btw-book-01-part-03-discussions
ADULT ROMANCE

Btw Book 01 Part 03 Discussions

Btw Book 01 Part 03 Discussions

by r_d_oliver
19 min read
3.5 (1000 views)
adultfiction
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Braving the Waters, Book 1: The Shore

Author's Note: I apologize for the extremely long interval between Parts 02 and 03 (what you're reading now). Life got in the way, as it sometimes does. Hopefully I can keep to a more frequent update schedule in future, but I can make no guarantees. Thank you for reading, rating, and commenting. I hope you enjoy your stay.

Previous Installments

BtW Book 01, Part 01: Convergence

BtW Book 01, Part 02: The Devil of the Details

Part 3: Discussions

Kat arrived at Rosalyn's just shy of one o'clock. Pulling open the aluminum-framed glass door, she stepped into the simply-furnished interior and was promptly greeted by a blast of warm air from the vent set above the doorway. That was almost immediately followed by the comforting aroma of home cooking, the smells wafting from the stainless-steel-and-glass cafeteria counter across the room. She and Yun had often had lunch -- and sometimes, dinner -- here over the preceding weeks, and Kat had quickly acquired a taste for Filipino food.

As usual, Yun had arrived ahead; she was sitting with her back to the wall at the corner table they favored. There was a smattering of other customers, but none within easy earshot of "their" table. On seeing her, Yun raised a hand, motioning for her to come over.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Kat said, doffing her coat and draping it over the back of the empty chair.

Yun raised one finger.

"You know the rule. No talking shop until after eating. Let's go."

Kat suppressed a stab of irritation. Though she

was

hungry, she wanted to know what Yun wanted to discuss that couldn't have been taken care of via chat app or over the phone. But she had been taught to be polite, so she said nothing and followed Yun to the serving counter instead.

When she got there, Yun was already animatedly gesturing at the chafing dishes. The day of her first audition, Kat had been amazed when Yun led her to the counter and began ordering in what Kat guessed was the owner's native language. It had left her wondering just how many languages Yun was fluent in, and how she had managed to learn all of them while having such an extensive filmography.

But that was neither here nor there at the moment. Kat grabbed a tray and fell in line behind her friend, her eyes already scanning what was available. Despite her earlier irritation and ongoing preoccupation with everything that was going on in her professional life, a small smile crossed her lips as she saw several of her favorites on offer.

Once Yun had finished ordering and taken the plates Rosario -- who co-owned the eatery with her husband Ramon -- handed to her, Kat stepped up, did one more quick survey, and made her choices. Though Yun had taught her the names of most of the food over the course of their visits, today was the first time Kat had dared to ask for anything by name instead of the tried-and-true finger-point. With a new phase of her career -- and perhaps even her life -- in the offing, it felt like the right time to try something else she'd never done before. Even if it was minor in the overall scheme of things.

Rosario smiled, nodded, and began ladling the food onto several disposable plates. While she waited, Kat happened to glance over at Yun. Her friend was smiling too.

"What? Is my accent that bad?" A faint undercurrent of fear ran through Kat's mind as she wondered if she had been too sure of herself.

"No," Yun said, with a laugh. "For someone who says she has a tin ear, you've learned pretty quick. Still have a bit of an accent, but it's minuscule."

"Oh," Kat replied, as she felt relief wash over her. "Well, I only know the dozen words you've taught me-"

"You're forgetting the cursey words," Yun interrupted, still smiling, "Otherwise known as the important ones."

"Fine," Kat continued, putting some mock-exasperation into her tone, "

Three

dozen, then. I'm still not fluent like you."

Yun gently waved off the compliment.

"That's what happens when you shoot three charming cheapie films back-to-back-to-back in the rural areas of the Philippines over the course of six months. And I wouldn't call myself fluent. I know just enough to get by, which is why I don't list it on my CV."

A slight tap on the counter interrupted their conversation, as Rosario indicated she had finished plating Kat's order. Kat took the plates and placed them on her tray, then followed Yun to the cashier, who today was Rosario's eldest daughter, Lyn. Kat was reaching for her wallet when Yun laid a hand on her arm.

"My treat."

"But-"

"Look, I dragged you out here. I owe you lunch, at least."

