Charlie's Guide to Life

"Come on. Just go on one date. What could it hurt?" Stevie questioned for the twentieth time that night.

It could hurt a lot. I'd learned my lesson earlier that year, which had prompted my decision to take a dating sabbatical. I'd always been the girl that never settled down, never had a boyfriend. And I was pretty proud of that too. But as they say: never say never. I fell for a guy and fell hard. No one quite got it. Whenever Lex got the chance, she would remind me that it was only three months. Three months to her was a lifetime to me. She was a serial dater and a serial cheater at that. I spent every day for nearly three months with a boy. I let him in and I got hurt. Big time.

"Oh well, she wouldn't want her heart to get broken like last time." Lexie laughed.

My mind drifted back to the last night I had spent time with Macon. He had worked all night and was completely exhausted. We just took a nap—his arms around me. Him telling me that I was amazing, begging me not to leave. If only I had stayed—stayed a few more minutes, a few more hours.

"Charlie...Charlie! Earth to Charlotte..." Stevie shouted.

"What?" I yelped. I knew my eyes would give me away.

"She was daydreaming about HIM again." Lex huffed.

"Seriously Charl, it's been 6 months. He's long gone." Stevie not so subtly reminded me. "Just go on the date."

"FINE." I knew that they were never going to let it go.

"Finally. He's a nurse. He's hot. What more could you ask for?"

"Thanks Lex. You're right. What more could I ask for?"

But I knew exactly what more I could ask for—someone I'd never have again.

"Yeah Lex. What more could she ask for? Ohhh, I know. Macon."

"Thanks guys. I appreciate the sympathy."

The fact of the matter was that I was over Macon. Yeah, sometimes I still missed him. On the rare occasion, I had a few what if thoughts. Mostly it just left me cynical. I really couldn't understand the concept that everyone was so adamant about: Your heart will be broken many times before you find your "true love." I basically thought it was a bunch of bullshit. Why would I knowingly put myself through pain? Uhh...I wouldn't, hence my decision not to date.

"You've got to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince." Stevie felt the need to remind me.

"I said okay. What more do you want from me?"

"Well you two can argue about this all night long. I HAVE to get home." Lexie said as she hugged us and left our place. Stevie and I had been roommates for the past 4 months.

"Now, what I want from you...I want you to give this a shot. I want you to stop being afraid of getting hurt. Never finding love is just as bad as being hurt a few times. I just want you to give this guy ONE shot. Just really try and be open. It's been six months. You've taken your goofy-ass 'sabbatical.' Stop being afraid to live, K?"

"One date. One shot. Then I can have as long a break as I want. Alright?"

"Fine. His name is Cooper. You have a date with him Saturday night."

"As in TOMORROW night??"

"Yes ma'am."

Tomorrow came way too soon. Stevie helped me get ready but wouldn't tell me where the date was. I had more butterflies than I had expected considering I thought I had turned cold-hearted. Cooper showed up promptly at 7:00. I opened the door and was floored. He was gorgeous. If Stevie hadn't been behind me, I would have turned and ran. I knew I was in trouble from the moment I saw him.

"Hey. I'm Cooper."

"Charlie," I said shaking his hand.

"Stevie said that you were a smart one, but she failed to mention the fact that you're beautiful." I blushed.

"Thanks," I said turning to look at Stevie. She just gave me a "told you so" smirk.

"Bye Stevie," I said as I walked out the door. We walked to Cooper's car, and he even opened the door for me.

"So where are we going?" I asked as he got into the car.

"You don't waste any time, do you?"

"Well, I can't help being curious."

"You'll like it. I promise." He paused. "I had to step up my game though because apparently I only get one chance." I blushed heavily.

"Obviously Stevie can't keep her mouth shut..."

"It's okay. I like to know what I'm up against."

"Hmmm...so what do you do?"

He laughed. "Nice subject change. But I'm a nurse anesthetist at Methodist Germantown."

"Really? I hear there is a lot of money in that." I said glancing around his car as if I was acknowledging that he did indeed have a beamer.

"Yep, that's pretty much the only reason I do it—for the money." He snickered.

"Sorry, sometimes I can be a little..."

"...Aloof?"

"Okay, not exactly the word I was looking for, but I deserved that."

"No, you probably didn't...I became a CRNA because I wanted to find a balance between anesthesiology and having a life."

"Ohhh, well...." I murmured as we came to a stop at a traffic light.

