Ice Storm

The clatter of sleet beating against the window made Paula shiver even though her house was warm and cozy. Her grandson, Michael, was asleep in his crib. After she settled into bed with a good book, her lights started flickering and then went out. She called her neighbor, Jane, to ask about the power outage. Jane's power was still okay so she invited Paula to come next door.

Michael was crying when Paula carried him in the front door. Jane's husband, Walt, was staring at the TV and called out, "Jane, Ronnie is crying." Walt's voice made Michael cry even louder, but Walt did not notice.

"Bring Michael in here," Jane directed Paula to a quieter room where she might be able to get him back to sleep. Walt returned to his TV stupor.

Paula laid Michael on the sofa and Jane whispered, "How about a glass of wine?" Paula nodded. Jane left and came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses. Paula calmly watched Jane pour the wine, took her glass, and sipped.

"Nice," she smiled. Jane sat down next to Paula on the sofa. While Jane was sipping her wine, Paula began to speak.

"Have you ever wondered why we're here?" She asked. Jane did not answer. "I do, all the time," she continued. Michael found her voice soothing and stopped crying. "I mean – this little guy, why is he here? Why are

you

here......Why am

I

?" She trailed off.

"I used to wonder why I was here," Jane said. "Then I convinced myself it was a meaningless question. As I've gotten older, it does come back now and then."

"What if you found out you were not here for some grandiose task like saving the world? What if you were here only to take out the garbage, or change a tire, or because a friend needed you, or maybe just to smell the roses? Would you felt cheated?"

"I wouldn't feel cheated. I'd be relieved." Jane's answer surprised Paula.

"Really? Why?"

"Because saving the world is so hard. I could do that other stuff you mentioned," Jane smiled.

They sipped the wine and it was warming them up. They were quiet for a while, lost in their own thoughts.

"For a long time I thought I was here to something

special

, but I could never figure out what it was," Paula said. "Now that I'm older, I think maybe I

already

did it; and I

still

don't know what it was. Isn't that weird? "

"I think I understand where you're coming from. Most of life is mundane and boring, and some of it is downright painful; it seems natural to ask

does my suffering have any purpose?

" Jane said. Paula nodded in agreement. They fell silent for a few moments.

Then Jane asked, "Have you noticed how our lives are very similar?"

"What do you mean?"

"You have an actual child to take care of," she said. Paula's daughter, Laura, left her abusive husband and moved in with Michael, her one year old son. A week later, Laura ran away, but left Michael behind. Paula became a Mom again at 40. She tried to recall all the care and attention infants needed. Jane was helping her cope.

"And I have what amounts to a child, too," Jane continued. A disastrous car accident left her husband, Walt, with amnesia. He had only vague memories of his life before the crash. He and Jane had been a happy, intimate couple, but now she was just a woman who cared for him. Their son Ronnie was away at college and had no idea what his mother was going through. Jane saw herself as a lonely 50-year old widow.

"Meanwhile......" Jane grew quiet.

"Meanwhile... what?" Paula urged her to continue.

"I feel lonelier and sadder every day." It was the first time she said it out loud and she was about to cry.

"I do too, but I couldn't admit it until now." Paula sighed as if she suddenly recognized how weighty her life was.

Jane sighed. "You're the only person who listens to me, who understands me, the only person who cares about me."

Paula smiled. "It's been tough for you, I know." Jane started to cry. Paula cradled her, trying to encourage Jane to cry out all the hurt she had endured since Walt's disastrous accident. She stroked Jane's shoulders, and then touched her neck and her earlobes, and then gently drew her closer.

Jane cried softly as the freezing rain beat on the windows. Paula held her and dozed off. When Jane realized Paula was asleep, she reached for a nearby blanket. She covered the baby, and pulled the blanket around them which woke up Paula.

"Let's go upstairs where it's warmer," Jane whispered, "The baby can sleep on the guest bed."

"What about Walt?"

"He's OK. He puts himself to bed every night."

Jane slowly got up, and helped Paula to her feet. She picked Michael up without waking him and followed Jane upstairs. They entered Jane's bedroom and she sleepily the baby on the spare bed and blocked him in with some pillows. Then they removed their outer clothing, crawled beneath the large comforter, and fell asleep.

Jane awoke several hours later. The bedroom was quiet and peaceful. The freezing rain had stopped. Paula was lying on her left side, with her back to Jane. She liked feeling Paula's presence. It reminded her of when she slept beside Walt. She always felt a surge of joyfulness as she lay there. Of all places in the Universe where she

could

be, that was the only place she

wanted

to be. She now felt that same sense of peace with Paula.

She reached out and felt the warmth of Paula's body beneath her t-shirt. She gently touched the back of Paula's neck. Her skin was soft and smooth. Jane quickly discovered she

liked

touching Paula.

Then she realized how long it had been since anyone had touched

her

and she wished Paula would awaken. She moved her fingers to touch Paula's hair. It was lovely and soft. Then she eased herself closer and put her arm around Paula, who sighed in her sleep. Jane touched Paula's breast, through the cloth. She immediately recalled how Walt used to fondle her; it seemed like that was a million years ago.

She moved her hand down to Paula's belly, which was gently rising and falling with her breath. Jane felt intensely alive. She moved her hand further downward, between Paula's legs, and then rested her hand on Paula's crotch and fell back to sleep.

When Jane awoke Paula and the baby were gone. She found them in the kitchen. Paula was at the sink. Jane came over and touched her back with the palm of her hand. Paula almost dropped a dish she was cleaning. She smiled then whispered, "That was nice, last night. It felt good."

"You were awake? You felt me touching you?" Jane said.

"Yes, but I didn't want you to know. I thought you might stop touching me."

"So it was OK?"

"Well, if you had asked me, I would probably have said no, but your touch awoke feelings I almost forgot I ever had. My mind might have said no, but my body sure said yes."

"You have lovely smooth warm skin," Jane said.

"And you have a soft, gentle touch."

"I was hoping you would wake up and respond. It wasn't until then that I realized how long it has been since anyone has touched me like that. I really need it," Jane started crying.

"It's all right," Paula tried to soothe Jane.

"No, it's not." Jane said, quietly.

"What do you mean?" Paula asked.

"Well, I could date a man just to have sex, but I want something

more

than sex," Jane said.

There was a long silence. Finally Paula whispered, "So do I." She paused, wondering if she should go on. "I have an idea. Why don't we date

each other

? We've gotten along well since the day we met, and now we know we have the same needs."

"But how will we know what to

do

?" Jane asked.

"How hard can it be? Men are mostly clueless but somehow

they

figure it out. We won't have a problem," Paula said, happy that Jane had agreed. "Let's make a date. I'll come over and cook a nice dinner and put Michael to bed early. Then we'll cuddle, and see what happens next."

"Sound's perfect!" Jane said.

Paula smiled. "I have a feeling it will be."

THE END