Brave New World

BRAVE NEW WORLD

This, my story, began one night three years ago. I had just returned home from work and had barely got in the house when my wife, June, yelled at me from somewhere in the house, "Take a quick shower, we're going out for dinner to the Olive Tree!"

This was a new twist, so I made my way towards our bedroom, took my shower and changed to some more casual clothes since the Olive Tree wasn't a place to get dressed up for. As a matter of fact, I couldn't understand why we were going there because they had really terrible food and June knew I hated the place. Anyway, I was ready to go in about 25 minutes and after I sent a quick text I found June waiting for me in the living room.

As she stood, I moved to give her a kiss, but she had turned to go already, so I followed her out the door and locked it. We made the 15-minute drive to the mall, where the restaurant resided in the parking lot. As we made our way into the restaurant, June led the way not stopping with the hostess, but continuing in on her own. When she came to a booth with someone sitting in it, she sat down next to that person leaving the seat across from them for me to sit in.

I took my seat with a smile and looked up at June and the man she cozied up to, who was one Clyde Sims, a junior vice president for the company where June had been working. I had never met the man, but was pretty unimpressed with the smirk and greeting he gave me. "So, I finally get to meet the cuckold!"

"Jason," June said, "This is Clyde Sims, the man I'm leaving you for." She said this with a smile and then turned her eyes to her paramour. "I want a man who has power and prestige, not a simple accountant, so I'm filing for divorce."

She then slid a manila envelope towards me and said, "These are the terms of our divorce. Just sign them and we can move on."

I took the envelope and while I opened it, I said with a smile, "Wow, you went with full ambush mode." I removed the papers and began reading them carefully. As I read, the waitress stopped at our table and asked if we were ready to order. June and Clyde made their orders as I continued to read. I could tell that she was waiting for me, but I continued reading the documents in my hand.

Finally, the waitress asked, "Sir, are you ready to order?"

I looked up at her, smiled and said, "Oh god no! This place has the worst food I have ever had. It's damn near as bad as these two. I'll just have a glass of water, thank you." I then continued reading.

I could tell the two across from me were looking at me with daggers as I continued reading and I was content to let them stew. When I had finished, I put the papers down, looked up, smiled and said, "Well, that was interesting, but I'm afraid that I can't sign it. There are too many things that are incorrect in here."

The two looked at me with anger and then Clyde asked, "Too many things are wrong? Like what?"

I chuckled and said, "There are so many things. Do you really want me to relate them all to you now? I'm hungry and want to go somewhere where the food is edible." They were staring again, so I said, "Okay, I'll just give you the highlights. Feel free to stop me whenever you want."

I picked up the papers again and said, "Okay 70/30 split in your favor June. Well, that's a nonstarter. I'm thinking more in terms of 0/100 in my favor since I will be suing you for divorce citing adultery."

June sputtered and cried out, "I have never cheated!" Which caused me to start laughing uproariously, bringing attention to our table.

As I calmed down, I replied, "Yeah, right! We'll get to that in a bit. To continue, you can't have the house because it isn't ours. It belongs to the company, and you can't have half of the company because it isn't mine, it belongs to my father. I just work there."

June looked at me with suspicion and said, "I know you own the business so even if the business owns the house, I know that you own it, so quit fucking around!"

Again, I laughed and said, "I'm not the one fucking around, you are." She was getting quite red in the face, so I continued. "My father owns the business, our house and our cars. By the way, yours is being repossessed by the company right now.

"Anyway, to continue, other than my paycheck I have no money except for our small savings, checking account and your 401k, which I will be asking for half of. Let's see, what else is wrong here? Ah, you are accusing me of cheating, but we know that's a fabrication and I'm fairly certain that any "proof" (I said this using my fingers to simulate the quotation marks) has been fabricated and I'm pretty sure will be easy to disprove."

June looked at me and said, "You're full of shit! I guess we'll let the court decide what is true or not!"

Once again, I laughed which caused the two across from me to get even more mad. As they steamed, I pulled my phone from my breast pocket and said, "Okay, I think this is a good time for you to come in now."

