Cuttin Loose

"So where is Dave taking you tonight for your birthday?" Lois asked excitedly, sounding like many older married women do when asking about a younger single woman's plans for the evening.

"He's not," Tina replied sounding kind of disgusted. "Didn't I tell you?"

I pulled my face out of the computer screen and leaned back in my chair to latch onto the conversation between these best work friends. As the only man working in a department of women I always found their conversations interesting and informative.

"I thought he was taking you someplace special," Lois said, her voice dripping with disappointment.

"Can you believe this?" Tina replied dejectedly. "He calls me up Wednesday night and says that he has a family obligation tonight and can't make it. A funeral in Toledo of all places and he won't be back until late."

"He didn't ask if you wanted to go along or something?" Lois asked.

"Nope, so it looks like it's going to be a Blockbuster night," Tina admitted with a big sigh.

Finally compelled to put in my two cents worth, I pushed back from my desk so I could see them through the doorway to my cubicle.

"At least he didn't say that he had to stay at home and wash his hair," I cracked.

"Oh, Greg," Lois giggled, but Tina looked back at me with her big dark sorrowful eyes.

"I could almost believe that one seeing the way he's been acting lately," she confessed.

"So do you have a Plan B?" I asked, getting up from my chair and standing by the doorway. I could see the two of them closely now sitting at their adjoining desks.

"Like I just said, Blockbuster or bust," Tina answered, shrugging her shoulders.

There was nothing worse than a beautiful woman being left at home on her birthday because some punk didn't know his ass from a hole in the ground. I've never understood some of my brothers who treat women poorly. I don't believe in the pedestal thing, but then I do believe in treating people with respect, especially women.

"Man, that's cold," I said, realizing my opportunity. "I'll tell you what, Tina. If you don't have any other plans, I'll take you out tonight."

Lois looked over at her younger friend with a big smile and nodded her head.

"Hell, your birthday comes only once a year," I went on. "It's the least I can do."

"But it's such short notice. I don't know," Tina said with a little giggle. She paused for a moment looking first at Lois then at me. Suddenly she made her mind up and smiled. "Sure. Why not?"

"All right," Lois said clapping her hands together.

"Gee," Tina said, looking perhaps surprised.

"Gee, what?" I asked.

"Gee, I didn't think that consultants were allowed to date their clients," Tina replied.

"We're not. But I work for your boss and she is definitely not my type."

"Well, okay then," Tina answered.

"How about I can pick you up about six thirty?"

"Okay," she replied. Then a sly little smile crossed her face. "Now I can wear that cute little black dress I just bought."

I could only smile at the thought of seeing her in the lovely little black dress again. It's a long story of how we got to this point so let me explain. You see I'm a hired gun; a business consultant brought in to help comapnies out of a jam. As part of a medical review group for a major insurance organization they had to meet some new government reporting requirements and had no idea where to turn. I had spent a couple of months helping them revamp their computer system.

Little had I known when the account executive brought me in that I'd be working as the only male in a group of about thirty women, nurses at that. Although the thought was quite appealing at first, the very professional all-business atmosphere kept the assignment from resembling fun and games. I was a bit disappointed since we all have had fantasies about doctors or nurses and the business office setting removed much of the luster; there were no white uniforms or gaping hospital gowns nor any helpless patients at the whim of the medical staff. I remembered the first day when their manager had gathered the staff together to introduce me and ask them for their complete cooperation.

"What sort of cooperation?" Tina had asked with a sly smile, looking me up and down.

"He'll be wanting to look at our computer system, how we enter, access, and retrieve data, make-up special reports," Christine had said. "That sort of thing."

"Oh," Tina replied. "Can he do me first?"

As the other nurses giggled and tittered, I noted the nameplate sitting on her desk, Tina Valerio. She was younger than the rest, perhaps in her twenties whereas the rest were probably in the thirty-five and up club. She had thick shoulder length black hair that she wore with long bangs that fell down into her eyes. Her eyeglasses were large and unstylish and the rest of her seemed swallowed up by an oversized business suit.

