False Accusations

This is a story about insecurity and the damage it can do. there is no BTB in this story. It could just as easily fit into the Loving wives category as well.

Lee Grant ordered her coffee and took a seat at the coffee shop. It wasn't her usual morning stop but she was on the way to see a new client and needed a caffeine hit. She looked up to see a new customer enter and Lee recognized her.

"Ann Cleave, is that you?"

Ann looked at the woman sitting at the table and whatever cheerfulness she felt that morning left her.

"Lee Grant, what are you doing in this part of town, slumming?"

"Client meeting. Is this your regular haunt?"

"Yes, ever since I left Coopers."

"I am shocked to hear that you left Coopers, I thought you were a lifer Ann."

"I was until you started accusing your husband of having an affair with me."

The coffee was dark and bitter, just perfect. Both women sipped and then made steady eye contact.

"Your accusations caused a lot of grief for Roger. The perception became reality, and truth didn't really matter. I realized that the accusations were enough to sink Roger's career at Coopers as long as I was employed there, so I fell on my own sword."

"Come on Ann, you gave up your career for your lover!"

"No, I did not! Roger and I were never lovers! We were friends and coworkers."

"So you are still maintaining that old lie?"

"Lee, think about it, why would I lie now? Why, after your divorce was made final, over a year ago? If I had been fucking your husband what would I stand to gain by lying?"

Lee was quiet. Ann had a valid point, she had no reason to lie.

"If Roger and I had been having an affair I would gladly own up to it, but we never did."

Lee and Roger had been married for seven years when Lee first thought that he was having an affair. Roger used to have sex with Lee several times a week but over time it became far less frequent. Even then he seemed preoccupied when they were together. Roger explained that there was a lot of work pressure and that two other young guns at the company were challenging for his position. This extra stress meant he spent more time at work but Lee suspected he was getting sex some where other than home.

Lee began to gather what she considered evidence. The extra hours at the office and lower sex drive we're the first two. There was a third clue, a receipt for lunch at the Place Desire Hotel. She suspected it was with whoever he was fucking, and what better place for lunch than a hotel with a room and a bed. She had also found a long blonde hair on the shoulder of his suit jacket, obviously not one of hers. The jacket also smelled of White Shoulders perfume.

Lee believed that this was solid evidence of Roger's adultery. She just needed to know who he was boning. The only woman that was close enough to Roger was Ann Cleave.

Ann recalled the terrible accusations and the pseudo evidence of Roger's indiscretion.

"Let me offer some information that you wouldn't listen to back then. Maybe it will help you come to terms with the truth."

"Roger was under attack at the office. Business was not good and the bottom line showed it. Two men were pushing hard to replace him and the ownership was listening to them. He spent a lot of hours turning the business around and defending himself. That is why he was less attentive to your needs. That hotel receipt was for a luncheon meeting with a client. I attended that meeting to take notes. Our table was underneath an air conditioning vent and I was wearing a dress that was not keeping me warm. It was so cold that my nipples were poking out and the client couldn't keep his eyes off them. Your husband gave me his suit jacket to keep me from freezing and maintain my modesty. It helped Roger to regain the clients attention. That blonde hair was mine. I was wearing my usual scent, "White Shoulders" that day. All the evidence you gathered to convince yourself that Roger was cheating was misinterpreted by you. Lee, you divorced an innocent man."

Lee wanted to scream at Ann, that she was wrong but there was a ring of truth to what she had just heard. Roger had said much the same, except he stopped trying to explain once he knew that nothing would stop Lee from divorcing him.

"Thank you Ann, I appreciate your honesty. Have you been in touch with Roger?"

"No, I do hear that he is still at Coopers though."

Several days later Lee worked up the courage to phone Roger at Coopers.

"Hello, Roger?"

That voice, unmistakable, sent a shiver up his spine.

"Lee."

"Can I set up an appointment with you? Preferably a lunch if you can."

"Why?"

"I need to discuss something with you."

"We don't have much to talk about, or are you gloating over the first anniversary of our divorce?"

"Please Roger, don't even joke about that. I need to talk to you."

"What about Lucia's Deli at 1pm today?"