The pair looked at each other and then at me with Clyde asking, "Who are you talking to?"

"I'm sure you'll recognize her when she gets here." At this time their food arrived, so I continued, "In the meantime you may want to hurry up and eat because I think the food you'll get in the future may even be worse than this slop!"

At this time, I saw the person I was expecting walking towards our booth, so I stood and was greeted with a hug and a kiss on the cheek by Marge Campbell, the President, CEO and owner of Consolidated Manufacturing, June and Clyde's employer. When they saw who was sitting down, they both looked at her in surprise. After a few seconds, Clyde found his voice and said, "Uh, Mrs. Campbell, what are you doing here?"

She smiled at the couple across from us like a shark about to devour its prey and said, "I'm here at the invitation of Jason, though I can't believe anyone would come and eat at this place without being forced to!" She turned to me and asked, "Are you finished yet?"

I smiled at her and said, "No, I just have one more thing to cover and then the floor is yours." I turned my attention back to my soon to be ex-wife and her lover and said, Now I'd like to get back to your lie about you having never cheated on me.

"About 4 months ago, I happened to be in your office building at Marge's invitation which she will explain in a bit. Anyway, as I was about to head towards your office, I saw you coming out of this asshole's office a bit disheveled checking your shirt was tucked into your skirt properly and your lips looking all puffy with your lipstick missing. It was pretty apparent what was going on behind closed doors, especially as I saw the looks your co-workers gave you as you passed them by. So, I decided to hire a PI and had you followed."

At this time, Marge handed me a manila envelope of my own. I opened it and began pulling a series of photos out and placed them in front of June while I said, "By the way, your idiot boyfriend let the cat out of the bag when he greeted me as a cuckold. You two couldn't be any stupider! Anyway, before you are a series of pictures my PI has taken over the months of the two you not having sex and not cheating on me as June would have it. Neither one of you has been very discreet. I'm surprised you hadn't cottoned on that I knew of your affair since I haven't touched you since my discovery. I'm done now, so the floor is yours, Marge."

Marge smiled at me and said, "Thanks, Jason. Now the two of you are probably wondering, 'why of all people she's here?' Well, the answer lies in why Jason was in our building 4 months ago. I had received some disturbing information from one of our clients, the Department of Defense. They had run an inventory on some our shipments and had discovered that certain items were missing from those shipments and were wondering what was going on.

"I hired Jason because he is considered the most effective forensic accountant in the state, if not the country. The morning he saw you two was the first day I had called him in to explain what my situation was. I gave him carte blanche to review our books and anything else he needed to determine where the problem was that the DoD was complaining about. It took Jason about two days to figure out what was going on and upon his recommendation we decided to plant surveillance cameras in your office, Clyde, as well as taps on your phone and computers.

"I'm pretty sure that by stealing from a government agency, this crime is now federal and we've given all of our findings to the FBI which is itching to get you into custody. The little triumvirate of you, Mrs. Jackson here and our CFO Rafael Gomez will be arrested in a few moments.

"Oh, and by the way, Jason here tracked down your offshore accounts and has recovered your ill-gotten gains. I'm not sure if you are aware of it or not, but there is no parole in the Federal penal system. My guess is that you'll be incarcerated for 50 years, so as Jason said, you best enjoy this slop while you can.

"I just have to say to you, Mrs. Jackson that you must be the stupidest cow I have ever met. Your husband is a legend and wields more power and prestige than this fool ever could have. Enjoy your time in prison because your conviction is a slam dunk thanks to Jason. Have a great life!"

With that, Marge raised her right arm, snapped her right fingers and almost immediately there were two FBI agents standing next to our table taking June and her lover into custody. As they were about to leave, Marge said to one of the agents, "Make sure this cretin pays for this crap before he goes and make sure it's cash and he leaves a big tip!"

She then turned to me and said, "I'm starving, let's get out of this place. My husband is waiting for us at Chez Maurice, you can drive us since I came with the FBI." I complained that I wasn't dressed well enough for that restaurant, but she told me not to worry.