"You didn't really drag me, but if you insist. Thanks." Inwardly, Kat found herself wishing she'd ordered less food. Though Yun could certainly afford to pick up the tab for lunch, Kat hadn't been brought up to take advantage of people's generosity.

"You're welcome," Yun replied. When she had finished paying for their meals, she led Kat back to the corner. There, they transferred their plates to the table, after which Kat took the trays and put them atop the trash receptacle located in the middle of the eatery. Then she sat down opposite Yun, who was already digging in.

As they ate, Yun kept to the rule and refrained from discussing their new project at all. Instead, she elaborated on the shoot in the Philippines she had mentioned earlier. While the story was fascinating, Kat found herself still distracted by the question of what Yun wanted to talk to her about. But no matter how much she worried at that particularly perplexing bone, she couldn't arrive at a satisfactory answer. So immersed was she in her thoughts that she only caught the tail end of Yun's story.

"-she stayed on after we wrapped. Last I heard, and this was years ago, they had three kids."

"Huh," was all Kat could say, having heard nothing of what had preceded that sentence-and-a-half. Whatever hope she might have entertained that Yun wouldn't notice her inattention was promptly dashed on the rocks of her friend's customary perspicacity.

"You've hardly heard a word I've said in the last ten minutes, have you?" Yun's smile and mild tone leached the words of any sting they might have had.

"Sorry," Kat replied, blushing while trying to hide her discomfiture by starting in on her dessert: a tumbler of crushed ice mixed with various sweet condiments and drowned in evaporated milk.

"You get this particularly intense look in your eyes when you're hyper-focused on something. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't your lunch, even though Ramon outdid himself today."

Kat began to answer, but again Yun raised a single finger, forestalling her attempt.

"As much as I love this place, it's too small and there are too many people here for what I want to discuss. Finish your

halo-halo

and then we'll go someplace more conducive."

"I can finish it while we walk," Kat said. She'd never liked waiting; it always gave her mind the opportunity to think and, consequently, over-think. Better to do something, even if it didn't directly relate to the matter at hand. In this case, however, they were the same thing. So much the better.

Kat put the tumbler down on the table before standing and pulling on her coat. Gathering up all the plates and cutlery, she took them over to the trash bin and disposed of them before returning to the table. She picked up her tumbler and indicated the door with a tilt of her head.

"Let's go."

Yun put on her own coat and they went out into a cold afternoon. As they walked, Kat took an occasional spoonful, wincing slightly as the combination of the ice in the dessert and the outside temperature gave her a mild case of brain freeze. Yun shook her head.

"

Halo-halo

is a particular favorite of mine, but it's a summer thing for me and Filipinos both. Don't know how you can eat it in this weather. I'm surprised they were even offering it."

"I love the cold," Kat replied, shrugging. "And I love my cold desserts, so you're not going to hear me complain. Where are we going?"

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"Waterfront."

Kat nodded in understanding.

"Not going to be a lot of people out in this weather. Will you be okay? There's enough of a wind to bite."

Yun patted the sleeve of her coat and indicated the hood hanging loose from the collar. She finished by patting her coat pockets.

"Latest low-profile, hi-tech thermal lining. Stuff like this is where I don't skimp on cost. I'll be fine. I even have mittens."

Neither of them said anything more until they drew near to the wide, shallow park that lined the waterfront to one side of the harbor. Sure enough, hardly anyone was out, although at one of the chess tables there was a pair of older men engrossed in a match, both of them apparently oblivious -- or impervious -- to the temperature.

Yun paused, and Kat took the opportunity to polish off her dessert, tossing the spoon and now-empty tumbler into a nearby trash can. As Kat turned back, she saw Yun nod to herself, the curt gesture punctuated with a toss of her head that indicated a vacant wrought-iron-and-wood bench far from the chess players. Then, without waiting, Yun set off, her long strides making Kat half-run just to keep pace. When they reached the bench, Yun sat, one hand resting on the armrest on her side, her other hand motioning for Kat to take a seat. Kat did so, feeling a slight chill from the wooden slats even through the layers of her clothing.

Yun said nothing for a good long while, instead carefully pulling her hood over her hair and donning a pair of mittens she took from a coat pocket. Then she stared out across the water, her lips pressed into a thin line. When she finally spoke, her voice was pitched almost too softly for Kat to hear.