"Thanks Roger, I will meet you there."

Roger had no idea what his crazy ex wanted. She got the house, alimony and had even given him an ulcer. What else could she want from him?

Lucia's Deli was a favourite of Lee and Roger's. It was where they had their first date.

Roger got there early so he could get a table that afforded a little more privacy. He ordered a coffee and waited, wondering what horrors awaited him.

As Lee entered the deli Roger's first impression was that she looked gaunt. She was a good twenty pounds lighter that when they had been in court just over a year ago. Other than that she looked as beautiful as she ever. He stood when she came to the table but didn't embrace her.

"Lee."

"Roger, thanks for agreeing to meet me."

"Why now? It's been over a year since our divorce and we barely spoke a friendly word to each other for a year before that. What is it you want?"

"I ran into Ann Cleave at a coffee shop the other day."

"And you're still alive?"

"Yes, she was actually decent to me. I didn't know she had left Coopers."

"That woman saved my ass by leaving. The rumours died down shortly after she left."

"Roger, I now know that you didn't have an affair with her. She told me about everything. She explained away my flimsy evidence and I believed her. I am so sorry I didn't believe you."

"So all the heartache for both of us was totally unnecessary. Why do you believe her but you didn't believe me?

"Because I thought you were covering up your cheating, whereas a year after our divorce, Ann has no reason to lie or hide. I am sorry I didn't believe you. I am sorry for the pain and expense I have put you though. I wish it had never happened."

She began to tear up. This was hard for her.

This was equally painful to Roger.

"Lee, you know I loved you. Your filing for divorce nearly killed me. Your accusations stung and still sting today. I am glad you realize how wrong you were, but there has been so much damage done."

"If I could undo it all you know I would. We had something special and my insecurities ruined it for both of us."

"Did you find someone after the divorce Lee?"

"I dated but it was awful. How about you?"

"No, I was too damaged by the divorce. It was like I gave off a stink that repelled women."

"Did you buy a house?

"No, I am renting a bachelor apartment. You must still be in our old house."

"Yes, but I...it doesn't feel right."

"Really? Why?"

"I got that house through the divorce, a divorce that was based on the false accusations that you were cheating on me. Now that I know the truth, I am thinking that maybe you deserve to have your house back."

"What? That doesn't make a lot of sense Lee."

"Sure it does. I got the house you had to give up. It is only fair that you get it back. Call it restitution. I will also have my lawyer stop the alimony."

"You are crazy. Your lawyer will have a fit."

"Roger, I need to make it up to you. Please let me make it up to you by giving you your home back. I will swap you for the bachelor apartment."

"You wouldn't like the apartment. It is small, rundown and in a shitty area of town. I appreciate the sentiment but I can't take your home away from you."

" I want to make up for all the pain I have caused you. Would it be possible to come over to the house for dinner? I just want to talk. How about dinner this Saturday?"

"Ummm, I guess so. This is weird. Saturday is ok."

Roger was stunned and confused. Where was the raving, lunatic bitch that he had come to despise? Why the massive shift? Was it only guilt for ending their marriage or something else? He had loved her so much back then.

Lee came away from the meeting feeling optimistic. Roger didn't reject her, he even accepted her dinner invitation. She wanted him to know how badly she felt that she had caused him so much pain.

The dinner invitation was a shocker for Roger. It came out of left field. He hadn't been in the house for a year and a half. Would it feel like home?

The meal was wonderful. Lee was a talented cook. Roger had encouraged her to follow up on her gift but she was reluctant to pursue it as a career. They relaxed after the meal with a coffee.

Roger loved this old house. He hated to give it up in the divorce but it was a necessary sacrifice. She had made no changes to the place and the familiarity was bringing back some happy memories.

"Lee, that was an incredible meal. You really missed your calling."

"Thanks Roger, I appreciate the compliment. I do love to cook but haven't had anyone to cook for for so long. It is nice to have you back in the house again. This is where you belong. Please move here and I'll take your apartment."

"You are not going anywhere Lee. This is your home."

