The butterflies in her stomach fluttered and her palms sweated as she thought about what could happen. She let him know she could be there after dinner and told her parents she was going to Kristen's so there would be no suspicion if they saw her car there later.
She showered and got dressed in her leggings and an oversized tee just like she wore 90% of the time she hung out with her best friend. She got in her little silver Nissan Sentra and tried to focus on the music coming from her speakers and not think about the fact that she was about to continue down the dangerous road she started on that afternoon.
When she got there she did as he instructed and walked in without knocking.
"Hey! Come on back to the kitchen."
She grinned at the familiar sound of his voice, like this was just another day of her dropping in and waiting for Kristen to come out. But then she thought about the fact that her friend would be completely beside herself if she were to find out why Heather was here.
She poked her head around the corner of the fridge as she entered his space. "Hey."
"Hey." He turned and gave her a thousand-watt smile that made her spine tingle. "I was just cleaning up in here."
Slamming the dishwasher shut, he hit a couple of buttons and the machine whooshed to life. "C'mon let's go sit at the table."
The table. She let out a breathe she didn't realize she was holding. Of course he would have thought of the most perfect, least threatening place in the house to have this conversation. They would have space between them to allow them to talk without things getting out of hand. She tried not to think about what "getting out of hand" with him meant.
He took a spot facing the garage door and she pulled out the chair across from him. When she sat down his hands reached across the table to take hers. Up until that moment, she had been partially afraid that the events at the golf course had only happened in her head. He took both of her hands in one of his and put his other on top, rubbing her knuckles with his thumb.
She looked up from their hands and into his eyes. This was very real.
"Hi," he said, and the absurd simplicity of the greeting made her laugh.
"Hi."
"So, I've been thinking about what you told me earlier today."
She subconsciously tried to pull her hands away, readying herself for rejection. But he refused to let her go.
"Just listen." His blue eyes seemed to darken as he all but begged her. "I've known you since you were born, Heather. You are a beautiful young woman with a brilliant future in front of you.You will literally be turning away guys right and left this fall when you start at ASU and I am beyond flattered to have your affections."
She closed her eyes and dropped her chin to her chest, waiting for the "but" that she knew was coming.
"Look at me, Heather," he requested and gently squeezed her fingers. "Please."
She did as he asked and she watched his face grow solemn as he chose his words. "Your dad and your mom are my best friends in the world. And Kristen—my daughter— is your best friend. The last thing I would ever want to do is hurt them."
She nodded in agreement and felt her emotions rising. "I get that. That's why this has been so confusing for me."
Heather moved her hands so that now his were inside hers and she mimicked the way he had been caressing them. She looked him in the eye again to try and stress how serious she was about what she was going to say next. "This is so embarrassing for me to admit, but, uh, when I started feeling this way...at Christmas...I tried to stop it. I tried to make sense of it. You're a handsome guy and we happen to spend a lot of time together. Surely, this was just a 'weird crush'"she said, rolling her eyes for dramatic effect."
He gave her another big smile and chuckled.
"I have a boyfriend who cares about me a lot and I tried to focus on that. I want to be in love with him like any normal girl would be. I tried so hard that last night...". She bit her lip as she thought about the way Dallas had made her physically feel in that study. And that, despite all that, all she had wished was to be pressed beneath Henry's body, looking into his eyes. The same ones that were watching her intensely right at that moment.
"Can you tell me what happened last night?"
She took a deep breath.
"I tried to forget about any feelings I had for you in the only way I knew how." She blinked and wiped away a tear that rolled down her cheek, not trusting herself to be able to explain any further without having a complete breakdown.
"I know it's not my place—"
"I couldn't go through with it, okay?" she interrupted before he could go any further.
"I'm sorry, I was just worried after seeing you like that. I thought maybe..." he paused and rubbed her forearm soothingly. "I don't know what I thought. I'm just sorry you didn't get to enjoy your prom."
She nodded and took a second to compose herself. "I know how just," she searched for the right word, "insane it is for me to feel this way about you."
"It's not insane—," he interjected and she laughed bitterly. "It's not, Heather. You are entitled to your feelings. It would be 'insane' if I didn't feel flattered that you feel this way about me."
"Please don't patronize me."
"I'm not." He leaned forward to emphasize his point. "I haven't been in a romantic relationship...hell, I haven't even felt an attraction to anyone since Evelyn passed. But kissing you today..."
He regripped her hand, squeezing it as he closed his eyes in remembrance of their moment in the woods. The butterflies in her stomach returned as he opened them again, his navy blue eyes boring into hers.
"Kissing you did not feel wrong."
She grinned shyly at his confession and replied, "It was the first thing that has felt right in a long time."
"I'm 56 years old, Heather. Your dad would literally kill me...or any man our age, to be honest, if he knew they were sleazy enough to be dating a high school student."
"You're not sleazy...but I know what you mean. And Kristen would never speak to me again, if she knew how I felt about you."
He nodded silently.
"But I'm 18 years old and graduating...and moving out of my parents home," she reminded him, "in just a few months."
"And Dallas?"
She shook her head. "Dallas was the only thing I had to try and keep me normal as long as possible. I wanted so much to make it work with him...but it didn't. You kept showing up," she said, her voice strained as she tried to stress how intense her feelings were. "You are so much fun to be around. And you're...cute."
He raised his eyebrows in disbelief, blushing as he smiled. "Cute,"he repeated.
"Yes, very cute...Henry." She used his first name to remind him that he was the one who instructed her to call him that since she was an adult now. "The way I feel about you is overwhelming. I've never been in love with someone before so I don't even know if that's what I am. I just know that I want to be with you when we're apart. I look forward to seeing you and obviously the idea of being with you physically...," she paused and laced her fingers through his. "It is something I think about a lot more than I probably should."
"Jesus, Heather." He closed his eyes. "You are killing me right now."
