Finding Home

Thanks for reading and for your kind comments. If you were wondering when disaster would strike...

Monday

Andy woke up Monday morning in a downright shitty mood. The rest that had come so easily with Sara in the bed next to him, was proving elusive once again. Marty did not calm down until much later than he had hoped, and he knew that trying to get him out of bed and moving this morning would be a Herculean task. As he gathered the laundry for his absent roommates, he was feeling sorrier and sorrier for himself. His mood worsened as he fired off a text to Sara,

I love you, SGD. Kick ass, take names.

He followed this up with a group text to the other five women working in New York City.

You ladies are amazing! Kick ass, take names.

His mood improved briefly when Sara texted him back.

I love you too, ADD. Miss you, XOXO.

Andy had seen plenty of long-distance relationships in the Corps. He knew that one of the keys to making them work was your individual ability to get your shit together. You couldn't be a co-dependent mess, and have any hope of surviving a deployment. His inner drill sergeant gave him a royal ass-chewing, and Andy sulked his way through doing the laundry. He showered, shaved, and considered how to coax Marty out of bed.

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At 7:30 AM, Marty accompanied him to the Dining Commons. Andy hoped some food would improve both their moods. Jeannie saw them both, and began to laugh. Andy's scowl shut her down instantly. He immediately felt like a huge tool.

"Jeannie, I'm sorry. It's not been an easy morning, and I'm afraid Marty and I are both feeling a bit sorry for ourselves. The people we're used to seeing first thing in the morning aren't here. If I wasn't the one living this drama, I'd think it was funny, too."

"It's cool Andy. I think it's amazing that you're willing to do this for Coach Moses. He must really trust you to leave Marty in your care," she said kindly.

"Well, thank you. We may both be crying on your shoulder before tomorrow when John gets back."

She grinned at him.

"So, I'd love to hear about your weekend, particularly your time with Todd. Let's hear it, lady," said Andy, feigning a chipperness he most certainly did not feel.

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On the walk to class, Andy noted he was not the only one missing his significant other. Cooper looked downright miserable, and Andy took some consolation in the fact that misery did indeed love company. Marty's mood had improved with some food, though it had been a struggle to keep him from hitting the sugary breakfast selections that would have wreaked havoc on him later. Once they arrived, Marty went out of his way to meet Sophia and Elizabeth. Reigning him in, Andy got him settled with his iPad and his ear buds. Marty had some work to do, so he hoped it would keep him partially occupied. Jen Land went out of her way to greet Marty, and she helpfully explained Marty's situation to the class. Andy grinned when he realized that she had a better grasp of the facts than he himself did. Class began and everyone settled into their work.

____________________________________________________________

At the first break, Andy took his phone off the 'do not disturb' setting, and noted that he had several missed calls and voicemails. There were three from Sara, two from Ellen, and one from Eden. There was even a New York number he did not recognize. He wondered what the first surprise gift had been to elicit such an immediate response. This thought brought a smile to his face. Andy nodded to Jen to keep an eye on Marty, and he stepped into a vacant classroom. He called Sara, and the call was picked up on the first ring. Andy was surprised when it was Gina who answered.

"Andy, it's Gina," she said tensely.

"Hello Momma G," he replied. Once the distress in her voice registered, he asked. "What's wrong? Is Sara OK?"

"She is -- but then again -- she isn't. Andy, I'm going to give the phone to Eden to let her try to explain." He heard the phone being handed off.

"Andy, I have to tell you something, and you have to promise to just let me get it out before you speak," began Eden. "Can you do that?"

"I'll try. But Snips, you're really starting to worry me here," he said.

"Let me start at the beginning. Do you remember the guy Sara said she had a crush on in high school? Well, his name is Brian Boyle, and he's now a model. He's working on this shoot with us, and he's Sara's partner -- sort of like you were the last time."

Andy felt a sinking feeling in his stomach.

"Brian recognized Sara when we were walking in this morning. They talked and caught up a bit, and then were comfortable with each other during their first two shoots. I could tell it was bothering Ellen, and she pulled me over. I assured her Brian was just an old friend from high school. I had no idea he was her crush -- and Andy -- I need you to believe me on this. I had no damn idea."

Andy felt the bile and his breakfast rising in his throat.