When we arrived, the maître'd greeted Marge by name and told her that her husband was awaiting us at our table. He escorted us back to a corner table and when her husband Mark saw us, he stood and greeted us. He gave his wife a hug and a kiss and the took my hand and shook it and asked, "Everything went as planned?"

Mark held his wife's chair for her as she said, "Perfectly. Now I'm starving as is Jason. We've been sitting in the Olive Tree for over an hour and the stench of that place was killing me."

As she said this a waiter approached with an ice bucket and a bottle of Champagne. The waiter pulled the bottle from the ice and presented it to Mark. "The Veuve Cliquot 2008 Grand Dame as requested sir."

Mark smiled and nodded, so the waiter poured three glasses for us. When the bottle was placed back in the bucket, Mark raised his glass and said, "To a satisfactory conclusion to a monumental mess. Jason, Marge and I thank you from the bottom of our hearts and we hope we can establish a long-term relationship with you."

Marge cried out, "Here, here!" and then the three of us tapped glasses. Now, I had never had much champagne in my life and what I had was probably the cheapest swill made in California. This stuff, however, was absolutely marvelous!

We each savored several sips and then Marge said, "When Mark referred to a long-term relationship, he was referring to a request we would like to make. We would like to hire you as our next Chief Financial Officer. What you did for us was beyond stellar and with you in charge of the company's finances, we would both feel very comfortable in the knowledge that we were being taken care of.

"I realize that we are hitting you with this out of the blue and that you are going through some very traumatic things right now, so we would like you to take your time to think about our offer. We both think you are an excellent choice."

I was gob smacked by the offer, but as I thought about it, I thought the idea had merit. I had an MBA on top of my accounting degree and CPA and thought this would be the offer of a lifetime, but I really needed to talk to my Dad about it, so I looked at the two of them and said, "Wow, I'm pretty shocked about your offer. Would you mind if I talk to my parents first? I usually bounce big decisions off of them before I jump."

Mark laughed and said, "I know your father well and I think he'd be an excellent resource for you to talk to. Take as much time as you need. Now, dinner! Marge will start stealing food off of other patron's plates if we don't feed her soon!"

I enjoyed my dinner with the two of them. They were about the same age as my parents and like my parents seemed to be totally in love with each other. The three of us told stories about our lives and laughed quite a bit. The food we had was wonderful and by the time we finished we had not only killed the champagne, but a bottle of outstanding Chateau Lafite Rothschild and a snifter of Cognac. I wasn't much of a drinker, so I was in no shape to drive home. They had anticipated this and gave me a ride in their limo while they had another driver take my car home for me.

The next morning, I didn't feel as hungover as I thought I would, so I called my Dad and asked if I could stop by the house to talk to he and Mom. As always, he said I didn't have to ask, but I always wanted to give them a heads up. I was greeted at the door by my Mom who gave me a bone crushing hug and a kiss on the cheek. I had kept them appraised of what was going on with June, so they asked how it went last night.

I explained how June had tried to ambush me, but how Marge and I, in fact, ambushed the two of them. I then told them about my dinner with the Campbells and then said, "The reason I came here is I wanted to get both of your opinions on something that came up at dinner last night." The two of them looked at me as if they were expecting Hercule Poirot to name the killer in one of his books, so I blurted out, "The Campbell's asked me to be their CFO!"

My Mom squeaked and my Dad laughed, not the response I was expecting, so I asked, "What do you think? I don't want to leave you in the lurch Dad."

My Dad's eyes twinkled as he shook his head and said, "Son, I know you are a smart boy, probably the smartest I have ever met, but if you let this opportunity go I'll have to reconsider just how smart I think you are. Mark Campbell is a sharp one as well and probably the finest attorney in the state, plus, Marge is probably sharper than Mark. They know quality when they see it and they see it in you. So, I would recommend you call them at your earliest convenience and tell them you'll take the job. Our firm will be just fine."

We had lunch and talked most of the afternoon about family and jobs. My mother had an ear to ear grin as she hugged me and told me how proud she was of me. To me, that was the greatest praise I could ever receive. Later that day, I called Marge and told her that I would be happy to accept their offer. I didn't even know what my salary would be, but I knew I could trust them to be fair.

