Life After Death

Pip stumbled through the graveyard, the rain a steady deluge that beat down relentlessly on his head. Somewhere in the distance, thunder rumbled and lightning crackled. Wind howled through the darkness of the night, its wail a mirror of the one that echoed in the empty chambers of his heart.

He was a young man, only thirty years old yet already a widower. His tears were lost in the rain as he trod through the mire toward his wife's grave. Once there, he dropped to his knees and bowed his head. The cold wetness sank through his jeans, though he barely registered it.

He fumbled with the small container of pills in his pocket. Pulling it out, he popped the lid and looked down into the small, narrow tunnel of his demise. Thirty small white tablets that could free him from his perpetual misery. Then, he would reunite with his dear Annie.

He looked at the patch of grass beneath the gravestone. "I'll be with you soon, Annie," he whispered.

Another flash of lightning illuminated the gravestone. Pip glared at the dates on it. Two months. Just two months since Annie was so cruelly taken from the world at the hands of a drunk driver. It was a cruel irony that he fought tooth and nail to survive only to have his life wrenched from him.

He closed his eyes and tilted his head back to the sky. He screamed, roaring his anguish into the darkness. Fate and the gods were cruel, they gifted life only to snatch it away without a care, a great game in which there were no winners. He lifted the small canister to his lips. One movement and he could consume the tablets, ending the game on his own terms. He bunched his muscles, willing himself into action. Never before had a weight so light felt so heavy.

The rim of the canister pressed against his lips. He tipped it back but stopped abruptly. A featherlight touch caressed his shoulder. He knew that touch... he dreamed about it every night. The world around him tilted. "Annie!?" he cried.

His head snapped around, sending rivulets of water in all directions. He waited for an answer that did not come.

Another flash and rumble of thunder.

There was another touch on his shoulder, this time harder. It was nudging him toward the cemetery entrance. Annie's voice whispered in his ear,

"RUN! NOW!"

Pip had no idea what to do, but he had never ignored his wife before. He jumped from the floor, shoving the tablets back into his pocket. He sprinted down the gravel path and through the gravestones. As lightning flashed, he glanced behind to check for what he could have mistaken for Annie's voice. A shadowy figure stood beside her grave. Although he could not see its eyes, he sensed it was watching him.

He was still looking behind when he collided with a small figure. He heard a loud scream and then the next thing he recalled was a blinding pain in his eyes. "ARGH!" he cried, clutching his eyes and falling to the ground. It felt as though someone had poured lava into them.

"Stay back!" a woman shouted from somewhere above him with a shaking voice.

"I couldn't move if I wanted to!" Pip spluttered. His nose was running uncontrollably, mixing with his tears and the rain. "What did you do to me!?"

"I pepper sprayed you, you prick!" the woman spat angrily.

"Why!?" Pip moaned.

"Because you attacked me!"

"No, I didn't! I ran into you by accident! Argh, my eyes!" It looked as though his plans to join Annie had been put on hold.

"Well, you should have been looking where you were going, fool!"

Pip was in too much pain to continue arguing, so he rolled over and spent the next few minutes trying to rinse his eyes in a puddle of rainwater. He didn't realise his attacker was watching his pain until she spoke. "Did you drive here?"

"Yes, not that I'm going to be driving back tonight, thanks to you."

"So how are you getting home?"

"I suppose I'll sleep in my car... if I can find it! Why? What do you care?"

"Well, it's sort of my fault, isn't it?"

Pip laughed sarcastically. "Uh, you think!?"

Hands looped under his arms and helped him to stand. "Come here, you can't go home in your current state. I'll drive you there tonight and bring you back to pick up your car tomorrow morning." Pip had no choice but to let her blindly guide him through the rain.

Eventually, they stopped and the woman said, "OK, we're at my car." Her hands left him shortly to open the car door and then returned to push his head down inside. Pip was still unable to open his eyes so he scrunched them tightly together and leaned back into the chair as the engine rumbled to life and the car pulled away.

"So what's your name?" the woman asked.

"Philip, but most people call me Pip. You?"

"Adrianna, but most people call me Addy."

Pip sighed. "Well, Addy, I would say it's nice to meet you but we both know I'd be lying."

Addy snorted. "Likewise. So... what were you doing in a graveyard in this weather so late at night?"