"So, on their third shoot, I stick around just to see for myself. Andy, he had his hands all over her, and then," she paused and got very emotional. "Andy, he kissed her, and she was kissing him back. Ellen lost her shit. And then, suddenly, it totally hit Sara what she had just done."

Andy was sweating, and finding his breath labored.

"Andy are you still there?" asked Eden.

"Yes," he said coldly.

"Andy, she feels awful. We all, I mean Kail, Grace, Sydney, Haylee, and I - laid into her pretty good. Ellen just about tore her in half. Even her mom is super pissed."

"Is she there?" asked Andy.

"She is. Listen, Rex; she knows how royally she screwed up," said Eden lovingly.

"I'd like to talk to her," he said stonily. Once again, he heard the phone being passed.

"Baby, I'm so sorry," was the next voice he heard.

"So, let me get this straight: we've not been apart for 24 hours and an old high school crush has his hands all over you, and starts making out with you in front of our friends, your mom, and my sister. Does that about cover it?"

"Andy, I'm so sorry. I don't know what happened," she sobbed. "One minute we were talking, and he was telling me how good I looked, and that he always wanted to ask me out in high school. Then next thing I know, we were kissing. I'm so sorry baby."

"Please don't call me that," Andy said icily.

He was silent for a time, and he could hear Sara crying on the other line.

"Were you wearing your ring?"

"What?"

"Were you wearing the engagement ring I put on your finger? You know, the one you accepted when you agreed to be my wife?" he asked harshly.

She paused, and then replied in a weak voice, "Yes."

Andy had been standing with his back against the wall. When she answered him, he slid to the floor and tears flooded his eyes. His breath came in gasps. He willed himself to keep his shit together. Finally, he spoke.

"Sara: please give the ring to either Eden or Ellen. I don't think I want you wearing it right now."

She pleaded with him, "Andy, please. I know I messed up. I'm so, so sorry. We can figure this out."

"Sorry is exactly what you are, Sara. You're a sorry excuse for a fiancé, and I'm going to stop talking now before I say more things that we'll both regret. Please don't try to talk to me for a while. I need some time to sort through this," he said in a chilling voice.

"I understand. Andy, please know I love you," she said remorsefully.

"Bullshit," he said and hung up the phone.

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Haylee and Sydney texted Jeannie and Cooper to let them know what happened. Grace had done the same with Jen Land. The three conferred, Jen dismissed class, and they went in search of Andy. They found him on the floor in an empty classroom, weeping. There was a pool of vomit near him where he could no longer keep his breakfast down. Jeannie hugged him, and he put his head on her shoulder as he continued to sob. Everyone in the room was now crying, and Marty came in to see what the commotion was all about. Jen explained to Marty that Andy was very sad, because something bad happened to him. Marty innocently replied, "We should call Sara. She loves Drew. She can help him feel better."

At that point, Christopher and Helen found them. Cooper had called his brother, who was in town with Helen looking through various plans for the two different projects his firm had going on at Colton. With a nod to Cooper, the two brothers helped Andy to his feet. His grandmother came and hugged him, despite Andy's protestations that he had puke all over him -- which indeed -- he did.

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Half an hour later, Andy was lying on the couch at the cabin, and Christopher and Helen were getting the whole story from Ellen and Gina. Andy's head was swimming. He could hear the conversation on speaker phone, and he finally had to step out on the deck to vomit over the side. He was covered in sweat and vomit, and once the call was over, Christopher coaxed him to take a shower.

"Not in my room, Chris. Please. Sara and I..." he broke off.

"I know, Andy. I know. Come on. You can use the shower in our room," he said soothingly.

"I've got nothing to wear. I need to go back to the Commons, but I really don't think I can go there," he said haltingly.

"Don't worry. Cooper and Jeannie are getting your things. They'll be here shortly," he replied.

"Thanks Christopher," Andy said in an embarrassed tone. "This is not how I saw this day unfolding."

"You're welcome. A wise man once told me family looks after family," he smiled. "Once you're cleaned up, what would you like to go do? You don't need to stay around here. Let's go do something -- whatever you want we can go do."

