Bondi Beach

CHAPTER 1

Two days after the excitement of her twenty-ninth birthday, the normally well-adjusted and delightful Dani Buchanan spent most of Saturday in bed depressed.

At present Dani (Danielle) was a redhead. At other times she could be blonde or brunette.

Claire her mom fussed over her. Dani's dad Robert was too busy preparing to go to golf to worry about her and Dani's older brother Nigel, visiting home for the weekend, was banished from the house after asking Dani in front of their mom was she pregnant. That charge really sent Dani into her spin and she upset her mom when she said she wished she were pregnant because that would give her purpose in life.

"Stop it. You cannot get pregnant until you've had the joy of a real romance," sniffed her mother, running from the bedroom.

Claire returned later with lunch a little distraught and asked, "Please dear tell me what's really bothering you?"

Through tears Dani finally released it.

"Mom I'm destined to live a lonely life. I've never yet a guy not already married that I'd like to live with and here am I almost thirty and over the hill."

"Oh is that all?"

"Mom, you don't understand. You of all people must be able to understand. You and dad had to get married when you both were nineteen."

"Well I was unlucky."

"How can you call it unlucky marrying the man you loved at that age?"

"Darling I regret I missed out being in the arms of different men. I used to often wonder how other guys I knew would rate in terms of getting me off compared with your father."

"Mom! I can't believe what I just heard. I wasn't confident you knew anything about sex."

"Well what I just said is something very confidential, just between you and me."

"Oh mom, I feel so very sorry for you."

"Well that's understandable considering the number of young men I assume have had their way with you."

Dani wiped her eyes and said, "Let me hug you mom."

They hugged and Dani told her mom something that really interested Claire.

"You know mom, I really could fill a big bus with the guys who have had sex more than once with me but the truth is I've really yet to met a guy who took my breath away, although Charles Joyce came close.

"Your assistant professor at college? Oh god darling, Mr Joyce was married."

"That's exactly my problem mom; all the good guys are married."

Claire bit her lip thinking. "Look darling, resign your job. I'll arrange for you to go and live with your aunt in Sydney at Bondi and adventure is bound to happen to you there. Karen is always saying Australia is such an exciting place to live."

"I bet she changes her mind about that every time a swimmer is eaten by a shark or crocodile or giant python or killed by lightning, bush fires, dust storms or is lost in the Outback and fatally dehydrated."

"Oh darling, you only hear or read about isolated sensational deaths like that because they are mostly peculiar to Australia. Probably more women here die when pulling on their tights than those collectively in Australia who die from shark or crocodile attacks or are bitten by deadly spiders. I'm not sure that Australian pythons are the giant species."

"Well you won't get me going there for love or money."

"I was thinking of putting 20k into your bank account to help you to settle in Australia after Karen and Ivan have had enough of you. A twenty-nine year old who can't find love might be unsettling to them because both are into their third marriage."

"Oh that makes them like me mom, unable to find true love. Um do you really mean twenty thousand dollars, no questions asked?"

"Yes, the only condition will be that you stay in Australia three years to give yourself a real chance."

"Mom, I'm off to shower. God I could eat a horse. Please phone Aunt Karen now."

* * *

Dani looked around the arrival area at Sydney airport anxiously. It was nine years since she's seen her mom's much younger sister and Karen had asked Dani to wear a red beret because it was unlikely another other young woman would wear a red beret. Indeed, very unlikely. When reading that emailed request Dani had wondered what pills her aunt took.

"Darling, it's so lovely to see you even this is your back I'm viewing."

Dani almost jumped a foot hearing her mother's voice behind her. Well, at least the tone was similar, certainly not the accented drawl. She turned and tried not to boggle. Her aunt's skin with the colour of copper, her facial skin was dry and prematurely wrinkled and she was dressed like a teenager with cut-off jeans shorts and wearing a silk cami without a shirt.

"Aunt Karen," Dani screamed to disguise her distaste at the appearance of the woman. They hugged and Karen pushed Dani back a bit and said, "Oh my, those are big ones. Have you had them augmented?"

Dani almost died in embarrassment. She whispered no, conscious other people were looking at them, er, her breasts. An old guy under the disguise of three days' stubble, a straw hat, very dark sunglasses and a yellow 'Visit Bondi' t-shirt over a huge beer belly leered at her saying, "Nice ones babe."