"Well, I always like to save the best for last," I quipped with a polite smile. "But in this case I may have to make an exception."

There were more giggles and chuckles and the gal next to Tina gave her a little tap on the shoulder. I couldn't help but notice the growing blush in her cheeks. I laughed along but took note of their reactions, an important part of the job when consulting. I was given a desk next door to the manager and settled in to start my review. The department had recently been consolidated and the nurses were shuffling around to new desk assignments.

"I've always wanted a window seat," remarked one of the older nurses who had moved next to a bank of windows. "And now I've got one!"

"Actually, I like the view from my seat just fine," said Tina as she plopped down into her new seat.

I looked over from my new desk and could see her swiveling back and forth in her chair, directly in my line of sight, with a cute smile on her face. When I glanced over later on, I caught a glimpse of Tina bending over to unpack the last of her stuff and couldn't help but notice the curves hidden in the drape of her slacks. Without her jacket, I could see the nice round curves of her breasts. When she stood back up, she noticed my admiring gaze and combed her hand through her dark hair, pulling it back from her face. Even behind the protection of her eyeglasses and despite the flush of her cheeks, there was a glimmer of beauty in her face. She had a slender frame with narrow shoulders and waist but a delightful curving flare to her hips. Why was she hiding herself from the world, I asked myself. We smiled awkwardly and went on silently with what we were doing.

The next morning, I was unpacking my survival kit, a box of stuff that I took from job to job, including accessories for my laptop, some office supplies, and a picture of my kids. I had just set it down on my desk when a cheerful voice called out to me.

"Excuse me, Greg," said Tina, who was standing at the doorway to my new cube. "Chris said you wanted to meet with me this morning."

"Ah, yeah," I replied. "Anytime you're ready. I reviewed the manual yesterday, but would really like to see how it really gets done."

"Well, that book is a joke, really," she laughed stepping into my cube. "There's a lot we do that isn't in there. They've added some shortcuts and other things that are documented."

"Great," I said, watching as she picked up the picture. She was dressed in a bulky dark business suit. She was much shorter than I and seemed to be hiding behind her dark hair and eyeglasses.

"Are these your kids?" she asked looking at the picture closely.

"Yeah, my inspiration," I remarked, pulling out an old souvenir coffee mug from Jamaica. "They're what keeps me going."

"Cute kids," she commented, setting the picture back down carefully. "Is there a Mrs. Greg?"

"There was," I admitted. "We divorced a couple of years ago."

"I'm sorry to hear that," she said. "It seems these days that people just give up instead of trying to work out their problems."

"If it makes any difference, it wasn't my idea," I confessed, stuffing a bag of laptop accessories into an open drawer. "She said she needed to find her space, whatever that means. It's funny that you think you know someone, but then when the chips are down you really don't them at all."

As Tina stood beside me, I tried to look her over and gauge her reaction. She seemed to be doing the same with me, peering up at me through her glasses with her dark eyes. I could certainly see the Mediterranean heritage in her face, but there was something else, maybe Latin. She was difficult to type; the needle on the looks meter kept moving. As I sized her up, it seemed funny to me as I thought about how we must have looked, both of us in our professional business suits, checking each other out. The look she was returning felt a bit uncomfortable. I'm sure she could see that I was older, perhaps much older than she, but what did she really see, what was she really looking at?

We spent the rest of the morning reviewing their procedures. She sat at the terminal and began showing me the basic procedures, pointing out the things that hadn't been documented. As she worked the keys, I noticed how small and delicate her hands were, with slim fingers each topped with long dark polished nails. I also noticed that her cheeks were flushed. Sure, I could say it was the excitement of working with me, but there was something else. What was it about her that I couldn't put my hand on? Was that an undercurrent of feeling beneath the crisp business suit and eyeglasses, or was I reading something into the situation? At one point, when she had a problem demonstrating a particular procedure, she paused and banged her palms on the keyboard.

"Dammit!" she said in a voice far removed from her normal polite professional manner. "This is just one of the problems we have!"

