Home for the Holidays

Nicky's hand was resting on my shoulder and he gave me a squeeze. "Come on," he said. "Let's show them how little what happened means to you and meet them at the front door."

I rested my hand on his, staring into his sparkling blue eyes with gratitude.

"Thanks, Nicky. I couldn't do this without you."

He gave me a huge grin, bending and sliding his lips over mine. I heard Mara sigh as I reached around his back and under his coat, hanging on to him.

"For luck," he whispered when he lifted his head. I saw him wink at Mara and could have kissed him again when he held out his hand to her, taking mine in the other. "You don't want to miss the fireworks, do you?" he said to Mara.

"Are you crazy? I've been looking forward to Kenna giving perfect Miss Bekka hell since I found out they were both coming for Christmas."

"Mara!"

"Don't use that Mom tone of voice on me, Kenna. You and I both know that Bekka's been given everything she's wanted since she was born. If she can't get it given to her, she schemes and plots until she gets it. She wanted Steven because you had him. She was pissed because you were getting married before her. So she went and seduced him because she knew you wanted him."

"Wait, she seduced him? How do you know this?"

"I read her diary, how the hell else do you think I find out things around here."

"Mara, you... you never read mine, did you?"

Mara grinned at me and I felt suddenly very exposed. "Oh, yeah. Page 117 was very... uh... interesting."

Nicky grinned. "What was on page 117?" he asked my sneaky little sibling.

"I'd never betray my sister," Mara said, though I saw her wink at him and suddenly knew that all my inner secrets were going to be Nicky's before this trip were through.

"You'd better not, squirt," I said, narrowing my eyes at her.

We rounded the corner of the wraparound porch and saw Riley with his paws braced up against Steven's side of the car, growling menacingly.

"Oh, did I forget to tell you? Your dog took a bite out of Steven the last time he and Bekka came for dinner."

"I always heard that dogs have a wonderful people sense," Nicky murmured close to my ear.

"Ha ha, funny." I let out a piercing whistle and Riley got down, bouncing toward me with deviltry in his doggie eyes. "Behave yourself," I told him and then ruined it by ruffling up his sides. "Why didn't Bekka call him off?"

"She can't get out of the car by herself," Mara said with a laugh. "Skinny Bekka is now a beached whale."

I saw Steven get out and waited for the usual feelings of hurt and betrayal to slam into my stomach like a brick fist. It took me a second to realize they weren't there. As I looked at him, I suddenly wondered what had made him seem so wonderful in the first place. . It wasn't as if he was ugly, but now when I looked at him his dark hair seemed a bit fake, as if he dyed it. His mustache was starting to turn gray and his eyes were really close together and a beady brown. He glanced at me and I couldn't help but wonder what he was seeing.

Then I took the first step, walking off the porch and down the driveway. I could hear Mara and Nicky behind me and knew by their silence that they were relishing what they thought was coming up.

Steven had opened Bekka's door and was reaching in. I saw him brace himself and then heard Bekka's high pitched yelp. "Dammit, Steven, can't you do anything right?"

It was as if a ray of sunshine had broken through a cloud. Suddenly, I was very happy for the two of them. They deserved each other. Sneaky, cheating Steven would never be truly faithful to any woman, which Bekka should have realized when he was so easily seduced into her bed.

Bekka? Well, she was no prize when she wasn't pregnant. With jumping hormones and Bekka's profound fear of getting fat, she had to be an absolute joy to live with now. That thought brought a smile to my lips and I was able to greet them both with no animosity what-so-ever, much to Mara's dismay.

"Merry Christmas, Steven. Do you need some help? I think I can get Dad's John Deere out of the barn and put the hoist strap on it." Okay, so maybe there was just a little bit of animosity.

"Kenna!" I heard Bekka's voice and brushed past Steven to get the first look at my beautiful sister since she'd broken into my wedding waving one of those pregnancy test wands. Mara hadn't been exaggerating. Bekka looked as if she were carrying twins at least and her face showed the weight she'd put on. She didn't glow like so many pregnant women did; she fumed. I could see the heat coming off of her like steam in the cold. She was dressed in a huge tent of a dress, her coat open since she couldn't zip it over her belly. A pair of moccasin-style boots were on her feet and I couldn't help but laugh when I saw the tops of her socks. They were two different colors.

"Hi sis," I said, bending into the car to give her a hug. "Are you planning on getting out of the car or should we set up the table out here?"