"Hey Charlie," he said as he looked over at me and put his hand on my knee. "I'm not about to propose. I just want one date—12 hours. Can I just get that?"

"Why? I mean, why try so hard on such an impossible date?"

"Let's just say I like a challenge..."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"You've got your 12 hours." I said smiling. He kept driving and driving until finally we ended up downtown. We parked in one of the many garages, and he came around to open my door.

"So?" I asked, hoping to find out where we were going.

"Bluefin sound okay?" He asked putting his hand on my back.

"Sounds perfect."

"I always knew sushi was the way to every girl's heart."

He didn't realize how true that was. We went inside and got a table. We picked what sushi we wanted. Surprisingly, we were pretty much in sync with our sushi choices. I felt my cold exterior beginning to melt, which was probably not a good thing.

"So how old are you Mr. Nurse Anesthetist?" I figured he had to be quite a bit older than me considering how many years it takes to become a CRNA.

"28. I'm like an old man compared to you kiddo."

"HEY!"

"I'm just kidding. 21 is more like an adolescent."

"Thanks. Thanks a lot." I kept a straight face and pretended to be upset.

"So what do you do?"

"I'm premed at RCC, but I'm sure you already knew that."

"Maybe I did. So are you in it for the money too?"

"Of course I am. So what all has Stevie told you about me exactly?"

"Enough to peak my interest—you jump out of airplanes, you pole dance, and you're going to be a doctor. I think that's pretty much the trifecta."

"Well...I'm not sure how accurate the pole dancing intel is, but..."

"I'm pretty sure it's accurate. You won't pole dance outside of class. Am I right?"

"Okay, okay. Maybe you do know a little bit about me. But what about you? She hasn't told me anything about you."

"I like sushi. I'm a nurse. I think that covers it."

"I feel so enlightened."

"Alright. My dad was in the Air force , so I was born in Spain. I'm actually fluent in Spanish. I went to school in Boston but my parents and little brother moved to Memphis. I decided to get a job here too. My dad wanted me to be a pilot so I learned how to fly. Um..I'm sure I have a few more tricks up my sleeve."

"Humm. So do you have a plane?"

"Why do you ask?"

"I ask because I want to know if you're loaded."

"I knew it."

"Actually, if you can fly and have a plane I thought you might let me jump out."

"My dad has a couple."

"I'm just going to let that one go."

"I wasn't spoiled."

"I never said you were" I laughed. We talked more and finished eating.

"So not that I didn't appreciate the sushi but is that really 'stepping up your game'?" I asked as we were walking back to his car.

"Who said that the night was over?" He said as we were getting back into car.

"It's almost midnight." I said. I was even surprised at how long we had spent at Bluefin.

"You promised me 12 hours. I still have about 8."

"I didn't know you literally meant 12 hours."

"Well, I did. We have a kinda long drive. You could take a nap if you like."

"That's okay. Just get me some caffeine and I'll be good."

"You aren't even going to ask where we are going?"

"Would it do me any good?"

"Nope. So what are we talking here—coffee, energy drink, IV drip?"

"I think an energy drink will be just fine," I said laughing and laughing.

I stayed up and talked for about 2 hours. He never would tell me how long it would be though. I felt like it was a few dates rolled into one. Stevie must have really told him about my dating issues. Before long, I lost the battle and fell asleep.

"Hey. We're here." I heard as his hand softly brushed my cheek.

"I fell asleep." I whispered.

He laughed and laughed and laughed. "Yes, yes you did."

"What time is it?"

"3:30. Come on. I can take off at night but we have to wait until sunrise to land."

"Wait. What? Take off? Are we flying?"

"Just come on. You'll see."

"Okay. Okay. Okay." I got out of the car and walked a ways before I saw it. "A hot air balloon?! We're going in a hot air balloon? Who's going to fly it?"

"Silly girl, I am."

"But who is going to pick us up. And sunrise is a while away. And..."

"Shhh. Just trust me. We're still in my 12 hours."

"Fine."

A few guys were there to help him get the balloon of the ground. He told me that they would come pick us up when we landed—we had a GPS in the balloon. I couldn't believe how beautiful everything was. I mean, I'd always wanted to jump out of a balloon, but I'd never thought about just riding in one.

"So what do you think?" he asked.

"I think you are going to have a lot to live up to next time." He didn't respond. He just smiled.