"On your way Bozo."

"Dani, don't be rude to your Uncle Ivan."

With great presence of mind Dani said, "Ohmigod, please excuse me. I'm disoriented and almost incoherent after my long transatlantic flight."

"Disoriented is correct, Uncle Ivan laughed. "My dear girl you have spent all night crossing the Pacific. Let's get her home and get some beers into her Ren."

So the jerk had shortened Karen's short name to Ren. What a Bozo.

"I'll get the car girls," Bozo said, ambling off.

"You'll love Ivan. He's such a character. Oh, you must call me Karen because aunt makes me feel old and call Ivan Ivan because he's not your real uncle."

Again travel weary Dani wondered what pills Karen was on. Love Ivan, ha!

But that was about to change.

Karen stood with the yawning Dani outside the terminal when added to the usual traffic noise was the grunty sound of an expertly tuned V8 motor. People waiting on the sidewalk for buses, hotel pickups and private pickups peered to the right and into sight came one of the most beautiful 'Yank Tanks' Dani had ever seen and behind the wheel was Bozo, er Uncle Ivan er Ivan.

"Isn't she a beauty? We called her Marilyn," Karen sighed. "I love her but sometimes think Ivan loves her more than he does me."

"She's absolutely gorgeous."

"Oh darling. I must tell Ivan that. He'll be elated."

Dani's luggage disappeared into the cavernous trunk and she and Karen sat on the turquoise and white leather back seat of the totally restored 1955 Oldsmobile Starfire convertible. As Ivan drove them off slowly in the 21-foot long blue and white lady, people smiled and waved at them, Karen said, "You'll be feeling like Miss Daisy."

Dani smiled and fell sleep, holding her aunt's hand.

A 'Where-am-I?' wakening for Dani next morning was followed by some stretching and then came the distant call from Karen.

"Come to the kitchen Dani."

Dani dressed hurriedly and followed the smell of coffee to find the kitchen. She remembered arriving at the Art Deco style elevated home above its four garages fronting the street without lawn or garden. She'd staggered up the steps led by her aunt and was in bed and falling asleep within minutes, her aunt saying, "You drank too much booze on the aircraft young lady."

Her aunt greeted her with a huge smile, unembarrassed at being seen in a ridiculously short nightdress with no bra and obviously no panties. God her aunt shaved!

"Please excuse how I look around the home. I even walk around in the nude. If you hear banging and me squealing you'll know Ivan is... er... having his fill."

"I understand."

"You shouldn't blush if you are a redhead. Let's go to a hairdresser today and get you blonded. It will suit you much better.'

"Okay."

"Oh only one or two words for conversation? You are embarrassed by my state of undress. I'll..."

"No please don't. Your figure is not unattractive and this is your home."

"Thank you darling. You will learn by this: I get far more sex by wandering about nude or barely dressed. I rather like sex."

"I must remember that."

Passing the machine-made coffee that curled Dani's nostrils as they strained to maximize the take-in of aroma, Karen asked, "Do you get a lot of sex?"

"A lot? That's difficult to quantify. I know I don't get enough and most of my girl friends I've left behind say the same thing but they also say their moms complain their husbands are over-sexed."

"Well we don't know if that is fortuitous do we darling? Using a parallel scenario, what would be our situation if there were enough heart attacks or bowel cancers to go around?"

Taking a moment to take in that concept Dani began laughing. Wiping away a tear she huffed, "God you are funny. And you are not at all like mom despite a similarity in voice tone."

"And thank god for that. Think of all the sex she's missing. You have endeared yourself to me Dani. Call me Ren if you like. It's Ivan's pet name for me and he'll be delighted to hear you use it, thinking you are becoming one of the family. Oh, there's another one of us who has been excited about you coming here. He's Ivan's son Lucas but there's a problem."

"What, he can't keep his zip up?"

Karen cackled and said good one. "I'm hoping you two will hit it off but he's only just turned twenty-five and is, ah, finding it difficult to establish a relationship more than one night long with any female he dates."

"No problem. We can be friends. If he's nervous about it tell him a 20-year old bowled me last year at a party. The lighting was poor and what I had in my hand I thought I was with a guy older than me. I woke up at daylight with him back in me again and I almost freaked out when I saw how young he was but after I climbed down off the wall age was no longer an issue."

