "boring", and that we'd give him the color palette later.

I accepted the plans from the builder and scheduled him to start the day after I took possession. He would begin with the floors and painting in the rooms not being heavily renovated so I could move in by the Monday the week following and live there while the major work was being done.

I realized I didn't have any bedroom furniture and Allie agreed to help me pick a master bedroom suite that could be delivered in time for my move. We also selected a lot of pieces for other rooms for my eventual permanent move-in. She was noticeably acting strange. The moodiness she was exhibiting was not normal for her. The constant smile was still there, but it felt more like a mask. The Allie I knew was naturally joyful and transparent with her emotions. She clearly didn't like that I was moving, and yet I knew she understood it was the right thing to do.

Things kept getting uncomfortable at home as the week progressed, but they were about to get even worse. That Sunday, Allie sat with some of her friends instead of with me, Kelsi, Bret, Junior, and Pam. Kelsi noticed and asked me if everything was okay. I lied and said we were fine, and that Allie was a bit uncomfortable around Pam.

Then, things got more than strange. They got weird.

After the service, Rena Hayes scurried towards me like a woman on a mission. Rena was in her early sixties, somewhere just over five foot tall and a bit pudgy, but not in an unattractive way. Her short, brown hair with gray streaks didn't hide the most scary, brown eyes I'd ever seen. There was an intensity in those eyes that made me fear I was in the presence of a feral woman hunting her next meal. She had a kinda pretty face, though, for a man-eating predator.

"Ted! Ted, I'm glad I caught you."

"Oh, Hi Ren--"

"I hear you're unattached. I thought you were with Allie now that you ditched Pam, but she says you're just friends."

"Yeah, that's--"

"Well, I'm single too and I think we need to get to know each other. You're coming to my house for dinner tomorrow at 6:00."

"I'm not sure I--"

"No ifs, ands, or buts. Be there and we'll have a nice evening getting to know each other."

"I don't know if--"

"Is Italian okay? Everybody likes pasta."

"Uh, sure, I--"

"Great. My address is in the church directory. Don't be late! Bye."

I didn't know what the hell happened. It was like a tornado swooped by and swept me up. Well, Allie wanted me to see other women, so I had a date. Something about her made me fear I may not survive it.

The drive home was interesting. Allie was looking at me strangely. "Did I see you talking with Rena?"

"If you could call it that. I never got to say a full sentence."

"What would she want from you?"

"Evidently, a date. Somehow, I'm going to her house tomorrow for dinner. I don't know why, I don't think I particularly want to go, but she's some force to handle."

I thought I saw steam coming outta Allie's ears.

"Don't you know about her?"

"Uh, I--"

"She's a geriatric version of a teenage slut. Geez, Ted. I thought you should see some other ladies, but Rena is nothing but a booty call for a stable of horny old men. Is that what you're looking for?"

"I didn't--"

"No, you didn't think at all. So are you going?"

"I mean, it wouldn't hurt to--"

"To what, dip your wick in the well-used fountain? I didn't think you were like that!"

"Damn it, Allie. Can someone let me finish a sentence today?"

"What?"

"I'm not looking to get laid tomorrow. It's really clear that she's not my type, but I haven't had a date in fifty years. I gotta start somewhere. Hopefully, I'll escape with my virtue and dignity."

"Whatever!"

Ah, the universal disagreement-ending word. No admission of right or wrong, just "whatever." I was seriously gonna cancel with Rena, but I was pissed and had to go through with it just to protect my dignity. Then, a realization hit me. Allie was jealous! That fact caused a ray of hope to crack through the dark clouds.

The rest of the afternoon it was kinda frosty around the house. It wasn't anywhere near as bad as my days with Pam, but there was a certain familiarity about the atmosphere.

*****

I did eighteen miles Monday, and returned home to the smell of bacon. Allie looked at me, and smiled sheepishly.

"Good morning. Before you say anything, Ted, I'm sorry for yesterday. I had no right to act the way I did."

