Holly - I first developed a crush on Keith Carter more than 15 years ago when I was seven years old. One day I was at the playground with my mother, Miss Carol and her twins, Brad and Tommy Jr. My parents were best friends with Miss Carol and her husband, Tommy Thomas Sr. I hated the twins. They were two years older than me and it was always two against one. They were picking on me and taking my barbie dolls and getting sand all over them, Mom was busy watching my little brother and talking to Miss Carol. She was not paying any attention to me. I was in tears watching my pretty Barbies being destroyed when all of sudden Keith appeared out of nowhere to rescue my dolls, push the twins into the sand and tell them to pick on someone their own size. I have thought back to that day often over the years.
I grew up in a small town in Tennessee called Hanover. The biggest business in our town was the furniture company owned by my father and Tommy Sr. This made them two of the most powerful people in the town and made our family among the wealthiest. When I was a little I was a Daddy's girl. I would come running to him every evening when he came home from work.
While being ganged up by the twins was the worst thing that happened in my childhood, Keith had a much more difficult time. His never knew his father and his mother had a drug problem. They lived in a trailer park with his grandmother.
As we got older, Keith had a reputation as being a troublemaker. He had long hair and always seemed angry. However, the truth was he was far better behaved than most of the other teenagers in Hanover where seemingly every young person is restless and bored living in a small town where there was very little to do. When I was growing up parents were largely oblivious to the crystal meth problem that was so prevalent among people in Hanover that were around my age.
Keith would always look at me with these intense piercing black eyes. Until I got to high school there was unspoken attraction between us though we had little to do with each other. I always had a school girl crush on him and would fantasize about him.
At our high school the only sport that most people paid attention to was football. Keith was on the soccer team. In the fall of my freshman year of high school I would make my friend Emily go the soccer games with me. The crowds were very small so he must of noticed me. After the last game of the season as I was leaving, Keith asked us if we wanted to go for a walk with him. Emily made some excuse and it was just Keith and I. Keith is a quiet guy and he did not say much. At the end of the walk in front of my house he asked me to the homecoming dance. This was a shock since Keith was not the school dance type. This was the beginning of the six months that we went out where Keith became my first love.
I never once went to Keith's house and he only rarely came in my house. Much of the time that we spent together were walking on trails or going fishing. Slowly Keith started opening up on these walks. As teenagers we talked a lot about our future plans. Keith was determined to get out of this town, get his college degree and have a far different life for his children than he has had. I would discuss a future with Keith but I remember him saying that that we should focus on the present because there were forces that would not allow us to get too serious. I assumed he meant my family. These walks were mostly very innocent. We would hold hands and sometimes make out but mainly just walk and occasionally talk.
I knew that my parents were not thrilled about Keith but they did not forbid me from seeing him. We had Keith over for dinner two times. My father would be very arrogant and brag about all that he accomplished, tell him that I was used too a certain way of life and really talk down to Keith. Keith was quiet, polite and obviously uncomfortable. Both times after Keith left I had a huge fight with my parents about the way dad acted and he pleaded his innocence and said that Keith needs to grow thicker skin.
By the spring I felt like I was in love in Keith and ready to begin a sexual relationship. My parents allowed me to stay home one weekend when they visited my aunt and uncle in Kentucky. I was told that I was not allowed to see Keith that weekend. However, I invited Keith to spend the night. To this day, I question if it all was part of my father's plans to set us up. Keith had been in the house for about fifteen minutes when the Thomas' showed up. Keith tried to hide in my little brother's room but Tommy Sr found him and worse Miss Carol found his overnight bag and the condoms that he brought with him. All hell broke loose. They kicked Keith out of the house and Miss Carol stayed at the house until my parents returned.
I was grounded for the rest of the summer and banned from seeing Keith. Keith and his mother moved away shortly after.
KEITH - Holly was cute and curvy with long blonde hair and she always seemed happy and peppy. I never had any doubt that Holly's father would eventually prevent us from being together. He controlled everything that happened in Hanover and he was certainly not going to allow his only daughter to be with someone from the trailer park. I tried to tell Holly this but I don't think she believed me. I was hoping she got over it, move past it and get far away from Hanover.
After the incident at Holly's house, her father bribed us by getting my mother a good job in Alabama with the one condition that I not contact Holly. The deal worked out good for us. My mother needed a new start to break her destructive habits. She did well at her job and after a couple years met a great stable guy and they got married. I spent my senior year completely focused on improving my grades and getting in college.
Holly - I could not deal with the fact that there was no resolution to our relationship. We were perfectly happy and then there was an incident which was not between us and we never even had a chance to talk after that. For a reason that I did not understand at the time, Keith unfriended me and everyone from Hanover from Facebook. I sulked the rest of the summer and half my sophomore year before coming out of my funk. Eventually I got on with my life but I had lost my innocence and my relationship with my parents were never the same.
When I was senior I tried to friend Keith on Facebook. I have some boyfriends over the last two years but I just never felt the same way as I had felt about Keith with anyone else. I was curious to find out how Keith was doing. He did not respond for several months and I just assumed that he did not want to have anything do with me. However, he accepted my friend request on my 18th birthday and wrote me a note.
Keith said he was sorry about what happened but he knew we never had a chance and tried to tell me. He said that my father's offer was too good to pass up and talked about how well his mother was doing once she got out of Hanover. Evidently Keith assumed that I knew about this deal but it was really the first time I heard about it. Keith was doing well in college and had a serious girlfriend. I felt better now that I had some closure with Keith but my anger with parents were at an all time high.
During the years I was college I would occasionally e - mail with Keith but he was was not a big part of my life. He had gotten married and had son.
My college life can be divided into half. The first two years, I was a wild child acting out as much as possible to show my parents they were not in control. I got numerous tattoos and several piercings.
During this rebellious phase I was crazy and a bit of a slut. This was never more so than when I answered a Craig's List ad about wanting attractive young women between 18 and 21 to shoot an adult video. The ad promised to pay $1,000. The company consisted of a short guy and a big guy. The big guy barely talked. I was hired on the spot. I did dye my hair black, call myself Cassie and say I was from Texas but there was definitely a part of me that hoped I was recognized.
I had plenty of sex once I started college so I was not even nervous the day of the shoot. The short guy started the video by interviewing me. He asked me some questions while I sat on a bed fully clothed about my sexual history. I was encouraged to exaggerate if necessary to make the answers as interesting as possible. I said I first had sex when I was 14 when it was actually 17. I said I masturbated daily when I barely did at all since starting college and becoming a slut. I said I wanted to make a porn because I loved sex and wanted to try new things. I said I had sex with about 25 different guys when the real answer was 10. When he asked about the I craziest place I had sex, I completely made up a story about having sex on a plane going to Disneyworld for my High School Senior class trip. However, when he asked if I was ever caught having sex, I just lied and said no.
I then kneeled in front of the big guy and pulled down his pants and gave him a blow job. His cock was by far the biggest I ever seen and they encouraged me to take in as much as possible so that I was gagging. After about ten minutes they had me strip and the big guy started fucking me. It was rough dirty sex. Then the small guy had his turn with me. I would later find out that this was not part of the porno. This small guy just wanted to fuck me.