After a while, he finally asked the question I'd been expecting all night. "So what happened to you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Clearly there is nothing wrong with you. So why don't you date?"

"I have a problem with trust."

"So does it make you uncomfortable that your life is in my hands right now?"

"Terribly uncomfortable."

"I think I deserve more than generic answer for this balloon ride."

"I had trust issues and then I got hurt, creating even more trust issues."

"Define 'got hurt'."

"I wouldn't want to lose my mystery..."

"I don't think that's possible."

"I liked a guy, my first time really really liking someone. It ended and left me hurt."

"You like to keep your distance don't you? See, Stevie told me that you dated a guy for three months, he moved and you haven't been the same since. Somehow, I think there is more to the story than that."

"I...I...uh..." THIS is exactly why I don't date.

He came closer to me. "Charlie, I didn't mean it like that. Obviously, she is missing a rather large chunk of the story if it hurt you that bad."

"Cooper, this is our first date, a blind date at that. How much do you really need to know?"

"Do you think that you're the only one that's ever been hurt? I need to know what I'm getting myself into."

My mind drifted away to the day Macon broke it off. It feels like it was just yesterday--the pity in his eyes, his patronizing voice. "I don't think that I like you the way that you like me." The horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. "I really want to be friends still." The realization that my biggest fear was coming true.

"Charlie. Charlotte? Are you still with me?" I felt his hand on my face turning it towards his.

"You're not getting yourself into anything. Your 12 hours are almost up." I said sliding to the floor of the basket.

"Dammit Charlie" he said sitting down beside me, "That's not what I meant. I want to know why you can't trust me." He stopped. "No, I want you to be able to trust me,"

"Okay." I said as he slipped one arm around me. "The day before it ended I told Stevie that my biggest fear with guys is that one day they will just decide they don't like me, that one day they will just wake up not liking me anymore and I'll have no warning. The VERY next day that's what happened. The guy told me he didn't have feelings for me two days after he told me how amazing I was. That's what no one understands. It's not about losing a guy or even really having my 'heart broken.' Granted, I found out later that it wasn't his feeling that had changed but his job. By then it was too late."

"Hey you...look at me. I understand." He put his hand on my face. I thought he was going to kiss me. I wanted him to kiss me. "And just for the record, you seem pretty amazing to me." And then he just stood up. He didn't even try to kiss me. "Get up here." He said pulling me to my feet. "You can't enjoy the view from there." I stood up but I couldn't take my eyes off him. "What?"

"Nothing," I said smiling as I turned to enjoy the unique view.

We talked a lot more. We did have 3 hours. He told me how he'd had his heart broken. How his last girlfriend was over 4 years ago and she had cheated on him for months before he found out. I realized that he had trust issues too. I didn't want to like him. I really didn't. But I couldn't help it. Stevie knew I wouldn't be able to resist him. But I had to resist. Heartbreak was not something I was fond of.

"Look," he said slipping his arm around my waist. The sun had just begun to rise. It was truly the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For dinner. For the balloon ride. For everything."

"No, thank you."

"For what?"

"For giving me 12 hours."

The sun rose. We landed. A driver was waiting to pick us up. It only took us an hour to get back. We got back to the house around 8. Before we could even get to door, Stevie had opened it.

"Where have you been?!" She demanded.

"Uh. On a date?" I muttered, very confused.

"When you get done, we are going to have a chat young lady."

"Okay Mom." I laughed as she went back inside.

"I guess I'm gonna be in trouble too." Cooper snickered.

"I'll try to calm her down before she sees you at the hospital tomorrow." That's how Stevie knew Cooper. She was a sonographer at the hospital where he worked.

"That would be greatly appreciated." He gently kissed my forehead. "I had a great time with you. Really. I'm glad I convinced you to give me a few hours."

"Well when you put it that way..." I gave him a big hug anyways. "Thanks for an incredible night."

"You had fun, really?"

"Oh shut up."

"You take care. Bye." And he got into the car and drove off. I walked inside, not really sure what to think.

"Where in God's name have you been? I've been scared shitless! I called you a bazillion times."

"Stevie. Relax. I always turn my phone off on a date. Sorry."

"I was just worried. You're a little fragile you know." She took a deep breath. "So, where did he take you?"

"We went to eat at Bluefin."

"Okay, slightly above average."

"Then he took me on a hot air balloon ride."

"Are you serious?"

"Now I'm going to bed. I'm beat. I'll give you all the details later." I went to bed happily confused.