"I haven't been completely honest with you. About the reason for this talk."

Yun's shoulders rose, then fell. A sigh perhaps, but Kat couldn't be sure.

"I probably gave you the impression that it was about you. About your...surprising decision. It is, but it's really more about me."

Kat wasn't sure if she could interrupt, but she felt as though she needed to. A tiny part of herself had taken slight offense at the implication in Yun's words.

"Is it

really

that surprising?"

Yun turned. Her face, normally so mobile and expressive, was unreadable. Kat had never seen her so controlled.

"Yes. Given how anxious you've been even before we knew. I'm no stranger to nudity or sex in movies, but I've only ever done a scene like the final one in this project

once

. And it sure as hell wasn't on my first film. Everyone's different of course, but...." Yun finished her sentence by shrugging.

"So what changed your mind?" she asked, after a short pause.

"I made

up

my mind," Kat replied, wanting to be precise. "I didn't change it."

"What made you decide, then?"

"What you told me. At rehearsal." Kat answered, without thinking. The words were barely out of her mouth when Yun scoffed. Gently, but she still scoffed.

"Kat, you can be really convincing when you're playing a role, but you can't lie worth a damn when you aren't. You were too polite to say it -- then

and

now -- but you weren't buying what I was selling. Not completely, anyway."

"Why don't you tell me, then? Since you seem to have me all figured out." Again, Kat spoke without thinking, her annoyance making her abandon her usual careful consideration. Realizing she had gotten snappish, she began forming an apology, but Yun spoke before she could fully shape the words.

"Actually, I

don't

have you figured out," Yun replied, without rancor. "Every time I think I do, you surprise me. And in case it's not clear, that's a compliment. So please try not to get prickly."

Kat blushed. Suddenly uncomfortable, she tried to steer the conversation back to where Yun had started.

"You said this was actually about you. What do you mean?"

"Tough time with compliments, huh?" The small smile that accompanied the question brought the Yun Kat knew back to the fore -- but only for an instant. "What I meant is that I'm a coward, Kat."

"You? No way."

"Oh but I am. I've just learned how to hide it very, very well. Call it a legacy of the house I grew up in. It wasn't a place to let anyone know you were bleeding."

Yun laughed. It was a bitter, brittle sound, completely unlike her usual expressions of mirth. Kat shivered, but not from the cold. It was a sound she never wanted to hear again.

"It gave me the skills to build a career away from my family's shadow, so it wasn't

all

bad. I suppose you could call it a blessing in disgust. Do you remember what I told Talia the day we met?"

"You said a lot of things," Kat replied. "I remember most of them, but I don't know which you mean." Had it really been less than a month? It seemed so much longer.

"Why someone with my CV was 'slumming' in an indie project." An edge entered Yun's voice as she said the words.

Again Kat found herself uncomfortable, albeit for a different reason.

"Something happened on your last film. Something...bad."

Kat chose the final word very carefully. Exactly what Yun had meant by "a difficult time" was open to interpretation. But judging by both her reaction and Talia's, not to mention what Kat knew about the industry, some interpretations were more likely than others. None of them were good, but the ones that most readily came to mind were among the worst. However, saying anything more than that one word would be complete speculation, and nothing good would come of that either.

"Yes," Yun replied, turning away to look out over the water again. She shoved her hands into the pockets of her coat, seeming to fold into herself.

"I'm not ready to discuss details. Don't know

when

I'll be ready. It's a day-to-day thing. So let's just say what happened left me...skittish. About a lot of things. But the most relevant is intimacy, even the pretend-intimacy of film."

Again Kat wasn't sure if she should interrupt. And again, she felt she had to.

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"Then why audition-"

"Why audition for a project from a production company known -- some would say notorious -- for not being shy about sex and nudity?"

"Yes."

"First, because I wanted to keep working. If you let this business forget you, it's a death knell for your career, and I've already gone almost a year without a new project. Not to mention that, unless I pivot successfully into different roles, I'm fast approaching my sell-by date as a pretty face. Besides, when everything's said and done, I love acting. Can't really imagine doing anything else. And I'll be

damned

if I let

anything

chase me away from it." Yun glanced at her briefly, and even though she turned away almost immediately, Kat couldn't miss the ferocity in her eyes.

