"You do have a condom" ... taken from the end of Heads and Tails ~ Part 1
I can see the answer in his eyes, and I know that whatever happens next is up to me. I ask myself why. Why did I ask this; why didn't I just let things happen? I see Mike's eyes. They're sad now, his shoulders falling slightly. "No." The sound is barely a whisper escaping from his lips. Lips that look, to me, as a gift to taste and enjoy, beckoning me forward. I put my hands to his face and bring his lips close to mine, hearing myself whisper lovingly, "That's okay. We can do other things." I want to hold him close to me and love him. My mind gives in to this, knowing that it would have lost this battle with my body.
Standing, I take Mike's hand and lead him to my bedroom. We pause at the door. I can feel his eyes watching me, like the eyes of a wolf stalking his prey. I shiver as I hold his hand and we walk to my window. Looking from my high view of the city below, we see the lights brightening the dark night outside us. The lights shine into my window and into my room, giving the feeling of soft candlelight flickering along the walls. My senses are alert to everything, every muscle taut with expectation. I feel empowered to be here with him and to know that this step he's left up to me.
"Are you sure?" his voice calls to me, a deep hungry sound.
"Yes, I want this. I need this." I gaze at his lips, and press mine slowly to his. Our mouths first feel like feathers, nestled softly together to show their beauty, but this soon erupts into a kiss so full of need that our tongues collide, trying to decide who is the master and who is the slave. I pull my mouth from his and let my tongue lick his lips. "Let me love you." I hear my desperation, and I know he'll let me take the lead, the answer coming from his eyes.
My stomach flips as this newfound energy and power rolls through my body. I feel myself separating once again from my body, as I watch a scene so erotic and powerful begin to take place. My hand moves from his and I pause, taking one more glance out my window. I look to him and smile, feeling the need I have for him reflected in his eyes. He's waiting for me; waiting for my touch. My outer self, the part that has left me, watches as this woman, who has just discovered her own passion, takes her first step of self-discovery. My hand cups his face, caressing his cheek. Letting my fingers move to his jaw, I trace it's fine structure. My other hand touches his arm, feeling the cords move as he flinches under my touch. I look at my fingers and I feel my outer being return to me, so it, too, can enjoy the feeling of Mike's skin under mine.
"Ohh," I hear myself moan. His hand takes my waist, and while his fingers massage me, I feel the heat from his body surrounding me, enveloping me in its warmth. He's letting me lead for the both of us, letting me explore my new sense of passion. I feel the trembles of his body while my fingers move up his arm to his shoulder, feeling the restraint. He's holding back, wanting not to frighten me. My heart is touched by this gift he's given me, and I lean in to taste his neck.
My tongue moves in circles against his skin. I can feel his pulse beating fast beneath its thin protective shell. I step closer, my breasts pressing against his chest, my bare body against the full length of him. The softness of my breasts feels the coarseness of the hair on his chest. I can feel my nipples tighten at the sensation, and let my body rub against him. His hands pull me to him, one hand playing with my hair while the other grips my hips, pushing his body deeper against me. I can feel the bulge in his jeans, and I rub my pelvis hard against it. I hear his growl of want.