Its Not A Date

This is a late chapter in a romance story I'm writing, but I've started near the end so it's pretty much all I've got that's currently publishable. I will almost certainly be reuploading at some point, so apologies.

The first half is mostly romance and set up, it's a somewhat slow burner. If you're just here for sex, skip to the cinema...

CONTEXT: Emma was content with her life, her job, and her boyfriend. That was until Kane came into her life. A new teacher at the school she also teaches at, her chemistry with Kane made her realise that her life has been grey, colourless, dull up to this point. Whenever she's with Kane, the colours of her world burn brightly.

After a nearly moment a few days earlier, Emma has made a decision: she will spend some alone time with Kane to see if life COULD be better with him than with her current boyfriend, Dean. They decided dinner and a film would be a good idea. They'll be in public, so nothing untoward will happen, right?

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As it turned out, Kane was waiting at the bus stop for Emma, umbrella in hand.

"It's not far from here, don't worry", he said with his usual smile, opening it to shelter Emma from the weather. He pulled her in with one strong arm, part hug, part getting her out of the rain. She lingered with her head on his chest for a second. Time slowed as she took stock of her senses. The beating of his heart next to her ear. The smell of his aftershave, strong on his neck. The warmth of his embrace with the spark flowing through her from the thumb brushing the skin of her arm. Damn it, she thought, maybe I should've gone for the long sleeves. Emma felt his head move slightly and she wondered if he was considering kissing her forehead. She pulled her head deeper into his chest, just in case. She wanted to hold onto the lapel of his jacket all evening, but knew she had to let go eventually.

They parted, and Kane held the umbrella over Emma's head.

"Don't want to get your hair wet, I can tell you've put time into it. It really suits you."

Emma smiled at her shoes and brushed her hair over her ear. Her hand lingered on the back of her neck for a moment longer until she was sure he wasn't looking at her anymore. She looked back up at him as he scanned the pavement ahead of them. His hair always looks nice, she thought to herself, I'm not quite sure how he does it.

"I haven't seen the woman on tonight before but she should be good. They always are at La Melodia D'Oro. I had a quick look before I got to you, she's just got a guitar but I think I saw a loop pedal so he should be good."

"Well I've always liked K.T. Turnstall so I like the sound of it"

"Well Suddenly I See we are going to have a good night then"

"...that's such a dumb fucking joke," Emma said, looking away so Kane couldn't see her laughing. She also though his smirk at his own joke was so fucking dumb, but she couldn't help but smile even more because of it.

"Are you going to have a pun for every singer we talk about tonight?"

"Quite possibly. Unless we talk about The Beatles, then I might need some Help!"

Emma considered pushing Kane into the road for that one, but he looked so pleased with himself, it was quite cute. She bit her lip to stop herself beaming.

"You're going to hate me by the end of the night aren't you?" Kane smiled.

Oh quite the opposite unfortunately, she thought to herself.

"Oh I already hate you, don't worry. I believe the next step is despising?"

"Oh, ouch!" Kane responded, faking outrage. "But as an English teacher, you're not wrong. Loathe maybe?"

"Mm, nope: I will positively deplore you."

"Ooft, I am feeling very deplored already."

"Oh just you wait until I am fully deploring you. You have never been deplored like it. You will be begging for me to stop."

"If you want me to beg, I will be down on my knees for you", Kane said, laughing to himself.

Emma tried to stop herself from laughing, but when she saw his face she let herself laugh. His genuine smile and laughter told her that any innuendo she could read into that was accidental. It was refreshing. Though when their eyes met again there was a twinkle in his that told her he knew what he said, and meant it too.

"You don't have to get down on your knees for me," she responded.

"Yet", she finished, in her head as she turned to press the button at the road crossing. As she turned back around she saw Kane's face and realised she may have accidentally said it outloud.

"Are you sure you're okay with me hogging the umbrella?" She said, trying to change the subject to more wholesome, platonic realms.

"Of course! It's barely raining anyway" Kane replied with drops running down his face. Somehow, wetting it made his hair look even more perfect to Emma.

"Are you sure? Because there's room under here for two."