"If you'd get out of the way, I'd get out of the car," she said huffily.

"Let me give you a hand," I said generously. I grabbed her hands and when she'd turned and put her feet on the ground, I heaved backwards, pulling the weight of my sister and my niece or nephew out of the car. Maybe I pulled a little too hard, because her big belly bumped into me and almost sent me flying.

"Dammit, Kenna," Bekka snapped. "Can't you do anything right?"

"She sure can," Nicky said, coming up and wrapping his arms around my waist. He dropped a kiss on top of my head and stared down at Bekka. "Hi, you must be Bekka. I'm Nicky, Kenna's boyfriend." He held his hand out to Bekka while she stared at him. I could see a gleam of speculation in her eyes, or maybe I was just thinking I saw it because of what Mara had said earlier. I didn't know which, but I did know that if she made a move on Nicky, I'd deck her, pregnant or not.

"Come on, Bekka. You shouldn't be out in the cold. I know Mom's been anxious for you to get here."

"Shawn's not here yet?"

Shawn was our older brother and the golden boy of the family. He'd gotten married right out of college and had already given Mom and Dad two grandchildren. His wife, Jenna, was a saint and fit in the family perfectly.

"Nope, but you know Shawn. He'll probably show up after all the work's done and then take credit for it."

"Mara," I said, trying to sound shocked though I giggled a little because that was exactly what Shawn had a habit of doing. "You're going to give Nicky here a bad impression."

"We wouldn't want Nicky to have a bad impression of the family now, would we? Could you help me into the house?" Bekka asked Nicky.

"Sure thing, Miss Bekka." He took her arm, rolling his eyes as he looked back at me. I grinned back at him and stuck out my tongue. He snorted at me.

"Hi, Kenna."

Shit, Steven. I'd forgotten all about him. I whirled, almost losing my footing in the snow. He grabbed my arm, pulling me a bit closer than was necessary.

"How are you, Kenna?"

"I'm great, Steven. I know I didn't congratulate you and Bekka when we first found out about the pregnancy. I'm so happy for you both," I said, seeing Mara behind Steven's back. I had to fight back the smile as she made gagging motions with her hand and acted like she was going to vomit.

"That's very nice of you," Steven said, oblivious to Mara. "You look great. Have you lost weight?"

My weight had always been a problem for Steven. Mom had always said my figure was lush. Steven, on nice days, had called it overblown. He'd always chided me when I ate, trying to force me on diets that I didn't want.

"Maybe, but Nicky likes me just the way I am," I said snidely, pulling away from his hands.

"I'm sorry," Steven said. "I never did it to be mean. I worried about your health."

"I'm very healthy, Steven. Why don't you go worry about your wife?"

"She was a mistake, Kenna. One that I so very much regret. I miss you. I miss those little trips we used to take on our days off. I miss the walks in the park. I miss talking to you. I should never have married Bekka," he said quickly. "I should have given her the money for the abortion and not broken our wedding day the way I did."

"Steven, do you realize what you're saying?"

"I'm saying that I love you, Kenna. I love you and I miss you and I want you back." He tried to drag me into his arms, but I fought him off.

"Mara? Go back into the house and tell Nicky that we need to go help Dad with the horses, okay?" When she'd disappeared through the door, I turned to Steven. "I'm going to tell you this once and once only. After this if you touch me again, you'll be pulling back a stump. Steven, you're an ass. I'm glad you two are together. I can't think of any two people who are more suited to each other. That child you're talking so blithely of aborting is part of me as well. It's my niece or nephew my sister is carrying. That's murder and it's something I don't condone. You stay the fuck away from me and never, ever talk to me again, do you understand?"

"Kenna?" Nicky called, standing at the top of the porch. I could have kissed him. As a matter of fact, maybe that would help cement in Steven's mind that there was no part of me that wanted anything to do with any part of him.

"Coming, sweetheart," I called. I pulled away from Steven and growled at him when he tried to stop me. "Don't touch me."

"Kenna, wait, I didn't mean it like that. Please, Kenna," he called, but I was already half way up the steps.

I grabbed Nick by the lapels of his coat and pulled him down so I could reach his lips. The kiss was long, lusty and as intimate as two people could be while standing in the center of a freezing cold porch. When I let him go, his eyes stayed closed for just a second longer, as if he were savoring the kiss.

