Devi 2

Dear Readers,

Originally, I naively posted this story in Loving Wives (those of you who are familiar with the category will understand what I mean). I've asked to have it moved here, because while it isn't a typical romance, it is still a love story. I hope you will enjoy it.

You will find a list of the Hindi words used in the story along with their meanings at the end.

Subdued_Passion

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DEVI

She sat in the darkness, eyes unfocussed and blank staring at nothing. She sat in the darkness not because it soothed her with its quiet. No. She sat engulfed in darkness because she hadn't even noticed that the day had changed to night.

It had been hours since the men had returned from 'the place'. She couldn't bring herself to call it what it was because she couldn't yet accept any of it as being real. She couldn't, wouldn't focus on anything that was happening because it wasn't real, not to her, not yet.

She wasn't ready, but the chanting of the priests was a reminder that was hard to ignore. They were praying for a soul that had already escaped this world while hers lay trapped, fluttering around like a caged bird desperate for release. She wished she could just pay them and send them off. But, this was ritual and it had to be done every day for the next twelve days or the gods would not be pleased.

But, how could the gods be pleased to make her suffer like this. No, she wasn't ready and it felt like the darkness was swallowing her. She felt cold, except in her mind, where it was bright and where she could still bask in the warmth of his smile.

Him!

The thought pierced through the heart as much as any earthly dagger could. She had nowhere else to go but further inside, within herself, the only place HE could be found anymore.

-----

The marriage feast was a grand display. Munishiji's only son was getting married and no expense was spared. The maharaj ran the rasoi no different than any great wartime general. The guests barely sampled one delicacy when the servers arrived with even more tempting treats. Joy seemed to overflow throughout the household much like the bellies of the guests. But somewhere in the midst of all this gaiety a solitary spirit felt like it was experiencing a slow death even while the body that housed it forced its lips into a smile.

This is it. The day has come. It has happened.

So, why can you just not accept it?

You knew this day would come. You've been prepared all your life for this. You knew what your future held, so why can't you just accept it?

Because I'd rather die.

The realisation startled Devi enough to jerk her head up a bit which in turn was enough to cause her ghunghat to slip off her head by an inch. Only an inch, but it was enough to afford her a glimpse of the sleeve of his sherwani. She noticed the zardozi embroidery on the cuff- it looked nice. It wasn't garish like she had come to expect most wedding suits to be. She looked at the hand that emerged partially from the sleeve. It looked like, well... a hand. There wasn't anything significant or noteworthy. It wasn't more hairy or sunburnt than any other man. It didn't have scars or any other identifying marks on it. There was absolutely nothing special about this hand, except, well... except that this was her husband's hand.

Husband.

The word seemed to almost detonate inside her head. Her shoulders felt with the impact. And then, almost as if the hand had a mind of its own, it approached her.

Had it seen her watching it?

That's silly. It's just a hand.

And then, a slight squeeze.

The hand had taken a hold of her own and given it a light squeeze. It was such a little gesture but it comforted her. She couldn't understand why, but suddenly it felt like things were not as desperate as she imagined them to be. Encouraged by the speck of hope, she tilted her head slightly and looked up. He must've been watching her the entire time and waiting for her to look up. Or maybe she was moving in slow motion. Because, no sooner did she lift up her gaze that she was met with a smile. And there it was, bright and warm and welcoming. He looked... happy.

Genuinely happy.

She couldn't understand how they could feel so differently about the same situation but looking at the way he was looking at her, she couldn't help but smile back; not the kind of smile she had flashed at every enthusiastic guest that had shaken her hand in congratulations that day. No. This smile was different because now she had hope.

-----

"Devi?"

"Devi beta..."

"Don't," she interrupted her mother before she could complete whatever commands she had come to issue this time.

"Just don't call me that."

She felt powerless over her own life. A goddess should have more control over her own destiny, she thought to herself. Why my parents would name me goddess if they never planned to allow me to manage the reins of my own life, was a question she often asked herself.