Pip's chest constricted with pain far worse than anything he was experiencing in his eyes. "I was visiting someone," he told her, not wanting to say anything further.

"Ah, me too," Addy replied quietly.

The rest of the journey passed in silence. Addy pulled up outside Pip's house and helped him inside, stopping momentarily for Pip to fumble with his keys. Inside, Addy guided him to the sofa and helped him sit. "Is there anything else you need?" she asked.

Pip shook his head and rubbed his eyes, which only served to make them burn more. "No, you can go now. Thanks for tonight... but no thanks."

Addy ignored him. "Is your wife home? I see the photos of her everywhere."

"N-no, she's dead," Pip choked out. He bowed his head. "She died two months ago."

Her voice became sympathetic. "Oh, I'm sorry." There were swift footsteps and then a gentle hand rested on Pip's shoulder. "Look, I'm going to go home now. I'll come back in the morning and drive you to pick up your car. I don't like the idea of pepper spraying and then ditching you."

Pip patted her hand. "Thanks, but you don't have to. I'll catch a taxi or-"

"No, I'm giving you a lift. It's the least I can do. I'll see you in the morning, take care of yourself, Pip."

Pip grunted and heard his front door open and close. "What a fucking night," he sighed.

*

Pip was woken the following morning by a loud knocking at his front door. His face was a huge, swollen, puffy mess but he was at least able to see. The knocking didn't stop for the full five minutes it took him to pull on some clothes and stumble down his stairs. "ALRIGHT!" he shouted as he changed.

He pulled the door open with an angry growl cut short by the woman on his doorstep. The first thing he noticed was her striking green eyes. They were the colour of pine trees with flecks of gold running through them. She had raven hair that hung in loose waves over her shoulders, full lips, and high cheekbones. She looked to be around the same age as him - somewhere near to the thirty mark.

"Addy?" Pip asked.

She smiled, displaying rows of perfect white teeth flanked by cute dimples. "Yes, that's me. How are you?"

"I've been better." Pip pointed to his face.

She grimaced. "Sorry about that. In my defence, it was in my defence."

Pip quirked a smile. "Come in... I guess." He took Addy into his lounge and offered her a cup of tea. As she sipped from her cup, Pip studied her. It wasn't only her eyes that were striking. She carried herself with the strength and confidence of someone completely in control of her life.

He quickly averted his gaze as she surveyed him with a piercing stare. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small canister of tablets. "I found these in my car this morning," she said, tossing them to Pip. "Any reason why you took a canister of pills to the graveyard?"

Pip snatched them from the air and shoved them in his pocket. "That's none of your business."

Addy shook her head. "It wasn't... until you ran into me. Then it became my business. I'm not stupid, Pip. A man running through a graveyard in a storm with a pocket full of drugs can only mean one thing." She nodded to the photos of Pip and his wife. "Doesn't take a genius to put two and two together."

Pip didn't talk for a while. His mind was a mess, desperately trying to come up with an excuse. "I-I'm OK now. I was just having a rough day, that's all."

She raised her eyebrow. "Rough day? More like a rough couple of months. A rough day is being late for work or forgetting your lunch. People don't... take a canister of tablets after a rough day." She held her hand out. "So, I want you to give me the tablets."

Pip frowned. "N-no! Why didn't you just keep them if you didn't want me to have them?"

"Because it has to be your choice. Now, give me the tablets. Prove to me your rough months won't end with you taking them."

"I can't," Pip whispered.

Addy crossed her arms and leaned back in the chair. "Well then, it looks like you and I are going to get to know each other a great deal better. I'm not leaving you if there is the slimmest possibility of you having another 'bad day'. Come on, let's go and fetch your car." She stood up and looked at Pip expectantly. She didn't drop eye contact until he stood up and joined her.

Pip was numb and more than a little confused. The strange woman had crashed into his life and was refusing to leave it.

"Don't you have a job?" he asked as they climbed into her car, brand new and very expensive-looking.

"No, I don't need to work." Before Pip could ask more, she directed the topic back onto him. "What about you? Are you working?"

"No, not since... since Annie passed. We both worked in medical research and had enough saved that I won't have to work for a very long time."

Annie's face turned troubled. "So what do you do to pass the time?"

