As she runs her fingers through her slightly damp hair, she adjusts the volume on the radio and begins to sway to the music. Her heart is pounding as the music voices her every feeling;her elations, her pain, and her confusion. Hands trembling she pulls the corkscrew from the drawer and begins to open the chablis that tucks her into a lonely bed every night. She crosses the apartment and briefly gazes out the window at the city all lit up down below, then takes a deep breath while heading to the bedroom.
In all her envelopment in feelings she never even noticed he was there. He leaned against the door frame unseen; dressed in black pleated pants, a crisp white cotton shirt, and black long coat- he watched her in all her vulnerability. He had a wonderful view, the woman that he loved was standing not more than twelve inches in front of him and she didn't even know he was there. He watched as she laid across the bed and took a large mouthful of the wine, he also watched her throat move as she swallowed it. He'd seen as the tear formed in the corner of her eye, roll down her cheek, and land gently on the file laid open on the bed. How he wanted to catch that tear, take all of her sadness away. He reached out for her arm just as she stood to go to the bathroom, all he wanted to do is comfort her and tell her everything would be okay.
She quickly spun around at his touch. Her eyes scanning the room for movement, as she closed her robe tighter around her waist. Was it the chill in the room or did she know he was there? As she turned and continued to the bathroom, he crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed near where she had been laying. He lifted the wineglass to his nose and inhaled the perfumed mixture of the wine and her scent. He replaced the glass on the night table and glanced over the file; his picture, some poems she had written, a few of her more x-rated stories, and a ribbon tied bunch of letters he had never seen.
To the best I ever had,
My most visited regret is that I feel that I never properly let you know just how much you mean to me. You are my sunshine in the morning, the sweet dreams that make me want to sleep forever, and the only real friend I've ever had. If I were to take a deep breath most of what I breathe in is you. Every thing I write has a little bit of you in it; it more or less stems from me thinking about you. My heart is hungry for you all the time and its a feeling that will never be satisfied. This is what I have to feel, for the rest of my life. You know that I love you, right?
Yours,
Raven
To the best I ever had,
My rupturing heart tears at my blouse as it threatens to pound right out of my chest at the mere mention of your name. A glimpse of your face and I may very well need some form of revival, and although my physical form would be lifeless; my spirit would be soaring. To kiss those gentle, sweet lips is the only Heaven I could know here on Earth. My mind aches to think of new ways to link my life to yours; I miss you. By the way, you know that I love you, right?
Yours,
Raven
To the best I ever had,
I went out walking in the rain the other day just to try to get you out of my mind. The shower quickly turned into a down pour and I found myself running back to the apartment. As I turned the corner I thought I saw you cross the street, so naturally I went tearing after you. The rain started to cloud my vision and the tears were blinding me, so when I finally gained perspective I could no longer see you. Out of frustration I turned and headed back to the apartment. As I walked down the street oblivious to almost everything around me I realized that my relationship to you is like one of those watery puddles. I can peer into that liquid mirror see everything that I am and everywhere I want to be just blinking back at me but the second I reach out to touch it, the image distorts, changes form, and becomes unlike anything it was before. Damn the rain, damn the heavens for pouring it down on me and damn these feelings. I'm going to go take a nap now; I've come to believe I'm at my best when I'm sleeping, because that's when I'm with you. You know that I love you, right?
Yours,
Raven
To the best I ever had,
My breath is at a pause at the prospect of seeing you again. I almost drowned myself in the shower this morning while rinsing my hair, I was thinking about you so hard I forgot to inhale. It's like that a lot of the time, my mind keeps returning to days when everything was good and all I had to do is close my eyes to remember what love feels like. Now I'm starving for that feeling, the sustenance of emotion is non-existent when you're not here; the bed is cold and my mind is blank with feeling. I miss you eternally, and I'll wait for you longer than that. You know that I love you, right?
yours,
Raven