She pulled off her glasses and rubbed the bridge of her nose. Then she looked at me and our eyes met again, this time without the protection of her eyeglasses. Her eyes were beautiful, like large dark pools that were inviting me to take a swim. I could begin to see the layers of emotion that were running deep within her. She reached up to brush her black hair from her eyes; her cheeks were still flushed a bit. She slid her glasses back on.

"Well, good!" I said. "These are the kinds of things that I need to see to get a good feel for what needs to get done."

Later on, when we paused so she could take a break with her friend Lois, I was left in my cube with a warm, jittery, nervous feeling inside. My palms were sweaty and I fidgeted with a pencil. Maybe it was just the excitement of starting on a new assignment. Even though I had been consulting for a few years, there was always some apprehension each time I started at a new place so I shoved it to the back of my mind.

The following week proved to be the most interesting of my assignment. I was able to make some progress in laying out the code for the new program; my close proximity to the nurses gave me great insight into their personalities. On more than one occasion, I thought to myself that they surely must know that I could hear most of what they were saying. Even though I was in my cube, their voices would easily carry over the partition. Maybe they wanted me to hear, but then, maybe I didn't want to hear. One was having marital problems and was constantly on the phone with her renegade husband. Another was conducting business for her part-time job while at work. And when Tina and Lois talked during a break, I could have sworn that it was as much for my entertainment.

Although I was never one to try and eavesdrop, I couldn't help but pick up details of Tina's life. She was still single, had just moved into her own place, and was a kidney disease specialist. She had tired of the long hours of regular nursing and was happy to be putting her knowledge and experience to use without the downside. She had a pack of friends that she hung out with, but they were all getting married and she was the last single one. With her younger sister's wedding coming up later in the year, she was beginning to worry that she might never make that big trip down the aisle. Although I tried to conceal the fact that I could hear everything they talked about, I finally couldn't help it. One afternoon, Tina sighed and got up from her desk to walk over toward the windows.

"The elastic in these slacks is so old, I can't feel it," she sighed. "It feels like I don't have anything on at all."

Without a second thought about blowing my cover, I rolled my chair over and leaned out around the corner.

"Oh, really?" I cracked impulsively. "I think I'd better look into that!"

Surprised by me comment, Tina turned and put her hands on her hips. The others who heard began to snicker and chuckle. Tina's cheeks were flushed again and she looked about as if ready to say something. Lois winked in my direction and I just shrugged my shoulders and pushed my chair back to work.

A week or two later, I had gotten out of a meeting and was heading off to a late lunch when I literally ran into Tina as she was coming out of the ladies room.

"Sorry," I said as I reached out my hand for her to help keep her balance. She grabbed my arm tightly as she regained her balance.

"So where are you off to?" she asked.

"Lunch actually," I said. "Meeting ran late."

"I haven't gone yet either," she said.

"Would you care to join me?" I asked out of the blue.

"I don't know," she remarked, looking around for an anxious moment or two. "Sure. Why not?"

We hustled through the warm spring rain and found a nice table over at the Golden Fleece in nearby Greektown. Just after ordering, Tina let out a big yawn.

"I'm sorry," she said meekly. "I'm just really tired today."

"Well it's that swinging single lifestyle that you lead," I said.

"Don't I wish," she replied. "That's just my problem. I don't have a lifestyle. I don't have a life."

"Come on, everybody does," I spoke, trying to be supportive.

"Sure, I live and breathe, but I just never seem to have nay fun, she sighed. "All my girl friends have a life, they have boyfriends and husbands and they go out and party and have a good time. And I'm always the one they confess to, who gives them a ride home when things don't work out."

"Don't you date?"

"Not much, lately."

"You're a nice looking woman," I said. "I don't understand why some smart fellow hasn't snatched you up by now."

"You think I'm good looking?" she asked.

"Sure, you're an attractive woman."

"Spare me, Greg," she said with a weary voice. "I know what I see when I look in the mirror. I'm short and dark and dumpy. Men want tall, blonde women with big boobs. I'm the type who just seems to disappear in the crowd."

"Whoa, right there" I said. "You are certainly not dumpy and unattractive. There may be some things you could do to make yourself more appealing."

