"Her Ladyship will now hear matters of the utmost importance first," the scribe called out to the unusually crowded hall, "Please step forward, one at a time, and state your business clearly and slowly." As usual, nearly every child present ran forward to the scribe's desk, but most unusually, they sat down quietly in a row. "Uh... th-thank... thank you?" the scribe said, looking uncertainly at the well-behaved youngsters. Even Sir Hulgar was unnerved by their strange behavior, taking a step forward and resting his hand on his sword.
A hissing sigh puffed out the veil of the seated Lady Godgifu, as she stared over the heads of the children toward Sir Leofric who leaned quietly against the back wall, a beatific smile on his face. Her informal meetings with the public had become one of Leofric's favorite occasions to torment her, second only to their meetings in church when she was forced to nervously use her veil to shield others' views when he used his fingers to pantomime two lovers accidentally falling off horses into a variety of sexual positions and copulating. She wondered what perversions had he planned for her now, and when, in His wisdom and mercy, would God turn Leofric into a pillar of salt for involving the children?
Lilly, the smithy's daughter, was first in line and got right to the point, "Are you going to have a baby now?" she asked with the volume that only a child asking an indiscreet question could attain. A wave of gasps and tittering went through the crowd, as Lady Godgifu's head jerked up and looked accusingly in the direction of Sir Leofric who looked alarmed and raised his hands, shaking his head quickly.
"What... what makes you think I would have a baby, Lilly?" she asked, trying to make her voice as steady as possible.
"My cousin said that babies happen when a man and a woman do a special dance together and you and Sir Leofric danced at the Miller wedding, so are you going to have a baby now?" Lilly persisted. Nearby, Godgifu heard Sir Hulgar clear his throat. After drinking some mead at the Miller girl's wedding, she and Leofric had drawn a bit too much attention to themselves when the pipe and drum music had started up. Godgifu had awakened the next morning to another glare from Sir Hulgar. Perhaps his long lecture to her on the importance of propriety had left his throat parched.
"Well... ahem... Sir Leofric danced with a lot of women at the wedding--"
"That was just the carol, dance, though! When you danced with Sir Leofric it was special!"
"Honestly, sweetheart, dancing with Sir Leofric isn't all that special," Godgifu said, dismissively, "He's so tall he just stands there and sways. It's rather like dancing with a tree in a strong breeze." Sir Leofric closed his eyes and dramatically clapped his hand over his heart at the pain of her critique.
"But then he picked you up and twirled you in his arms! That was special!"
"That's just how they dance at court, now. Sir Leofric was showing me--"
"I was concerned for Her Ladyship's safety, Lilly. Her Ladyship's stature is rather dwarf-like and I feared we would lose her amidst the stamping feet," Sir Leofric offered, simultaneously.
"Then, why did you have your head under her veil?" Lilly asked, turning around to look at Sir Leofric.
"Oh, well now... um... that was..."
"No, Lilly," Godgifu cut in before Sir Leofric could make her situation worse. "To answer your question, no. I will not be having a baby, now. That was not the special baby-making dance that you saw at the wedding. I'm afraid we have to let the other children have their turns, now. I hope you had a good time at the wedding."
Lilly looked like she still had several more very loud questions to ask, but instead nodded, accepting that a turn was only a turn. She did not leave the hall though, as usual, but instead walked directly to Sir Leofric and held up her palm. Godgifu canted her head and snorted under her veils as Leofric began quietly arguing with the little girl who insistently kept her palm up. Leofric squatted next to her and continued their conversation face-to-face, gesturing several times toward Godgifu on the dais in frustration, when Lilly finally yelled "BUT YOU *SAID* TO ASK HER ABOUT DANCING!"
Muffled laughter filled the hall as Leofric grudgingly pulled a coin out of his pocket and put it in the little girl's hand. Lilly thanked him with a curtsey before going to sit with her mother. Leofric slowly stood again, his smile less beatific and far more uncertain as he looked at the remaining children in the line before Godgifu.
Next, sweet little Anna Morgan climbed the steps and sat next to Godgifu at the embroidery table. "If you get married again, will you still wear a veil and how do you do the special baby-making dance?" she asked. At that point, somewhere behind Godgifu's left eye, a terrible stabbing headache began.
On and on it went. Finally, having found a willing, or at least captive, adult to talk with them about topics normally forbidden to them, the children proceeded to cheerfully crucify Lady Godgifu with their questions. Her only consolation was seeing the progressive deterioration of Sir Leofric at the back of the room. This apparently hadn't been how his plan was intended to go.
Last in line was Frederic, the son of a farmer that raised wheat, barley, rye, sheep and pigs, a boy of seven years who had obviously spent each and every second of them thinking. "I think I want to marry Sara..." he said, as if he'd finally decided the matter after they'd had a long discussion about the topic.
"Oh really?" Lady Godgifu said with tired interest, wracking her brain to remember which Sara he could be thinking about. There were many girls named "Sara" in the village, but she could only ever remember Frederic talking about anything but his farm. "What is it about Sara that you think would make a good wife?" she asked.
"She's very smart... and I like that. She doesn't go and do all the silly things the others do. She likes to sit by me and we can just be quiet together," he said, thoughtfully.
"Well, that sounds like a very good start, Frederic. Do her parents like you? That's also very important. My late husband Wilfred made sure to talk with my father a lot before he asked to marry me," she said, noticing that Frederic's mother was beginning to look ill at ease.
"Sara's father died last year, Lady, but I'm very nice to her mum and I always make sure to help her across streams and show her to the best grass." At this, Leofric's shoulders slumped and Frederic's mother closed her eyes and shook her head.
"Oh... she's an ewe? Your Sara?"
"Yes, milady. Her mum, Cleo, is too. She's a widow, like you."
At that moment, Godgifu decided she was done figuring out everything for children and decided to let her cousin do some of the work, "Well, then I think the next order of business would be to talk with Reverend Palmer and see when he could fit your wedding into his schedule... oh dear, it would probably make him change his pew plan again. He won't like that. Are you sure this Sara is really the one for you? Couldn't you just be good friends? People keep a favorite pet... and sometimes a pet can be a closer friend than a human can be. Why marry?"