"It just seems wrong that you lost this home because I misread the tea leaves and accused you of something terrible. I know this may sound insane, given our difficulties, but I love you Roger. I miss you, and I am guilt ridden over how I fucked up a perfectly wonderful marriage to the man of my dreams. This may seem a bad time to ask but I have three favours I would ask of you."

"First, would you forgive me for being a fool and ruining our relationship?

Second, would you please feel free to come to this house and treat it as your own? If you won't take it back from me you should at least be free to use it as you want.

Third, would you please allow me back into your life in a limited way? I don't deserve any kind of relationship with you but I want it desperately. "

"Lee, I am still pretty much in shock over your 180 degree turnaround. You went from hating my guts to wanting me to be your friend. That is a hell of a lot to take in and process. That said, let me tentatively answer your requests.

"First, of course I can forgive you, but I can't forget the mistrust you had in me. I don't know that I will ever get over that."

"Second, you won the house through the divorce fair and square. Your lawyer did a fine job skinning me alive. With my apartment, I don't need to use the house. There are good memories here but also some horrible memories of all the allegations and fights. I do appreciate your offer though."

"Third, I don't know. I loved you once. I probably still harbour feelings for you, but you have hurt me so badly that I am loathe to invite you you back into my life in any official capacity. Still, meeting once in a while for a meal or even a coffee would be nice."

Lee smiled at her ex husband.

"Thank you. That is all could ask of you. You just said you used to love me and you still have feelings. So do I."

"Let me put the leftovers in the fridge and clean up the kitchen a little."

"I'll help."

Roger followed his ex out to the kitchen. He couldn't help but notice the blue silk dress she wore. It was one he bought for her. It was loose on her after her weight loss but he still appreciated the view of her butt as she walked ahead of him. She was a beautiful woman.

"You have lost quite a bit of weight Lee."

"I haven't had much appetite for the past year or so. I think tonight is the first good meal I have been able to eat. The stress of the divorce, the feeling of betrayal and the loneliness aren't healthy."

"The divorce was your idea you know."

"I know, it was a self inflicted wound, an own goal. I have been beating myself up over it."

"You need to get healthy again. If my forgiveness helps you to heal, then I offer it without reservation."

"You are a good man Roger."

The two ex lovers put the food away and they began to wash the pots, pans, and dishes. In the middle of the cleaning Roger and Lee both felt the comfortable domesticity of the situation. For a moment it felt like old times and it felt warm and right.

"Ahh, my nose itches!" cried Lee with her gloved hands submerged in the soapy water.

Roger stepped in front of her and scratched her nose. She gave out a laugh but was shocked when Roger kissed the end of her nose. He immediately felt the awkwardness of the moment and turned back to drying the dishes.

"I'm sorry Lee, it just...it just felt right."

"Don't apologize, it felt nice."

With the dishes done, Roger begged off and drove back to his apartment. He fell back into his old husband mode so easily that it scared him. It felt so good and so right and yet it felt unreal and almost taboo. The two exchanged texts frequently over the next few weeks. Three weeks after their dinner at the house, Roger asked if she would like to join him for a dinner at a restaurant.

Lee felt that their dinner date at the house went well. She was beginning to feel the animosity between them dissolve. She was encouraged that maybe they could at least be friends.

When Roger asked her out to a dinner date she was ecstatic.

Roger picked the restaurant, the one in the Place Desire Hotel. He knew this would be a risk since this was where she suspected he had taken Ann.

For this special occasion Lee had purchased a new little black dress and a new pair of heels. She had dropped so much weight she was a good two sizes down. The dress hugged her curves. While it complemented her figure, it was by no means risqué.

Roger looked debonair in a dark blue suit. They drank cocktails and laughed and caught up with each other. They had crab legs and lobster tails. The meal was outstanding. They had another cocktail after the meal and then coffee.

"Have you given any more thoughts to the last of my three requests?"

The third favour was whether you could have a place in my life. You and I can be friends but we must remember we are also ex spouses. That said, I have really enjoyed tonight. I want to do it again, soon."

"Thanks, I have had a wonderful time too. Let's not get too hung up on labels. Let's just enjoy what we have."