"Well, good morning to you, too. I guess we're both struggling a bit trying to define... well, to define us."

"Yeah, you're right. You know I care a lot about you, don't you?"

"Yes, I do. I really cherish our relationship too. Well, I've told you how I fell. But I also realized that, since I've started staying here with you, you've really become my best friend."

"Okay, big guy. Time to bring it in and give me a big hug!"

Time is a funny thing. I don't know how long that hug lasted. I only know it was the same feeling as the relationship between time and life--it ended too soon.

I did some personal chores and errands during the day, then got ready for my big date. I had hoped that I'd be able to complete a sentence that evening, and maybe even gain some knowledge about the dating scene since I was a novice.

The time came and I drove to the den of the lioness that was Rena. Wine in hand, I only got to knock once when the door flung open.

"Ted! Come in. Come in. Oooo, you brought a bottle of red. That looks like it will be good and will go perfect with dinner. Speaking of good-looking, you look good enough to eat yourself. Grab a seat at the table and I'll serve up the pasta. There's a corkscrew in the middle hutch drawer. You can open up the wine while you wait."

"Okay. By the way, you look lovely tonight."

I felt triumphant! My first full sentence finally made it completely through my lips.

"Aren't you sweet? Go ahead and get seated. I'll be right back."

She actually looked quite beautiful. Her dark blue dress complemented her pleasingly full figure. If my eyes were accurately assessing things, I don't think she had a bra on, but things were held together pretty well. She was barefoot, which I guess was normal in her house.

Rena made an art form of talking while eating, drinking, and doing anything else. I swear she never took a breath. First she told me all about herself. Then, she suggested we talk about me, but she really meant that she would talk about me. I swear she knew as much about me as the FBI knows about the president. She told me about myself, and all I could do was nod or maybe grunt in agreement.

I wanted to let my mind wander, but I was afraid I wouldn't grunt at the right time. Finally, she paused long enough to fetch dessert from the kitchen. This is where men are at a disadvantage. To get a man to shut up, all a woman has to do is the same she does for a crying baby--shove a boob in his mouth. I had no clue how to shut up Rena. I know--dirty minds have a solution, but that's not always an option.

She returned and I braced for more torture-by-talking.

"Okay, Ted. Here's how I float. I'm not looking for a husband. I don't need money. I don't even want a romance or any lovey-dovey relationship. I have a warp-drive libido, and I like to enjoy different men. There are three others right now who pay me regular visits.

"I--"

"Don't interrupt and don't you dare think I'm a whore. I know what I am. I'm a perpetually horny lady. I don't kiss on the mouth, I don't do cuddles or sleepovers. Come here, I want to show you something."

She grabbed my hand and started to lead me somewhere. I had a feeling where it would be. She talked the entire trip so I couldn't get in a word. No surprise, we were in a downstairs bedroom.

"This is my playroom. My real bedroom is upstairs and is only for me."

As she spoke, she lifted her dress to remove it and I quickly realized that it was the only thing she was wearing. Startled by the sight, I was speechless, not that I got to say much anyway.

She dropped to her knees and started rubbing Mr. Johnson through my clothes. A gasp was all I could manage.

"Oooh. Someone is ready to play. Tell me, Ted, I know Pam wasn't very good company for a long time. How long since you've cleaned the pipes--with a woman, I mean?" She giggled at her own little joke.

"Uh, about twelve years."

"Oh, Damn. We better clear out the backed-up stuff first."

And that began an evening on the dirty side of the street. At first, I wanted to push her away, but... well, twelve years is a long damn time. Mr. Johnson had control of me, and Rena most definitely had control of him. I was third in command and seemed to have very little say in the events that ensued.

Once I was fully spent, I was laying on my back next to Rena enjoying both the silence and the experience. Without much emotion or fanfare, she rolled toward me.

"Okay, I hope you had fun, I know I did. No overnights, no kiss goodbye, all right? But you know where I am if the mood strikes. I'm heading up to my room to shower and sleep, so you can let yourself out and be sure to lock the door for me. Bye, sweetie."

