To say that I live in darkness is not entirely true. What is true is that I can't see with my eyes, but my other senses can see for me.
I was not always blind, my vision was good until an accident a couple of years ago resulted in my loss of sight. Because I can remember what things look like, I am able to associate their scent with my memory of them. The perfume that wafts from the garden brings a picture of the flower before me. When the neighbours crank up their barbeque and I smell the aroma and hear the sound of steak and onions sizzling away it makes my mouth water.
Up to a point I can take care of myself, I know how to shave by feel so I don't need a mirror for that, the shower has a mixer tap so I can shower without help, the toilet paper is always handy so I can wipe my arse. The food is placed in a certain position by Mary, my carer, so that I can make myself a snack if I should feel hungry between meals. I can even make my own coffee or tea if required.
I have a black eye, his name is Warlock and he's a black Labrador. He is my constant companion as well as my eyes. He can walk me to the shops, especially the pet food shop where he has made friends with the staff who spoil him rotten, giving him lots of pats and the odd treat, he particularly likes pig's ears and will quite happily lie on the floor of the shop and munch away on it while I buy his food.
So, I guess you could say that I had my life sorted, and in a way I have. There is one real problem that I have that I don't know how to overcome. Actually that isn't totally correct, you see, before my accident I had a healthy sex life but after my lengthy stay in hospital and through the rehabilitation process, I found that the girl I thought would stand by me through my problems and support me, went off and married my best friend. Now I am restricted to taking matters in hand, so to speak.
I was sitting on a sun lounge in my back garden, if you can call a couple of potted shrubs in a paved courtyard a garden, soaking up the rays with Warlock stretched out beside me when Mary came and stood next to me. I knew something was bothering her, she only ever did that when she had a problem. "Simon, can I have a word with you?"
"Sure, what's the problem?"
"I've been putting off telling you this because I didn't want you to feel sorry for me, but I have to go into hospital for and operation, it's nothing serious, but I'll be out of action for a couple of weeks and there may be a period of a further couple of weeks before I can come back to work."
"No problem, you go off and get yourself better, I can take care of myself." I was thinking 'what am I going to do? How will I manage? I rely so much on her to prepare meals and do the housework and a whole range of other chores that I probably am unaware of.
"I've been giving it some thought. I know that you can take care of yourself up to a point, but you really do need someone for those things that you can't do, and I think I have a solution."
"I'm all ears."
"My daughter Stephanie, I've spoken to you about her."
"The one who has just split up with her bastard of a husband?"
"That's the one. Well she is having to move out of her apartment and is looking for a place to stay until she can find a new place of her own. I suggested that she could stay here for the time being, you have a spare bedroom that's not being used, so she could stay there, and while she's here she could help you to look after yourself."
"And you have told her that you would talk to me about it and that I'd agree with you so she can stay here?"
"Sort of."
"When can I meet her? I want to see her before I say 'yes'."
"I'll bring her with me tomorrow, you can have a chat and she can get a feel of what she will have to do around here."
Will tomorrow never come? I lay awake in bed imagining what this woman would look like. I have never seen Mary so I have nothing to go on, she may not even look like her mother, who knows? One thing, if she is as caring as her mother she will fit in fine. But then again she could be an ugly and deformed creature whose husband couldn't wait to be rid of. Hurry up tomorrow, the suspense is killing me!
Today is the tomorrow of yesterday, and I have just heard Mary's car pulling into my driveway. Two doors have opened and two doors have closed. A key in the front door lock, a puff of breeze as it opens and the rustle of packages, Mary has done some shopping on the way over. A mumble of voices, "Simon, we're here."
"I'm in the Living Room." I had been sitting here for some time with a classical music station playing softly on my stereo.
I heard them come in, there was a different perfume in the air that I didn't recognise. "Simon, I'd like you to meet Stephanie." I held out my hand and felt it grasped by a soft, small hand. The perfume was closer. "What's the perfume that you're wearing? I don't recognise it? It's somehow familiar but I can't seem to place it."
"It's Obsession."
"I have Obsession but it doesn't smell like that, it's close but no cigar."
"The Obsession for women is slightly different from the men's."
"That must be it. By the way, this black thing beside me is Warlock."
Warlock had introduced himself before I had finished my little speech, I could feel the breeze from his tail as he stood to be petted. "Aren't you the handsomest thing?" Stronger breeze from his tail.
"He'll take all the flattery you can give, so you'll have to go easy on it or he'll think that he runs the show."
'Doesn't he?"
"Sssh, don't tell him that." I told her with mock severity.
We exchanged banter for several minutes before she was called away by Mary to be shown the room that she would be sleeping in, I hadn't actually said 'yes' but it had been assumed that I would, and where everything was.
Mary, with Stephanie's help, made lunch for us, Mary didn't have any because she was on a fast before her operation, and we sat around the table discussing this and that. I sensed that Mary was putting off leaving and was unsure whether it was fear of her operation or concern about Stephanie's ability to look after me.