I stepped back out onto the street, took about five steps, and opened the door leading to the upstairs apartments. I looked up to the top of the narrow, wooden steps, took a deep breath, and started up. I took two steps and hesitated--was I really willing to do it? It was likely to change our relationship dramatically, and I would have to face that reality. I found I couldn't resist the thoughts that compelled me to move forward after my brief hesitation.
With each step I took a small creak or squeak sounded as my weight settled onto the worn wooden steps--the sounds made me feel a little uneasy in the dim light of the single, bare bulb at the landing above me. My skirt swished, rubbing against my legs with each step, and the warm tingle between my legs that had urged me to come was evident. I knew others had tread this way before, but this was my second time, though in a way my first. His seduction had led me here, and I knew when I joined him I would be in his arms--then in all likelihood, his bed.
There were things that were mysterious about him--with what he seemed to be and what I observed. Things that didn't quite match. Our four dates had been wonderful and I was drawn to him despite the seeming inconsistencies of his job as a pizza delivery man with the words he used, and the way he behaved around women. I had two years of college and knew how an educated man spoke--it's not the same as a guy with a high school diploma, or a dropout who delivers pizzas. But, did it really matter right now?
I knew Clark, just as he knew me. He was a regular at the small bar that occupied the floor below his apartment. Over the past year he had joined my girlfriends and myself from time to time to share a drink as we watched a basketball, or football game on the large TV screen. He wasn't the most handsome man, not that he wasn't above average, but he came off like any other man when you looked at him. He was of medium build, with longish well-groomed hair, brown eyes, and by evening you could tell he had a heavy beard by the stubble on his face. He looked ruggedly handsome I had decided after a while.
He was friendly, flirty, and fun to be around. He didn't use foul language like many of the men we encountered in the bar--he wasn't shy around women either. In fact, he could say things to women, including me, that if spoken by any other man, would have gotten their faces slapped. It was his confident mannerisms that drew you in--he was a man, and you were a women--he knew the difference in a respectful, if naughty way.
When he put his arm around your shoulders it felt good to have his attention as he gave you a gentle hug. He looked at you and would whisper into your ear something completely innocuous. But, the other women at the table always took note--not knowing what he was sharing with you. It made you feel special in a way. It didn't seem to matter that he did the same thing with all of us women. Maybe that was why we all felt so comfortable with him--he was a wonderful tease.
Months earlier my girlfriend Maggie had broken up with her boyfriend the three weeks earlier and we were commiserating with her. After a few minutes Clark sat down next to her, put his arm around her shoulders, and pulled her close. She leaned onto him and rested her head on his shoulder--she had a smile on her face. I watched as he whispered into her ear. She took her head off his shoulder and looked at him--her smile wider as she nodded. Clark got up from his chair and told us he would be back in a little while. We turned our attention to the TV again. It was several minutes later when Maggie spoke softly into my ear.
"Katie, I'll be back in about half an hour. Don't worry, everything is fine."
I nodded my understanding and watched as she walked out the front door, then took a right turn disappearing from sight. I wondered why she had left--but since she said she was good I turned my attention back to the TV and our other friends. Good to her word, Maggie came and sat down in her chair next to me just over half an hour later.
I turned to look at her and was surprised as she sat next to me. She had a rosy glow to her face and a smile that expressed she was feeling good. If I hadn't known better I would have thought she had gotten laid. I shook it off--no way, where would she had gone to do that.
"Are you okay? You look flushed."
She put her hand to her face. "Shit."
"What does that mean?"
"It means it was every bit as good as I thought it was."
Just then the crowd in the bar went wild as the last shot on the basket went in--the game won by a single point. Maggie never answered my question, and I decided to let it pass. It really didn't matter, she was happier than I had seen her in a long while.
Clark walked in a few minutes later, and sat down next to Maggie. "What did I miss?"
"State just won the game by a foul shot in overtime," I replied excitedly.
"Shoot, I'd like to say I'm sorry I missed it...but well...I'm not exactly." As he placed his hand on Maggie's shoulder.
She looked up at him apologetically. "Sorry."
"Seeing the smile on your face says you aren't"
She laughed, "No, I'm not."
The next two times we went to the bar Maggie and Clark disappeared for about half an hour. The third time it happened I finally figured out it wasn't by coincidence. When I asked Maggie about it later she told me Clark had offered to take care of her for a while if she wanted him to.
"Katie, he knows how to take care of a woman. He doesn't pretend he loves you, he tells you he understands you need attention and affection. It's the best decision I've made in a while that's actually made me happy. I know it's just sex, but it's enough for now."
Her response shocked me at the time. Not only because she had had sex with him, but that even after she started dating again they remained as friendly as before. Even when her new boyfriend joined us on a regular basis later they remained friendly. I didn't pass judgement. She was an adult, and I wasn't her mother. I realized it had worked for her at the time, and she had been the better for it. Of course, it was something I thought I would never do myself. Now, as I took another step closer to the landing, I knew I was wrong. After four dates I was ready to give myself to him lock, stock, and barrel.
I had broken up with my boyfriend of five months three weeks earlier before Clark asked me out. I told him no the first time--then the second. He took the refusals well, and it didn't seem to affect the way he treated me--we joked and spent time together at the bar every Thursday night same as before. He would whisper suggestive things into my ear, and I would look at him as if I was annoyed. Then he would put this impish grin on his face and I would burst out laughing--I couldn't help it.
One time while we sat together watching a football game he looked at me with a smile. I knew he was going to say something to get a rise out of me, and I leaned over so he could whisper into my ear.
"You know, if you ever pull your panties down, and let me in you're never going to want another man in your life."
I looked at him and laughed. "You're never going to see my panties. So, there!"
"Bet you I know what color the panties are you're wearing."
"No way. You can't know that," I replied confidently.
"They're pink with a small blue flower pattern."
My eyes went wide, "Clark!"