I showed up at Consolidated Monday morning and was shown into Marge's office. She and I talked about my compensation package and other areas of my job. Next, I was ushered into the former office of Rafael Gomez. Marge told me they had replaced all of the furniture in the office and had replaced the computer that the FBI had confiscated. I was introduced to my personal assistant, Emily Hobson, and we sat and talked for an hour getting to know each other. I was then led to a conference room, where I was introduced to the rest of my team.

I had met most of them while I was conducting my audit and had gotten along with all of them. I explained what my expectations of the job were and how they were integrated into those expectations. I told them I would always have an open door and to feel free to come talk at any time. I then told them I would meet with each of them separately and discuss our futures together.

Emily, Marge and I returned to my office and as we sat down, Marge said, "By the way, Mark and I are throwing a party in your honor on Saturday. There will be a number of people from the office in addition to some people from the news media in attendance. We will also invite your parents. It will be an informal barbeque at our place, so if you'll be there, say, around 1pm, that would be great. Emily, you and your husband are cordially invited as well."

When Marge had left, I sat with Emily and told her she could call me Jason or Jase if she liked and then I asked her to tell me how this office operated under my predecessor. "Well, Mr. Gomez was very formal and highly secretive, for reasons that are clear to me now. He hardly ever met with the people in his charge and communicated mostly through emails. He was also kind of handsy if you know what I mean. To be honest, nobody was very happy working for him because he was so impersonal, he had quite a temper and would tear into people in front of everyone else."

I looked at Emily and said, "You'll discover I have a different method of interacting with my staff. As I said to the group, my door will always be open and as my PA I would appreciate it if you would allow them to see me whenever I'm in. Also, I realize that we are about the same age and you are quite attractive, but you can rest assure that I will never, ever come on to you. Okay?"

Her smile lightened the room with its brightness as she said, "My husband, Pete, will appreciate that! When I told him some of the stuff that Mr. Gomez tried, he threatened to come down here and put him in the hospital."

I laughed and said, "I don't blame him. Hey wait, you wouldn't happen to be married to Pete Hobson would you. He graduated from high school around 2011?"

Emily looked surprised and said, "Yeah, that's him! Do you know him?"

I chuckled and said, "Yeah, we went to high school together. We weren't close or anything, but we knew each other. He was an all-state linebacker on the football team and went to play at the University of Wisconsin, if I remember correctly. It was lucky for Mr. Gomez that Pete didn't follow up on his original idea!"

We both laughed as we pictured in our minds what Gomez would have looked like after Pete got done with him.

So, the first week I spent 10-hour days at the job, getting myself settled in as I researched all facets of the company. Despite me telling her she could go home, Emily worked with me every day for the full 10 hours. By Friday I had an excellent grasp of where I was working and decided to make some changes in how payments, shipments and ordering was done in order to prevent the things that my soon to be ex, her lover and my predecessor pulled off.

On Saturday, I arrived at my employer's house about 10 minutes before 1pm and was let in by one of their staff. As the valet led me towards the backyard, I was surprised to see all of the guests, including my parents, were already there. I was led through some open French doors to where Marge and Mark were standing.

Marge had a microphone in her hand and said, "Ladies and gentlemen, it is with great pleasure that I introduce the new CFO of Consolidated Manufacturing. May I present Mr. Jason Jackson. Jason recently worked for us in another capacity as a forensic accountant because some former employees had been stealing from our company and the Federal government. Jason rooted out the guilty parties within days and then helped us and the FBI get all of the necessary proof of their indiscretions.

"Mark and I were so impressed with his work we decided we needed him to be a part of our company. Please join us in welcoming Jason to our family."

I was given a warm applause for several seconds and then Marge told her guests to enjoy themselves. She then turned to me, gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek and when I was released, Mark shook my hand. Mark then said, "Marge tells me you have been putting in long hours and have come up with a plan to prevent anymore wrongdoing in the future. I'd say we've got our money's worth already."