"Jan was right when she told us to trust you, hon. But don't feel like you're on your own. Use Mom and me to bounce things off of while you think things through. Don't be afraid to use long-distance-there are times when it's worth the expense, and I can probably get an auto-von line at work. You know you're always welcome to move in with us in California, too-they're got some pretty great schools there."
As independent as I thought I was, it felt so good to have Dad's arm around me and to know he was still in my corner. I felt my eyes water up as I hugged him and whispered, "Thanks, Dad."
All eight of us stayed up in the family room until about 11 that night, with conversations that swirled around alternately in small clusters and then with everyone jumping in. It had a very comfortable, safe feeling-maybe more so because we all knew things would never be quite the same.
Dene and I finally fell into bed and I spooned her as we talked softly.
"Dene-what the Hell. Last time we talked, you were going to be a teacher and coach swimming! Where did law school come from? And what's the deal with swim? I had no idea you'd dropped it. You're a damn fish-there's got to be more, isn't there?"
"Yeah. Not sure I want to talk about it."
"Dene-how come? Did you fuck up? You know I don't care. And I think you need to talk. Hon, tell me, OK? Tell your Petey what's going on."
I felt her begin to sob quietly. I kissed her shoulder and drew her closer to me, nestling my cheek next to hers.
"Yeah. I fucked up. With the coach. I feel like I've been cheating on you."
"Holy Crap, Dene! I thought we were past that! You get to do whoever you want! You didn't abandon me. I know you won't ever abandon me, and if you entertain yourself with other lovers while we're apart, it's OK! For God's sake, just look whose arms are you in this minute! And whose pussy were you in the last two nights! You didn't cheat on me, so just cut that crap out. And tell me every lurid detail!"
"You sure?"
"I'm abso-fucking-positive."
"I still feel guilty, but thanks."
"So what happened?"
"Well, the coach called me into her office the first week. She said she always wanted to get to know her girls individually and invited me to her house for dinner. She said it would be a small group of us, but when I got there, it was just me. She was wearing a thin shift, and I could see she was braless. She's built kind of like you, by the way, and I thought: "No big deal-her house, her option." She gave me some wine, and then some more, and then she served a really great linguine dish with these huge shrimp. It felt weird at first, like I was on trial or something. I really worked at not dripping linguine down my blouse or sounding stupid. But between the wine and talking about things to do in Bloomington, and what life had been like in Corpus, she really put me at ease. Then she took me outside to show me her hot tub. It was this big wooden vat on her patio. She had a fence and tall landscaping all the way around the yard, so it was really private. She asked if I'd like to sit in it a while. She offered to loan me a suit if I wanted, but said that she just always skinny dipped and whoosh! She pulled the damned shift over her head! My jaw dropped. Partly because she just stripped in front of me like it wasn't a deal at all, and partially because she had a treasure trail! Not as thick as mine, but there it was."
"It would take a lot to equal this," I said, reaching down to stroke her furry belly. "So, did you? Strip off, I mean?"
"Yeah. I was in full battle gear-blouse, bra, skirt, pantyhose-so I didn't just go 'whoosh, naked' but I got there. She widened her eyes and said I was "an absolutely stunning young woman" and was glad I was comfortable with nudity. I wasn't-comfortable, I mean-but I tried the best smile I could. Seemed to me I WAS on trial now, and it had nothing to do with swimming. But she was pretty hot, and I was a little drunk. I was getting turned on, too, and I'd never been in a hot tub. Before we went to the tub, I got more assertive. I closed the distance between us and gave her the line from The Graduate: "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me."
"My God, Dene, was Mrs. Robinson really her name?"