"Hmm, I don't know what I did but please tell me so I can do it again," he said, drawing me into his arms. He looked at Steven, who stood fuming at the bottom of the steps, and then back at me. I smiled up at him and played with the buttons on his shirt.

"It's just because you're here, Nicky. You'll never know how much this means. It was the best Christmas present you could ever give me."

"Well, we'll have to see about that," he said, rubbing his cold nose against mine. "Shall we go help your dad with the horses and allow Steven here to pass so he might go and rub his wife's feet?"

"Sounds wonderful," I said, grabbing Nicky's hand and pulling him from the porch, toward the big barn that housed the horses and the sleigh as well as the wagon we used for hay rides in the fall. Dad got into the traditional stuff, like sleigh bells and fur rugs, hot chocolate and carols. Mom might crack the whip, but Dad was the one that got really mushy around the holidays. I'd even seen him shed a few tears over hand-made presents that touched his heart.

"Hi, Dad," I called when we entered the big barn.

"Is that a hay loft up there?" Nicky asked, a gleam in his eyes.

"It certainly is," I said primly. "Don't make me tell my father on you, Nicholas Evans."

He wiggled his eyebrows at me. "Awww, come on, Kenna. Come roll in the hay with me," he said, holding out his hands.

Oh, the evils of temptations and he was a huge one. I reached out for his hand and felt him pull me into his embrace, his eyes growing serious. "Are you all right?" he asked softly, letting his forehead rest against mine. "You aren't..."

"Going to cry? No, I'm done crying for Steven. He was never what I thought I saw in him. The things he just said proved it. He told me he wished he'd given Bekka the money for an abortion and married me anyway." I let a little of the outrage I was feeling seep into my voice.

"Why, that scoundrel. I'll go and pummel him if you want," Nick teased, making me laugh.

"You'll pummel him?" I snorted, covering my mouth with my mittened hand.

"Who are you, my grandfather?"

Nick swooped me up in his arms, his eyes searching for an unoccupied stall. He carted me in one, despite my protest that I was too heavy for him to carry, and dumped me in the pile of hay in the corner. "Grandfather?" he asked, following me down and pressing me further into the sweet smelling hay. His hands moved under my jacket, finding my bare skin. They were cold and a shiver sent goose bumps flying over my skin. I shrieked and giggled, struggling under him until his mouth found mine.

When he lifted his head, his eyes were warm, his cheeks flushed. "I want you so much, Kenna. I don't know how I manage to keep my hands off you around your family."

"You don't have to keep them completely off," I giggled. "Just watch where they go and I don't think Daddy will get out his shotgun."

"Ahh, a redneck wedding," he grinned. "I take advantage of his virginal, sweet daughter and am forced to marry her at the end of a shotgun."

"Virginal? I haven't been virginal since tenth grade and Matthew Philyaw at the spring picnic."

"Kenna Phylaw, well I can definitely see why that relationship didn't stick," he teased.

"Oh hush. Matt was sweet, and cute, and quarterback of our football team. He married the senior prom queen and they have six kids now. He owns the car dealership in town."

"You weren't homecoming queen or prom queen?" he asked, nuzzling his nose into my neck.

"Nope. Not even close. I was the ugly duckling that never made it to beautiful swan. Do you know what it was like going to high school after beautiful Bekka?" I sighed, arching my head back to give him more room.

An off-key bass sounded from the door of the barn. "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas." Dad's voice, more bellow than song, echoed off the roof and through the stalls. There were whickers of greeting from the horses and my dad's voice answering them, talking to each.

"Damn, that man has perfect timing, doesn't he?" Nick growled, placing one last lingering kiss on my throat. He rose, pulling me with him and brushing the hay off me. "Come on; let's go get the horses hitched to the sleigh before your father finds how wicked his daughter is and how she pulled my poor self into the stall for a roll in the hay."

"Oh, poor Nick. So abused," I laughed, wrapping my arms around his neck and plucking a piece of hay from his hair. I trailed my hand over his face, tugging lightly on his head to pull it down where I could reach him. "Kiss me, once more before we have to go be dutiful."

"I thought you'd never ask." He wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me off my feet so that he could reach me easier. His lips found mine, soft and sweet but swiftly changing to demanding and heated. I growled at the change, my nails digging into the back of his jacket. God, I wished we were back in bed.

When he let me loose, my lips were throbbing, swollen, and I wanted his mouth on mine again. I took a step away and swayed, hearing him laugh as he grabbed a hold of my waist and held me up until I regained my footing.