Andy was preparing to turn this idea down when his grandmother spoke, "Yes, Andrew. You and Christopher will go do something. Sitting in this house, or in the Commons, moping about will not do. Think of something that will help you clear your mind," she said forcefully.

"There's an indoor range in town. Shooting will help. It's not my sniper rifle, but I think some range time would help," he said.

"Good. When you're done, the girls should all be here. The car to get them should already be there. We will all have a chance to sit down and talk," she said in a matter-of-fact way.

"You sent a plane to go get them?" asked a shocked Andy.

His grandmother looked at him lovingly. "My dear boy, that damned city has taken more from this family than it can ever repay. Yes, I sent a plane. That place will not take Sara from us, too. They'll all be here, and then we will sit down and talk this through."� � � � � � � � � � � � �

"Grandma, no offense, but I don't think I'm ready to talk. I said -- well -- I said some very ugly things to Sara," he confessed. "I'm afraid I just poured gasoline on the fire."

"Yes, I'm sure you did. Your fiancé wounded you deeply, Andrew. You wanted to wound her back. It's perfectly understandable," she replied.

"Well, I don't think it's something I can walk back. I really don't want her wearing the ring I gave her. And please know I'll buy out her half of the house. I'll make sure the company gets the full sale price refunded," he said apologetically.

"You will do no such thing," she said as she came over to him and held his face in her hands. "Stop talking. Stop thinking. Go shoot. Teach Christopher. Go get drunk if you need to, but stop processing this."

"That's just it, grandma. I can't," he said. "This is my mess, and I feel like I need to clean it up."

"First, yes, you can. Second, Andrew when you go Lone Ranger it does not go well. Do not make this another personal crusade. You have people who love you and Sara both. Please let us help you," she said lovingly. She smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek.

"Now go. You smell something awful. Your clothes will be here when you get out of the shower -- and by that, I mean a real shower -- not one of those silly, 30-second military showers."

_____________________________________________________________

Three hours later, Christopher tapped Andy on the shoulder. Andy slid his ear protection off and secured his weapon.

"Remind me to never get on your bad side. I have no idea what good shooting is supposed to look like, but I'm guessing I'm seeing good shooting," he grinned.

Two silhouette targets were on the floor in their bay of the shooting range. A hole the size of a silver half-dollar was in the head portion of each target thanks to Andy's accurate and rapid fire. There was a matching hole over the heart of each target. He'd rolled through three boxes of ammunition, though Christopher had yet to fire a single shot.

"I'm sorry," said Andy sheepishly. "I'm supposed to be teaching you how to shoot." He was quickly reloading four of the M-11's magazines. He'd alternated between weapons as he self-medicated, trying to take his mind off his situation.

Christopher grinned at him. "No worries, brother. I'm just glad to be with you. Shooting is not a big deal. There will be other opportunities."

Andy grinned at him.

"Can I make an observation?" asked Christopher. "And please know I do so reluctantly seeing the number of holes you just put in three human silhouette targets."

Andy nodded.

"Ellen grew up without a dad. There was a guy at Princeton who figured out that beautiful women who grew up without a father to tell them how beautiful, and special they are -- well - they tend to be pretty easy prey. Particularly if you're a guy who will tell them things their dads never told them. Ellen figured that out, eventually, but it took lots of work with a counselor for her to get there."

"This guy sounds like a total d-bag. Who the hell hits on a woman with an engagement ring on her finger? And it's not like she's sporting cubic zirconium. I'm not trying to absolve Sara of blame. She's a big girl and should be held responsible for her actions. But I am trying to say that there are dudes who, unlike Peter Parker, refuse to use their power for good. They know they have great power, and they wield it irresponsibly."

Andy thought for a moment. "Brother, I appreciate what you're trying to do here. But what the hell am I supposed to do? Christopher, she made out with this guy in front of my sister, her mom, and our friends! So what? Now, I can never be apart from her for fear of the next time some other dickweed figures this out? What if this happens around our kids? Man, if she'll do this in front of Ellen and Eden..." he stopped and began to tear up.

"Drew, I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to rile you up, or defend Sara. I just know that we all have self-destructive shit we do that drives the people we love the most away from us. And listen old friend, that girl does love you," he said reassuringly.

"Well, she's got a funny way of showing me that," said Andy darkly.