Devi's mother didn't ask what she meant. She didn't need to. This wasn't the first she'd seen Devi act out in this manner. She knew her daughter harboured some kind of silly hope that she would always be with her parents and Devi's father would have likely allowed it too if not for their recent misfortunes. Devi's parents hadn't let on how much of a financial setback they had really suffered. Munishiji proposal to have his son marry Devi had come at an opportune moment as a connection with his family would help Devi's father establish a credit line within the business community which in turn would help them get back on their feet again. An even greater boon was that the would-be-groom was already well known within their circles as a respectable man.

Her mother knew that she had dreams that were different from the other girls in her community but she also knew that as stubborn as her daughter could be she was also a string woman who could adapt to any challenging situation. And marriage was no challenge. Millions of people have done it before us, she told herself. Devi will find happiness, eventually, as it has been arranged.

-----

The sunlight crept in through the partially closed curtains. Shadows flung to the corners of the room as the sunbeams bathed her bared legs. She felt their warmth on her legs but that was not why she was awake. She had taken to sleeping without her clothes. It was just more... convenient that way. She knew it was naughty and it would be considered scandalous if it was ever found out. So she made sure that she was dressed before any of the maids entered the room in the morning with her cup of chai. Fortunately she still had time, which was good because she could feel a warm tingle beginning to rise from her womanly core.

He was there beside her.

Asleep.

His breathing sounded even and rhythmic, listening to it could be very calming. But, not right now. Not when what she wanted, was to be thoroughly roused.

She turned from her side of the bed, the right side- he let her choose her side of the bed, just like so many other things that he let her choose for herself- to face him.

He lay on his back. She watched his chest rise and fall with the rhythm of his breathing. He wasn't the image of masculinity young women fantasized about when they think of their future husbands. He wasn't muscular and swarthy with a thick coat of hair on his chest. He wasn't any of those things but, he was hers. And with him, she could be herself. She felt herself grow moist at the thought.

Enough dawdling. It's time to play.

She lowered the sheet to expose his manhood. She looked at it possessively. This is the organ that would facilitate their union, how they would be joined and achieve mutual bliss. This was her lingam to worship as she pleased. But first she needed to gain its attention.

She gave the sheet a hard yank and tossed it off the bed. He stirred a little probably missing the warmth.

No problem, I'll have you warm soon enough.

She climbed on top of him, straddling his hips, yet making sure that she didn't lower herself on to him. His hips were so much narrower than his chest that from this angle he did look rather broad of chest and well built. She sighed longingly.

Time to wake up husband.

Devi planted her palms on the bed on either side of him and lowered her mouth to his left nipple, which she gave a generous lick.

He didn't move but she felt his cock twitch and almost make contact with her nether lips.

She lowered her mouth to his right nipple and gave it the same treatment as its twin. She stayed still in that position for a minute. Her breasts pressed against his belly and her own nipples hardening with excitement.

Slowly, while staying low, she dragged her breasts up his chest till only their nipples were touching each other. She could feel the heat rising from his cock now.

So you're going to pretend to be asleep, husband? Okay, have it your way then.

She lowered herself so that her wet slit could make contact with his hard cock. And then she began to roll her hips forward and backward, rubbing her wet slit along his cock, while the stimulation left her wetter still.

She had been a virgin till her marriage. She had read books which had explained things in pornographic details. But she'd never imagined that the things described could be like...

This!

She continued the sawing motion, making sure the head of his cock bumped against her clit as the, now familiar, pressure build within her core. She hastened her movements lost in the pursuit of her own pleasure. Wantonly she reached up to her nipples and pinched them while her hips continued their frenzied action.

So close, I'm there. Almost...

"Ah ah ah uh ungh ungh aaaaaaaah!" She shouted as she shattered.

Through heavy lidded eyes Devi's saw that her husband had given up all pretence of sleep as he watched her, wide eyed.

She looked into his eyes and smiled while reaching down to touch herself. She raised her hips so he could watch her collect her come with her index finger before she proceeded to suck on it like she was feasting on the nectar of the gods.

"Devi," he groaned.