The drive back to Lee's home was a short one. She asked if he would like to come in but Roger declined, claiming he needed to get to bed because of an early morning meeting. It was a lie. He feared they would have another drink and they just might end up in bed together and he feared that sex might kill whatever friendship they had recovered.

Lee was disappointed that he wouldn't come in but she understood. They had too much to drink and she presumed too much. Hopefully there would be other times.

Roger was frustrated that he had allowed Lee back into his life so easily and also frustrated because after that great evening together he wanted her badly. He resisted contact with her for the rest of the week.

Lee texted Ann, wondering if she would like to meet again for coffee. Ann agreed so they met the next day.

Lee thanked Ann for setting her straight about her non affair with Roger. Ann was thrilled that Lee had reached out to Roger but warned her not to press him too hard because she had wounded him pretty deeply. Lee agreed, but she also confessed that she wanted Roger to fall in love with her again but acknowledged that it would take time.

As the pair were leaving the coffee shop they were surprised to see Roger walking into a restaurant across the street and he wasn't alone. Lee stopped dead in her tracks and Ann put her hand on Lee's shoulder.

"Don't let that worry you, and for God's sake don't go in there. Talk to him later, okay?"

"Yeah, do you know who she is?"

"No, not a clue. Just don't freak out. Let him tell you."

That night, after dinner Lee phoned him.

"Hey Roger, I was downtown this afternoon and I saw you and a friend going into a restaurant on King St. I was having a coffee with Ann."

"What a coincidence. You should have come and said hello."

"Who was that you were with?"

"Janice Kent. One of my friends set us up with a blind date a week ago. She is quite an interesting person, you would like her."

"I thought you said you weren't dating anyone."

"I wasn't at the time. It is just that some of my friends have made a habit of introducing me to women they think I might like. Janice is a journalist, she has been in war zones for the last few years."

"I guess you can't blame me for getting a little jealous."

"Lee, we agreed to be friends. I don't think having a romantic relationship with an ex is a good idea. We certainly never talked about an exclusive relationship and I'm not sure we should."

"You're partially right. We never discussed it but I think we should. The past six months have been so good. I have loved being close with you. I don't want to lose you again. When I saw you with Janice I felt like I had been gut shot."

"Lee, you can't expect to simply apologize and erase the year and half of suffering we went though. I am not your husband anymore. I want to have you in my life but not as a wife, you ended that yourself."

"Do you expect me to be satisfied with being your friend while you romance Janice? How do you think that makes me feel?"

"You didn't give a shit how I felt when you accused me of fucking Ann behind your back, or when you and your lawyer eviscerated me in the divorce. I have forgiven you but you can't expect me to stop living my life for you. You gave up the right to be with me when you sued for divorce. I am sorry if my dating Janice offends you but I will continue to do so if it pleases me."

"I get it. I really do but I really thought we had a chance."

"We did once, but you ended it with the divorce. Don't give up on our friendship. I will always love you but that love is tainted by your lack of trust."

At that moment in time Lee and Roger finally agreed on something, both of them knew that a fresh wound had been opened.

They ended their conversation, both of them frustrated and close to tears

Roger didn't really think that Janice was such a great match for him. As a journalist, and an extremely attractive person, she was a natural for the national networks. Like so many media personalities she had a huge ego which required feeding. So why did he let on to Lee that he wanted to continue dating Janice? He realized that he was using Janice as a defence mechanism against Lee. By letting on that he was more enamoured with Janice he got Lee to openly admit that she wanted more than a friendship. This left Roger with a simple choice, do I or don't I want a romantic connection with Lee.

Lee was angry that Roger was getting more involved with Janice. She knew she had an uphill battle, especially since she admitted that a simple friendship was not enough for her.

Strategy was all important now, too aggressive and she could drive him away, too passive and he could move on. She had to tread softly, so she waited. Her hope was that Roger would call her first. He didn't call that week. Half way through the second week she broke down and sent a text.

"Hey stranger, what is up? Haven't heard from you."

The reply came three hours later.

"Nothing much. Work has been crazy. Janice is back covering a war. Coffee sometime?"

"Let's make it supper at the house. Tomorrow?"