They were interrupted when proprietor of the range came up to them. "Sgt. DeGroat, there are two women here to see you. One of them says she's your sister, and the other says she's your mother-in-law. I can send them away if you want me to."

Andy frowned, "No, that's OK. I'll be out as soon as I police my brass, and stow my gear."

The man looked at him and nodded. "Tell you what, I'll police the brass for you. Don't worry, I'll save it. You strike me as a man who likes to load his own ammo. That shit's not cheap anymore. Those ladies scare the shit out of me, and I'm the one packing," he chuckled.

"Deal. And thank you," said Andy. "I owe you a round next time I see you at the VFW Hall."

"Semper Fi," the man said, giving the traditional Marine Corps salute.

"Semper Fi," Andy replied.

Andy nodded to Christopher, and he went out in the waiting area while Andy stowed his weapons. He took his time, partially to clear his mind, but also because he had no idea what he was going to say to either Ellen or Gina.

___________________________________________________________

"Drew are you OK?" asked Ellen as she hugged him. The fact that she had been crying was painfully evident.

"No. But I will be," said Andy honestly. "What the hell are you doing here? You're right at the beginning of a week-long shoot. You should be in NYC."

"I quit," she said decisively.

Andy looked at her, stunned.

"Drew, I argued against using professional male models. The one's who aren't gay will hit on anything that moves. I didn't want to put the girls in that kind of environment. Then, to top it all off, Donna watches the first pairing and looks at me and says, 'You were right. This is all wrong. They look like androgenous stick figures next to the girls. Shoot this morning, and then get the Colton guys back here, ASAP.'" She paused as her eyes filled with tears.

"Drew, you're the only brother I have. I thought we lost you once. That job means nothing without my family. I hate myself for what happened. I put Sara in a horrible situation, and then just watched it happen. Please forgive me."

Andy just held his sister for a time. Finally, he spoke. "Of course, I forgive you. You're my little sister." He looked into her face.

"I'm going to have some questions for you later. I'm going to want to know everything, but I probably don't need to know everything. Please be thinking about what I need to know."

She nodded and kissed him on the cheek.

He turned to Gloria, "Mom, thanks for coming." He smiled to her.

She hugged him and began to cry. "Oh Andy. I am so, so very sorry. I was there too, you know. I could not believe how she was acting, but I didn't do anything either." She looked up at him. "Andy, we failed you, and Sara. The people who love you both stood by and did nothing. I knew Sara needed to see a counselor and talk about her issues with her dad, but I was afraid she'd blame me for all that's happened in her life. Andy, she's told me how you've talked with her. You're the only one who's loved her in that way." She began to sob.

The range owner looked at Andy with a raised eyebrow. Clearly, two women weeping in the waiting area of a gun range were out of the ordinary, and probably not good for business. Andy looked at Gina and said, "Let's clear out of here. There's lots to talk about and this is not the place to do it." She sniffled, wiped her face with the bandana Andy offered her, and nodded.

_________________________________________________________

Two hours later Andy had talked with everyone but Sara. She had been dropped off at the Adams' residence, and Dr. Adams had given her something to help her calm down. She was, at present, sleeping in Eden's room. The other five young women gave Andy their account of what went down, and how strange and surreal the entire thing seemed. At one point, Gina pulled him aside and let him know that Brian Boyle would be getting a visit from some concerned friends of her brother-in-law Vito. Andy nodded and smiled.

While Andy was no shrink, he'd spent a hell of a lot of time with a good one. Once he could set aside his hurt, he began to see a bit clearer. Christopher's words rang true to him. But there was one more call he needed to make. He excused himself and went outside.

Jessica picked up on the first ring.

"Dammit, Droobie. Are you OK?"

He laughed, "I'm getting there. Nothing a hug from my big sister wouldn't cure."

"I know little brother, I know. I'm so sorry for you," she said emotionally.

"How is she, 'Sica?" he asked suddenly.

Silence met his question.

"Look Jess, I know she called you. She had to. She loves you and you've been a great friend to her. It's not a hard question; how is Sara?"

After a thoughtful pause, the words came solemnly, "She's beside herself, Andrew. She knows she threw her life away because her high school crush was trying to get into her pants," she paused. "I don't think I've ever heard a more despondent person in my whole life."