Devi had surprised herself as much as she had her husband. She enjoyed these moments of exploration which seemed to add to both their pleasures.

"Yes husband?"

"Don't you, yes husband me, you imp. You know what you're doing to me."

"I do?" She asked innocently while reaching for his balls and giving them a gentle squeeze.

"Aaaah!" He moaned.

Done now with playing, she decided it was time to please him. She dragged herself lower down his body while he eyed her expectantly. She knew how much he loved when she did this. She licked her lips and lowered her mouth to engulf the head of his cock. She never broke eye contact with him during moments like these. She was making love to him and she didn't plan to miss out on any of his responses.

He clenched his fists at his sides. She knew he wanted to grab a hold of her head to position her, but he wouldn't do that. He wouldn't try to control her, not in any way. She was free, as in all other things since she married him, she was free to move as she pleased.

Devi continued to suck on the spongy head of the cock while letting her spittle dribble down its length. She couldn't imagine something like this to be a pretty sight, but, the expression on her husband's face said otherwise.

Slowly she rubbed her fingers along the exposed length of his shaft while continuing the sucking motion with her mouth. She knew he wouldn't last long, if she sucked too fast so she paced herself. When she could resist it no longer she swirled her tongue along the ridge before sticking the pointy end of her tongue into his pee-hole making him jump up in bed. She giggled as swallowed his cock a little further into her mouth. And the way his cock repeatedly twitched told her that he liked that. She made a mental note of it for the next time they would play.

Finally feeling that she had teased him long enough, Devi began bobbing her head up and down her husband's cock in earnest, while stroking the base of it with her fingers.

He had told her that his cock was pretty average in size compared to other men but she found that hard to believe because in her little hands it always felt so...

thick

, she thought to herself.

She watched as her husband fisted the sheet beneath him and closed his eyes. He was close.

"Unghungh unghungh ungh ungh ungh..."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah."

When he finally calmed down and opened his eyes, Devi looked at him and very quietly said.

"I love you."

-----

It was the seventh day and like all the days so far, Devi could hear the chanting of the priests in the courtyard. It was the first day that she had allowed the maids into their bedroom; just her bedroom now. She even drank the tea they left her. Everyone had worried about her when she had refused to take any meals after his death. She had no idea how she had survived for so many days without eating or drinking. She had no recollection of any of the events of the last week of her life. The only memory that had now taken firmly root in her mind was of her reading the letter, his letter, addressed to her- the few words written neatly on a simple parchment of paper still danced before her eyes.

My Dear Devi,

This is going to be your first birthday since we started our married life together and I thought I ought to mark the occasion by doing something special for you.

Even though you've never actually said it, I've gleaned from our conversations that you would have liked to become an engineer but was never given the choice to do so. As your birthday gift I'd like to be able to give you that choice.

I have started a savings account in your name with enough money for you to pursue an engineering degree if you choose to do so.

I know our families will find it hard to accept this. But I believe I will be able to persuade them if you continue to perform your wifely "duties" with the same enthusiasm as you have so far.

Your loving husband,

........................

She wasn't aware she was crying till she noticed that some of the errant teardrops had stained the paper and blotted out his name. She wept heartily, the tears spilling forth like water from a damn that had finally burst, releasing all the hurt and pain it had held within it till then; once again he had given her hope.

She approached the window. A mild breeze played with the curtains. The sunrays seemed to be unaware of the sad atmosphere within the household as they bounced into the room dissipating the gloom. She stretched her hand out forward, towards the light. She could feel the warmth of the sun. She stood like that for a moment as if considering something and then stepped out of the shadows.

---x-x-x---

Thank you for reading. As always, I look forward to your feedback. Please find below a translation for the Hindi terms used in the story.

Devi- goddess

Sherwani- long coat like garment, worn by men

Maharaj- title given to a head cook

Rasoi- kitchen

Ghunghat- a headscarf worn to veil the face

Zardozi- type of embroidery usually done with gold string

Chai- tea

Lingam- phallus; usually a phallic object worshipped by women as a symbol of Lord Shiva