Karen howled in laughter and said if she got an opportunity she'd mention some of that to Lucas.

"Lucas Boone... nice name. Karen goes well with Boone. God what an ancient gas oven and the cooker."

"It's yet another something the centre of Ivan's pride. He salvaged it from an old house being demolished and fully restored it. The gas fireplaces in this house are similar reborn units found in junkyards."

"What does Ivan do?"

"He's a retired gas-fitter who had quite a large company and sold it five years ago for almost $5 million clear after repayment of debt. I was new into my second divorce and was driving the Oldsmobile one Sunday afternoon. It belonged to the husband of one of my girlfriends. Ivan drove ahead of me and waved me down. He wanted to buy the vehicle and so I invited him to follow me back to Bella's home. The guys drank two gallons of beer and as Bella and her husband had been talking about renovating their home Ivan said he'd do all the work including installing gas for them in return for Skip signing over the car to him. Skip thought he was getting a great deal, only having to pay for materials, and he did too. But Ivan had acquired a Yank Tank in great condition, ending a two year search."

"Well he sure appears to have initiative."

"True Dani but there was more to come. This house had been converted into two apartments and he came across it, recognizing it as the house he'd grown up in. He'd come down Francis Street looking for it, remembering it was on the sunnier north side, elevated and only a four-minute stroll to the sands of Bondi Beach. This side of the house had not sold because the asking price was too high. Ivan went next door but those owners were not interested in selling. So Dani said to the vendor of the other unit to persuade the Black's to sell for top money and he'd pay both of them the current vendor's asking price. Two nights later they sold to Ivan. He brought in guys that he knew to modernize the interior after reintegrating the two units as a single dwelling, to put in the pool alongside a new outdoor centre and to return the exterior to its original art deco style."

"You must show me through Ren, it looks a beautiful home."

Late morning Dani called her mom in Denver. Karen had said it would be 10:00 at night over there. Dani said that would be okay, that her mom would be in bed reading and her dad would be watching sport on TV. Dani talked to her mom for ten minutes and then handed her phone to Karen, who was wearing only a dress and who talked until the battery ran out.

Dani watched her aunt talking thinking how empty she was compared with her complex sister but as the women passed through preliminaries and began real conversation Dani realized just how vivacious Karen was compared to her mother. Far from being an empty head she was leading the conversation and talking about things that Dani knew were central to her mom's interests. Well, well! And Karen's vitality continued right to the end when she roared 'Fuck' and said, "The battery of Dani's phone is dying, bye darling."

Then instead of uttering crap about how she loved talking to Claire because of course she would, Karen simply said, "When I talk to your mom I feel I'm home, living only a couple of blocks away."

God, her brazen aunt had sensitivity.

Dani was in her bedroom suite when she heard the noise of Ivan arriving home. She gave them a few minutes to greet and stopped on the stairs looking across the family room. Her aunt and Ivan were fucking. Dani had never watched couples fucking outside of her years at college and lingered a moment to observe. Just as she would have expected had she'd thought about it, Ivan was a straight pounder. They were going doggy over the padded rolled end of the sofa. He was just grunting with each thrust but Karen was bucking and calling out encouragement and reaching back with a hand and slapping his bare ass, his pants down around his ankles. Obvious that was confirmation Karen loved being fucked.

Dani retreated upstairs aware her aunt was impressing her.

She read until Karen, looking freshly scrubbed with a change of dress, held out her hand and said, "Pre-lunch drinks darling, the master is home." Dani leaped up and taking her aunt's hand and squeezing it gently wondered if Karen ever did her hair.

Again more surprise. Outside they were seated in what Karen called "Our alfresco area." Bordering the blue-tiled lap pool it was shaded from the searing sun by closely planted towering palms.

Ivan noticed her looking up at them and said, "Eighteen hundred bucks each to buy them and have planted here. I should have paid the guy five thousand a throw. They've made this area liveable in summer heat while completely retaining the essence of a natural outdoor environment."