"Second, as I said back then, Taika Studios has a reputation -- well-deserved -- for treating their talent well. So if there was any project to shoot for, or a director to work under, this would be it. No shenanigans like what happened on my last project."

"Finally, I also told you at practice that there's no point in worrying too much about unknowns. That wasn't just for your benefit. It's how I live my life. I save my time and energy for when there's something to focus on."

Yun turned, resting her leg on the bench so she could more fully look Kat in the face. She took her hands out of her pockets, gesturing as she spoke.

"Talia might not have offered me a part.

Inkunzi-Seven

might have been atypical for a Taika Studios film. Any part I was offered might not require much in the way of sex or nudity. Do you see where I'm going?"

Kat nodded.

"There were potential situations where your...issues wouldn't be relevant."

"Exactly. Even when it was becoming clear that we were up for the leading roles, there was still a possibility the supporting characters would be doing most -- if not all -- the heavy lifting on the sex and nudity front. It's a common enough practice in this business. Until I read Addendum One. But even then, I told myself there was still a possible out."

"The rookie."

"I wouldn't say it so derisively, but yeah, you. Especially after -- as I've said more than once -- you were so worried about it. I was sure you'd ask Talia to tone things down. And that she'd agree. I wouldn't have to get involved, wouldn't have to let anyone see my weakness. Which is why I called myself a coward. I was hoping you'd do something I wasn't sure I could do for myself."

Yun gave a little shake of her head as if to clear it, then took a breath and slowly let it out, the exhalation a faint cloud in the frigid air.

"But then, then you send me that message. 'I'm not going to ask for any changes.' You said other things, but that's the part where I felt my guts tie themselves into knots."

Yun looked at her then, really

looked

, her eyes seeming to bore right into Kat's very being. Her tone was almost pleading.

"What helped you make up your mind? Not the glib answer. Not the quick answer. Not the one you think I want or need to hear. Assuming you even know it yourself."

Kat didn't answer. Of

course

she knew. But was that reason, reason

enough

? Last night, in the solitude of her own thoughts, it had certainly felt that way. Now, though? Saying it out loud, actually

telling

someone else, someone she liked and respected. And after what Yun had just revealed? Would her reason still hold up? Would Yun think her shallow? Would Yun

hate

her? Kat didn't know, and that worried her. So she played for time.

"Don't take this the wrong way," Kat began, once more being very careful with her choice of words, with her very tone. "I'm not trying to be difficult. But what's stopping you from asking for changes now? Then letting Talia hammer out a compromise between the three of us?"

"You've never struck me as impulsive, so you must have more of a basis for your decision than 'Because.' I want to extend you the courtesy of at least listening to your reasons before I do anything."

"But I was always willing to compromise, more so now that I know about your situation," Kat responded, even as she suddenly found herself wondering if her decision had been purely impulsive after all. "I was never going to insist things be my way or the highway. I mean, I'm still the newbie in all this. It's not like I have the clout to demand much of anything."

A spark of anger flared in Yun's eyes at the words, but what Yun said next made it clear to Kat that the bulk of that anger wasn't directed at her.

"

Never

say that, Kat. Don't you

ever

say that. If you don't find yourself a spine, stand up for yourself, and put your foot down from the get-go, you'll end up like a lot of other people in this business. Exploited and burnt out, smiling on the outside, but dead inside."

Yun's shoulders slumped and she looked away, to where her clenched fist had pounded the back of the bench as she'd spoken.

"Going along to get along is all well and good. But you have to know when to push back. Things would have gone

much

worse for me if I hadn't. And even then I didn't come away unscathed."

She looked back at Kat then, and the plea was back in her gaze.

"Please tell me. You know my reservations. I'd like to know why you don't seem to have any."

A sudden calm stole over Kat as she decided to stop overthinking it. Her reason was what it was, and she wasn't going to lie to Yun to save face. Damn the torpedoes then.

"You're going to think I'm silly-" she began, despite her determination that she wasn't going to care how she looked. She might have laughed at her silliness if she hadn't been so focused on just getting the words out.

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