"Wow," I said softly, glaring at him when he laughed again. "Come on," I said, holding out my hand.

"What have you two been up to?" my dad asked when he saw us.

"We came in to give you a hand with the horses."

"Oh, and this is from giving me a hand with the horses?" he asked, plucking a piece of hay out of my hair. I could feel my face flaming as bright as my hair.

"She couldn't help it, sir. She was being a smart ass, so I threw her in a pile of hay."

"Then she got up and threw you in one, too?" he asked, picking another piece of hay out of Nick's hair.

"Something like that," Nick said, smiling wickedly. "So then, before she could go and do anything else that would permanently damage my sense of propriety, I forced her to get up so we could come and see if you needed help with anything, sir."

My dad reached out and gently closed my mouth, open in shock from Nick's bullshit. My dad had a teasing, happy light in his eyes. "Why don't you two go see if you can get Duchess and Queenie out of their stalls? I'll take care of Butch and Sundance, okay?"

"Sure thing, sir. Maybe you should tell your daughter to keep her hands to herself and we can get this done before afternoon."

"Why you..." My mouth was gaping. I couldn't believe what just he'd told my father. Nick took two steps away from me and gave me an innocent look.

"Daddy, I never..."

"Oh don't give me that, we both know you have." Dad snorted as I gaped at him. "Son, I'd offer to hold her to give you a head start but I don't think she'd let me right now."

"Thanks anyways, sir, I'll do my best to hold her off."

I couldn't believe they were ganging up on me. I turned, my red hair swinging under my cap. "Fine, hitch up your own damned horses. I'm going in to get some hot chocolate." I sniffed and lifted my head.

"Sounds good, honey. You can help your mom start dinner and then we'll get everyone in the sleigh and head up to Pine's Pass. I've got the sled ready to be towed behind the sleigh. Bring a Thermos of coffee when you come back out, could you?"

I'd been dismissed just that easily. I walked out of the barn, turning back once to watch Nick and the way he was getting along with my father. They laughed over something Nick said and then Dad showed Nick the correct way to hitch up the horses. I felt warm all over.

That feeling lasted until I opened the back door into the kitchen and took off of my boots. Hands reached out, grabbing me around my waist and dragging me back into a small corner of the mudroom that couldn't be seen from the kitchen. I turned, slapping the hands away, only to see Steven's smarmy smile. "I thought I told you not to touch me again?"

"Aw. Come on, baby, don't be that way," he cajoled in a tone of voice that had my stomach creeping up into my throat.

"Your wife is in the next room. What do you think she's going to do if I scream rape?" I stared him down, waiting until he pulled his hands off of me. "I have a question, Steven. Why didn't you go back to the force after we broke up? I heard some rumors about someone's wife filing charges of sexual harassment. Is that the truth? Were you fired?"

"I retired from the force. Moving up to bigger and better," he smirked.

"Does Bekka know of these rumors?"

"No, and she doesn't need to, especially as close to her due date as she is. You wouldn't want to hurt your sister, would you?"

"I, unlike the two of you, would never purposefully hurt someone, Steven. Now, if you don't want her finding out, you'll leave me alone. Understand?"

"This isn't over yet, Kenna."

"Yes, it is," I said, though my heart was in my throat, beating a sickening tattoo. I pulled away from his hand, opening the mudroom door and walking through, slamming it in his face. Forcing a smile, I greeted Mom with a kiss on her cheek, rubbing my cold nose against her. "Dad's getting the horses hitched to the sleigh and he's got the toboggan tied to the back for the tree. He wants a Thermos of coffee to take with us."

"Where's your Nicky?" she asked, looking behind me. "I thought you two were joined at the hip."

"Nope, I cut the apron strings," I joked. "He's out helping Dad with the horses."

"I like him, Kenna. He seems really stuck on you."

I heard Bekka snort behind me and pretended I didn't hear it. I wouldn't upset her or fight with her, not now. Maybe after the baby was born we'd have it out once and for all, but I wouldn't do it now. Or here, in front of Mom.

"You staying here, Bekka, or should I tell Dad to get out the extra team?"

"Uncalled for, Kenna," Mom said, though I could see the gentle understanding in her pretty green eyes.

"I'm sorry, Mom," I replied quickly, feeling pretty little for being so cruel. I actually owed my sister a thank you for what she'd done. If not for her, I'd never have really noticed Nicky or found out how sinful his kisses were, or how wonderfully he filled me.