"Uh, bye."

I may not have paid her anything, but I couldn't imagine a night with a pro going much differently--except for the dinner.

I drove home totally confused but with a big smile. My body felt like I just lost an MMA match. For her build, Rena was very flexible and maniacally energetic. Sex with her was like being in the sack with a cartoon female Tasmanian devil who also had a motor mouth that wouldn't stop. And her streaming dialog during pleasurable acts would make a shipload of sailors blush.

My emotions were definitely mixed. I was sorry I gave in to her yet glad I did. The "guilty as hell" feeling was counterbalanced by waves of pleasure still sending tingles up and down my spine--not to mention a few other key locations. One thing for sure, though, I was never going back.

Allie was waiting for me when I walked in. She took one look at my face and knew. "I told you. I guess virtue and dignity lost out. Proud of yourself?"

Once again, I couldn't read her. The words sounded like she was pissed, but her face still had that sweet smile.

"Proud? No. I should have listened to you. There's no way I'm ever gonna see her again, but I can't deny that I needed tonight. It's been so long, you know?"

"Oh, what, a year?" I thought you were the kind of guy that needed love to be intimate."

"You think I've only gone a year without? Geez, Allie, it's been over twelve years. That's... what... like thirty percent of my married life. I think I was overdue."

Allie's eyes opened wide. Her mouth was wide open and she looked shocked. "Twelve? You mean... you and Pam haven't..."

"Yeah, we haven't. Listen, I know you and I aren't in the kind of relationship where we discuss such things, but my libido still rages on like mad, and I'm not the kind of guy who can cheat. So, yeah, I was weak tonight."

"Twelve years! Wait... that means that Dave was probably the last man to be with Pam?"

"Yep. Weird, isn't it? The woman can't handle having sex, so her last time was while committing adultery."

Seemingly stunned, Allie plopped down on the sofa while I bid her goodnight and wandered off to bed to enjoy what afterglow remained.

I slept like a baby that night. I guess I found a better sleep aid than SleepMD. Too bad I didn't have regular access to a willing partner to help cure my insomnia.

*****

The next day, I found my brain starting to twist itself into knots. The Rena adventure was fresh in my mind, and I knew I disappointed Allie with my behavior. My guilt convicted me as if I had cheated on her. I knew how I felt about Allie, but she told me she wasn't ready.

A year ago, I could have called Dave and he would have straightened me out. I needed someone to fill the role of confidant and chief advisor. Like a bolt of lightning, the realization hit me as to who I needed to talk with. Around noon, I called Kelsi.

"Daddy!"

"Hey, Sweetie. How's my favorite girl and my grandson?"

"He's terrific, a real angel. And I'm doing pretty well. What's up?"

"I... I need to talk to you."

"That sounds serious. Are you okay? You're not sick or something, are you?"

"No. Worse. Woman problems."

"Oh, Dad. What'd you do?"

"Can you and I just talk tonight? I'll bring dinner for everyone, if that's okay."

"Sure."

"What's everybody want?"

"I'm dying for Chinese, and I don't care what the others want. I need pampering."

"Okay. I know what everyone likes and I'll just get a bunch of variety. Is 5:00 all right?"

"Yep. Then you and I can talk in Junior's room while you rock him, okay?"

That brought a huge smile to my face and momentarily made me forget how I was screwing things up in my life.

I found Allie to let her know my plans. "Hey, I wanted to let you know I was going over to Kelsi's for dinner. I have a grandson that I really need to hold."

"Good thinking, Grandpa. And that works for me, too. I'm going to Lenny's place this evening to go over some insurance stuff."

"I... I hope you have a good time. If I'm in bed when you get home, I'll... I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay."

She had a strange look on her face. I couldn't read it, but that's no surprise. I sucked at reading women's thoughts or feelings. All I could tell was that she seemed a little off-kilter. One thing was damn sure... I was not happy.