News of a death can be disturbing.
In any family it always various and sometimes, very different effects on the individuals and family members involved. Some of those affected are sad and grief stricken, some, not so much. Some, while upset, are relieved. Most however, feel love and compassion for the loss of their loved one.
Any when family and friend gather, many will reminisce and share fond memories of the happier times they spent and shared with the dearly departed.
When I heard the news of my aunt passing, my emotions were very mixed.
Of course, I felt bad for my aunt's immediate family. And I was sad for my mother. She would be laying her youngest sister to rest. Sibling loss hurts even more when you are close. And although they were in two different countries and a thousand miles apart, my aunt and mother had remained close even when they had entered into their eighties. But the loss of my aunt had a strange effect on me. As sad as it may have made me, it also made me smile. And it made me want to be where she was being laid to rest.
*****
The call came in on a Monday afternoon. My aunt Joyce had passed during the night. It was after a lengthy battle with illness. She fought hard. Her struggles and courage lasted through many battles. But in the end, it was a war she just couldn't win. Her daughter, my younger cousin, would be following her mom wishes to have her cremated. Then her ashes would be spread in multiple areas where she had grown or at one time had lived. But the ceremony, along with some ashes being tossed into the wind, would happen on Saturday, in Crystal Beach, Ontario.
Crystal Beach was and is a small town in Canada. It isn't far from the Buffalo, NY boarder. A once thriving amusement park town. It was now a shadow of the party and play community it once was. Now it is a quaint residential, retirement community on the lake. Its once thrill seeking, tourist laden, streets are now more relaxed with bars, craft breweries and hip restaurants.
I hadn't been there in over thirty years, but when I received the news, I promised my cousin that I would be there by Thursday, latest, to represent my side of the family.
*****
By chance, my grandson, Liam had been at my house when the call came in. Like every other eighteen-years old, he was on summer break. We had planned to do some fishing not far where my family lived near Arlington, but when I told him I would be driving north, he offered to come along for the ride. The idea of getting out of chores around his own home, sounded good to him.
Not being one to decline company, I accepted his generous offer and picked him up at my son's home bright and early Wednesday morning.
*****
"Liam, did you bring your passport?"
"Affirmative, sir."
"What about a dress shirt and a jacket? Never can tell how casual things like this will be."
"Check, sir."
"Cut the sir shit right about now, or I'll pull out my old credentials and have your smart ass locked up in the brig until you start school in the fall."
"Sir. Yes, sir."
My foot touched the brakes on the Yukon slowing it by about 10 miles per hour. I put my signal on and pretended to pull to the right.
"Okay. Jesus, Grandpa. I'll stop, but only to keep my sorry ass out of prison."
Liam is a good...no...he is...a great kid. He reminds me of his father, my son. And they both remind me, of me. We have so many of the same traits it is sometimes uncanny.
"So, tell me again where we're going."
"Canada. I used to spend my summers up there when I was your age."
"Sweet. Is it the place with the scary old rides you tell us about?"
"Same place."
"And if the rides were so shitty, why did you keep going back every summer."
"Not once did I tell you the rides were shitty. I told you they weren't up to the standards of what amusement parks have to offer nowadays. All the looping coasters that go faster than the speed of sound. No, these weren't like that. These rides had style. They'd scare you shitless, with style. Plus, the park wasn't the only reason I kept going back."
"Oh...let's hear it. Is Crystal Lake where you met Grandma?"
"Beach. Crystal Beach. And no. I met your grandmother at the academy. She was one of the many nurses who worked there."
"Then who was it that kept you going back?"
"An old friend."
"Tell me about her."'
"Not once did I say, 'her'. And even if it was a 'her', it's a long story."
"Longer than nine hours? Because GPS says we're more than nine hours out."
My story was one I had only told to my wife, and even then, I only told her portions of it. But for some reason, I had the need to tell someone about my summers up north. Anyone. And Liam was right beside me, so he would be the recipient. Although I would tell him my story, I knew I would only replay the graphic details in my head.
Remembering the story was not difficult. There was no need to close my eyes to see the past. No, whenever I heard the words Crystal Beach, or my aunt Joyce's name, the memories flowed into brain giving me a dopamine rush and an overload of joy in my heart. For it was there, a small town in Canada, that I met the love of my life.
*****
My uncle Jack picked me up at the Buffalo bus station. On June 30
th
. It would be my first time in Canada in a few years.
I remember it clearly because I was pissed at missing the Fourth of July party my baseball team would be hosting, but my mother promised I was in for a treat. Canada had some kind of party of their own. On July 1
st
. And because so many Americans lived along the lake in Crystal Beach, they also celebrated July 4
th
. She said it would be a double party. As reluctant as I was to go up to Canada, I was happy that I did. It was there that I met the love of my life. A girl a knew I would eventually marry.
The station wagon he picked me up in was the size of a bus. A Mercury Marquise. Pure seventies magic. It was so smooth it glided and floated down the highway. And without moving the wheel, it swayed from side to side. Almost like it was trying to put you to sleep.
Their home was on Alexandra Rd. I clearly remember how odd it was. Small front yard. With a front porch that was very close to the street. But with a large, tree filled backyard. I also found it funny how in those days, no one used their backyards. They all sat on their front porches.
It was strange I would be spending my summer with them, because they barely had enough room for themselves. They were four people living in a two-bedroom house, but they had a very cool back porch. It was screened in to keep the bugs out and it had a large overhanging roof to keep out the sun and rain. It was to be my home until late-August. My first ever summer away from home.
*****
"Love of your life? Wow, did Grandma ever know about this...this girl?"
"Jeri. Yeah. I told your grandmother all about her. And that Jeri once saved my life. Literally."
"How?"
"I swallowed too much lake water, and Jeri thought I was drowning. As she tells it...she saved my life."
"Did she?"
"No."
"What did Grandma think of it?"
"Well, she thought I should try to reconnect with Jeri. Reach out or look her up on Facebook. When Grandma was dying, she made me promise I would."
"Did you."
"No. I couldn't bring myself to do it."
"Seems a shame. Who knows Pops. Maybe she's out there waiting for you."
"Can I continue?"
"Please do." My grandson said with a sarcastic little laugh in his voice.