"I don't want that dress getting rained on. Besides, we're nearly here now anyway, it's just over there" he said, pointing at a fairly nondescript door. He was right, she wouldn't have thought to go in if he hadn't pointed it out.

She made sure to walk slightly quickly to the door to keep him slightly more protected from the weather. He reached the door first and opened it for her. She thanked him and entered as he closed the umbrella. She felt his hand on the small of her back, guiding her inside. His fingers stroked her back slightly as he removed it to take off his jacket. She wished it had stayed a little longer. She wished it even more when she realised that taking off his jacket revealed his white shirt was slightly wet. She wished it even more when she realised that that wasn't the only thing that was slightly wet.

She was starting to realise this was probably a bad idea.

The hostess smiled at them as she guided them to their table and handed them their menus. Kane smiled back at her. It relieved Emma slightly to see that his smile was that warm and genuine to everyone, though it tugged on her gut slightly that it wasn't reserved solely for her. The hostess lit the candle in the middle of the table and informed them that the music would be starting in about ten minutes.

"So, are you thinking wine?" Asked Kane, "You said you liked Italian reds, I think this place has some good ones."

"My Italian uncle regularly tells me off for my regular choice of 'whichever red is on Clubcard prices this week' so he's given me some nice ones before, I think I saw one of them on the menu."

"Awesome, I was going for steak anyway so I'll get a bottle for us both."

"You don't have to", Emma tried saying, though enjoying that it wasn't posited as an offer or question.

"I know, but it's easier than me giving you my bank details and working out how much money to send and all that jazz. You can get the popcorn later if you really want to."

Kane looked down at the menu as Emma looked around the restaurant. It somehow had a homely feel while still feeling like somewhere cool. It felt like if the lights were on a bit brighter and there were some sofas, it would make the sort of coffee shop a budding young writer would spend hours in trying to find their muse. The fireplace and plants gave it a welcoming feel, while the impressionist art on the wall made it seem slightly more upmarket. The denim jacket-wearing woman in the corner setting up her guitars and mic just completed the look.

Their table felt very secluded. Behind Emma was a large plant and then the doors to the kitchen, nobody was sat on the table next to them, and behind Kane was a group of women with enough cocktails to keep them occupied all night. They were as alone as you could be in a public restaurant. Emma was glad they had already bought their cinema tickets because she imagined as the night wore on, the candles and extensive wine collection would make this place feel very intimate.

A waiter came over and gave them a jug of water and collected their food and drink orders. Emma decided a light pasta dish would be good, filling enough but not something that usually makes her feel too full or tired. She knew how much she was going to overthink the rest of the night anyway, she didn't need the added discomfort of food. Some light chit-chat later and the waiter was back with the bottle of wine. He gave it to Kane to taste, then poured them both a glass.

"I always feel so awkward when they ask me to taste it, what am I supposed to say?" Kane whispered as soon as the waiter was out of earshot. "I see them sniff it and swill it about on TV so I just do that too and then make a face that makes them think I know what I'm talking about"

"Ah I thought I recognised that face, it's the same one I made when I teach my year 9s about fucking glacier formation. I've never understood that."

"I will happily drink to that! To not understanding half of what we teach our students" he said, raising a glass. Emma clinked his glass and they both took a sip. Neither of them broke eye contact as they did so until their smiles made them both look away.

"I wouldn't have thought you don't know what you're talking about when you teach though. I've seen you teach" she said "That lesson I overheard. You seem so passionate about it, and that flows into the kids too. I've never seen a group of year 10 lads so actively engaged in poetry."

"What's not to love about poetry? They think they don't like poetry because it's too difficult to understand or because it's too flowery or because it's inaccessible, but it is..." he paused, looking the for words. He sighed slightly "I wish I could express myself as accurately as those poets do. Because feelings can't be easily explained by single words or phrases. The important feelings, they need something deeper, more meaningful. I've never been able to connect with my own feelings in a more real way than I have from reading poems."

"Do you have a favourite?"