Dani thrust her glass into her long open mouth. That was Bozo speaking" But that wasn't all. She was in short shorts and a gym top and apart from a couple of quick glances the guy didn't spend all his time staring at her chest or crotch. Didn't he like her? Karen felt overly warm so simply pulled her top down a bit, displaying much of her boobs and it seemed so natural. The guy Dani had called Bozo just looked the once as breast bulk popped into view and then grabbed another piece of Italian bread. Of course the lion had just mated, hadn't he?

Dani sat amused thinking those two spoke a version of English but their version of lifestyle was completely foreign to her from her although she knew from movies that Californians had a liberalized life-style.

Ivan kissed them both. The kiss was on the lips and long for Karen and just a quick touch of lips for Dani and he said informatively, "See you later."

"Where's he gone?"

"I have no idea."

Dani tried again. "Shouldn't you know to try to keep him on a bit of a leash?"

"God darling, I'd grow old trying."

"What if he were... well you know."

"I wouldn't think so but so long as she was disease-free and he arrives home with enough gas in the tank for me what have I to worry about?"

"You could think loyalty."

"Loyalty? Darling Ivan knows I'm his babe and he loves me. More likely he's gone to assist a mate who's behind with contract work, or give a hand to someone working on restoring an old vehicle or to paint his mom's house... anything."

"Or drink with pals?"

"Usually Ivan doesn't drink away from home until the end of the working day, from 4:30 but unless I'm there with him he's soon telling the boys it's off home to the missus. Those guys who know me don't blame him."

"Oh god how embarrassing for you."

"Embarrassing? Most of those guys have little reason to go home early knowing sex for them is rationed."

"Oh god."

Karen laughed and said Dani's values were based on her mother's values.

"Keep them as your core values by all means darling but just remember even I regarded your mom as a bit of a frump by the time she was twenty although she was and still is a lovely person."

"This is confusing for me."

"I'm sure it is Dani. It's too hot to take you shopping locally today so lets go to the mall at Bondi Junction."

"Um, could we drive via the world famous Bondi Beach?"

"Oh of course darling but really it's just a beach, and far too crowded at weekends and on public holidays. Didn't I tell you yesterday that the beach is just down the end of our street?"

"Yes but I didn't realize by beach you meant Bondi Beach."

"Yes that's the one but darling you really must work on your values."

* * *

At the mall Karen took over, saying she'd looked through the clothes Dani had hung in the wardrobe and they were mostly unsuitable.

"What you need is a mix of what we call beachwear plus a bit of what you'll know as resort wear. Even going into the big smoke resort wear will be fine except in winter."

"The big smoke?"

"The city" and seeing the blank look Karen added, "Sydney CBD. Sydney has 4.4 million people."

"Well if I'm to outfit myself shouldn't we go to the shops in the central business district?"

"You could but why fuck around? The WBJ...

"Er?"

"Westfield at Bondi Junction is the sixth largest mall in Australia with more than 350 shops and more than 3000 parking spaces. It's not your village shopping strip and WFJ is geared to the more affluent consumer darling because we are north eastern suburbs."

As they drove on Dani sensed she was in the hands of a reliable consultant. Her mother's much younger sister was only twelve years older than Dani and seemed not to be in her mother's generation, although that couldn't be true. What they were riding in was an Eastern European vehicle that appeared to be designed from a tank with the suspension design and décor unmodified.

They had a wonderful time, mostly because Karen was an exciting person to be with, and they lunched with two of Karen's sexy friends who appeared to be only just on the right side of fifty. Both were extremely pleasant to Dani and that make her think, what else could you expect from people Karen was likely to befriend. When saying goodbye Sharon said, "See you tomorrow night Dani" and Brenda said "Yeah, right."

Taking Dani's arm Karen said, "Ivan is throwing a party for you tomorrow night for you to meet local people, mostly my friends. He thought you might not approve of his friends but now I'm wondering about that. You seem to be taking to him and Ivan is one of the biggest larrikins of all."

"Er?"

"Oh sorry, larrikin is Aussie and Kiwi slang for a mischievous or unruly male. Kiwis are New Zealanders."

"Oh, thanks. I'm thinking Ivan is very okay. I can't really believe he was only a gas-fitter."

"Only a gasfitter? Well he worked ass-up for most of his life and lost everything three times during severe economic downturns that hit new building and renovations but each time he bounced back. At the time of the sale he employed thirty-four gasfitters and plumbers, trainees plus support staff and engaged principally in commercial work through Sydney Met."