Pip stared out of the window. The rain from the previous night hadn't relented, it poured in a blurry sheet down the glass. "Nothing apart from waiting."

"Waiting until what?"

"Until I see Annie again."

When they reached the graveyard, Pip pointed out his car to Addy and she parked next to it. They stepped out into the lashing rain. Luckily, she had brought an umbrella along with her. It snapped open and she held it overhead. "Would you like to visit Annie's grave while we're here? By the way, why were you running last night? I forgot to ask."

Pip's heart jolted as the previous night returned with stunning force. He'd completely forgotten about the events leading up to colliding with Addy. "I thought I saw something that spooked me," he explained, not wanting to say more. "It was probably just the storm."

"Well, Halloween's not for a long time yet," she replied with a chuckle. "You lead the way, I'll focus on the umbrella."

Pip knew the way through the graveyard all too well, but it was the first time he'd been with someone else since the funeral. His friends and family had gathered around him and done everything in their power to support him but nothing they did could remove the shard of ice that had cleaved his heart in two. Annie was dead. His life was no longer worth living.

After weeks of fruitless effort, they accepted that he needed space to deal with her passing and had backed off. He loved them for their efforts but some wounds were never meant to heal.

Annie's grave was just as he remembered it. There was no sign of the shadow figure, nor was there a whisper of Annie's voice. He thought it most likely that he'd imagined the entire thing.

Her gravestone was made from a grey stone, so light that it appeared silver in the pouring rain. Her name was carved into it in gold, along with her birth and death dates. Beneath, it read:

A daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend. Loved by all, missed by just as many.

As always, Pip's broken heart beat pure misery around his body when looking at her grave. Her body might be only yards beneath the surface but her soul was further than the stars.

It wasn't until Addy's hand found his that he realised he was crying again. "I-I thought I heard her last night," Pip admitted. He didn't know why he was telling a stranger how he was losing his mind, but he was beyond caring. "She spoke to me before... you know."

Addy released his hand and moved in front of him. She lifted his chin with her fingers. She was much shorter than Pip, so she only had to move his head a little. "Our loved ones often speak to us when we need to hear them the most."

Pip stared into her gold-flecked eyes. "You don't think I'm crazy?"

"No, I think you're human. Next time you hear Annie's voice, speak to her."

*

Addy didn't leave Pip's house for the rest of the day. Much to Pip's annoyance and increasing confusion, she followed him on the drive home and didn't so much as ask before following him inside. Her confidence was unnerving. She didn't appear to feel uncomfortable in the slightest.

"So, what do you have planned for the rest of the day?" she asked, casually kicking off her shoes and tucking her feet beneath her on Pip's sofa.

"Make yourself comfortable," Pip said pointedly.

Addy flashed a wide grin. "I will, thank you. So, what's the plan, Lil Pip?"

Pip slumped on the sofa opposite. "Two things. First, who the fuck is Lil Pip? Second, why are you still here?"

"Lil Pip is

you -

I think it sounds cute. And I'm still here for the same reasons I told you this morning. Don't think you're getting rid of me after a few hours and a walk in the graveyard. From the sounds of it, you don't have anything on apart from waiting, and I certainly don't have anything on." She motioned to the room. "So, you have the pleasure of my company. What do you think about going out to eat? Or maybe we could catch a movie?"

Pip pointed to his swollen, red face. "I don't think going out to eat is an option."

Addy winced. "Sorry again. OK, how about take away and a movie here? My treat as an apology for spraying you."

Pip sighed in defeat. "I'm not going to be able to get rid of you, am I?"

"Nope!" Addy replied happily.

After a brief discussion, they decided on pizza. Pip grabbed some drinks from the kitchen while Addy picked out a film. It was the most that Pip had spoken to anyone since Annie's death and he found himself distracted by Addy's continual chatter. She acted as though they'd been friends for years and didn't seem to notice the haunted, morose mood that had followed Pip around for months.

The pizza came and Addy ate more than her fair share of it. Pip was impressed by how much she could put into such a small body. Addy noticed him looking at her and said, "Hey, don't judge! It's been a while since I had pizza so I'm making the most of it."

Pip watched her devour another piece. "I'm not judging. It's actually quite impressive how much you're able to eat, for someone so small."

Addy patted her very flat stomach proudly. "I like going on walks, it means I can eat as much as I want without feeling guilty."