He chuckled slightly "I'd be a pretty crap English teacher if I didn't, wouldn't I? But, then again, my favourite poem was introduced to me by those incredibly high-society fellows known as the Arctic Monkeys. One of their songs, one of my favourites, I Wanna Be Yours, gets its lyrics from a John Cooper Clarke poem."

"Oh I love that song! I didn't know it was a poem originally."

"A pretty great one too, the Monkeys changed the lyrics slightly. The music and the way he sings works really well, but I prefer it as a poem. When you read a poem you can get across the feelings from each individual word a bit more and play with the emphasis and rhythm."

"What do you mean?" Emma asked. She knew she was playing with fire.

Kane smiled slightly and adjusted his collar. He opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, obviously thinking about whether to show her or not. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a moment, then looked up and deep into Emma's eyes.

"I wanna be your vacuum cleaner

Breathing in your dust

I wanna be your Ford Cortina

I will never rust

If you like your coffee hot

Let me be your coffee pot

You call the shots

I wanna be yours"

Emma held Kane's eye contact, unable to think about anything other than the words leaving his mouth. The way he nodded his head at her ever so slightly when he said 'you' nearly made her look away, but the final line set a fire in her she didn't recognise.

"I wanna be your raincoat

For those frequent rainy days

I wanna be your dreamboat

When you want to sail away

Let me be your teddy bear

Take me with you anywhere

I don't care" - he paused, and looked almost pleadingly at her. She could feel her lip tremble.

"I wanna be yours", he almost whispered, as they leaned in closer to each other.

"I wanna be your electric meter

I will not run out

I wanna be the electric heater

You'll get cold without

I wanna be your setting lotion" - he broke his eye contact here for the first time, his eyes getting lost in her hair. His hand made small movements like he was miming stroking her hair; Emma wasn't sure if he even knew he was doing it.

"Hold your hair in deep devotion

Deep as the deep Atlantic ocean" - he snapped back to look her dead in the eyes for the final line.

"That's how deep is my devotion. I wanna be yours" - he looked down at her lips - "I wanna be yours" - he looked back up into her eyes, drawing even closer to her - "I wanna be yours".

They stayed where they were for a moment. Their faces were a few feet apart, but all Emma could hear was his breathing. She was deaf to the world around them. No amount of cocktail gossip from the next table could distract her. The movement of waiters and people walking around her weren't visible to her. His eyes. His lips. The rapid beating of her own heart. The hot feeling in her cheeks, her heart, her stomach, and further down. Nothing else mattered. No work, no bills, no world conflicts, no global crises; no boyfriend. All she wanted was those lips of his on hers. She looked at them, and was very aware he was looking at hers too. They inched closer. Their hands inched closer. Those hands. She wondered what they'd feel like on her. She wondered what they'd feel like in her. Every small touch had felt electric. She wanted those hands to run through her hair as he pulls her closer. She wanted those hands to cup her face as he kisses her. She wanted those hands to lightly stroke down her back, then back up release the zip. She wanted those hands to slip the fabric from her shoulders and his lips to follow, down her neck, across her clavicle, and down her arm as her dress gets removed. She wanted those hands to run up from her waist, his thumbs tracing under her bra, stroking upwards, and lightly stroking her nipples through the fabric. She wants those hands to travel round to her back to remove her bra as his lips move to the side of her face. She wanted to feel his warm breath on her ear as he whispered those words to her, and only her.

"I wanna be yours".

A loud crackling noise from the speakers broke her out of the moment. She jumped slightly at the shock, and realised Kane did too. They both laughed with each other, then looked towards the stage where the woman was ready to perform. She introduced herself to polite applause from the restaurant. The women on the table next to them cheered and whooped. The world had returned to its usual volume, as had Emma's brain. What were those feelings she had just felt? She'd tried to think if she'd felt anything like that with [boyfriend] at any point in the last 4 years. She must have done, right? She tried to think, as the guitar started playing its first song. No, she'd never felt any of those feelings before. And she wanted to feel them again.

They sat in silence, enjoying the first song. She said she was going to start with some more chill songs to ease everyone into it, so everyone can enjoy their meals with conversation. Emma had to turn her neck around to see the singer properly but she figured it was probably the safest way to be until she cooled down. She couldn't quite see, but Kane seemed to follow suit. As the singer finished her rendition of David Gray's Babylon, Emma thought it was probably safe to turn around again.