"Nah-but the shoe fit. She said "Well, what do you think?" I cupped one of her tits, rolled her nipple in my fingers, and said: 'I'm pretty sure you are.' She said: "You may be onto something there." She hugged me in close, slid her hands down to my ass and kissed me. She had an enormously long tongue-when she slid it in my mouth I thought 'now
there's
something that needs to get up my pussy.' We stood there making out for a while-she'd play with my tits, I'd finger her pussy, we'd do some little neck sucks and ear nibbling. Then she said "Shall we?" motioning to the hot tub, and we got in. Gotta tell you Kath, hot tubs are great! She held me in her lap, played with my tits, stroked my bush, fingered my pussy-but it was all slow and gentle. After about 15 minutes, I was limp as a wet noodle! I was surprised how much effort it took to climb out of the tub. We headed to the bedroom and got down to more serious sex. She asked if I liked "devices" or just wanted to play naturally. We went natural. That tongue! Frenching with her was almost like sucking a really agile dick! Honest, she could reach the back of my throat! Her fingers really knew their way around a clit, too. She kept me hovering right on the edge of cumming forever. It was weird when I went down on her. I kept pretending I was you going down on me! You know I've never thought my bush was very sexy-all coarse and thick, and if it wasn't for you, I'd keep it bald above my bikini line. I still like yours best-soft and delicate, tres feminine. But anyway, I ate her out for a long time and got her off probably 4 or 5 times that first night. And then, goddamit, she fell asleep! I was lying there in her bed, so horny I could almost cum without even being touched, and she rolls over and goes to sleep! I figured if she offered "devices," they'd probably be close to the bed, so I went exploring. Found a vibrator-about the size of yours-and got myself off with it. Then, what? Do I spend the night with her? Do I get dressed and bug out? Busses wouldn't still be running and it was a long walk back to the dorm. I didn't have any idea what a cab would cost and I didn't have much cash, so I stayed. Practice was at 5 the next morning, and I figured she'd give me a ride in."
"Well, she gave me a ride, but the mood was WAY different in the light of day. She would hardly look at me. She gave me a bitchy stare when she saw I'd used her vibe. She dropped me at my dorm so we wouldn't be seen arriving together at the pool, and when I got there, late, of course, she bitched me out in front of the team and gave me extra laps. It was pretty confusing and I was late for class because of the extra laps. When we finished evening practice that day, I went in her office and closed the door. I asked why she was mad at me. She slumped, and said she wasn't really mad, but that she always felt guilty after having sex with a girl. She said she had some baggage from growing up in a Pentecostal church, but couldn't seem to stay away from girl-girl sex. I told her I was way past feeling guilty about liking girls and that if she wanted to continue I thought she was a good lover and ought to keep on doing what gave her pleasure. I mean, it just seemed silly now that women would feel guilty, but I remember how we felt when we started out."
"That was a Friday, and our first meet was still two weeks off. She invited me back to her house again for the weekend. THAT was a weekend to remember, I'll tell ya'! Friday night was a repeat of Thursday-wine, nice dinner, making out, hot tub then eating her out for a half hour. And dammit, she went to sleep AGAIN! That was kind of a pisser. I went for the vibe, but she'd moved it. Bitch. I was a woman on a mission! I went around all her bedroom drawers, then into the closet. Paydirt! There was a long, flat box at the back of the closet and when I reached in, I pulled out a different little vibe, smaller than the first one. I got myself off twice with it, and got the sheets good and damp with my pussy juice. I put the vibe back this time so at least she wouldn't have
that
to get bitchy about if the guilt hit her again the next morning."
"I was up before she was Saturday morning and showered while she still sawed logs. I hunted around in the kitchen and started the coffee. The place was kind of a mess in the daylight, so I started straightening and dusting. She stumbled in about 7 (that's a very late morning by swim team standards) and went for the coffee without speaking. I joined her with the dust rag over my shoulder and asked how the guilt was this morning. I tried to make it sound genuinely sympathetic. She clouded up in a frown for a moment, but seemed to relax. 'Thanks for making the coffee' she said, and went into the living room. She didn't seem to notice my cleaning. I let her sip her coffee until it was gone and got her a fresh cup. Finally I said: 'Listen, if this is going to be too awkward, don't feel like you have to let me stay all weekend.' "
"Nope!" she said. "I had a great time last night, and I'm determined not to feel guilty about it. You stay. You administer cunnilingus better than anyone I've ever been with." Dene tried to use some kind of Yankee accent for the coach.
"HA! 'Administer Cunnilingus'?!? Dene, she actually said that?""
"Thought you'd get a kick out of that. Yep-her exact words. And in all the other times we were together, she never said 'pussy' 'cunt' 'tits' 'asshole' 'eat me' 'give head' and especially not 'fuck.' She really was wound around the axle about sex."