"So what?" she said. "I should dress like a slut, like those girls in accounting the guys are always drooling over?"

"No, but I think you might want to try a more stylish look," I suggested. "Like with the glasses and hairstyle. You have those big beautiful dark eyes and you hide them behind the glasses and the bangs."

"But I'm blind without them," she said fingering the frames.

"Have you tried contacts? Or maybe a different hairstyle that shows off your pretty face?"

"I'm not pretty," she said looking down and away.

"Here," I said, reaching over and pulling her glasses from her nose. I brushed her bangs back and tucked her hair behind an ear. "There, now I can see what nice features you have. Here, look over there."

The wall next to where we were seated was lined by a series of mirrors. When she turned her head, she could see what I had and she smiled faintly. I took my hands away and she ran her hands up through her hair, holding it back from her face.

"See the nice round cheeks, the full red lips, the nice sculpted forehead? You are a very pretty woman, Tina."

"You seem to look at things differently, Greg," she said, looking back to me. "I've always had a hard time looking on the bright side."

"I've had to learn how to do it," I remarked. "It's often a part of my job as a consultant, to see what's there and come up with a plan for making it better. Sometimes I'm standing in the middle of a shitty mess and it's hard to look around and see the way out. But there always is a way, and as for you, the way seems obvious to me."

"Which is?"

"I don't exactly know for sure, but it seems like you're hiding from something. You dress in oversized clothes, you hide behind the glasses and hairdo. It's like yiou're all bound up and need to cut loose. Maybe a shopping trip with an old friend or a makeover at a nice salon," I suggested. Although she looked sort of grim at first, I could see a glimmer of hope begin to flicker in her eyes as I spoke. "You must be making good money here. Why not do something nice for yourself, to make yourself feel better and look better?"

"Could y7ou help me out?"

"Help you with what?"

"My makeover. You know, consult with me on making myself more attractive to men."

"I thought that's what girlfriends are for."

"I feel like I need a man's point of view. I never had a brother or a close male friend and to be honest, I don't really know what men like. Well, besides the obvious."

"Tina, I'm a business consultant. Cosmetic makeovers aren't on my resume."

"I know this sounds crazy," she said looking at me very intently. "But you seem different than most men I've meet. You're always so well dressed, so mature and masculine. I thought maybe you could help me, you know, from a man's perspective."

I wasn't totally surprised by her compliments, but felt a bit embarrassed.

"My specialty is in computer systems, but I guess I could consult on women's fashions. My ex-wife always said I had good taste in clothes. She never had to take anything back, well, except for that little teddy thing I got her toward the end. But that's a whole other story."

"I feel like I have to break away and go off in a new direction," she said looking off toward the restaurant counter for a moment. Her eyes took their time drifting back to me. "So will you help me?"

"What kind of a heel would I be if I said no? Sure, I'll do it!"

And the shopping excursion with Tina was only one of the things I began to think about as I drove over to pick her up at her apartment for her birthday dinner. There were other unrelated bits and pieces that kept flooding back into my mind. How we met; how we got to know each other; little things we had said. Then I remembered Lois' last comment to me before leaving work.

"Just don't let her down," Lois had said in a big sister's voice. "She really likes you, Greg."

"She does?" I had replied, surprised but pleased by the comment. "Well then, the kid gloves come on tonight," I had said, holding up both hands and waving them.

On the way home, I decided to get my old Cadillac convertible out of storage for the event. Even so, it was about a quarter after six when I stopped by Tina's place to pick her up. Knowing I was early, I paused for a moment to collect my thoughts. This should be interesting, I thought. We'll just see how this plays out. I couldn't help but whistle a tune as I strolled up the flight of stairs to her apartment. She answered the doorbell quickly and held the door wide open for me. She looked delectable in the little black dress and matching jacket. Her hair was pulled back from her face and held in a French twist with a tasteful rhinestone clip. With just a touch of makeup, she looked ravishing.

"I must admit, I'm disappointed," I told her.

A panicked look crossed her face and she reached up to pat her hair.

"Why? Do I look okay?" she asked, smoothing out the dress and looking down at the dress.