"I like the atmosphere. I thought it would be weird being sort of half ambient music, half performance, but it really works." Emma said, flowing back into conversation with him as naturally as always.

"Right? I think it's because it's not the sort of place people go by accident so everyone here buys into it if that makes sense?"

Just as the performer started playing Tracey Chapman's Fast Car, their food arrived. As much as the singer had said she wanted people to still talk during the show, most eyes and ears were firmly fixed on her. The harmonies she added with her loop pedal and the variety of sounds she got out of the guitar were mesmerising to Emma. She kept turning to watch, so she took her time to eat her meal. At the end of the next song, Emma turned around, and saw Kane was nearly done.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, you took me to this place and bought us the wine and I've basically ignored you since the music started! How is the food? Are you liking the music too?"

Kane just smiled, warmly.

"Seeing your face as you fall in love with each song...", he started. Emma tried not to complete the sentence in her head. "It's why I love this place so much. I'm just happy to share it with someone."

Emma smiled as she tucked into her dinner. The food was, as advertised, delicious, and the wine had paired brilliantly with it. She was just finishing her dish when the singer started playing Everywhere by Fleetwood Mac. This was clearly a favourite of many in the restaurant, as she saw heads turn across the room to watch. A few were even singing along. Those who weren't paying attention had their minds changed by some beautiful harmonies in the second chorus. The beauty of a loop pedal is that some of the sounds the singer records don't make sense on their own, but when they all come together, it makes something almost magical. By the end of the song, all eyes were on the singer. As Emma lost herself in the music, she started swaying. She turned her head slightly to see that not all eyes were on the singer. One pair of eyes were on her. Kane was sitting back, smiling at Emma. The same devotion was in his eyes as it had been when he'd recited the poem to her. He smiled as he mouthed along with the singer as she finished her song: "I want to be with you everywhere". The whole restaurant clapped and cheered but Emma and Kane looked at only each other, oblivious to anything else happening around them.

The waiter had to clear his throat as he took their plates away for them to even notice him.

"Hi, sorry, do you want to look at the dessert menu?"

Emma and Kane looked at each other as two people in a restaurant often do when confronted with the same question. The tension was broken by Emma looking at her phone to see the time. Her heart dropped. A notification from instagram that [boyfriend] had sent her a reel. It was probably something silly and unimportant, but it showed he was thinking of her. She couldn't believe she was here, having these feelings for someone else, while she had a boyfriend who may not be perfect, but cared about her so much. She tapped on her phone screen, thinking about everything that had happened so far that night.

"Actually, we have a film we should be getting to, can we just have the bill please?" asked Kane.

The waiter left. Emma couldn't even look up at Kane.

"Are you okay?", he asked. Emma hated how concerned he sounded.

She took a breath to compose herself and tapped on the screen a few more times. She opened the message. "If we get cats, we're doing this!" was the accompanying message from [boyfriend] to the reel of two cats sitting in cardboard tanks on top of those robot vacuum cleaners. Emma laughed to herself.

"Sorry, funny cat video", she said, not looking up at Kane. She knew she needed to scroll through Instagram for a few seconds before looking back at him, or she'll be overwhelmed by thoughts she didn't want to have. After a few funny reels and one about some terrible thing happening in the world, she put her phone away and looked back at Kane. He hadn't taken his eyes off her. She went to apologise but realised there was no anger or annoyance or disappointment in his face. Just kindness, care, concern, compassion, and...no, she mustn't add that last word on.

The waiter came with their bill. Emma insisted on paying for her own meal, but did relent and let Kane pay for the wine. She promised she would buy the popcorn at the cinema which, considering cinema prices, would probably nearly match the price. When they left, it was still raining. Kane put up the umbrella again and held it above Emma's head. The rain was heavier than before, but the cinema wasn't far so Kane again insisted that she be under the umbrella. He chatted away while she tried to get all images of Ryan Gosling in The Notebook out of her mind. As they entered the cinema, he again held the door open for her, and she patted his jacket as a thank you.