"Walks?"

Addy nodded, her smile fading slightly. "Yes, walks. They get me out of the house and let my mind wander as my legs do the same." She looked meaningfully at Pip. "Sitting and staring at the same four walls isn't healthy for the mind or body."

Pip grunted and returned to his pizza.

When the film ended, Addy stretched and yawned. "I should be going. I'll be back tomorrow morning." She stood and held out her hand expectantly.

Pip eyed it. "What?"

"You know what."

His hand drifted to his pocket, where he suddenly felt the small canister of drugs pressing against his leg. "I-I'm going to keep them."

A small crease appeared between Addy's eyebrows. "If you keep them, can you promise me you'll be here in the morning? If you do anything, I'm going to carry around that guilt and pain for the rest of my life."

Pip's heart sank. He couldn't do that to her. Addy had effectively prevented him from doing anything by making his safety her responsibility. As much as he was hurting, he could never place the guilt of his death on another. He sighed and nodded. "I promise, I'll be here in the morning."

Addy stared deep into his eyes, the gold flecks in hers almost luminous against the green. "OK," she said softly, still holding his eyes with her own. "I'm trusting you, Pip." She waved and left the house, closing the door behind her.

Pip sagged into his sofa and rubbed at his eyes. Addy was a force of nature that had quite literally burst into his life and refused to leave it without any real explanation. Although they had spoken throughout the day, he didn't really know her. He resolved to rectify it the following day.

Groaning, he took the empty pizza boxes to the recycling and then made his way wearily upstairs, switching off the lights as he went. Without Addy distracting him, the pain and loneliness in his heart returned, worse than before.

He entered his shadow-cloaked bedroom, only lit by a thin ray of silver moonlight that shone through a gap in his curtains. He was about to close his bedroom door when an icy chill crawled up his spine with spidery fingers.

He froze and his chest tightened. In the corner of his bedroom was a deeper patch of darkness that took the form of a figure roughly the same height as him. His heart beat frantically and his breathing came in short rasps. He didn't know how he knew, but it was the same figure as the one in the graveyard... and it was staring right at him.

"W-who are you!?" Pip asked in a trembling voice. He reached out numbly for the light switch beside him, not daring to take his eyes off the figure.

It didn't respond.

His fingers brushed the switch and he flicked the lights on.

Blessed relief flushed through him as the figure disappeared. In its place was the corner of the room, completely empty. He sighed and shook his head, surprised to find himself sweating. He chuckled nervously. "I can add going crazy to the list of things going wrong in my life," he said as he entered his ensuite, giving the corner of the room a wide berth.

The bathroom had a walk-in shower, toilet, and double sinks that Annie had insisted on when they had refurbished the house. Pip went to his sink and slowly brushed his teeth, trying to avoid looking at Annie's sink. It was strange how something so simple as brushing teeth together each morning and evening could leave such a lasting impact. The ritual was once a cute and happy occasion. Since her death, it served as another reminder of his loss.

As he leant over to rinse his mouth, his trousers pressed into the side of the sink and he felt the canister. He took it out and looked at it, his mind filled with Annie. Oh, how he missed her. The pain pervaded every aspect of his being. It was mental. It was physical. It was spiritual.

Then, Annie's voice came to him as it had in the graveyard. An angelic whisper.

"Don't give up, Pip."

Pip dropped the canister into the sink in shock. "Annie!?" he gasped, lifting his head.

He looked into the mirror and shouted. Annie was standing at her usual spot beside him, smiling sadly at him through the mirror. Pip whipped his head to the side but he was alone in the bathroom. He returned to the mirror, where his Annie was still watching him. She was dressed in white and glowed faintly around the edges.

His voice was a strangled whisper. "Annie?"

"My dear, dear Pip,"

Annie sighed.

"Please, don't give up."

Pip was certain that he was losing his mind. The shadow figure and then Annie in the mirror were a testament to how badly he was falling apart. "I-I can't do it without you," he said, his eyes filling. "It was meant to be us forever! I-I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye!"

Annie looked at him with such sadness and compassion that Pip's knees trembled.

"I know,"

she replied sadly.

"But it was the way things were meant to happen. Don't be sad for what you lost, be happy for what we had. You still have a life to live ahead of you, don't spend it in misery. There is still life to be had after death."